Redemption
Part 1: Unease
Sacrificing a life isn't worth the victory, yet I still did so, never looking back.
I gave my own life to destroy Grima, and disappeared from the lives of people I hold dear.
Who would have known that I would be reborn, even after dissolving into nothingness?
I am now a regular human living among others, hoping to enjoy this new found peace.
May it last forever.
High Deliverer Robin on the Dark Dragon War in his journal, accompanied with the following excerpt;
"As I write these thoughts in my journal I wonder to myself; could it be that I use too ornate language?"
"I can see Chrom", Robin told Morgan while gazing out from the window. Finally! Gods, I was almost starting to think that robbers got them, he thought. Then Robin shook his head. After all, there was no way that it could have happened, unless Chrom and Sumia had been ditching practice. Old habits die hard, and Robin could hardly see the two forgoing routine that had kept them alive during the greatest battle of the millennium.
He sighed. I have to get used to that now, he thought, calling that battle the greatest in a thousand years. After all, Black Dragon Grima had been destroyed. Robin had made sure of that.
"Father, is she with them?" Morgan asked, and Robin turned around to face her. His daughter had a book in her hands, and she was sitting next to the fireplace, her pose immaculately mirroring that of a court lady or even a queen. Lucina had been at her, Robin knew.
"She who?" he asked from her.
"Lucina", she answered curtly. Robin raised his eyebrows at her. Morgan usually called Lucina her mother.
"She's in the kitchen, no?" Robin said. The girl lifted her purple haired head from the book that she had been reading.
"No- I mean…" she started, and found herself trying to find words for whatever she was going to ask. Her fingers flailed softly, as if she was trying to find and capture the expressions that would help Robin better understand her question. Then she lifted her head higher, and met Robin's observant gaze.
"What I meant to ask is this; will little Lucina be coming here today?" she asked in a conversational and warm voice. It had a slight edge to it, Robin noted mentally.
"Ah, well, I didn't see anyone else than Chrom, but it is likely that she will. What kind of family get-together would this be without her?" he asked rhetorically. Morgan shifted uncomfortably in her seat. All the court lady's manners were starting to melt down like ice in the shade of a volcano. Why teach Morgan those habits, Lucina, if she's never going to be the queen, Robin thought. Sometimes she just didn't make any sense.
"See, Father…" Morgan said, "I read this one book some time ago. It had things about alternate dimensions and time traveling…" She looked at Robin's eyes apologetically; she looked slightly red around her cheeks, but Robin couldn't be sure. The concept would have been ridiculous, if not for the happenings three years past.
"Can you trust the source?" Robin asked her with a low voice. Unreliable information cost lives on battlefield, thus all facts had to be rigidly examined and inspected.
"I did some research, but there wasn't any information to be found. The book's writer seemed to be some sort of philosopher, rather than a scientist", she answered. Robin nodded, urging her to continue.
"The writer states, that if ever somebody came from the future, she could possibly…" Morgan's words had apparently gotten stuck into her throat, as she let out one ragged cough before continuing her speech. "…erase herself from existence at a later date by meeting her younger self." She was pursing her lips together, and Robin was thinking of telling her about it. Then he decided not to, as one could certainly see why this matter troubled Morgan so. Robin himself had done some research on it - in the name of necessity, as Robin didn't want his wife to suddenly just disappear - but all accounts – true or false, he couldn't say – were conflicting and borderline mad. Besides, such things would always be just theories, unless proven right. And that was very unlikely to happen.
"Morgan, your mother hasn't gone anywhere", Robin said to his daughter soothingly. "She's here, and will always be."
"But what if she starts to… unravel or something, when she meets little Lucina?" Morgan asked, more frantic than before. She's given this much thought, Robin thought. Then again, Morgan was also prone to overthinking. That was the sole reason Robin could still best her at games that demanded the ability to think analytically.
"Such a thing won't happen, Morgan. It won't", Robin reassured her. "Now quick, your grandfather was coming up the stairs last time I checked. They'll be here in any moment now" he said to Morgan and shooed her towards the kitchen with wavy arm motions. She scurried there, while Robin walked towards the bulky oak door that looked like it had seen its share of war. Gashes that seemed like they were made with an axe ran across it, but it seemed that the door had held, whoever the attacked had been.
Robin had only seen tall Chrom's muscular body from a distance, but he was sure that others would quickly follow. Indeed, just as he touched the doorknob dull pounding sounded from the other side of the door.
"Just a minute", he shouted and glanced quickly behind himself, making sure that nothing was out of order or just being plainly irritating. Sure enough, Morgan's book lay there on the table, its black leather bindings sticking out like a black magic tome. He took it, and ran quickly into the kitchen. Morgan was there with Luciana, readying the plates and all kinds of utensils for incoming guests.
"I didn't hear you open the door, Robin", Lucina said to him. She was as sharp as her sword Falchion, but her glory was of other kind. She was beautiful beyond measure, and sometimes she shone brighter than even the moon. At least in Robin's eyes. He took always care to never say something so cliché to his wife. Gods knew that she had a temper. She even pulled her sword on Robin once, but that was a long time ago. He had resolved to forget that.
"Just a moment, Lu", Robin answered to her. "Morgan, take your book back to your room." The girl grabbed it, and rushed upstairs to where her room was.
"Don't leave me hanging, Robin", familiar voice sounded from behind the oaken door that led outside. "And I hope you people didn't move away. You can't avoid family get-togethers by doing that, you know." The voice sounded more than little playful.
Robin dashed to the door. "Oh I wouldn't…" he said while opening the door, "miss this for all of Plegia's treasure, Chrom."
The man stood almost immediately behind door, and Sumia - who was carrying a little child that was presumably younger Cynthia, judging from the color of her hair – slightly further back with the couple's more grown up daughters. Older Cynthia waved happily from Sumia's left side, while young Lucina held tightly to her father's cloak. She looked adorable, little thing that she was, very much unlike her older counterpart. She was not like Robin's wife, except perhaps for her deep blue eyes. It all felt a bit too unnatural to Robin, who was accustomed to seeing his wife daily.
A question rose up to the surface of Robin's mind.
"Has Cynthia been in contact with her younger self lately, or at all?" he asked. It was a direct question - one that felt hardly appropriate as a greeting - but having the answer would ease Morgan's fears immensely. Chrom seemed puzzled at his question, but Sumia was quick to answer. "She sometimes holds the little one."
There. That was inspecting, examining, and verifying the source to make sure there was no false information. If Morgan learned that, she could become a great strategist. Then again, all prayers that went upwards nowadays were requests for tranquil and peaceful life. And wasn't an unemployed strategist always a good thing?
Then again, that was all that Robin was; a person whose only skill was to wage war. He could make supplies last for five hundred thousand people if situation demanded it, but tactician wondered if he could truly become a regular villager; perhaps a farmhand or a worker in a mill. Just like normal people.
But you are married into royalty. That wasn't a mistake; he would never say it was a mistake to marry Lucina. Even if it was done during a harrowing campaign against all kind of military threat he would never regret it. And besides, Robin knew one thing for sure. He would become a farmhand if needed or a worker in a mill if his family's financial situation plummeted. He'd have to, since Lucina renounced her claim on throne in favor of her younger self. But that didn't matter. Robin was still content, because she was there.
"I think you think too much, my friend", Chrom said, and he was right. Somehow, he always knew.
Robin shuddered almost unperceivably.
What would Chrom say when he heard the news?
"All's ready", Robin said quickly, showing the way inside. He stood at the door, as womenfolk clattered in. Chrom, however, wasn't out of quips. "It ought to be, it's Lucina we are talking about", he said smirking.
"Oh, so you would give me no thanks for tactical prowess in the kitchen?" Robin retorted, and Chrom snorted.
"I am curious to know how you apply your skills as a tactician in there" he said, striking conversation like the old times, when Robin still had his habit to announce big daring plans that were oftentimes as dangerous as marrying a Feroxi woman.
"I put things to their places. Lucina makes better food if spices aren't all mixed up", Robin answered, and Chrom laughed genuinely. Robin was once again amazed by his sincere look at life. When Chrom laughed, he laughed genuinely, and when he was sorrowful, he let it show on his face. People who played no tricks were much more enjoyable to be about, even as a tactician. That sentiment didn't extend to Robin's daughter, however. He loved Morgan very dearly, no matter how many tricks she would try to play on him.
Chrom's laughter quelled in time, but he had still to go into the house.
"Robin, are you sure that you are happy here?" he asked. Robin thought about his question.
"I have a lovely wife and a daughter that is a tactical genius. What more could I ask for, Chrom?" Moment of silence filled the emptiness that was created by a gap in their conversation. Robin was about to steer the former prince in by his shoulders when Chrom started speaking, his voice clear and almost somber.
"Then what is it that ails you, my friend? Share your load", he said, holding the door only slightly open now, probably to stop the conversation from being heard.
"I'll share it in the evening" Robin promised, but suspected that Chrom would request for an immediate answer. Robin found himself corrected, as Chrom simply nodded.
"However, you have to announce that thing to all of us, as you are in the midst of friends", Chrom said to him. "We two, we are even tied by blood nowadays." Robin nodded curtly, thinking of Lucina, and how awkward it had been to tell Chrom about their relationship. It wasn't easy when you married your best friend's daughter, even if she was from the future and three fourths of his age.
Robin peered down from the hill, observing a small village short distance away from them.
Where are Lissa and Lon'qu, he wondered silently. Chrom answered Robin's question before he could even voice it.
"They are coming. Just wait a while; it isn't easy journey from Regna Ferox nowadays. Roads in between the nations have been plagued with bandits, and we are having hard time keeping them under control."
"Have you not recruited any new troops?"
"We do not have enough experienced military commanders to take care of their training. Then there's logistics", Chrom said and sighed loudly. "Harvest was barely enough this year, and it reflects in food prices as well as the pay we can afford to give to our soldiers." Worry threatened already to slump the new exalt, and Robin shook his head mentally. That won't do.
He slapped Chrom's shoulder. "This isn't a time for worry, Chrom. Besides, I've got news." Robin smiled. "Can you guess what it's about?" he asked, gesturing Chrom to step into the house.
"I'd rather you told me", Chrom said walking through the doorway. Robin followed him inside, and homely brown greeted them in form of warm looking rugs. There was no fire in the fireplace, but nonetheless the air was very warm. It was late summer now.
"It is easier to show than tell", Robin told him. Then he proceeded to shout; "Lucina, your father is here!"
Silent steps came from the kitchen's direction. They were still soldier's steps, and perhaps that wouldn't ever change. But peace was here, at last. And so is she, Robin thought while looking upon his wife's countenance, as she appeared from behind the wall that separated the rooms. Lucina had taken off her apron, and regular cotton clothes - colored with boring brown – were all that she had.
It was almost like she had let go of everything that could have once made her the ruler of Ylisse, but even still, Lucina was a beautiful sight. She stood there for a moment, discerning and proud.
"Father!" she said, and took two careful steps towards Chrom. The exalt however had no such limitations. He ran to his beloved daughter grabbing her into a firm hug, minding her belly.
"Lucina", he said voice longing and missing. Sumia walked to them and joined their huddle. The joy of reunion was very sweet, and air was full of mirth, even with an occasional tear here and there. Or a proverbial flood, when it came to Sumia, but none of them minded it. They were happy to see each other again.
Robin waited patiently; it wasn't like they wouldn't ever let go of his wife. And indeed, after a moment that had felt like piece of eternity Chrom and Sumia let go of their daughter and took a couple steps back. Both of them looked at the next important thing, Lucina's round stomach. Sumia laid her hands on it.
"Have you yet decided whether it is fine for the younger Morgan to call older one her big sister?" She asked Lucina. Robin's wife pursed her lips ever so slightly, a gesture invisible to others than her family.
"Morgan was very adamant about changing her name so that little Morgan could be called with her true name. It took a lot of convincing on Robin's part to make her give up on that plan", she told her parents. "I guess Morgan feels like she's losing her identity as our child."
"Marrying her off won't solve the problem", Chrom said to them. Then he added; "I wouldn't be able to see my grandchild if that happens." Cynthia came flailing around, excited to pat Lucina's round belly, and they talked about things until two things happened, both at the same time. A shout came from the staircase, and another from the oaken door. Well, truthfully, it was two shouts from the door, and some silent grumbling added on top of it.
"Grandpa, Grandma!" "Brother!" "The hero enters!"
There are never enough reunions for one day, Robin thought. They are so full of life.
But inside something gnawed at him, and did not let Robin grasp that joy again.
Some time had passed while dining, and they had exchanged news each from their part of the world. Owain had the most to tell, as he had been traveling on his hero's journey for three years now. It was only because of Cynthia that Lissa had been able to contact them about the family get-together. She had a keen eye for messengers, partly because that was demanded of pegasus riders, and also because she had her mother's eyes which saw far and were accurate.
Lon'qu sat silently in the corner of the table, observing the conversation, never interfering. Robin wondered if he was like this at home, too. Then again, they had trained together for a while, and he had come to know Lon'qu as highly reasonable fellow, with keen eye for swordsmanship and even profound tactical understanding. For what was swordsmanship, if not a series of quick tactical decisions?
Lissa was sitting right next to her husband speaking with enthusiasm. Robin was happy to see that her liveliness hadn't disappeared anywhere in cold Feroxian weather. She did seem somewhat harder, he observed, but seemed to keep the core of her persona well intact. Even at the moment she was telling about the duel Lon'qu had with Basilio, laying out embellished details of its course.
"Guess who won?" Lissa asked them all, but her proud smile revealed the truth. Onto the cue, all people sitting around the table said Lon'qu without any shred of doubt. "You're no fun", Lissa said puffing her cheeks.
"It was about time, Basilio was getting old", Chrom marked.
"Don't speak of him like that, exalt", Lon'qu said grimly. Chrom threw his arms up in sign of surrender, and Lissa touched Lon'qu's hand gently. It seemed to Robin that Lon'qu was able to relax considerably.
"Doesn't this mean that we have two rulers in our humble table?" Morgan asked playing surprise. Robin thought about it for a moment. It did certainly feel like an honor, but Robin would never mention it to the two in question. That would lead to awkwardness, and he wanted none of that between them, between friends. Even if it meant that he was latching to an illusion.
"Just make sure you don't throw any dishes at them", Robin said to his daughter sarcastically. She rolled her eyes, but said no remarks to her father.
"Hasn't anyone noticed the inherent danger in this?" Lucina asked of them. A short silence was cut down by Chrom's question.
"What do you mean Lucina?"
"If royal families of Regna Ferox and Ylisse start marrying each other won't each country's populace be troubled by it? What if they fear that our kingdoms become one at some point of time?" Robin knew better than to correct his wife, and so decided to wait if somebody else knew the answer to her questions.
"Lucina, royal families of the world marry their daughters and sons to each other often, or can you foresee that not happening in the future?" Chrom asked her, his face a metaphorical question mark.
"I simply cannot see how people would accept it", Lucina said bluntly.
"Regna Ferox is ruled by the law of the strongest", Lissa said to her niece. "If there is a new strong person, their leadership changes, and there is no royal family in Regna Ferox anymore." Then she glanced at Lon'qu, and added; "But that won't happen anytime soon." She flashed Lon'qu one of her smiles. Interestingly, it seemed that the gruff man's facial expression softened considerably. Robin wondered about the change in Lon'qu's countenance. He looks much more comfortable around her. No, he looks comfortable because she's there.
"I wouldn't even call it a royal family in Regna Ferox's case", Robin interjected quickly, noticing that he had drifted off thinking once again. "Just West-Khan and his family", he added. Lucina thought about his words for a while. Then she frowned.
"I can see how people of Regna Ferox wouldn't be affected by this, but what about Ylisseans? Surely they would have problems with their preconceptions of 'northern barbarians'."
"Actually, no", Chrom said. "They seem to be rather happy about the alliance with Regna Ferox. They know that northern allies helped in the war against Plegia. Rather than worry, they would like things to stay just as they are now, with Regna Ferox's people guarding our back." He said it with such assurance that Robin was starting to wonder whether Chrom still nurtured his habit of walking amongst the people, listening to their worries and fears. It seemed likely.
On his right side Lucina nodded, satisfied by his father's answer. Frown disappeared quickly from her forehead, and was replaced with smile as she started conversing with Cynthia and Owain. They shared tales of travels across the world, trying to become heroes of legend while disregarding the fact that they had actually been fighting in Black Dragon War. Robin always thought that everyone who risked their life in that war was a hero, whether he was young, old, weak or strong. Besides, weakest persons usually became the strongest, once they conquered their own fears. But do those who were strong men in the beginning then become weak, Robin asked himself. He couldn't tell.
It was finally time for the desserts, and Morgan helped her mother to set the table. Soon different exquisite-looking dishes enraptured all of the eyes around the table; moist, succulent cakes and fruits of the season as well as snacks of different kind filled the table. All of this, and cooled wine, made it seem perfect in the eyes of its viewers.
Robin was as amazed as everyone else. He rubbed his eyes, but the beautiful sight did not disappear.
"Thank the gods that I was born into this world", Cynthia said, her eyes a glassy glaze. Lucina smiled to her sister. Chrom was still trying to decide whether he was dreaming or not. Lon'qu looked simply awestruck, and he wasn't one for sweet things. After a while everyone was able to define this thing – with much discussion and consideration – as a part of reality, and they started to devour everything that was set in front of them.
Many interesting discussions took place, from possible husbands for little Lucina to thoughts on pieces of art that Morgana had filled the wooden walls with. All in all, it was a good time.
Suddenly a high pitched clang sounded through the room. Everyone was stopped in their tracks, all conversations cut down, dead. One by one people turned to the source of the sound. It had been Chrom, who was presently holding spoon and a glass. He held silent for a while, and everyone waited patiently.
Then Chrom spoke, his voice serious yet calm.
"Everyone, Robin has promised to tell something to us all today", he said. "I do not know what it is about, but…"
Chrom's words quieted down for an effect. The room became very silent, and there was a tension forming up around the words that were going to be said aloud.
"But somehow I get the feeling that he will soon disappear from our lives."
Confused voices filled the table. They turned to look at Robin, who was appalled by their attention.
He couldn't have known it! He himself said he didn't know about it,Robin shouted mentally. He was smitten. But somehow he must have sensed it. He could always guess my thoughts, after all.
Time almost stopped for Robin. He feared that his voice might break. That tears would flood the table.
"It is your turn now, friend", Chrom said to him, his face uneasy and troubled
Gods, Robin shouted in his mind. Nervousness started to well up inside him.
He wasn't really afraid of speaking in general...
But he was terrified of speaking the truth to the certain person he had come to love dearly as a friend.
Is there really no other choice? Do I have to tell him? Lucina knows, but… how will Chrom take it?