So… I know this is not the best of me that you will ever see, and yes I do enjoy a little bit of boy to boy love. And yes I do think that two brothers in love are like the hottest thing, you may call me sinner, but I don't give a fuck.

Disclaimer: characters belong all to J.; this is a story for mere amusement.

Because I'll never let you go

I know it's disgusting, but I cannot help it, this feeling inside me, creeping up like little spiders in my stomach, tingling every little part of my body, making me dizzy. Only god knows how this feeling is killing me inside, but I love him, and it would kill me even more to deny it, yes, he's my brother, but I love him. Now, I know he will never love me back, but I can live with it, just being by his side, seeing his blonde hair shine in the sun, and his blue eyes sparkle while he looks into the sky. Lysander is the only person I will ever love, because he's my twin, my other half and I belong with him.

"Birds are fascinating creatures" he whispered while laying on the grass, looking up into the blue sky, just like his eyes.

"They are" I replied, while laying next to him, I snatched a glance at him, but he was no longer looking into the sky, but looking at me.

"Lorcan, why do you think we weren't born with wings?" he asked me, it took me a while to process an answer, as I was too mesmerized watching is smooth white skin.

"Maybe… because god wants us to learn how to fly in other ways, because he wants us to grow strong, intelligent and independent, he didn't gave us wings, but he did gave us magic" I replied.

"Then why muggles don't have magic?" he asked again.

"I think, is because muggles are more hard working, they have goals and they learn how to work the hard way, I think, if muggles didn't exist, world would be a chaos, so god wants them to stay strong and keep our world moving, so he keeps them in the ground" I said.

"Wizards don't appreciate muggles enough" Lysander murmured. I nodded in agreement.

This were the moments when I loved Lysander the most, his mind, was so full of fascinating questions, his mind was so open to the world, and he always wanted an opinion in it, he never felt embarrassment of his curiosity. And also, never judged an answer, he always considered every possibility. I know, that if I told him I loved him, more than a brother, he would be open minded, but I don't think, he would feel the same way, and I don't think, that we could be the same way. That's why, is good that this happened to me and not him; I can keep it inside, because his presence is just enough.

"Let's go inside" he said quickly, I was so immersed in watching the blue sky that I barely noticed when he stood up. He reached his hand to me, to help me stand up. Lysander has always been a little bit taller and stronger than me, this different was so faint that I think only my parents and I knew about it.

We were walking side to side as we always did, through the corridors. They were empty, with final exams approaching; everybody was either in their common rooms or the library. Lysander and I weren't much of the studying type; we just knew the stuff, I'm not saying that we were gifted or anything, we just paid a lot of attention, and every time one of us didn't know something, the other one knew it, so we could help each other.

We where going up some stairs, heading to the Ravenclaw tower. Suddenly I tripped, Lysander grabbed my body and pulled it against his, the tunnel was much closed, and our bodies were so near. My heart started beating faster, as I was looking into his eyes, our faces were really close and I could feel his breath coming into my mouth. My heart was beating really fast and loud, I could even swear that Lysander could hear it.

"Lorcan" Lysander whispered my name. He then leaned in and pressed his soft lips against mine.

I couldn't believe what was happening, and when I got back to reality, I responded to the kiss, as our lips moved synchronized, his tongue then invaded my mouth, and I caressed it with mine, as a soft moan came from my throat. My hands moved up and down his back, while he played with my hair, as blond as his, and caressed my cheeks. Then, when we were completely out of breath, we pulled apart. I looked at him confused, but feeling an enormous happiness inside me, I just wanted to scream and laugh.

"I… I… I'm so-" he stuttered as his face went as red as the Weasley family's hair.

"Shh" I silenced him, as I stroke his cheek, I laughed, as I pressed my forehead against his, he laughed with me. "I love you" I whispered when we calmed down, I looked seriously into his eyes. He made the most beautiful smile I've ever seen, and kissed me softly on the lips.

"Me too, more than you can imagine" he said, I hugged him tightly. "I was so afraid, that you would reject me"

"I was afraid, that you wouldn't look at me the same way again" I said, burying my head in his shoulder.

We stood there for some time, just feeling each other, and the happiness that filled us in front of this realisation. We then decided to change our route, we went directly to the 7th floor corridor, and entered the room of requirement; we then sat in the floor, looking at each other, occasionally laughing. Until we couldn't suppress our desire anymore.

We kissed, gently at first, just our lips dancing with each other at the rhythm of a song only our hearts knew, then as we got closer; our tongues joined the dance timidly. I caressed his face and played with his silky hair, as his hands made a trip around my back. I moaned when one of his hands slipped down my shirt, it was cold, and it felt really good.

I quickly started undoing the buttons of my shirt, as his lips went down my neck, making it only more pleasurable. Impatient Lysander pulled my shirt open, ripping the last few buttons, and throwing back my shirt. I was surprised by his anxiety, he pulled his t-shirt up, taking it out, as I started undoing the belt on his jeans, and pulling them slightly down.

I made my way down his chest, licking his nipple, which were hard with the excitement and finally reached his cock. I started kissing the places around it, teasing him a bit, until his pleads reached me, and I introduced the member into my mouth, licking and sucking it. I heard Lysander moan with pleasure, as his breath became agitated. He's hands caressed my torso, and finally rested on my hair, finally he lifted my head gently and locked his lips with mine, as I pulled me softly back, laying me in the soft carpet, while his hands pulled off my pants.

He made the same way as me down my body, until he reached my cock, and started licking it up and down, I was so aroused I thought I was going to explode, Lysander's soft lips went up and down in it, making me more and more excited, so much I couldn't the moans, I was panting and sweat covered my body.

"L-Lysander… let go, I'm… I'm coming" I warned him. He looked at me as he bit his lower lip, with a teasing face.

"Come" he ordered, as he kept sucking my cock.

"N-not with you there" I said embarrassed, as I covered my face. I couldn't hold it any longer, and as I felt myself come, I heard as he swallowed it. "How could you!" I said embarrassed, he just chuckled and licked his upper lip.

He came back to my face, as he started penetrating me, I flinched my head back, as I covered my face, embarrassed. "Let me see your face, Lorcan" he whispered in my ear, making me tremble, he started moving up and down. He grabbed my hands and held them up with only one of his.

His eyes penetrating my face as he kept moving. "Ah!" a moan escaped my lips, and I looked to the side, unable to face him. With his other hand he made me look at him, while he kept moving up and down, making me explode with pleasure, I saw his mouth panting. It felt so good; I never wanted him to stop. I couldn't distinguish the line between pain and pleasure; it was all mixed up in a ball of emotions. I wanted my brother deeper inside.

"Ah! Ha-harder" I said, hugging myself to his torso, as the thrusting became faster and stronger, my whole body trembled in pleasure, It felt so good that I couldn't believe it.

"Lorcan" he called my name in a soft whisper, as he got even faster and stronger, the pain was unbearable, and so was the pleasure, "Lorcan" he repeated, hugging me tighter, and pulling me up, until I was seating in his lap, with is cock thrusted inside me, he didn't stop moving,

"Ah! I can't… anymore, I'm c-coming" I moaned. As I felt my end coming. "Ah!" I couldn't suppress the pleasure anymore.

"We will end it together, hold it… a little longer" he said as he got even harder, I heard his panting, his grip got stronger as he warned me about the end.

We came together, between moans of pleasure and relief; we fell in the soft floor, as we both panted exhausted. Lysander pulled himself out of me "ouch!" I twitched, as he pulled it out.

"Sorry… are you ok?" his blue eyes looked into mine with a worried expression. He brushed my hair with his fingers.

"I'm fine" I raised my arms and pulled him against me. I couldn't get myself to raise my body, as it ached too much, mostly my bottoms.

"I love you" he whispered, the he kissed my hair and hugged me tightly against him.

"Me too" I said, as I laid my head in his chest.

We fell asleep in that position, now we were no longer twins, we were two half who had finally joined together to become one. Our soles were one, and so was our heart. I would never let him go. Because he was me, and I was him. You may call me disgusting, you may call me sinner, but I don't care, because I only need my brother to love me.

The End

Well that's it. Hoped you all enjoyed it, I practically had lots of fun while writing it. Remember to leave me some reviews, and I may work a little bit more in boys love, but first I have to finish my Scorpius/Lily fic. If you want, you may have a look into it, maybe leave me some opinions.

Well, that's it. Thank you and goodbye.

Gus.