Week 2
"Lucy, if you ask me ("I didn't") that boy is head over heels for you."
"Syd, you didn't see him. That night he went after Jessica. Theres no way he will ever be over her and I don't think I can be second anymore. And i swear if anyone ever finds out that I have told you any of this I will personally kill you!" I still cant believe I told Sydney all about time travel and the team and Flynn and the journal… and Jessica. If Agent Christopher ever found out I would probably be arrested. But I had to tell him something if I wanted to stay here with him.
Sydney is my best friend in the world, with the exception of Amy of course. I truly would be homeless if it weren't for him. We met one night in College. The guy I was dating at the time, Brad, was roommates with Sydney. He hated him. Hated his 'awful drag queen roommate'. Brad didn't understand why he was forced to room with someone who was more interested in him than the girls he would bring back. He also didn't understand how Syd and I could so instantly be best friends. It eventually ran a wedge between us and we broke up because of it. However, even though Brad and I never spoke again Sydney and I remained best friends through everything. He has ben my rock. Anytime anything seemed like it wasn't going the way I thought it was supposed to he was there to tell me to 'Suck it up princess there are bigger queens than you' and everything seemed ok after that.
It was only natural then that after my mom dropped the biggest bomb ever by telling me she was Rittenhouse and that I was 'Royalty' that I would end up on his doorstep. I had considered going to Wyatt. He after all understands everything and could even help come up with a solution. But I needed my Queen more than I needed a hug and rejection (which I would surely get from Wyatt… Right?). So When I left my mothers that night I went back to Mason Industries to fill them all in on what happened, fought with Wyatt about where I would go (He couldn't protect me if I wasn't with him) and then I went straight to Sydney. He opened the door to see me standing there pale as a ghost with tears and mascara running down my face and a bag at my feet. 'Oh Doll, Come give momma some love.' And he ushered me into his house. We sat in his living room and downed a bottle of my favorite red wine and I told him everything. Since that night I have been sleeping in his guest room and having one huge slumber party every night just like we used to in college. I just wasn't ready to share him with the others just yet. He was my safe place that none knew about and I selfishly wanted it to stay that way.
So after that awkwardly strange night at the bar last night with Wyatt I couldn't wait to tell Syd everything. That way he could tell me I was reading too much into what was said and everything would be ok again. So here we sat in his kitchen drinking morning mimosas ('because thats what every great Queen does') and talking about weather Wyatt does or doesn't have feelings for me. Somehow everything always seemed to come back to that night. The night Wyatt told her he was going to go get Jessica back. No matter how much Syd thinks Wyatt cares about me I just remember what he said ('Whatever happens, It will be worth it to have Jessica back') that night and that wall goes right back up around my heart.
"Don't worry Lu, your secret is safe with me. But you really do need to talk to this guy. You should give him the chance to prove you wrong. He may have gone after her but he came back for you. He could have stayed locked away in that cell when he was arrested. If he was truly as heart broken about his wife as you say then he wouldn't have cared about what happened to you or Rufus. The fact that he broke out of there at all proves something. It proves that there are feeling there. Feelings that you owe it to yourself to explore."
"I'm scared Sydney. I have never felt like this before and I just know I'm going to get hurt. No I cant let any of this happen. I'll die alone if I have to. My priority needs to be Amy."
"Right the sister. Im sorry I don't remember her, she sounds like she would be on my side with all of this. Once you get her back maybe the two of us can gang up on you and force you to admit things to Wyatt. Hey! What about this journal you said that Gracie Flan guy gave you?"
"Garcia Flynn. ('Same thing') And what about it?"
"Have you read it? It might tell you about Amy… or about Wyatt…and give you some clues as to whats next."
"I can't read it! It's too dangerous to know your future. What if by reading it I change something? What if by reading what 'other me' wrote I can't bring back Amy?
"What if all that happens by you not reading it?" He lets out an exasperated sigh "Look all I am saying is that if my future was as unsure as yours is right now and there was a book that could give me some sort of hint as to what is coming next I would feel a lot better about everything. Better the devil you know than the devil you don't. Just think about it LuLu. I'm going to go meet James for lunch. See you at dinner?"
"Ill even order the good stuff."
"Thats my girl." Then he was out the door and I was all alone. Alone with my thought is never a good idea these days. Maybe Syd is right. Maybe I am thinking about this too much. Maybe I should read the journal. No harm ever came from reading a book after all. OK I am going to read it. But just everything up till now. Not the future. Maybe it will give me e new perspective on what has already happened. A new perspective is good and could help me come up with answers I count think of before. Heading to my room I grab the small black journal out of my bag.
The first few entries read just like a textbook. I figured if thats what I was going to read I would need some wine. so an hour and three glasses of wine later I have caught up with all of the entries leading up to today. It was very emotional at times and very dry at other points. I wrote a lot more about Wyatt than I probably should have but I realize that Wyatt and I tend to gravitate towards each other. In everything we do he was never all that far from me.
I am suddenly wondering about his perspective on everything that happened. What happened here at Mason while I was with Flynn when he abducted me? What did he go through during all of that? What were he and Rufus really doing to that rocket that night in Germany? What was he feeling that night he kissed me in front of Bonnie and Clyde? Would I have have the guts to ask him?
I am about to pour another glass of wine and read on just another entry or two when I hear my phone go off. Its Agent Christopher. Emma jumped again. Leaving the journal, the open bottle of wine, my glass and a note for Sydney I take off and am on my way to the past. And to Wyatt.