The Sarge is back with a nice LinkxMidna oneshot for everyone! I tried to incorporate a more canonical Link in this one because he doesn't actually talk in the games. ...Yeah.

I am Madame Fanadi. I am the Hyrule mystic, knowing and seeing all.

At least, that's what they think. I know more about people than prophesizing. I just tell them what they want to hear, and they leave happy. After paying, of course. I make good money here; there are all sorts of lovesick teenagers, especially those girls that hang out by the STAR tent.

But I tell you, it isn't always easy. This guy comes in on a Sunday afternoon in the height of the market's commotion, and I can tell he's a farm boy right a way 'cos his mouth's half-open and his eyes are bigger than cucco eggs. He looks taken in with just one glance at my crystal ball. It's weird, though, 'cos he's dressed in all green. I keep a mirror on the door for effect, and there's a sword long as my arm strapped to his back! I just ignore it and give him the usual spiel. Love or career and all that for just 10 Rupees. He holds up one finger, must be mute. One for love, eh? Heh, a romantic farmboy is easier to trick than a Goron, I says to myself. I take his 10 Rupees and start the chanting. Now, I exchange mail with Bo of Ordon, so I know all about the girl Ilia. The mayor won't write a single letter without mentioning something about his little girl. Like how she's in love with the village mute. Oh, you shoulda seen the look on his face when I shouted, "I SEEEE!" This guy almost falls over, so I go right into my "fortune telling."

"Hmm…the one who loves yoouu…sheeeee is the daughter of one hiiigh in power…"

This got the guy in green to start thinking. I saw him clasp his hands together in the mirror on the door.

"Oohhh… this girl cares for aaanimalss…"

Not much on that. I guess everyone has to in a place like Ordon.

"Wait… I seeee… her hair… blonde?"

His shoulders fell at this. He even rolled his eyes! Jeez, I had to make something up, fast!

"No, no! Wait! Err… RED!"

The guy went rigid and his eyebrows went up. Pay dirt!

"Yes, red as the flaaaames of hell…and a personality to match! This giirrl… she is always close by, yes?"

Again, his face was priceless. It turned a shade of deeper red than a Kakariko pepper, and he started to fiddle his his hands behind his back. I was on a roll!

"But bewaaaare! This love is fragile! Fragile, like the…uh… THE MIRROR!" Enthusiastically pointing behind his back, I let out a cackle at his startled expression. He calmed down once he saw it though. Weird.

"Now go, young man… and do… something…"

That nice young man never visited me again.

Uh... yes... Read an' reveiw! Flames accepted, but constructive critisism is better.