A/N: Hey guys, another stupid Eric fic. I can't help it, I have such a lady boner for him right now and all I want to do is write about him even though I think no one wants this but me. This has a lot of short and sweet wettings in it because...well, you'll see what I mean.
Each fear came to him suddenly and startlingly, but he was able to fight his way through each one of them with ease and calm down. He did it was such ease, in fact, that he was sure it was impressing the other initiates. He may have been a transfer, but he was not to be taken lightly and he was going to prove that.
As Eric slowed his heart rate and cleared yet another fear, he was suddenly back where he had started. He was still in the chair, still hooked up to the machine, he was still in front of a window where the others could watch him- and he was pleased to see that they all looked as impressed as he had expected. Everything was exactly as it had been before he had begun being assaulted by nightmares, except for one key- and very inconvenient- annoyance.
He really had to piss. Like, so badly he was surprised he hadn't felt it before, and he wondered if the simulation blocked out things like that. Either way, now his bladder was practically throbbing due to its fullness, and he started to get up, only to be stopped as he did.
"Wait," Amar said. "I'm not done with the data yet. You need to stay seated until I say so."
Eric held back a groan as he tried not to squirm in his chair. He really could not afford to wait much longer, and hoped that once he was up, he would be able to excuse himself for a few moments. Asking to go would be a bit...problematic due to one slight issue, but he vowed not to let that bother him this time.
He waited and waited, but Amar did nothing to indicate being even remotely close to done. Eric grit his teeth, the pressure in his bladder growing to the point that he could hardly bear it. He shifted in his seat a bit, struggling to hold it.
He could not believe he was even in this situation. He could not remember having to pee this badly in years. He was always so careful about things like this, but now he was unable to keep from squirming as he waited.
By the time Amar finally let him up, he could not stand still, and shifted his weight from foot to foot before he was instructed to rejoin the other initiates. As he walked back, each step jostled his bladder more than he would have liked, and he was instantly panicked when he felt a small leak escape him.
No, no, no, he was not going to wet himself in front of everyone like that! He had just proven how intimidating he really was, he was not going to throw that all away over something like this. He was going to hold it until he got to the bathroom.
"Be right back," he mumbled, starting to walk away.
"And just where do you think you're going?" Amar called after him.
"Probably gonna puke after that simulation," said one of the Candor transfers with a snort.
He felt his face flush and tried to will himself to say what he was actually leaving for, but he could only manage to say, "No, I'm not."
"Then, again I ask, where do you think you're going?"
"Nowhere, never mind," he said softly, looking down and squirming. This was not good at all. No matter how hard he tried, he could not get himself to say what he needed or go for it, and he leaked again.
Without even realizing what he was doing, he put both hands to his crotch, grabbing himself through his pants to stop the flow. Every part of his mind was screaming for him to stop before someone noticed him, but he could not let go, and he soon heard a mixture of gasps and giggles coming from those around him.
"Aw, man, is he gonna piss himself?"
"Not so high and mighty now, huh?"
"I thought he transferred from Erudite. Shouldn't he at least be smart enough to know when to go to the bathroom?"
He tried to block out what they said and tried to rush from the room, but before he could make it very far, he lost control. He could hear the roar of laughter as his bladder began to empty. He could feel his hands start to grow hot and damp, the panic causing his heart rate to jump, but then, as he soaked his pants, it suddenly slowed. The relief was so overwhelming that he couldn't help but be calm and then...
He was back in the chair.
He was back in the chair, hooked up to the machines, and the other initiates were still on the other side of the window, still looking impressed by him. And, he was incredibly relieved to notice, his pants were dry and his bladder was perfectly under control. He blinked a bit in confusion before it hit him.
It had all been part of the simulation. It had seemed so real that he had not realized he hadn't woken up yet, but it had been in his head. No one had actually seen him wet himself.
But he was sure he saw Amar smirking a bit as he left.
~X~
It was pretty obvious, really. He should have expected something like that to appear in his fear landscape, all things considered. Since childhood, he had been incredibly bladder shy, for reasons unknown to him. Pair that up with a crippling fear of public humiliation, and it made perfect sense that he would have to confront a scene where he had to either admit his need or wet himself.
Now the only problem was figuring out how to overcome it for real next time. He had been lucky enough that the relief had calmed him down enough to end the simulation before it had lasted too long, but eventually he would have to clear it legitimately if he were ever going to get anywhere in Dauntless.
The first option was the most obvious. He would just have to openly admit his need and excuse himself to the bathroom, despite how hard it was for him. That would be easy enough for anyone else, but he knew this would be a challenge that would take a lot of training from him. Still, it beat the second option.
The second option was a lot more humiliating, he thought. For that one, he would skip announcing the situation, but he would also skip the holding, and would go straight for a deliberate wetting. Though that might honestly be the more brave thing to do, he was not sure he would ever have the courage to openly and intentionally wet himself, even if it was just in a simulation.
So the only real choice was the first, and for that to work, he would need to try again as soon as possible. He would have to revisit his fear landscape.
~X~
This time, he was prepared for the scenario, but even if he hadn't been, he still wouldn't have been fooled, because it took place in an entirely different setting. Instead of finding himself in the chair, like before, he found himself in the training room, at the row of punching bags.
He was somewhat annoyed to see that the simulation had placed him next to that annoying Stiff who thought he was hot shit just because of his low fear count, but he did not have much time to think of that as the urge to piss hit him like a punch. He was immediately overcome with the desire to grab himself, but he refrained. He had to forget that for now, and instead focus all of his thoughts on overcoming his fear.
"I'm..." he started to say. But his voice trailed off and he couldn't speak.
"Did you say something?" asked Four, looking over at him.
"No, mind your own damn business," he snapped, the swelling of his bladder making him edgier than usual. It didn't matter; this Four wasn't even real. He could be as nasty as he wanted to, if he had the time to worry about such things. But, sadly, he didn't.
And he couldn't excuse himself. He knew that that was what he had to do, but he just couldn't do it.
He wanted to scream, but instead threw a solid punch at the bag. He was so goddamn weak! How was it he could fight his way through every other fear, but he could not summon up the strength to excuse himself to the bathroom?
And then he felt a sharp pang in his bladder and he was once again forced into grabbing himself and squirming, and listening to the roar of laughter that echoed through the training room. He kept his eyes focused on the ground, refusing to see their faces- particularly Four's- as he was mocked. He knew what was coming in just a few short seconds, but he was powerless to stop it.
He felt the too-familiar sensation of his hot piss leaking through his pants, soaking his hand and darkening his pants, running down his leg and splashing on the floor with a loud hiss. And he let out a sigh of both disappointment and relief, his heart rate yet again slowing enough to force him out of the simulation.
He had failed yet again.
~X~
Time went on, and Eric continued to practice. Whenever he had the spare time, he would run through his landscape again, the other parts getting so easy they took him no time at all, but the final one still gave him more trouble than it should have. Each time, he got a little bit closer, but each time, he could not get up the nerve before he wet himself.
To make matters worse, he was falling in the ranks. He had been on top for so long, and then, after a humiliating defeat, Four had fucking surpassed him. Against all odds, he had beaten him in that fight, and he was in second place. Eric had no intention of being second to anyone, but he needed an advantage in the fear landscape if he was going to improve his standing. And it was incredibly hard to get a time advantage over someone with only four fears.
Therefore, he could not afford to wait until the end of the scene. He lost too much time that way, and that was not counting the points he would lose due to the simple fact that he didn't really overcome that last fear. He had to get it right this time.
He had been sent to a variety of different scenarios. He had been back at his old school, presenting, once, and another time, he had been out with some girl he had had a bit of a crush on before he had grown out of such things. The most recent time, he had been placed right outside a bathroom, with a large crowd blocking the door that he could not even manage to rudely shove aside, much less politely ask to move.
This time, he was at his old school again, but this time he was waiting on his turn for the aptitude test. He was so used to the sudden fullness of his bladder, that it did not startle him in the slightest anymore. He crossed his ankles mechanically, as it was just going through the motions for him now. He fidgeted like always, and clenched his fists, resting them on his thighs.
This time, he thought. Just say it, and this will all be over. This time. He unclenched one fist and slowly raised his hand, pressing the other first into his lap and grimacing. He was getting incredibly tired of the feeling of his bladder aching like this every time. He began to tap one foot.
After a few moments of having his hand raised, the teacher finally took notice of him and said, "Yes, Eric?"
"Can I..." As always, he trailed off just before he could say it. Heat rushed to his face as he felt the eyes of all of the other students- who he noticed now were the other transfers- on him. "May I please..." Could he really not do it this time, after all this work?
"Any day now, Eric," the teacher said, saying in exasperation.
"May I please go to..." He couldn't say it. Again. He slammed his hand down on his desk, hard, causing the others in the room to jump a bit.
"What's wrong with him?" he heard someone whisper. He was so close to losing control already, but knowing that they were paying close attention to him only made it harder for him. He crossed his legs a bit tighter, pressing his fist down harder.
"Look at him, I think he's gotta piss or something," another one said.
He sighed in defeat, closing his eyes and letting his hands drop to his side as he felt the first spurt of piss escape him. Soon, he had soaked through his pants and it rolled off the chair, spattering on the floor in steady drops.
And then he was back in the Dauntless compound, dry and frustrated at his failure. He had come closer than ever that time, and had really thought he had it. He vowed that this would be the last failure he had.
~X~
The very next day, he was ready to try again. He had coached himself over and over again, reminding himself that he had a lot more riding on this than just overcoming a stupid fear. He had to get an advantage over Four, and this was the only way he was going to do it this late in the game.
He went into his landscape with steely determination, once again breezing through as if it were nothing. He noticed that a few of his scenarios had disappeared altogether, having been completely overcome due to having to face them so often. All were so easy for him now, he could almost forget the challenge that lay ahead.
But then he was back in the chair, with all the initiates watching. He wondered why he was being given a repeat of the first time when all of the other scenes had been new, but that didn't really matter now. Only one thing did.
Just like before, he was not allowed to stand up for such a long time that he could not stand still, and just like before, he felt himself leak as he walked. Just like before, he started to leave the room, and just like before, he was asked where he was going.
"Probably gonna puke after that simulation," said the same Candor transfer as before. And this time, hearing that taunt caused something in him to snap. He didn't know what it was that did it; maybe it was the fact that he had grown to really like that Candor over the course of the initiation, or maybe it was just because he had been mocked by imaginary people one too many times.
Either way, this, coupled with the determination he had entered the landscape with, was all he needed to push himself to say, "No, I'm not, I'm just going to take a piss."
And then the initiates were gone, and he was alone, and he had done it. He had finally done it! After many, many fruitless attempts, he had finally forced his way through it, and with quite a bit of ease this time, too.
He would certainly pass his final examination with ease now, and he fervently hoped this would be enough to force him back up in the ratings.
~X~
When the day came, he was all confidence, still internally gloating over the fact that he had overcome each and every one of his fears. He was going to blow this out of the water, and then everyone would know, once and for all, who was really on top. There was no doubt in his mind that today would change everything for him.
But then he saw how unbelievably quickly Four finished his own fear landscape. Of course, he had the edge of having a lot less to contend with, and sure, they ranked based on more than speed, but Eric knew he had to really impress them to have even the slightest chance of rising.
The first option for his final fear was not going to cut it, and he knew. But that meant he would have to do the second option, and that did not seem possible. It was humiliating, to the point that thinking about it made it hard for him to breathe, but he had known from the beginning it was the more brave option, and now that he was faced with this situation, he knew that more bravery could only help him.
As he waited his turn, he began envisioning the scene in his head. He ran through every scenario that had been thrown at him during his practice runs and imagined himself letting go of his own free will, in front of everyone. It wasn't as if he hadn't wet himself in the simulation before (even if those times were against his will), but this time, there really would be people watching. No one had actually seen him do that, except for Amar, and he had already taken care of that.*
He had to do it, though. He had to find the courage to do something so stupidly impulsive and devil-may-care that it proved him to be more Dauntless than anyone else in his class. He began to channel all the frustration he had felt when he had first managed to overcome it, hoping that he could apply it to this situation too.
Before he knew it, it was his turn, and he strode forward with confidence, a cocky smirk on his face. Inside, he was growing more and more calm; he knew he could do this if he just focused on the irritation he had felt being taunted and the irritation he felt whenever he remembered being defeated by Four.
He had a few less fears than that first day, but still more than his rival, but he could still breeze through them as if he weren't afraid. It had gotten too easy for him, and he was almost craving the last one, knowing it would be the only one to give him a challenge today, and then he would come out on top, where he belonged.
At last, he was in what he knew had to be the last one, because he was again in the original scenario, the only difference being that Amar was no longer the one overseeing his simulation. For whatever reason, it was Four this time, though the dialogue did not change in the slightest, nor did the pain in his bladder or the uncontrollable urge to squirm.
But this time, when he was granted permission to get out of the chair, instead of rejoining the other initiates, he gave them an arrogant grin and held his arms out to his sides in a theatrical manner. His head tipped back a bit, he closed his eyes to make his expression look blissful and let out a loud sigh of relief as he began to piss himself completely on purpose.
The feeling of the hot liquid running down his leg was not new to him in the slightest by the point, but this time around, it almost felt nice. In fact, the more he thought about it, it always felt nice to empty out like this after feeling so full, but the humiliation and determination to do better the next time had canceled that out for him.
This time, however, he was free to enjoy it, until the simulation suddenly ended. The leaders observing him gave him some strange and amused looks, but he merely smirked and shrugged, getting up to give the next person a turn and wait for the results to be posted.
It seemed he really had overcome his fear, once and for all.
*For those of you who have read the short stories and get this, sorry for being kinda shamelessly dark there.
A/N: There was a lot more bullshit character stuff in here than planned, but I'm still pretty happy with it. Bladdershy Eric is my new favorite thing, not gonna lie. Sorry for writing this, I know I'm trash, but this was so much fun for me.