"I never want to see another gun again," Eric said fervently as they existed the armoury four and half hours later.
"Not even in your video games?" teased Deeks, stretching out his arms. Something popped. "Oohhhh, that was good."
Callen was twisting his back, convinced that if they had spent any longer in there, he would become Quasimodo.
"I don't think I can feel my fingers," he complained, stretching out the offending digits.
"All I can smell is metal polish," huffed Sam.
"And leather," added Eric.
"Do you think the stains will come out of our fingers?" asked Deeks, inspecting his own carefully. "I don't think I suit this shade of brown."
They all rolled their eyes at him, a personal record, and made their way back into the glorious light of the main office. Only for it to be blocked by two shadows.
"Hello boys," greeted Nell with a Hetty-poker face.
"Punishment over?" questioned Kensi, left foot tapping. A sure sign of her annoyance.
"For now," Deeks said hesitantly.
The two women looked at each other and smirked.
"Good," they said in unison, eyeing them all up.
"Well, this looks like a partner problem," declared Sam, slapping Eric on the back-almost making him fall over.
Callen started to carefully edge around them. "We'll leave you to it," he stated.
"Oh yes you will," said Kensi with her eyes narrowed at Deeks, who gulped.
Eric wasn't faring much better, cowering under Nell's gaze. She had been taking lessons from Hetty.
The woman spun on their heels and strode up the stairs to Ops without another word. Their respective partners looked warily at each other. Was that an indication to follow them?
"Eric."
"Deeks."
The two immediately scrambled after them. Yes it was.
Sam and Callen watched as their partners in crime were basically led away by their respective others. They exchanged smirks.
Callen kicked back in his chair and folded his arms behind his head, "I'm suddenly very glad that we are partners, partner."
Sam raised an eyebrow at him, "Only suddenly?"
His partner shrugged a jerked his head towards the recalcitrant backs of the younger men.
"We don't have women to answer to," he explained smugly.
"Well, not here," admitted Sam.
"See? That's what you get."
"For what? Marrying the woman of my dreams?" demanded Sam.
"For tying yourself down," Callen teased, not being serious about it.
He did adore Michelle after all. She ganged up on Sam with him without any fear of reprisal, unlike Deeks. That, and she cooked an amazing roast.
"You can't possibly think that she'd approve of what we did today," Callen added smugly.
"Well, no," Sam admitted. "But what she doesn't know won't hurt her."
"I though you didn't keep secrets."
"About the important things," Sam stressed.
"Are you saying that us insulting and aggravating LAPD officers to the point were they seriously looked like they wanted to 'mistakenly' shoot us isn't something Michelle would want to know?"
"Definitely not."
Callen leaned forwards onto his desk, a smirk curling around his face, "How do you know if Hetty has already informed her or not?"
Sam's eyes widened comically. Rather cartoon-like actually.
"She wouldn't do that?" Sam asked in a whisper, looking over his shoulders at the woman at her desk. "Would she?"
"Maybe if she thinks you need to be grounded," Callen said tauntingly, almost snorting at the thought of Sam's um, large body trying to get comfortable on his living room sofa.
"What about you?" asked Sam, folding his arms.
"What about me?" Callen responded lazily.
"Won't Ana disapprove?"
Callen snorted in amusement and rolled his eyes.
"She'll be disappointed that she didn't get a chance to join in. She still hasn't quite forgiven them for giving Arkady her coordinates…"
"What happened to the 'never dating a woman with her own gun' rule?"
Callen shrugged. "It wasn't written in stone. And it was handcuffs, by the way."
Sam rolled his eyes.
"How about you date a normal woman for a change," Sam suggested.
"And what do you mean by 'normal'?" demanded Callen, slightly belligerently. "You mean one that nags?"
"Are you saying Michelle nags me?"
Callen put up his hands placatingly, "Not at all. She's just very…protective. And scary."
Which she was. Callen never meant to imply that Michelle nagged. She was far too cool for that.
"Also, your wife is not normal."
"She is!" Sam insisted, slightly insulted.
"Oh yes, your sort-of-ex-CIA come housewife come protective mother bear that's capable of using a gun effectively is totally normal."
"More normal than most of the females I know," Sam said quietly so Hetty, Kensi or Nell couldn't hear them.
His partner snorted loudly, making Hetty look up curiously.
"I can find you more weapons to clean, boys," she called over warningly.
"We're good, Hetty," Callen said hastily.
Sam nodded vigorously, pointedly stretching out his back as if he was stiff Hetty gave them one last piercing stare before returning to her own reports. The two partners breathed a sigh of relief.
"I'm just saying that a free and easy relationship is the way to go," Callen said, picking up heir conversation again after a few minutes.
"Oh yeah, 'cause I'm the loser here. With an amazing woman who adores me and two spectacular children?" Sam retorted in the same tone, smirking.
"I'm just saying that I'm as free as a bird."
"You mean as restless as a puppy."
"At least I'm potty-trained."
"Who's potty-trained?" asked Deeks, swinging himself down the stairs from Ops.
He didn't look to worse for wear. Kensi had an air of smug satisfaction around her. Callen really hoped they hadn't done anything appropriate up there.
"Definitely not you," muttered Sam, hiding a smile behind a case report.
"I'll have you know that I am perfectly trained," Deeks informed them.
"By me," retorted Kensi.
Deeks got a goofy smile on his face, "Yep."
Oh yeah, they definitely did something inappropriate up there. Fantastic. He'd have to buy more anti-bacterial wipes.
Ignoring the possibility that his co-workers had probably been at least partially naked a few minutes ago, Callen looked up at Ops.
"Eric not been released yet?"
Kensi and Deeks shrugged.
"Should we pity him?" asked Sam, semi-seriously.
"Depends," Callen said thoughtfully, wincing at the places his mind went.
He unconsciously flicked his eyes to Kensi and Deeks. Sam caught the look and frowned at him, not needing any of those images in his head.
"On whether or not he's getting the same kind of talk as I did," Deeks said with a particularly dopey grin.
The two older agents groaned. Callen put his hands over his ears and started humming loudly. Sam rolled his eyes at his partner but still looked disgusted.
"What happened to 'out of the office'?" Sam demanded.