Full Summary: America invites England and Japan camping to celebrate his new awesome tent but somehow all the other nations get invited and a quiet week of admiring America's new purchase turns into a loud, alcohol fuelled affair where inhabitions run a little too low and Japan and Hungary worry they might run out of memory for their cameras. FrUK, USUK, AmeCan, Giripan, GerIta, Spamano, SwissLiech, LietPol, RoChu, PruHan/AusHan (possible Frying Pangle), SuFin and DenNor (plus non paired characters Sealand, Latvia, Estonia, Iceland, Seychelles and Belgium).
Also the relationships will be slow building so if you're hoping for le sex in the next chapter you're going to be disappointed.
(As an added afterthought (now five chapters in), I should mention that all the above relationships will progress differently and not everyone will end up as a couple running off into the sunset together. This doesn't mean that the relationships won't happen but rather that while two characters might end up committed to one another, another pairing might begin dating whilst another could end up looking to reassess their current relationship. Hopefully this won't put anyone off.)
Hetalia Goes Camping
Chapter 1
"Dudes!" America shouted as he threw the door open and broke into the room with a giant grin on his face. "Guess what I just bought?"
"Something super sized," England said and sipped his tea.
"Something awesome!" America shoved a shiny advertisement in front of England and Japan's faces.
Japan blinked at the picture. "Uh, I am unsure of what I am looking at, America-san."
"Come on, bro, it's a tent, for camping. Don't tell me you don't have tents in Japan?"
"Of course, but I have never seen so tent as..."
"Pompous?" England suggested.
"Extravagant."
"I know right," America said and looked longingly at the paper. "It's got, like, three bedrooms and a ridiculously huge main room, a porch and tinted windows and all these other cool things that I don't real care about but made it super expensive."
Japan smiled. "It's very impressive."
"And not at all a waste of money," England muttered into his drink.
America beamed. "It sure is."
"So I take it you are going camping, America-san?"
"You bet. And I'm taking you guys with me."
England spluttered into his drink. "You want us to go with you?"
"Of course." America wrapped his arms around England and Japan's shoulders, ignoring their uncomfortable squirming. "We can barbecue and cook s'mores and tell spooky stories – but not too scary," America quickly added. "And we can go fishing and swimming and hiking and shooting."
"I don't really think that's quite our thing," England said and freed himself from America's hold.
"I am afraid I would have to agree with England-san," Japan said.
"But..." America waved the advertisement around, "I bought a tent. A really expensive tent."
"You can still go camping," England said.
"But I don't want to go on my own. I'll be bored and it'll just be me and my thoughts and they get so annoying. Please come with me, please?" When neither of them spoke, America added as a afterthought, "You know drinking beer is a huge part of camping. It's kind of the only thing to do in the evening."
England looked up from his tea. "Really?"
"Totally."
England absently trailed a finger around his cup. Whilst he wasn't one for shooting or hiking or spending a week holed up with America in too close quarters, it would be nice to get away from the city and breathe in fresh air for once. He could always ditch America and take a walk with his supernatural friends or perhaps Japan whose company he enjoyed. Plus he'd be free of that French prat and able to drink as much as he wanted.
"Well I suppose it would be an experience," England said slowly.
"And you can take pictures and be at one with nature and all that bullcrap," America said to Japan.
"I do enjoy taking photographs," Japan said, thinking that he would bound to get a few good candids with England and America trapped together and intoxicated.
"Awesome," America shouted and slapped them heavily on the back. "Now first things first - food."
"I can-" England began.
"Let me finish," America yelled before England could complete his nausea inducing sentence. "I was gonna say that I can bring the food and that way I can make sure we'll have enough to last us so we don't turn cannibal and start eating each other's asses."
Japan tilted his head. "I'm not sure if that sentence could have been better phrased."
"I can bring food too. I could bake us my famous scones."
America's eyes widened in fear. "What, no, you can't do that to us."
"There's nothing wrong with my cooking!" England yelled.
Japan refrained from speaking.
"Actually I have a more important task for you."
"If I was in charge of the food I wouldn't just bring that processed junk you shovel into your face all day and night!"
America choose to derail the argument before they ended up stuck with all things burnt and lumpy. "It's about the beer."
England paused. "What about it?"
"I think you should be in charge of all the alcohol."
England crossed him arms. "You just don't want me near the food, which I think is very high and mighty of you considering how much you used to stuff your face with my meals when you lived with me."
"I think perhaps America-san is right in that you would be better suited to providing us with the beer," Japan said with a slight bow. "You are certainly the expert when it come to alcohol."
England's frown turned into a sigh. "Fine, I guess I can do that. After all I couldn't expect America not to bugger it up."
America and Japan swapped a relieved look.
"What should I bring, eh?" a voice asked.
Japan, America and England turned around. Stood almost invisibly behind them was Canada clutching his bear and smiling happily.
"Er..."
Canada waited patiently.
"I'm not... I mean... I..." America glanced at England and Japan. None of them knew how long he had been back there; the guy was like a ninja.
The smile on Canada's face faltered. "You did mean to invite me, right?"
America hadn't, though to be honest he hadn't thought not to invite him, he just hadn't thought about him one way or the other. He supposed one more couldn't hurt.
"...yeah? All the merrier, I guess." America said and scratched the back of his head.
Canada's face lit up again. "So what should I bring?"
"Er..."
England turned to America. "What about the camping equipment you don't have?"
"Yeah, bring that," America said loudly, glad to be back on track.
"Okay," Canada said. "What don't you have?"
America shrugged.
England sighed. "Did you actually buy anything apart from that ridiculous tent?"
"I forgot," America mumbled sheepishly before returning to his usual self. "But seeing as how I bought the world's greatest tent it's only fair that Canada buys all the crap no one cares about."
"I suppose that's fair," Canada said though he sounded unconvinced.
"And what shall be my task?" Japan asked.
"You can bring food too."
"Are you fucking kidding me you wanker! And exactly how many burgers and ice cream are you planning on inhaling?"
"I think we might end up with too much food," Japan said.
"Dude," America said. "There can never be too much food."
"Then why can't I bring anything!" England shouted, his face dark with anger.
Behind them, the polar bear looked up and asked, "Who are you?"
"I'm Canada."
#
"You brought three boxes?" England asked staring at the boxes which were really the size of small crates.
"What? No, don't worry I have two more over there." America said pointing behind Japan.
"You brought five boxes?"
"Yeah, good thing I figured Japan wouldn't pack enough for a Western appetite."
"I have packed enough food to last four men a week," Japan said as he slid a box onto America's truck. "Provided they eat sensible portions."
"Dude, no American can live off those children sized portions, not even children. And why is no one complaining about all the beer England's bringing."
"Because I brought a sensible number!"
"There's like twenty-five packs of twelve here!"
"Twenty eight packs," England huffed. "Twelve each a day."
"Are you trying to kill Japan?"
"It's not like I'm going to force him to drink them. And it's not like beer can go bad if it's not drunk."
"We should finish packing while we wait for Canada," Japan said before the conversation could spiral into fighting. He was also beginning to doubt his decision to go camping with England and America, no matter the compromising shots he would gain.
"Where is Canada?" England asked. "He's late."
"He better arrive soon. I'm getting hungry."
England grumbled under his breath but refrained from complaining as he helped Japan carry one of America's food crates. They were almost done when Canada arrived, jumping out of his car and running over to them with apologies.
"Do not worry, Canada-san, you have arrived in time."
"Oh, thank goodness. I was worried we would miss you."
"We wouldn't have left without you," America said. "You have all the equipment that isn't the world's best tent."
"What do you mean 'us'?" England asked.
"Bonjour," France trilled as he appeared from behind Canada's car.
"Why the hell did you invite that cheese eating, surrender monkey?"
Canada hugged his bear tight. "America said 'the more the merrier'."
"America's an idiot."
"Hey!"
"I don't see why I wasn't invited in the first place," France said with an air of having been wronged.
"Because no one wants to avoid being groped as you flounce around the place," England yelled.
"I do not flounce!"
"That's not the part you should be defending!"
Japan exhaled. The camping trip was turning less into a holiday for him and more into a job as group mediator. However, the introduction of France would certainly spice up his photos.
"Whatever man, you can't come," America said.
"Pourquoi?"
"Because no one wants you here," England said.
"Because we barely have enough food for four people and I'm not sharing with you."
"But I brought food," France whined. "Enough to share with everyone."
America smiled and slapped his back. "It's good to have you here."
England shook his head. "No, I don't want him here. He'll just stink up the place and there's no way in hell I'm sharing a tent with him."
"It's not like I want to see your sour face all week," France said. "Why don't you go home and I'll take your spot."
"You can't kick me out, I brought the beer, none of which you're having."
"Like I care about your watery drink, I brought wine, lots of it so no one cares if you leave."
England grabbed France's shirt. "At least I was invited and didn't have to worm my way in."
"I bet America only asked because he felt sorry for you," France said and caught England's jacket.
"You wouldn't even be here if you didn't have food. No one likes you France!"
"Ha! At least I have friends unlike Mr 'Splendid Isolation'!"
England launched himself at France and the two rolled around on the floor, throwing punches and screaming insults as Canada pleaded for them no stop. America laughed and munched on popcorn whilst Japan snapped a quick shot to add to his ever expanding England vs. France albums.
#
A few hours later the five nations arrived at their destination, England still in a foul mood and Canada nursing a sore arm from losing Punch buggy to America. Between the five of them they hauled the tent, camping equipment and some of the food and drinks to a large clearing in the forest. They had only set their things down when voices trailed their way.
"By the way," France muttered with a gleam in his eye. "I might have invited a few of my friends."
"You don't mean-" England asked.
France grinned. "Oui."
"What? Who is it?" America asked.
"Hallo losers, the awesome me is here," Prussia said as threw himself dramatically into the clearing.
England dropped his head into his hands.
You may not have gathered this from my highly detalied descriptions but I know very little about camping, including (but not limited to) tents, camping equipment and what you actually do when you go camping unless you're a teen in a horror flick in which case you die.
I'm also English and I dropped German and failed French so that should give you an idea of my language skills, therefore everything is Google translated so let me know if I screw anything up. Same if I mess up American, Canadian or whatever slang.
Anyway, thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed the first chapter of my first Hetalia fic (and my first fan fiction in a very long while). All the other characters will be introduced next chapter where there will be more fun, more arguments and more of me struggling to fake my way through anything camping related.
I'm really glad I hinged my story on something I know nothing about.