Happy Singles Awareness Day, aka Valentines Day, which ever you prefer. The only chocolate I got was when a boy who I don't know started throwing chocolate to the world in general, and one landed on my lap. Sad, ne? Well, anyway, I wrote this in roughly less than two hours, so I really hope you like it. It's not really a lemon, but it's definetly M.

Naruto snarled angrily to himself as he caught sight of the calendar and the stupid girls wall. The date was, predictably, circled with red, large hearts decorating it artistically. Dammit!! Of all the stupid goddamm place that he had to be today of all places, guarding a spoiled princess was at the very bottom of his list.

Being with his boyfriend of five months was at the top. But noooo, ninja's had no social life, and he was, apparently, a ninja first, and a person second. Or fourth, apparently he was also a f-cking purse and arm toy before that.

The pink-clad blonde next to him smiled benevolently at nothing as he was dragged along, carrying all her chocolates and other pink lace covered items. Unknown to him, before now anyway, a princess must have a body-guard on Valentines day, to pose as a boyfriend and stop any misguided jealousy and/or spurned-lover attacks. What he was more surprised that there was actually a need for such a thing. He couldn't think of anything less appealing than the girl who was draping herself all over him.

And, of course, it had to be a foreign nin so as not to arouse either suspicion as to why she was screwing a guard (Naruto's terms, not hers) and also to avoid guardsmen vying for the throne themselves, or the princess herself, for that matter. So Naruto had been chosen, because he was male, hot, uninterested in power struggles (other than Hokage, but the employers didn't know that) and he was apparently her 'type' so she could reasonably be believed to actually be dating him.

But Naruto wanted to spend time with his Sasuke. But now Sasuke would be alone with his fangirls, who seemed to gain some sort of subhuman powers on this day, and even Sasuke could not escape them for long. This was supposed to be their first Valentines day together, and even though Sasuke cared less about that then Naruto did, he had been willing to do something romantic to please his boyfriend. Not to mention, they had made plans for that night. And by plans, he meant Plans. And now, because of this girl, he couldn't.

"Naaarruuutoooo." Ashley carolled.

"Yes." he gritted, forcing a smile through his urdge to strangle her.

"Remember how I told you about that guy I like? Damian."

He didn't "Yes."

"Well, he's right over there." she chirped. "And he's watching us. Sooooo, I want you to kiss me." She gave what she thought was a cute pout. He briefly considered homicide. No, to many guards. Then suicide. No, he still had Plans, postponed though they were. He did so, focussing on pretending that her hair was dark, her features masculine, and her lips not so damn fruity!!

It failed. He endured as best he could, counting to thirty, and pointedly ignoring her tongue. At thirty (well, 28) he finally pulled away, doing his best to look blown away, and not like he had just survived torture. At least Sasuke had to be fairing better than him. And if not, Naruto had sent Sasuke a card of his own, making sure that it made Sasuke's Valentines day into one he would never forget.

Sasuke was running for his life. He had only barely managed to have his clothes forcibly ripped from his body, and he was going to the last place he ever wanted to go for safety. Sakura. However, she was intelligent, she was stubborn, she was female, and she was not single. A perfect ally.

Apparently, she had sensed one desperate Uchiha chakra followed by lusting Fangirl chakra is masses heading her way, so she was waiting. Being the team mate of Konoha's two hottest ninja's had it's benefits. She held the door open for him, and slammed it closed behind him, fortifying it with chakra.

"Hi." she greeted, as if there were not a passionate mob outside her door. "I wondered when you'd show. I already have an escape plans for you, since I do have a life that doesn't revolve around you."

Sasuke panted in response, allowing her to continue.

"See, all you have to do is send a clone in some opposite direction, and then poof to your house. But then Naruto and I realized that it would only last so long as no one touched it. So he made one himself, and poured enough chakra in it for ten of his bushin clones. He said it's not like he needs it. I think he just doesn't want you surrounded by girls, but that's just how he is. Now, poof away, and I'll send it out in a few minutes."

Sasuke nodded once in gratitude, about to perform the aforementioned poof, when Sakura caught his arm.

"I almost forgot. Naruto told me to give you this. I don't know what it is, though, so you'll have to tell me later." she winked. "Now go, I have lunch in an hour!!"

Sasuke rolled his eyes, girls and their dressing. "Thanks Sakura." he said as the room faded into his own. Tossing himself onto his bed in frustration, he examined the vanilla envelope in his hand, curious as to why he could feel it giving off waves of chakra. Shrugging, he flipped it open, blinking at the simple words inside.

Bird-tiger-ox-hare-drgon-ox-rat-monkey-ram-hare-dragon-bird-tiger.

The rest of the page was blank. Confused, Sasuke activated his Sharingan, seeing only chakra surrounding the paper, and the words prompted images in his sharingan. It was a jutsu, he realized with a start. The chakra seemed to be centred around a certain point, which he figured must be the trigger. Clever, Naruto. He thought.

Well, if Naruto had gone to this much trouble, it had to be worth it. With Naruto, it always was. His hands formed the symbols seamlessly, and touched the pointed tips of his fingers that formed the final tiger to the centred point.

Hello Sasuke-teme a smooth baritone filled Sasuke's ears and Sasuke repressed a jump, looking around reflexively. There was no one there, but a deep chuckle resonated through his senses. Relax, it's just me. I thought I might as well give you something to remember this Valentines day with. It was Naruto's voice, but there was a different, deeper, almost liquid, tone to it. I'm going to tell you what we would be doing right now, if I were there. The voice shivered through him as he realized what it was. Naruto's voice had dipped down into seductive, and Sasuke found himself already reacting to the husky tone.

It would start out as an argument, like it always does with us. Something silly, but then, it usually is. I start to say something back, and by this time you're getting annoyed at me for talking to much., so you cover my mouth with yours. My mouth is already open, and I moan softly as you tease me, licking around my lips but nothing else. Finally I get impatient, it doesn't take long, and I catch your tongue with mine, pulling it into my mouth.

Sasuke was having no trouble what so ever imagining this, Naruto had captured their actions perfectly, and the rich music that he spoke it in only made it better. He could almost taste the sunshine and spice that made up his blond.

But we're both impatient, so I'll pull away, moving my lips down your neck, sucking softly at the place you like until it makes a mark, and you moan oh so softly. I'll keep kissing your neck, and then your ear in that way that makes you shiver, and I'll slowly pull your shirt off, running my hands everywhere. Then I'll pause, and let you take off my shirt. I'll watch you for a few seconds, but I won't be able to hold back for long.

Sasuke was biting his lip as he pictured this, their chest rubbing together, bare skin against bare skin, caressing and sliding and sparking in that way Naruto always causes.

I'll gently let my tongue trace lightly over your chest, teasing you until you growl in that sexy way that I love, and I won't be able to stop myself. I let myself lick all over your chest, tasting the taste only you have, gently sucking your nipples to make you moan. I'm sure you wish I was there now, slowly sliding my tongue down to your pants.

Sasuke stifled a moan as he let his own hand try to perform Naruto's words, but it wasn't the same. He could only barely feel the soft fire that was Naruto's wicked tongue, which now spun him into a fantasy world of heat and passion.

I'll glance up at you softy, watching as you gasp, your face flushed and unmasked, staring down at heat which burns me inside out. I'll smirk, and pull down your pants, pausing to admire the view. And damn, it's a tasty view. I'll start at your knees, licking and nibbling and sucking my way up slowly, reviling in your frustrated growls.

Sasuke let one hand slip inside his pants, ghosting close to his arousal, but holding back, cursing Naruto for drawing this out so much.

I bet you're hating me now, aren't you, Sasuke? the words was nothing but raw, liquid sex that made him want to twist and writhe under it as it sent pulses of pleasure to every nerve is his body. So, I'll pause to leave a bite, just to prove that you belong to me. Sasuke shivered at the thought, and realized that he did. He belonged to Naruto mind, body and soul, and he couldn't bring himself to care. Nothing but the tingles racing up and down his spine and the blaze that sets his mind on fire.

I'll take pity on you, and slowly pull your underwear down with my teeth. Sasuke groaned softly, picturing Naruto doing just that, his blue eyes searing with passion as they met Sasuke's own, laughter hidden the their depths. I'll tease you just a bit more, blowing softly, just to bug you. You'll growl, almost angry and so sexy that I won't be able to hold back.

Sasuke felt his own hand began to move without his consent, and he can pretend it's really Naruto, because the voice itself is a caress, a sensuous purr that sears him and stirs a fire under his skin.

So I'll lick the head softly, just meaning to tease. But you taste so damn good Naruto's voice was filling with more heat than Sasuke had thought possible, and he feels like his skin is going to burn right off if Naruto doesn't get the damn point. So I'll take another taste, more this time, and the noises you make are like liquid fire, and I can't stop myself from moaning. Saasuke. And this time it's a real moan, a gasp of arousal that sends shocks straight through him.

I'll finally taste it all, but I have to pull back because you're writhing and whimpering, but I can't stay away, and all I can think of is more, and I move one hand to trail over everything else, and I can't stop, because every noise is wonderful, and I want to taste more. I can't hold back a suck, trying to draw out more of that delicious tang, and suddenly you cry out, and I taste more, and I love every moment.

Sasuke's hand was moving at a desperate speed, trying to relieve the tightening, burning pleasure that is filling every molecule

I only have to look up, and see the way you arch off the bed, the way you call my name and watch the expression on your face, and I'm done. I moan your name. Saauuske!! And Sasuke finishes, carried away on a typhoon of kindblowing pleasure, crying out Naruto's name into the silence.

Wow, my first lemon. Srrry it's so rushed. I had to get it out by midnight, and it posted at 11:56 so I had no time to ponder. I do plan to reedit it and all that jazz, but I'm just did a spell check and will replace copy 1 with this, since it will still be published on Feb 14. I hope. Well anyway, if you want the real lemon chapter 2, review!! And all suggestions are welcome.

And yes, I know Naruto is a bit seme, but hey, it is a fantasy, he's just telling Sasuke about it. We'll let him dream. Plus, I hate Uke-Seme locked relationships. If you love someone, you want to be owned by them, not just to own them. It's giving and taking, a balance. So yeah, I hope it was enjoyable!

Haha Rayne, I wrote a lemony scene first, so you can no longer call me a wimp (tongue out with victory sign)