"Hello?" Kevin answered the phone, leaning against the kitchen counter, confused by the unfamiliar number

"Kevin?"

"Who is this?"

"It's me, Joe…" Kevin froze. He hadn't spoken to Joe in well over two years.

"How did you get this number?" Kevin asked the question shakily.

"Nick…"

"I told him not to give it to you."

"Well, he didn't for almost 3 years."

"Oh."

"So…" Joe bit his bottom lip and an awkward pause followed. "How are you?"

"Fine."

"How have things been?" Joe clearly wasn't satisfied with Kevin's answer.

"Fine."

"What are you doing?"

"Ask Nick if you're so curious."

"I want you to tell me." Joe's voice was different, deeper…softer.

"Look, you don't have the right to do this, Joe, I didn't give you my number because I didn't want you calling it. You can't just waltz in to my life and ruin it all over again."

"I didn't mean to-"

"You broke my heart Joe."

"Kevin, I didn't mean to!" Joe pulled at his voice, attempting to make the words sound genuine and pleading.

"Yes you did. You knew that it would break me to lose you just then, your timing was horrible and on top of all of that you were too scared to just tell me so you had me 'catch' you with a girl."

"Kevin, I don't think I'll ever be able to tell you how sorry I really am…"

"I wanted you out of my life Joe, and guess what? You may find this hard to believe, but until the stupid phone rang, I was actually having a good day. I got a raise at work and I don't hate my job, so just hang up and leave me alone." Kevin wanted nothing more than to slam the phone down in the cradle and end the call with Joe forever, but the phone was frozen in his hands.

"Don't do this, I just want to be brother's again…you can't deny it Kev, we're family."

"Don't call me Kev."

"Fine, Kevin…we're still family and I don't want to lose you."

"You already did." Again, Kevin couldn't help but think how that would have been a perfect place to hang up on Joe, but he couldn't do it.

"I want to see you again Kevin…"

"Well I don't want to see you."

"Look, you don't have to show up, but I'm going to be at the Starbucks down the street from mom and dad's at noon tomorrow. If you change your mind, I'll be there until 1."

"Don't waste your time."

"In case you change your mind." Joe hung up, leaving Kevin shaking with the phone in his hands. He dialed the number of the only person he could think of.

"Kevin?"

"How could you do that to me?"

"What do you mean?" Nick asked.

"How could you give him my number?!"

"Kevin, don't be angry…please, I'm just sick of you two fighting. He shows up here every day and begs me for it! I was bound to crack at some point!"

"Yeah, well you fucked up, he wants to meet me, Nick, tomorrow."

"Just go, patch up, we can be a family again, I missed you at Christmas…"

"I told you, I'd make it up to you…" Kevin sighed.

"So make it up to me by fixing at least some of your issues with Joe. Kevin, it's not just Joe that wants you back in his life, I hardly see you, like once a month…it's not enough."

"I told you, you can come over whenever you want."

"And I've told you I don't drive! Mom and dad won't let me…no idea why, so I can only come when I can get a ride."

"I'm not going."

"Would you go if I came too?"

"No."

"Please? Kevin…you told me that when you found love to hold on to it, to fight for it…"

"Not if it cheats on you."

"Kevin, please…where are you and Joe meeting?"

"He'll be meeting thin air at the Starbucks near your house at 12."

"Kevin, you're coming." Nick's voice was stern, commanding him in a way that Kevin had never heard. "You're coming or I'm never speaking to you again and that's final."

"Nick, no, you can't do that to me!"

"I'll see you tomorrow or never again." Nick hung up and Kevin set the phone on the cradle. He walked to the couch and sat down with a sigh. He loved Nick, he couldn't lose his little brother, but he REALLY didn't think he could handle Joe. He sighed and pulled out his cell phone, not feeling like going to the home phone.

"Chris? It's me…"

"Baby, what's wrong? You sound messed up! Do you need me to come over?" The man on the other line sounded nervous.

"He called me Chris…" Kevin's voice was shaky and it was clear that he was on the verge of tears.

"How did he-"

"Nick caved."

"Wow…Kevin, I'm so sorry, what did he want?"

"He wants to see me."

"Don't let him!"

"Nick's blackmailing me…he said that if I don't go meet with Joe then he'll stop talking to me. Chris, I don't know what to do…"

"Stay where you are, I'm coming over." For the third time in the last 20 minutes, someone hung up on Kevin. Only three minutes later Chris buzzed up. Kevin pulled himself off of the couch and let him in. Kevin opened the door the second Chris knocked and Chris immediately pulled Kevin in to a hug. "Baby, god…" Chris kissed him passionately. "Are you alright?" Kevin shut the door and let Chris pull him over to the couch.

"No…" Kevin shook his head. Chris sat down on the far left of the couch and pulled Kevin beside him, guiding him into a lying down position.

"I'm so sorry…" Chris pulled Kevin's head into his lap and began to gently stroke his hair.

"It's not your fault…" A hot tear began to roll down Kevin's cheek. "It's his."

"I know, I just hate seeing you like this." Chris sighed. "God, Nick should know better, Joe broke your heart, you don't need to see him, it can't be good for you."

"But I need Nick to be there for me…"

"I know you do…" That was part of why Kevin loved Chris. He knew that he wasn't ever going to be the only person that Kevin needed and he didn't need to be. Kevin had met Chris a year ago after leaving an abusive relationship, and Chris had agreed to take things slowly. He was two years younger, just as Joe had been, but his level of maturity was unbelievable. "Look, if you want to go, I understand."

"But I don't want to go!"

"Do you want me to come with you?"

"Would you? I don't think that I could face him alone…I mean Nick said that he would go, but I'd feel a lot better if you did too…" Kevin looked up at Chris, quiet tears staining his cheeks.

"Of course I'll come Kevin." Chris pulled Kevin's lips up to meet his in a kiss. "You know I'd do anything for you."

"I love you…"

"I know, I love you too." Chris sighed. "I hate that he hurt you like this…"

"Chris, will you stay with me tonight? I'm sorry to be so lame, but I really didn't anticipate this happening."

"Kev, you're not being lame and you know I'll stay the night." Chris pushed Kevin off him and began to massage Kevin's shoulders gently. "Jesus, baby, you're really tense…" Chris worked his hands harder in to Kevin's shoulders, trying to loosen the knots.

"Blame Joe."

"I do."

"That feels good…"

"I know." Chris slid his hands under Kevin's shirt and continued the massage.

"I really didn't think that I'd ever love anyone else after him…" Kevin sighed. "Thank you for changing my mind." Kevin turned around and kissed Chris.

"Thanks for letting me in to your heart; when you first told me about your last two relationships I wasn't sure that you were going to."

"You promised me you'd never hurt me."

"And I never will."

"Thank you." Chris pulled Kevin in to his arms and held him on the couch, stroking his hair until he could fell Kevin's breathing slow. He picked Kevin up, carried him to bed and set him down. He wrapped his arms around Kevin and held him until they were both woken by the blaring of Kevin's alarm clock.

"Fuck…" Kevin groaned as he woke up.

"Go back to sleep," Chris whispered, turning off the alarm clock. "I'll make breakfast and wake you up in an hour, ok?"

"I love you…" Kevin sank back in to the pillow as Chris got up, kissing Kevin softly before getting up, grabbing a towel and going to shower. "What smells good?" Kevin wandered in to the kitchen about 45 minutes later.

"Pancakes and bacon, nothing special."

"Nothing special? You know that's my comfort food."

"Yeah…" Chris shrugged. "I thought that you might need it."

"Is there coffee?"

"Of course." Kevin made his way over to the coffee pot and poured himself a cup.

"I'm nervous…"

"I know." Chris abandoned the food for a second and walked over to Kevin, wrapping his arms around his boyfriend's waist.

"You're making this a lot easier…thank you."

"Anything for you…" The two boys ate breakfast, though Kevin mostly picked at his. On any other day, Chris would have worried about Kevin's lack of eating, he would have tried to coax Kevin in to eating more, but he understood the anxiety. Chris was nervous too. He was afraid of meeting Joe, but more importantly he was afraid of what seeing Joe again would do to Kevin.

"Does this look alright?" Kevin walked in to the living room and looked nervously at Chris.

"Kevin, you're beautiful, you could wear a paper bag and still look good." On any other day Chris would have made a crack about how he'd prefer Kevin in nothing but a paper bag, but he knew that this wasn't the right time for that.

"Should I change?"

"No." Chris shook his head. "You look like you."

"That's bad, I'm changing."

"NO!" Chris stood up and took Kevin's hand. "I like it when you look like you, you're gorgeous."

"You're sweet…" Kevin kissed Chris. "I just want to look good, you know…show him that I can do just fine without him…just fine with you."

"What he thinks doesn't matter…let's just go before he leaves and Nick never calls you again." Chris laced his fingers through Kevin's and led him from the apartment. They took Chris' car because Kevin's hands were shaking too hard to drive.

"I can't do this, he's actually here." Kevin turned as they reached the door, but Chris grabbed his hand, pulling him back around.

"Yes you can. Remember, I'm right here with you." Chris gave Kevin a quick kiss before pushing the door open. Joe saw them approaching and immediately stood up. Joe looked different. His skin was slightly darker and his hair, though roughly the same length, was styled differently. His features were a bit sharper than they had been and his style was different, loose, stylistically faded and ripped jeans, a plain black t-shirt and black converse. He looked good. Really good.

"I wasn't sure if you were going to come."

"Where's Nick? He said he was going to be here."

"I told him that if he didn't beat it I would tell mom what he was really doing at Logan's last night."

"Why would you do that? I wanted him to come."

"Well I wanted to talk to you alone…although that's not happening I guess, who's this?"

"I'm Chris." Chris held his right hand out to Joe, not letting go of Kevin's hand with his left.

"Joe." Joe's reply was quick, almost snappy.

"I'm gonna go get coffee, do you want anything baby?" Chris looked at Kevin.

"Yeah…" Kevin nodded. Chris knew what he liked.

"I'll be back soon." Chris leaned in and kissed Kevin on the cheek. "It'll be ok," he whispered before letting go of Kevin's hand and walking towards the semi-long line. Joe sat down and Kevin followed suit.

"Why are you with him?" Joe asked.

"Don't even go there," Kevin snapped. "I love him and if you even think about attacking him I'm out of here."

"I'm sorry, that's not what I meant…I was just wondering if you were happy with him."

"I am."

"I'm glad for you." Joe faked a smile, but Kevin saw through it.

"Why am I here Joe?"

"I missed you…" Joe sighed and fidgeted nervously.

"If you were going to miss me then why did you break me heart?"

"I was foolish…and young…"

"Yes you were, but that doesn't change what you did." Kevin looked angrily at Joe. "I almost killed myself Joe, I entered a relationship where I was abused every night just because I needed someone to tell me that they loved me."

"Oh my god…" Joe's voice softened and his eyes displayed concern. "Kevin, I'm so sorry…I didn't know…"

"Even if you did, what would you have done about it?" Kevin glared at Joe.

"Kevin, despite what it may seem like, I really care about you…"

"Save it Joe, I don't want your words and I don't want your sympathy." Luckily for Kevin, before he could get any more worked up, Chris came back. He sat down next to Kevin and handed him a grande coffee cup before casually sliding his arm around Kevin's shoulders, giving him a sense of security and comfort.

"Kevin…I don't really feel comfortable with him here…"

"Well he's not going anywhere, so you can say what you have to say in front of him."

"Fine then, I will." Joe took a deep breath. "Kevin, I'm still in love with you and I'm willing to do anything to get you back. I've spent too long regretting what I did to you and too long trying to figure out how to make up for it. The only thing left was to tell you how I felt, so this is it." Joe leaned across the table and kissed Kevin. For a split second, Kevin kissed him back, but then he pulled away, standing up and glaring.

"YOU HAD NO RIGHT TO DO THAT!" Kevin screamed. He pulled off the lid of his coffee cup and dumped its steaming contents in to Joe's lap. Then he turned at ran from the Starbucks. Chris rolled his eyes at Joe and chased after Kevin, who had only made it half a block before breaking down in sobs.

"Come on, let me take you home." Chris put his arm around Kevin and guided him towards the car.

"When did this all get so hard?" Kevin sobbed as Chris drove. "First it was supposed to be just me and him, forever…and now it was supposed to be you and me…but he had to come and fuck it all up!"

"It's gonna be alright." Chris soothed Kevin, resting one hand on his knee. The rest of the drive was filled with Kevin's sobs and Chris' words of comfort. When they got back to Kevin's apartment, Chris made him a cup of tea and they both sat down on the couch. "Kevin…" Chris sighed.

"What is it?"

"I don't think that we should see each other anymore." A tear rolled down his right cheek as he spoke the words.

"What? Chris, if this is about what Joe did it was nothing!" Kevin looked at him almost pleadingly. "Please, don't do this!"

"Look, Kevin, he still loves you, and it's obvious that you still love him." Chris tried to hold back his tears. "I love you Kevin, so much, and sometimes loving someone means letting them go. I love you enough to know that you'd be happier with someone else, with him…and it's not what I want, but it's what you need."

"But Chris…Chris, I love you." Kevin could feel more tears fall from his eyes, but he didn't even try to stop them.

"You may love me, and I believe that you do, but you can get over me, there's always going to be a part of you that still loves him and I want all of you to be happy, not just most of you." Chris was fully crying now and Kevin could see his heart was breaking. What pained him the most though, was that Chris was right.

"Can we be friends?" Kevin asked.

"I don't think so." Chris shook his head. "I would want to, but I don't think that it would work…"

"I won't forget you…" Kevin looked sadly at Chris. "I really do love you."

"I know you do." Chris nodded. "It's possible to love two people at once, you just love him more and that's no one's fault." He sniffled and stood up. "But I want you to forget me Kevin, because if you don't remember me you can focus on Joe." Kevin didn't understand how someone could do this, give up what he loved for what someone else needed.

"I don't want to forget you!"

"You have to." Chris took Kevin's hand and gave it a quick squeeze before opening the door and walking out. Kevin fell on to the couch, sobbing. This wasn't like when Joe had left him, because when Joe had hurt him it had been selfish. Chris had promised never to hurt Kevin and he had kept that promise, breaking his own heart before he dared dent Kevin's.

"Nick, everything's wrong…" Kevin sobbed in to the phone as Nick answered.

"Whoa, Kevin, what happened?"

"I love him and I hate him at the same time and now Chris is gone and I don't know what I'm supposed to do…can you get a ride over here?"

"Yeah, hold on, I'll be there in 15 minutes, don't do anything you're going to regret." Nick shuddered, thinking back to the last time that his brother had been dumped. Nick had gone to his apartment only to find that Kevin was passed out from attempting to overdose.

"I won't, just hurry."

"Like I said, 15 minutes." Nick sounded calm and sympathetic. "I'll take care of you Kev."

"I know…that's why I called."

"I'll see you soon." Nick hung up and Kevin remained where he was, curled up on the couch. Nick had a key and let himself in when he got there, rushing to Kevin's side. "Oh Kev…" He pulled his brother in to his arms. "Kevin, I'm so sorry…what happened?"

"Joe fucking kissed me and then Chris told me that I still loved Joe and that he needed to let me go so that I could be happy…"

"Was he right?"

"YES! That's the worst part!" Kevin sobbed in to Nick's shoulders. "I love him so much that it hurts Nick, I don't want to, but I do."

"Do you want to be with him?"

"Desperately, but I'm afraid that he's just going to hurt me again, and I don't think I could take that."

"I'm done hurting you Kev…" A soft voice spoke behind them, catching Kevin completely off guard. He looked up to see Joe looking at him, still wearing the coffee stained jeans.

"How did you-"

"How do you think I got here Kev? Mom and dad are at work…" Nick looked at Kevin, rubbing his brother's back.

"Kevin, can I please talk to you alone?" Joe looked pleadingly at his older brother.

"Fine," Kevin whispered softly. Nick stood up.

"I'll be outside if you need me." Nick left the room and Joe took his place on the couch next to Kevin.

"I'm serious Kevin, I've learned enough from my mistakes. I just want to be with you and love you. I'm sorry that I made Chris leave…but that selfish part of me is glad that he did…"

"That's a terrible thing to say Joe, his heart's broken."

"I know…" Joe sighed. "But I just gotta know Kevin, do I have a shot with you?"

"What do you mean?"

"Is there a chance that we're ever going to be together again? Or am I wishing on burnt out stars?"

"I'm not letting Chris' heart go to waste." Kevin leaned across the couch and kissed Joe softly on the cheek.

"I'm staying this time Kevin, I really am." Joe pulled Kevin in to a warm embrace. "No matter what happens I'll be right here with you…forever."

ONE YEAR AND 167 DAYS LATER

Kevin awoke to the sound of his phone ringing. He pulled himself from Joe's arms and answered it sleepily. "Hello?"

"Kevin, it's me…"

"What's up Nick?" Hearing Kevin on the phone, Joe woke up.

"Look…I have something that I need to talk to you about…"

"Shoot."

"Ok, so you know that I told you that there was this guy that I was interested in but I wouldn't tell you who because I wasn't sure if he felt the same way?"

"Yeah..."

"Well yesterday he asked me out and I really want to say yes, but I wanted to get your permission first because…well because it's Chris…"

"Chris McKinley?" Kevin was shocked.

"Yeah…"

"I didn't even know that you were still in touch with him!"

"I know…he told me not to tell you, he wanted to give you your space, but after you two broke up he and I started hanging out a lot and we sort of accidentally fell in love I guess…I think that's what this feeling is anyways…" Nick took a deep breath. "Look, if it's awkward for you, I swear to god I will turn him down."

"No." Kevin shook his head, not caring that Nick couldn't see him. "Go be in love Nick. He's really easy to love."

"I know…thank you Kevin."

"No problem." Kevin hung up and turned to Joe.

"What was that all about?"

"Chris."

"I thought you lost contact…"

"I did, but apparently Nick didn't." Kevin smiled and kissed Joe passionately. "Don't worry about, right now I just want to have a slow morning with you."

"I like the way you think." Joe wrapped his arms around Kevin and they sank back on the bed, glad that every loose end was finally tied up.