THE SHRINK
He sat across from me in a dark brown leather armchair, just the silvery edges of a man made me identify him as the male human, but he was filled in with a blue silver he wasn't real, he was just a part of my dream, my therapist dreams, so I called him my shrink.
The dreams were usually just a bunch of questions being asked by the man and I was to give my answer, whether it was honest or not. These dreams started after the ICCA's my freshman year at Barden, our performance at Lincoln Center was unbeatable and I managed to add 'Don't you Forget about Me' to the arrangement. That night was the night I kissed Jesse in front of everyone, even now as I start my senior year at Barden I question why I did that. Maybe it was because I felt the need to have that cliché ending that Jesse obsesses over, but the movies don't talk about what happens after that moment. The audience is supposed to just infer that they live happily ever after and that they'll have kids and grow old together. I realized that I didn't have the same kind of love for Jesse like he had for me, but I blocked those thoughts out for two years and just went along with dating Jesse.
A month ago I had finally come to terms with what was going on with Jesse and had broken up with him a week ago after revealing his plans of heading to LA before the year ended.
"So Beca how are you dealing with the breakup," my shrink implored with a delicate and soft voice. I stopped questioning how he knew these things a while ago, he was in my head after all. There was no real heartbreak for me, I was more upset about him moving to LA because I still considered him one of my best friends. The shrink could hear my thoughts, I could feel him nodding his head in approval as I thought. "And Chloe?" the same question asked every session and even after breaking up with Jesse I didn't know how to react to that question.
Chloe Beale. She crashed my shower and forced me to sing while naked my freshman year at Barden, we became instantly close when I joined the Bellas. Her bubbly persona and just general cheerfulness made her polar opposites with me in personality type, but we both shared an intense love for music. Bit by bit Chloe had broken down the emotional walls that I had built up after my dad left my mom and me when I was a child, even Jesse hadn't been able to do that. I had found that letting people in only led to heartbreak, but I had changed a lot since first entering Barden. Chloe's and mines relationship was strange, I had never had a close friend so the stuff I did with Chloe seemed to be the norm for friendships. Cuddling, hand holding, and other "friendly" things was what Chloe and me did and I often found myself enjoying it more than I should be. Most of the time I blocked out these feelings but they had been more prominent lately after the whole Amy incident.
"Chloe is good," I answered weakly trying to shake out all the images of Chloe's red hair and piercing blue eyes. "Are you happy?" was his next question, was I happy? It was a month into my senior year and I had gotten the internship of my dreams, so I was kind of happy. "From what I can see, you are unable to understand what happy is at the moment" the shrink answered, before I could ask what he meant the dream was over.
I slowly opened my tired eyes as bits and pieces of the dream came back to me, I could never remember what completely happened in the dreams, but I got the gist of it. "BECA BREAKEFEST" screamed a voice from downstairs, Fat Amy was up and it sounded like the rest of the girls were too. I groaned as I checked the time, it was only 7, why did they have to go stake out the competition today? For a moment I laid in bed peacefully thinking over how today could possibly turn out, my thoughts were interrupted by a small knock at my door, I grunted in reply hoping the person would leave.
"Becs," said a soft voice as the door slowly opened, it was none other than Chloe Beale in just a long pajama shirt. Her hair seemed a brighter red than usual and I found myself smiling at the thought of Chloe getting any brighter. Chloe grinned at me as she walked into the room, she must have seen me smiling at her. "Why are you smiling?" she asked with a giggle as she sat down on my bed, the giggle only made me smile more. "Your hair is red," I mumbled while trying to shake the goofy grin I probably had on my face. "Yes and yours is brown," she responded with that same giggle, she offered her hand as I struggled to sit up in my bed. We sat next to each other in my small bed, no one said anything for a second before Chloe sighed and rested her head on my shoulder. Her hair tickled my neck and I found myself smiling and playing with a strand her hair that trailed down my shoulder.
Things had been tense recently, with my internship that I had failed to tell Chloe about yet and the Worlds, we hadn't hung out much. "Ok we better go now," I said after a few minutes knowing Fat Amy would be checking up on us if we didn't go down. Chloe took her head off my shoulder and I found myself sighing inwardly as we both stood up and headed downstairs.
"There you two are! What were you two up to?" Amy questioned as we both entered the kitchen, all the Bellas looked at us and Amy rose her eyebrows suggestively. I rolled my eyes at them and walked over to the fridge. "Beca was just telling me my hair was red," Chloe spoke up from behind me as she followed me to the fridge, I mumbled something about red heads stealing souls and Chloe slapped my arm in response. "Enough of the devil jokes," she hissed playfully into my ear, I could feel her hear breathe on my neck and I shuddered at the feeling.
The Bellas all chuckled at Chloe's and mines interaction before going into an intense conversation about out competition, DSM. I had been so busy with the internship I hadn't had the chance to learn much about our rivals. "They're Germans, how good can they be?" Fat Amy said loudly as she mashed on a piece of bacon. "Well if you treat DSM like you're treating the bacon we shouldn't have a problem," I commented with a smirk as I grabbed a couple pieces of bread out of the toaster that Chloe had already prepared for me. "I am the most sexual in this group, if anyone should get to deal with DSM in that way it should be me," Stacie stated, I only rolled my eyes realizing how Stacie took my comment. "No fraternizing with the opponent," Chloe said from her place on the bar stool. "But Chloe it might help us," I murmered as I took the barstool next to hers. She glared at me as everyone started laughing at my comment. "How so?" Chloe asked with a serious tone as she glared at me. "They could get all flustered and mess up," I stated thoughtfully. Before Chloe could respond I added, "Stacie should give them blue balls so they can't dance that well!" Everyone laughed loudly at that, I peeked at Chloe and could see her struggling to fight back a smile. Once the laughing had died down we all finished our food quietly and headed upstairs to get ready.