"Fuck the system. Fuck everything. Fuck it."
1975 a particularly cold September
Lily was always pretty high strung underneath her calm exterior. Brain whizzing like an unhinged machine trying to catch up with itself in turbo-time, the mechanics of that life were steeped in unknowns and what-if's, like walls decked in needles and round corners are knives. It was due to her analytical nature, no doubt. There was just no way around it, mind just kept hammering on, and right now in the throes of revenge it only made more sense. She'd been sat for an hour now watching and listening and waiting. Salivating like a dog and grinning to herself as she acted out the plan in her mind.
Her friends however held not nearly the same amount of enthusiasm, barely paying attention to what was going on. Marlene was actually knuckle deep in her own nose, perched just behind the other girl, taking an advantage of her own from the secretive position lily had chosen. Lou on the other hand just seemed bored, she'd been walking around in circles kicking the grass and complaining since they'd got there, agitating lily to almost breaking point over getting caught, but was it really more important than going to hogsmede and enjoying her weekend like all the other students? She thought not, and that was enough to have her sulking and muttering for days.
Although lily was a "perfect" prefect, Lou knew she wouldn't actually deduct points no matter how many times she held it over them like some kind of uptight, anal, Lord; "You're gunna' be late for breakfast, get up or I'll start taking away points" were the words that had woken her every morning for two years now to be fair, so the threat had almost become a challenge in many ways, to see if she'd actually do it.
"Merlin, lily, it's been an hour now of you just bloody gawking, how much more of this are we going to have to suffer?" Lou had quickly glanced at her watch, something she regretted as soon as she did, crossing her arms and continuing to trudge a muddy dent into the grass while huffing out annoyed breaths with the little energy she had for the situation.
"Will you shut your mouth! It's only half past they'll be coming any minute how" the girl hissed back.
"You sure this'll work, lils?" Marlene said, mid yawn.
"That's a fair point, have you actually thought this through?"
"Of course I have! The potion was made perfectly and it's all set up exactly right, it's going to bloody work! Now will you get back, sit your arse down and shut up, please"
Lou rolled her eyes and grumbled before finally tumbling onto the ground, deciding instead to lie on her back and look up at the sky through the branches of the birch tree they were sat up against.
"Give it a rest would you, you're not a teacher y'know" she sighed
"Not yet" Marlene added, in a dry tone. "I am freezing my tits of though, my hands are like icicles"
"Yeah, that'll be the snot" Lou jabbed, earning a kick "Oi!"
"But seriously, lily, we've been out here for ages don't you think they'd of got here by now?"
"But they said yesterday, by the lake at two, you herd them! They must just be running late or something"
"Or maybe it's a sign" Lou said in fain dramatic tone, a half hearted impression of their divination teacher, Professor Stubbs.
"Oh shut up! Just because you play quidditch with them you think what they do is fine! Well I'm sorry but some of us actually want to stand up for what's right!" lily really had had enough by this point, her own voice finally raising from the hushed, angry whisper it had taken on for the past hour,
"I'm sorry, but since when is wanting to have a relaxing butterbeer instead of sitting about in the cold a crime? And it's not as if covering Potter in Pinkity Pandemonium is really the definition of 'justice' anyway, it wont stop them just like detention wouldn't, who even cares? Marls can we please go to the broomsticks now?"
Both girls made to stand, brushing he dirt off of themselves, "Sorry, Lils, gotta' bounce-" Marlene added, although she was quite happy to trade her current soroundings for the warm and welcoming Three Broomsticks before too much of the day had passed, but before they could begin their walk a familiar sounding bark of laughter cut through the air and hit their ears with a start.
"I told you! I told you!" Lily was practically singing to herself in a hushed tone while the voices came closer, dragging the other girls back down by their coats so all three of them would be hidden from sight .
Lou knew that laugh anywhere, it belonged to Sirius black, and she also knew that wherever he was James Potter was guaranteed to be nearby. She'd almost been hoping they'd not show up, actually scratch that, she'd definitely been hoping they wouldn't. Just to spite lily and her obsession with 'getting them back at their own game', even the fact that she'd let herself get dragged into the fiasco was a heavy-weighted regret, although in the beginning she'd simply been curious as to how it would actually be pulled off she should have known how it would go with lily's forte for meticulous planning and an over-the-top hatred for everything potter.
Lily was beside herself with excitement now, rubbing her mittened hands together like some criminal goblin about to finally get their hands on golden treasure. The boys, three figures they could see now, were clear as day and it was obvious that James potter was definitely among them.
"You look like a mad goblin, y'know that" Lou mused, giggling at her friend, but was met instantly with a harsh "shhhhhh!" And a strong look and so for lack of anything better to do she moved and peaked her head round the tree as Marlene was, looking over to where the boys were bounding ignorantly along the path towards them.
Sirius was still laughing, louder than the rest, him and james practically arm in arm with how close they were and having what seemed to be a greatly amusing and animated conversation. A shorter stouter frame was hurrying clumsily behind them, struggling to keep up.
"Come on wormy! Chop chop!" Lou even heard potter call back at him and rolled her eyes inwardly at how much of a ponce he could be. Honestly, maybe it wouldn't be so bad seeing him all turned pink. If they even pulled it off. They even had a transfiguration assessment on Monday he couldn't miss and there was no doubt the look on McGonagall's face would definitely be worth it.
"... but mate, mate listen they wouldn't even know we'd been there, there's no way, it'd be the perfect crime..." they were even close enough now that they could hear the conversation, meaning they must be nearly under the trap they'd set up.
"Ready?" Lily whispered gleefully to the other two girls beside her. Lou and Marlene looked at each other, after everything they had to admit they too were feeling the adrenaline of the plan now, but still nothing compared to lily practically dancing with excitement next to them.
Lou shrugged at her as if to say 'We might as well' and so Marlene turned and gave a curt nod, and so it was. The tree of them raised her wands carefully, looking up into the branches of the other tree just ahead and the cauldron balanced in them. Taking a deep breath to calm down.
All together the three of them quietly muttered the incantation they'd memorised, with Marlene following what lily had written on her hand earlier,
"You can be fiery in fuchsia,
majestic in magenta,
Or all round rosey
In romantic rouge,
So forget all the humdrum,
If looking disastrous and glum,
We'll turn you all pretty,
pinky, party, plum."
Once it was over they could see the surface of the cauldron bubbling a radiant pink, little sparkles of pink glitter already falling to the ground below, but the boys seemed too caught up in their own conversation to notice. Then it was up to lily herself, trying to stop herself from shaking with excitement, to finish the job.
"... Wingardium leviosa" with one tiny movement of her wand the potion hovered upwards and then came crashing down in perfect time, covering all but one of the three boys in the bright pink magical liquid.
While the girls gave away their position almost immediately with their howls of laughter, Sirius and James seemed to be in some kind of shock as to what had just occurred, while the third figure, their friend peter petittigrew was only just catching up to them and the cloud of sparkling pink in the air.
"W-Wuut happened to you?" The shorter boy finally said, dumbly pointing at the two. Sirius simply looked at him like he was a bloody idiot while the other victim next to him was wiping his glasses as to look in the direction of the rather loud culprits.
"Is- Is that Evans?" James finally asked, causing his best friend to spin on his heal and squint in the same direction, "it is, Sirius, it's Evans" he finished, dumbfounded. Stupidly the boys initial instinct was of course to mess up his hair, in the way he always did as if it made him look cool, but all that did was remind him of his current state.
Here he was, standing in front of the girl of his dreams, dyed head to toe bright pink.
He'd know the smell of the potion anywhere: in their 2nd year they'd used it in remus's plan to dye every slytherin's robes bring pink instead of green and again in their 4th in one of the more annoying defence against the dark arts teacher's shampoo bottles. Undoubtedly they'd used it more during their time as-well, it was always a good laugh, but never, ever ever, had such a prank ever been pulled on the marauders themselves.
"What the fuck!?" Sirius had his wand out on instinct the minute he knew something was wrong and was now pointing it ahead of him clutched in his radiantly rosy hued hand, while his best mate beside him had seized up from embarrassment; a new and unwanted feeling.
The, now pink haired, teenager fired the first hex he could think of right in the direction of the three girls. Instead of doing any damage however the spell simply hit the tree they'd been hiding behind, breaking off a branch.
"Oh don't be such a baby, black" came the voice of earlier named ginger, still clutching her stomach from the many laughs.
Sirius's nostrils practically doubled in size after that comment.
"Who knew the great Sirius black could pull off hot pink?" Was the next jab, coming from the girl he recognised as lousinda Montgomery, feeling the stab of embarrassment hit his ego.
The other two girls had burst into fits again, rolling around on the ground. He had to pull himself together,
"Fuck you!" This only made Lou laugh more, seeing him expressing what was only comparable to a toddler tantrum. Sirius black was usually a man of many words and witty wisdom but now all he could manage was collection of angry grunts and whines and jumbled swear words while he resorted to desperately trying to rub himself clean with the ends of his sleeves.
"How the hell do I get this off?!" He shouted, back at potter who just stared at him with fear in his eyes and grimaced.
"You seriously don't know? Ha ha!" Came the voice of lily Evans. All three girls were looking between the two teenage boys in utter disbelief, rolling their heads back in more laughter when they just seemed to gulp back in response.
"Well, serves you right after what you did to those first years! And for last week!" Lily had her hands on her hips and was now talking directly to potter who still stood some feet away opening and closing his mouth like a confused and frightened fish, not knowing what to say.
Lou had never seen either of them lost for words before, the sight was quite something. she was used to hearing the potter go on loudly for hours to no end about practically anything and having to endure it, anytime he was even in the same room you'd over hear him, arrogant as always. He was alright though really, she knew him well enough to get that and did feel a tiny pang of guilt seeing him so broken, but again that rather luminescent shade of pink really seemed to make up for it.
"Fuck! Mate, please at least tell me I'm not as pink as you are?" Sirius had given up now crying to remember how to fix it.
"I'd say you're both quite a nice even bubble gum colour, what'd you think?" Marlene responded, crossing her arms and looking to the other two girls.
"I dunno, I think Sirius here might be more of a vibrant fuchsia" Lou mused, stroking an imaginary beard in a thoughtful manner. The pair burst into hysterics again when the boy's eyes widened to the size of goblets.
"Uuuh mate, um we should uh get back yknow maybe uhhhh quickly" james stuttered at shallow volume, snapped out of his daze when he noticed a group of cooler 7th years coming towards them.
"He speaks!" Lily called, with Marlene giving a comedic round of applause and lou still rolling around with tears coming out her eyes.
"Oh piss off!" Sirius shouted as he backed away but all he got in response was another fit of ruckus laughter as the girls all witnessed his eyebrows finally turn a vibrant shade of reddish purple.
"Mate!" James called with a bit more urgency.
The two retreating puddles of pink hurried off into the distance with a confused peter still stumbling behind, shouting out for them to wait for him only gaining more attention. Leaving the girls still trying, and failing, to contain their laughter.
Later in the day news spread quickly, the two boys covered head toe and the story of how it happened causing endless amusement all over the castle, the two of them hadn't even turned up to dinner.
"I told you it'd be good! Oh my god, the look on his arrogant face!" Lily had just finished telling the rest of griffindor house the whole story, appropriately exaggerated in her excitement.
"Watch out, anyone listening would never believe you were a prefect" Marlene mocked with a large grin on her face looking over the table at her friend.
"Ah! Fuck the system. Fuck everything. Fuck it. I feel great!" Lily exclaimed, basking in her rare moment of teen rebellion.
Looking over Lou even noticed Remus lupin laughing to himself, despite being best mates with the newly, painfully hot-pink pair.
"- We did break about a thousand school rules though" she heard the red-head add.
"Oh come on! It was hilarious, they deserved it, you were right, be happy!" Lou could never believe how fast Lily Evans could change her mind about something.
"No, you're right, it's not as if they've not done much worse and gotten away with it..." the girl was still slightly put out.
"Im sorry I ever doubted you, lils -" Lou offered up to make her feel a little better about it.
"you should be" lily said instantly.
"- your plan was a roaring success!"
Marlene grinning beside her raised her glass, "To lily, for turning potter and black bright pink!" She exclaimed, a good ten people around them joining her in the toast.
Lily was beaming again, feeling quite proud of herself.
"Well, you know, you guys helped"
"That is true, we did help" Marlene smiled, "anyway pass the mint sauce."
They all continued to tuck in to the Saturday feast, Lou catching out the corner of her eye as Remus tried to sneak a whole steak pie into the pocket of his robes.
Fifth year really was going to be something else.
authors note: new story, not sure if people are still using this site as much as back in the day but thought i would upload anyway - full disclaimer, things will probably be pretty slow burn for a while but don't worry it will pick up!