Summary: Regina didn't know why her feet brought her here. She shouldn't be taking a stroll in the woods, especially with the Wicked Witch's - her sister's, she corrected - flying monkeys around. Usually, when she needed time alone, she would escape to her office, her house, or more often her crypt - but one of the idiots and their daughter were there already.
But this forest thing…
She could probably get used to it.
Missing scene in 3x16 It's Not Easy Being Green. Why does Regina hide in the forest when she needs to think about the letter? Includes flashback to Fairy Tale Land.
Thanks to thievingevil on Tumblr for the plot bunny. I don't know if this is what you had in mind, but that's what the muse wrote. I don't control it!
Inspiration from the title comes from Lullaby by Sia. I think if I had to choose a score for the fic, it would be the first song on the list.
send a hope upon a leaf
"Odours have a power of persuasion stronger than that of words, appearances, emotions, or will. The persuasive power of an odour cannot be fended off, it enters into us like breath into our lungs, it fills us up, imbues us totally. There is no remedy for it."
― Patrick Süskind, Perfume: The Story of a Murderer
Regina left the meeting hall in haste, her dark cloak swaying heavily behind her, the clacking sound of her heels resonating through the brick walls. She would have stormed out using her powers, but she knew it would have made her situation worse. She was good now, and good people didn't use magic when they could avoid it. Fleeing the room before a considerable ruckus happened was the best option she could come up with.
Snow and David might have accepted and believed in her efforts towards redemption, but the rest of them were only hypocrites. They tolerated her when it suited them - like when she cast a protection spell around the castle - but the moment she proposed a course of actions they disagreed with, they all jumped on their seats and accused her of being The Evil Queen.
She heard Snow's soft footsteps behind her. Of course she would come after her. Perfect Snow White would not let anyone down, especially not her.
Regina knew she had to leave the castle if she wanted to be left alone. The problem was finding a place where no one would think of looking for her. She glanced outside through the enormous windows of the hallway. The forest was at her feet, silently offering her the solitude she desired. If there were a place where no one expected the Queen to go, it had to be the forest.
She disappeared in a wind of purple smoke.
Hiding the aged letter in her coat and tugging on the lapels of her pockets, Regina stormed out of the vault, leaving a stunned Emma and Mary Margaret behind her. They would ask what was wrong. They would try to question her and to get her to open up. She didn't want that, didn't deserve their pity. They were not the people she wanted to sit down and bare her soul with. She couldn't. Not about this - it was too personal.
She fast-walked out of town, with no particular destination in mind. It was a surprise to her when she found herself wandering the forest, looking for a place to rest.
Regina didn't know why her feet brought her here. She shouldn't be taking a stroll in the woods, especially with the Wicked Witch's - her sister's, she corrected - flying monkeys around. Usually, when she needed time alone, she would escape to her office, her house, or more often her crypt - but one of the idiots and their daughter were there already.
But this forest thing…
She could probably get used to it.
Digging her heels into her horse, she went for a fast gallop through the woods, pushing her mare to its limits - as much as she could without harming the beast. The freedom of riding, the rush of fresh air in her lungs as she panted in sync with her mount, the sensation of the horse's contracting muscle in unison with her own - Regina had long forgotten how much she craved it.
Riding used to be her solace when her mother controlled her life. On horseback, she felt unchained, unattainable. Protected.
Then Daniel died. And horseback riding became something she loathed.
She climbed down from her horse when she was far enough from the castle. The beast shook its head, whinnying. The sound made Regina chuckle as she gently patted her horse's back and removed her saddle to relieve her mount. She could only guess how uncomfortable a saddle must be for a horse - probably as much as a corset for her. It was constricting, no matter how much it enhanced your attributes. The last thing she wanted was for her mare to feel trapped with her.
The horse seemed to appreciate the thought because it let out another grunt that sounded happy. Regina's lips turned up even more, and she stroked her mare's collar in gratitude. She had always loved horses. They were majestic and loyal creatures. She felt safe in their company; they couldn't break your heart.
Enjoying the peace and solitude of the forest, the Queen sat down next to her horse, as it dipped its head to nibble the ground.
Regina found a fallen tree hidden behind a bush in a remote part of the forest. It was exactly the kind of isolated and sheltered area she was seeking. Hopefully no one would come looking for her here.
The woods surrounding Storybrooke were so full of life. The wild birds and animals didn't seem to be afraid of the witch. It was a nice change from the stench of sadness, fear, and death that filled the air in town. Their faith loomed over them, suffocating the last bit of hope they had.
The Queen filled her lungs with the sent of wood and pine trees. Nature offered her a comfort she hadn't found in ages, and she couldn't explain why. She had always enjoyed riding on the hills surrounding her childhood home, and it had offered her a freedom she wouldn't have known otherwise. But this was different.
The smell of the forest, the sound of the wind in the trees and the rustling of leaves, the feel of the tree trunk under her fingers as she gently stroked the one she was sitting on - there was something about the woods that made her feel whole, that made her feel at peace. She felt protected. It was as if nothing would harm her so long as she stayed in the forest. She couldn't explain it; she just knew.
A noise in the near distance startled her. Regina glanced at her horse; it was still grazing, oblivious to whatever sound she thought she had heard. The Queen narrowed her eyes and looked around, inspecting the area under and above the trees. Surely no one knew she was here - neither the Charmings nor the Wicked Witch.
There was another faint crack, followed by the sound of crunching leaves.
Holding her breath, she materialized a fireball in her hand, as she tiptoed away from her horse. She heard the echo of an arrow swooshing through the air before she could see it. Turning swiftly on her heels, Regina aimed her fire at the origin of the sound. The flying arrow turned into ashes before it could hit her.
She watched the charred remains fall to the ground, panting. One second later and the stick would have impaled her.
A man emerged from the cover of the trees, hands up. "Your Majesty, I am so sorry," he apologized. "Are you hurt?"
"I'm fine," she scoffed. "No thanks to you." She lost her battle stance, but kept her intimidating eyes on Robin Hood, defying him to approach.
The outlaw insisted, "However I can be pardoned?"
Remorse was evident in his voice. The Queen tried to hide a smirk. At least he was respectful enough to feel guilty about almost putting an arrow through her chest. "You can leave," she commanded. Her need for solitude was far more pressing than any animosity she had with Robin Hood. "If you do, I'm willing to overlook this little incident," she conceded in her best mellowed voice.
Instead of heeding her request, the thief walked purposefully towards her mare and stroked the beast's back. "I didn't know Her Majesty rode," he mused out loud. "I thought royals only used their pretty carriages to get around the kingdom."
"Well you thought wrong," she shrugged off, hoping he would take the hint and leave her alone. Chances were he would tell the Charmings where she was hiding, and the moment they knew she came to the forest for solace, there was no place Regina would be left alone. They already controlled the castle; she didn't want them to have authority over the forest too.
Leaving her horse and turning towards her, Robin pursued, "I think deep down you want to talk about what's bothering you."
"What makes you think I have something to talk about?" she mocked defensively, her hands clasping in front of her.
The thief shrugged. "You wouldn't be hiding in the trees while Snow has Charming and the knights looking every where for you if everything was alright."
Of course Snow had ordered a search. Regina had thought it was in everyone's best interests if she left the castle. She had underestimated her stepdaughter's determination when it came to her. Is that why Robin was here? If so, why wasn't he reporting back? Regina sighed, shoulders slouching, and tried one last time to get rid of him, "Well I have nothing to say to you, bandit."
"Okay," he accepted and stopped pushing her.
But the outlaw never left. He stayed, admired her horse, and then sat down to keep her company - all of that in silence, as per her request. Regina observed him quietly for the first few minutes, convinced he would try to start an awkward conversation. It soon became clear that he wouldn't, but the Queen also realized that Robin had no intention to leave. She had no choice but to act as if he wasn't there. So she lied down on the ground next to him, and let the smell of forest engulf her.
Regina sighed as she took the yellowed piece of paper out of her pocket, her hands slightly unsteady.
She breathed in another puff of the nature filled scent surrounding her. It gave her the necessary courage to read the letter again, as if she didn't know it by heart already.
All this time, she had an older sister, born before her mother attempted her ascend into royalty. Zelena had somehow found Rumpelstiltskin too, and Regina's praised mentor, the second most important father figure in her life, thought her sibling was more powerful than she was. Zelena had challenged her to a fight, and for the first time, Regina was afraid her magic wouldn't be enough.
It was everything she had. Magic was the only part of her life she had control over. Her parents were both dead. Daniel had died too, twice in a way, and Henry, the one person she still loved, didn't remember her. She had hoped her art would be enough to get her through this new threat, but even her trusted powers were letting her down.
And so here she was, in the forest, alone and empty-hearted, turning to the trees for comfort. Nature couldn't let you down. It was always around and didn't judge. She could sit in companionable silence with the forest, and it would remain silent, supporting her and helping her without uttering a word.
Every time she came back from one of her escapades, the Charmings would inquire about her whereabouts - what if the witch had attacked while she was gone, what if they had needed her special abilities. She assured them she kept the castle in sight and would come should they require her assistance. It didn't reassure them, but the Queen wasn't about to let them in on her secret hiding place. Snow knew her well enough not to insist.
However their questioning ruled out the one doubt Regina had, and it warmed her heart more than anything; Robin never told anyone about the sanctuary she had found amidst the trees. Whenever there was a disagreement at the castle and Regina disappeared, the outlaw would leave for the woods too. If anyone noticed, no one said a word. He came to spend time with her, but he never gave away where she was hiding.
Before Regina knew it, what she justified as fleeing the castle became visiting the forest. And if a certain thief was around when she did so, the Queen never exactly complained.
She found herself looking forward to her trips in the woods, be it on foot or on the back of her horse. The next one was always closer, up to a point where she left the castle almost every day. She couldn't get enough of the scents in the forest. When she was there, she could drop her Queen façade; she was completely free. There was no boundary and no one to remind her she had once been evil.
And when Robin was around, he brought forth her good side, with his dimples and lilting accent. He made her laugh, and if she flirted back from time to time, no one was there to judge her. Roland started joining them after some time, his young years slowly healing the Queen's broken heart and making her forget about the raging fight with her sister. Roland would never replace Henry, but the little boy needed a mother figure, and she willingly stepped into the position that Robin allowed her to take in his son's life.
The forest became her comfort zone, the one place where she truly felt whole. They would walk - sometimes only side by side, other times holding hands. They would race their horses together, Roland jumping into the arms of the winner - Regina more often than not. They would climb on the same horse occasionally, Robin wanting to show her a new section of the forest he had discovered during one of his hunts. She let him guide her then, trusting him to keep her safe.
She didn't have to be good or evil when she was sauntering the woods with Robin. He enabled her to find Regina again, to be a woman, and the thief - her thief, she came to call him - didn't judge her. Him, her, the forest - it all became one in her head.
After a year back in their realm, she felt more at home amidst the trees then she did in her own castle.
If Snow asked, she would tell her that Robin's smell was a mere coincidence.
She heard someone sigh behind her.
Regina turned back towards the source of the noise, hastily hiding Rumpelstiltskin's letter in her pocket.
Her eyes met the thief's. She couldn't explain it, but it wasn't a surprise to find him here, in the forest, with her. It felt normal, and, more importantly, it felt right - like they had done this before.
She immediately dismissed the un-Queen-like thoughts seeping into her brain and put on her strong face, determined to make Robin leave before he could make her uncomfortable. The last thing she wanted was for her supposed soul mate to rescue her like he was her valiant knight.
The outlaw obviously didn't get the hint because he sat down next to her on the tree trunk.
A soft wind blowing in her direction brought a familiar scent to her nose.
"Instinct is the nose of the mind." - Delphine de Girardin
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