You and I

Warning : Shonen-ai. Please push the back button now if you don't like it.

Note : Twin. Set on Night Rikuo's mind.

From the first time I was born into this world, we're always together. Not once we ever apart, we were attached to each other. But as time passed, I can see that it began to change. Because of something invisible that has separated us as we aged.

Rikuo, you mean the world to me. I wasn't sure why, I just...do. Seeing you face always give me a warm feeling inside, yes, a happiness. Your hazelnut eyes and your brown hair just add to your perfection. I become very attached to you, but I know, that this is wrong. The society, both youkai or human wouldn't approved this.

So I held back. No matter how much it hurts. For us. ...No, you.

Now, you're surrounded by your friends. You were smiling. But not for me, not anymore. My heart ached…. Is this jealousy or maybe regret? I don't know for sure. Regret. Jealosy. Aa, which one?

Your smile, that used to make me happy were now hurting me.

Ironic, …But I've to accept that you're not mine alone. You've someone precious now. But… you.. Must you acted like I wasn't exist? Would you feel better if I disappeared? …or maybe you'll act like nothing happened, like that day. I shook my head, trying to stop my train of thought.

It will do me no good... no good.

I clung into a vain hope, that everything is alright, that nothing has changed.

But no—It was impossible, right?

There's no turning back the 'time'. No changes.

World just doesn't work that way.

My hand gripped tightly to a piece of paper.

I was walking around my room, at Nura's Clan place. And that's when I noticed a paper on the tatami and picked it.

I began to read that note. Soon, I was shocked. A sentence echoed in my head, my body trembled and I can't think clear. As there a fog covered the whole room, blinding me. But I tried to read that note to ensure.

"... Dear brother, I will leave this city...". First sentence and my head was beginning to throb. I continued," ...I will not return for several years. So, I will leave our beloved Nura's clan to you. Rikuo Nura". Right, .. My heart was beating so fast, I can't even believe what I just read. I can't let Rikuo leave, no way! I thought. Then I ran to search him. Hoping he had not go yet.

Whack! I collided with someone. 'Who is it?' I thought. I raised my head. It was my Grandfather!. "What are you doing here?. Are you not coming to the farewell party?" asked my grandfather. I can feel my heart was beating more fast.

"Fa-farewell party? For whom?" I asked. My voice was trembling.

"Well..." said my grandfather, he paused. "For your brother of course. Rikuo Nura" continued my grandfather. His answer made me more afraid. I can't bear see Rikuo leave.

Once again I ran. Leaving my grandfather behind. I started to search for Rikuo, everywhere. But strange, I didn't see him anywhere.

Did Rikuo leave already? I thought, making me more scared. I continued my search for Rikuo, in his school, park, everywhere. But somehow, I can't find him. I took one long breath to calm me down. Thinking about where he might go. I closed my eyes. Felt desperate and powerless.. I even think to give up. And suddenly, Kana appeared.

"Hey, good evening!" shouted Kana cheerfully.

"What do you want? Just go." I answered. I'm not in mood for chat or something, and she's making my mood even worse.

"Sheeshh! What's with that attitude? I just want to tell you that I saw Rikuo! Isn't it cool? To see him for the last time" She said, smiling. I was suprised, and asked her,"Really? Is Rikuo okay?". Feeling relieved that Rikuo didn't go yet.

Kana was silent for a moment and answered,"Well, he looked kinda strange.. though. And he mumbled something like going to a memorial place". Soon after I heard Kana words, I ran and leaving her behind.

I got a clue about where Rikuo went. And I went to some place that I think Rikuo will there. But now, it almost night. Everything was becoming more dark very quickly and my chance to find Rikuo was rapidly depleting.

It's the first time I can feel this helpless. Powerless. I can't do anything. Greeted4 the fact that my chance to find him was running low. I can feel my heart was beating so fast. Rikuo.. why do you always make me feel like this? Like that time, I remember. The situation was similar like this. Yes.. That old day...

-Flashback-

Sounds from bird that singing happily and a gentle breeze woke me up. I was standing near a forest. And there was Rikuo, my younger brother laughing happily under the sun.

"Onii-chan~" He shouted toward me. "Look! I found a flower. Isn't it beautiful?" He smiled. I smiled back to him and stroked his head. So cute and innocent, he played under the sunshine...a placed that I couldn't reach. But I didn't feel jealous, I feel happy. How he talked and smiled... always caught my attention.

"Uhm.. Onii-chan. Can I ask you something?" asked him toward me. He glanced at me nervously.

I smiled and replied, "Of course. What is it?". Patting his head again.

"Well, uhm..Can I go to that forest? Pleasee~". He stared at me. "Really please..." he continued.

I thought for a moment and answered his question,"No. Grandpa said we can't go there, remember?. It's dangerous, you can't go there."

Rikuo puffed his cheeks. Cute. "But Onii-channn..." he whined.

After that conversation, Rikuo and I went home. On the way home Rikuo was still pouting, but that's all. Then, something happened.

When night came, Rikuo disappeared. And I started to panic. Grandfather sent some of his youkai to search for Rikuo. But nobody found Rikuo. I ran into the forest calling Rikuo's name. I remembered what Rikuo said earlier about going into the forest.

And yes, I found Rikuo deep in the forest. His face full of with mud, and his body was wounded. He was lying on the ground. Rikuo did not move, making me panic. I thought he already died. But no... Rikuo was still breathing.

"Nii-chan? Is that you?" He tried to open his eyes.

Rikuo grinned, but I feel it was forced. He held a flower to my hand. "N-Nii-chan.. I..I got this flower for you.. Isn't it beautiful?".

His breathing getting more and more short. What he said made me feel thrilled and angry. He got hurt because of me. To took this flower. "Onii-chan,.." he gasped."This place,... will be our memorial place." Then he lost his consciousness.

-Flashback end-

... ... .. Wait! That's it! I know what Rikuo meant about memorial place. Is that forest we used and played together. A forest located near our house. I thought and ran to that place. Even so, with night already came, everything looked dark and blurry.

My hope was depleting fast. Not long, I arrived in that forest, exhausted. But I continued my search for Rikuo and I went deep and deeper into the forest.

More deeper I went into the forest, the situation around me became dark and darker. Very scary, almost like another world. I gazed on my surrounding when I saw something nearby. Shining on the dark.

I walked closer and closer toward that light. Strange, more I stared and moved closer to that light, everything around me became more bright and bright. When I arrived in front of that light, everything around me was shining faintly.

I noticed that the light came from a candle. Very beautiful and gentle light, I thought. When suddenly I heard someone coming. Closer and closer... walking toward me. And when that someone arrived in front of me, I held my breath.

It's Rikuo, my beloved twin brother. This gentle light made my surrounding... or this situation felt a little weird. Rikuo didn't look like his usual self.

Rikuo smiled gently and said,"Hello and welcome to this place". Then, he stared at me for a moment and continued, "I'm glad you finally find out about where I go, Nii-chan". The atmosphere of this place felt weird, and getting more weird when Rikuo appeared.

"What did you mean by that? That note! You said you will leave, and grandfather... Kana.." I said, surprised because of Rikuo appearance. But Rikuo just glanced at me.

"Yea, that note. And the others just part of my plan." Rikuo smiled.

"W-What? What plan?" I said, more surprised.

Rikuo stared toward me, making me felt a little nervous. "Nii-chan,.. Do you hate me?" He asked. I was shocked. I never think Rikuo will ask this kind of question. Never, even now.

"... No, I don't hate you" I said and looked away. I can't look into his eyes. It's the opposite, I thought but I didn't say it.

"Nii-chan.." Rikuo said. I can feel that he was staring at me. "Look at my eyes." Rikuo continued. Really, Rikuo felt different. He was more calm and it's make the atmosphere around tense. Still, I didn't look at his eyes.

"Nii-chan!" Rikuo shouted and.. I surrendered. An unknown power forced me to told everything as all that hold me to not say it disappeared.

Rikuo listened to my story. He looked a little shocked. And one last sentences I said to him made him didn't say anything. I..I told him about my feeling.. too.

"And... I actually love you," I said.. Then I continued "...I know it just make you confuse. But I.. ". I can feel my voice was trembling. I didn't even aware about what I said to him. All of my secret, and my feeling just came out. I scared that he will leave me after all of this, especially after he found his special someone. I can't bear to see his reaction. It just not like me, to be scared because of this thing.

But.. Rikuo laughed. Making me wonder why. I didn't think what I told him is funny. Seeing my expression, Rikuo stared at me, he was still laughing.

"Oh, Nii-chan.. So it just about that." he said to me. "If you worried about it, then I'll give you the solution. Close your eyes"

I obeyed and closed my eyes. And something warm and gentle touched my lips. I was suprised and opened my eyes hurriedly. I can see Rikuo smiling at me. D-Did he just kissed me? I thought.

My face turned red, damn... This's not like me at all! I wanted to said something, but I just can't. That k..that k-kiss was just to suprising for me.

"Nii-chan,"

"You do not have to worry about that thing. Because I will be with you forever, no matter what." Rikuo continued.

"What about her?" I asked. I remembered about her.

"Don't worry." Rikuo said as he kissed me again. Making I blushed more red than ever before. "I.. belonged to you, always. This kiss was the proof and my promise to you." Rikuo whispered.

"So, was your problem solved, Nii-chan?", Rikuo said, blushing.

I smiled gently to him, "Yes, it is. Thanks to you."

.

.

END

Fuh, at last, this story was finished!. Please tell me what are you think about this story ( sorry for OOC.. ) and about grammar error.. please forgive me. My grammar is bad.. very bad.. T_T. But I will try my best to improve it! FIGHT! -crazy mode on-

Oh yeah, Just want to ask something.. which is better between Kana and Tsurara? And tell me why too. ( To help me decide for the next story ). Thank youu~. Please reviews.