Cas was fucking exhausted. He could feel the adrenaline turning his muscles to jelly. He kept his elbows locked and concentrated on counting.

Around him he could hear the anxious voices, the occasionally angry snap of one of his colleagues. Some were calm, some were all nerves.

He tried to put it from his mind, not his problem right then. He needed to concentrate as it became harder to keep a fast, strong rhythm. And count.

"28, 29, 30," he said aloud looking up to make sure the anaesthetist had heard him.

He had just enough time to reposition his hands where the heel of his top had rubbed the bottom red before relocking his elbows and starting again.

"Change at next call," someone said and he was grateful, he couldn't keep up the pace much longer.

He tried to steady his breathing. Long and deep, pushing down the urge to hyperventilate. He had to remain calm to keep his muscles working. They already felt like fire with the burn of anaerobic respiration and he needed all the oxygen he could get in.

Cas risked a glance to his left, to the monitor hooked up to the arrest pads. He knew it was next to useless while he was actively doing compressions but part of him still hoped. The line showed only a slight wave of background activity spiking occasionally from where he was pushing down on the guys chest. Nothing. He turned back to his hands the pain dull and aching where he was pushing one on top of the other.

The anaesthetist was leaning over the man's head, tube in hand. Cas didn't let up, he knew the man was good enough to tube through the compressions.

It was done quickly, expertly and the tube blew up, tied in place and attached to the green bag. Somebody had forgot the oxygen and as Cas gave up counting he muttered through his harsh breathing.

Someone heard him, got it hooked up and then 2 minutes were called.

Cas fell back, shaking out his aching arms and running his fingers over the pain by his wrist.

"We've got shockable rhythm," the registrar announced and Cas got back further as the call went up. Immediately after the clear was given Rachel was there with compressions.

He almost staggered to the end of the bed, tightened the pressure bag where someone had set saline to run through a cannula in the guy's foot. At this stage of an arrest any vein would do.

Then he got out completely checking through the resus trolley to make sure they still had plenty of kit left. All the while he shook, the exertion and adrenaline too much for his muscles.

He couldn't rest for long though, knowing that every person here was crucial and there was more to do. He set up the machine to check the guy's blood sugar aware of what the man had taken to get him in this state.

"We need to get some glucose running," he said ripping open a bag. "Sugar's 1.9."

"Shit," the registrar swore. "Bolus some 20%."

Cas was ahead of him.

"What the fuck did this guy take anyway?"

Cas shrugged as he ran his line through. "Not entirely sure. They found packs and packs of tablets at his house, some legal, some not. How much and of what he took is unknown."

Someone handed the reg the list and he swore low.

"Could be any or all of these things. Tox-screen run?"

"Yes, but he's only been here 2 hours, in the hospital for 5."

"Stomach pumped?"

"It looks likely it was staggered."

"Shit," the registrar swore again. They all knew they were up shit creek with this one.

Another doctor ran down, little white roll of paper in her hands, she handed it over. "He's hypoxic, acidotic, base excess is obscene."

More swearing, some hastily set up IVs and the reg shaking his head at Cas in silent knowledge. This was not looking good.

Sam Winchester was one of Castiel's favourite people.

Firstly because he was smart and kind and never let awkward silences get in the way of friendship. Secondly because he genuinely cared about his patients which was something Cas was beginning to doubt in the hardened world of acute psychiatry. Thirdly because he'd taken the news that Cas was bi so in his stride that he'd made Cas feel like an idiot for even bringing it up. Fourthly because he didn't get pissed when Cas snapped when he was having a bad day. Fifthly because he always brought Cas a small bag of jellybeans or fruit gums or if Cas was really lucky and Sam had stopped by the superstore off Weston the blue and pink cola bottles that Cas loved more than anything in the whole world.

Cas wanted nothing more than to hug the man as he looked into the bag and almost cried at the small joy and show of friendship.

"Four new ODs overnight I see," Sam said looking at his crumpled sheet. Sam could only have been in for an hour max and already his handover looked like it had been through the wash. "Any of them yours?"

"I was on last night," Cas told him the weariness of it hitting him like a steel bat to the knees. He collapsed into a chair at the nurses' station and wondered if he'd ever be able to get up again or whether he should just sit there all day and wait for his next shift to begin.

"And you're still here why?"

"Because Mr Beckett - OD number three on your list - arrested."

"Holy shit," Sam breathed. It was so unlike the psych to swear that Cas raised his eyebrows. "It's just- I know him. He's been doing this for years, before you came to this hospital. Then he seemed to get over it, he got married, brought a house."

"Looks like he'd been stockpiling his antidepressants," Cas shrugged. Beckett had been run to ITU for ventilation and stabilisation. "And some other shit from the streets."

Sam shook his head. "I'll check up on him later," he promised. "You go get some sleep. You in tonight?"

"Yes," Cas groaned dragging himself from the uncomfortable chair.

"Tomorrow?"

"No, that's me done. Not sure I could take any more anyway."

"Just a bad night Cas."

"It's always a bad night."

He clapped his hand on Sam's shoulder to show he was ok and made his way to the staff room. Sam was waiting as he got out.

"Look I was going to ask if you wanted to go for a drink tomorrow. My brother's moving to town and I want to celebrate. He doesn't exactly know anybody up here so I'm getting a few people together. Come on Cas, it'll be fun and you need to wind down."

Cas shrugged noncommittally. "We'll see if my bed lets me go."

He left with a wave. The last thing he wanted to do was go out right then, he just wanted sleep. And blue and pink cola bottles.

Sam tapped him pen on the desk in front of Castiel.

"What?" Cas asked eventually.

"You bailed the other night."

"I overslept."

"Past 8 o'clock at night?"

"I slept for 16 hours straight." He'd woken at 2am groggy and the kind of exhausted you get after too much sleep. Wednesday night had killed him and Thursday night had fluttered past like some sort of dream. Now it was Sunday and he was back on days again in some sick twisted joke on his already fucked circadian rhythm.

"Dude you need to chill out a bit. You work too much."

Cas nodded. It was no secret he was working every hour god gave him. Nobody knew why though and Cas wanted to keep it that way, it would all lead to too many questions.

"I could say the same to you. Why are you here on a Sunday Sam?"

"My weekend on call. And I believe you have a Miss Canning for me."

Cas handed him the folder glad someone had come to see the hell bitch.

"Good luck," he smiled.

"Dean didn't show either on Friday," Sam said picking up their conversation from earlier as if he didn't have a patient to see.

"Your brother?"

"Says he got stuck in Nevada. He's stalling though I'm not sure why."

Cas settled back in his seat aware that Sam needed to talk. He wasn't sure what about him gave off the aura that he was willing to listen but apparently there was something as Sam wasn't the only person who used him as a confidant. It was part of why Cas had got into nursing in the first place.

He'd been a shy and quiet young man. He didn't particularly like speaking to people but for some reason he'd always put them at their ease without trying. People felt comfortable around him. He'd tried to shoo them away but they never took him seriously and always came back. It wasn't in Castiel's nature to be mean so he listened and he gave carefully picked advice, all the while wondering what he'd done to earn so much trust.

So he was a quiet and thorough nurse. His patients didn't mind that he didn't banter with them the same way others did. They always felt comfortable telling him their problems but they didn't moan to him as much as they did the others. Quiet and happy patients, quiet and happy Cas. It just seemed to work.

His assessors in college had been confused by his communication skills. Mainly that he didn't seem to have any and yet he somehow formed relationships with even the most difficult patients and staff. They'd passed him, but sometimes Cas wondered if it had been begrudgingly.

"Stalling about his job or something else?"

Cas did like Sam though, so he put aside his awkwardness at having to have the deep conversation and listened.

"He's always loved his job," Sam shrugged. "But we haven't really spoken in 7 years."

Cas remained silent, didn't push. It was a skill that had often gained him trust where others failed.

"There was an accident. Our father died. Sam shrugged, trying to belittle his emotion. "I told him it was good riddance."

Cas could hardly believe the kind and gentle Sam to say such, but he kept his surprise off his face and listened.

"I was angry, I didn't... But Dean always did idolise dad and he hated that I could see his flaws. To be honest it surprised me when he said he wanted to move closer."

"He's making an effort to reconnect with you Sam."

"I know. But then he doesn't show."

"He'll be there. I think he needs time. You both do. It's not going to be easy."

"Yeah I know. But I... I want my brother back."

Cas nodded. He doesn't try to belittle Sam by telling him it will all be ok. He knows there's very real danger there and so instead he takes a deep breath, "let me know if there's anything I can do Sam."

Sam lit up at his offer. "I think you'll really like him Cas. You remind me of him, in a way. Except he's loud and brash and isn't really a thing like you. Just that he was my best friend and he has that way you do, of making everything feel better."

Cas flushed. He'd always been bad at accepting praise, especially from his friends.

"Thank you Sam."

Which was how Cas ended up meeting Dean Winchester in the dark a few miles out of the city.

He pulled up in his mustang when he saw the gleam of his headlights reflected off chrome and black.

"Goddammit," the elder Winchester swore aiming a kick at the back tire of the Impala. He was covered in darkness, Cas's headlights aimed at the front of the car.

"Dean Winchester?"

"Yes? Who the fuck are you?"

Dean kicked the tire again and the jack shifted with a creek causing both men to back off.

His harsh tone surprised Cas. He'd expected Dean to be like Sam, calm and friendly. What he got was loud and angry.

"My name is Castiel. Sam sent me to pick you up."

Dean swore once more under his breath ducking down in the dark to lower the jack and let the impala down. Once it was out and there was no chance of the car falling on his head Cas breathed a sigh of relief. His first aid skills were top notch but he wasn't sure he'd be able to fix a crushed skull.

"Where is he? Can't even come get his own brother?"

"There was an emergency. Sam is on call tonight."

"Emergency? Fuck that. I'm his brother."

And although Cas knew he shouldn't, he had to defend Sam. "A woman tried to murder her two children by feeding them crushed up paracetamol mixed in with their milk. Sam's trying to get her committed and the children into state custody."

Dean shut up at that. Cas could almost make out the widening of his eyes in the dark.

"Shit."

"Yes. Shit," Cas said sternly. "So stop the temper tantrum and get in the car. I'll drop you off at his house and he will see you when he is finished."

Dean picked up the jack and the spare tire he hadn't been able to put on, dumping them in the trunk of the old car. He looked like he was going to come quietly until Cas opened the driver's door of the mustang and light lit the two men.

For a moment Dean blinked in the sudden light. He was a tall, well-built man. Cas would have tagged him for a rugby player if the sport had been more prevalent in the US. He had the muscle for it. Sam was bigger, his muscle honed from the gym but Cas suspected Dean got his from hard work and tough sports.

He had dark hair that shone a burnished gold in the cab light, light freckled skin and a pink O of a mouth.

Cas stood in surprise for a moment. Rarely did he ever notice how physically attractive people were straight from the off. Usually it took a long friendship or someone grabbing his chin, pointing him the right way and saying "He's hot." Cas supposed it was because he always looked for something deeper in his relationships. He wanted to fall in love with someone because of who they were, not because of what they looked like.

Dean also had blood dripping from his hairline.

Cas darted forward, reaching for the man's hair.

"Whoa Cas," Dean said as Cas bent him forward to get a better look. "Oh. I thought you were going to kiss me."

Cas grumbled as he got a good look at the cut. It was 2 inches long, the blood now matted in his hair. He must have been holding something to it for a while to stop the bleeding and contain the haematoma that surrounded the gash.

"This needs suturing and a compression bandage," Cas said all business. "I'll drive you to the hospital."

"Look man all I want to do is sleep."

Cas frowned and if Dean had any sense he knew he wouldn't be getting his own way.

Cas searched his pockets for a pen torch. "Look at me."

"Cas I'm fine."

"Do you have any medical training?"

"Well no."

"Then shut up and let me check you over."

It was rare for Castiel to ever be rude but Dean brought it out in him. The man was infuriating. Maybe because just looking at him made Cas feel hot and flustered. Especially since he'd been such a jerk.

His pupils were reactive and equal, blown in the dark but nothing unexpected. Dean had pretty hazel eyes threaded with green that grew brighter as his pupils constricted. He licked his lips.

Cas herded him into the car, made sure he did up his seatbelt and ignored his complaints.

Dean quieted after the first few minutes and set back to sulk. They were turning onto main street when he spoke again.

"So you're one of Sam's doctor friends?"

"No," Cas replied. He didn't want to engage in this conversation, he wanted to merely stitch Dean up and drop him home.

"Dude you're wearing scrubs."

"So I am."

It was something Cas had been doing for a while now. He'd been broke for so long he now lived in scrubs. He'd change after a hard day's work into a new set. Castiel tried to keep his expenditure to an exact minimum, including utilities, food and clothing. He had to pay for his small apartment and the old car that had once been his fathers, but pretty much everything else was optional. New clothes were a luxury and he was comfortable in the well-worn scrubs.

Dean snorted in annoyance.

"So why else would you be wearing them?"

"I'm a nurse."

Dean shrugged, the answer deemed acceptable. Cas though was worried by the way he was rubbing his head. He pulled into the staff car park and came round to help Dean out.

"Headache?"

"Yeah."

"Any blurred vision?"

"No. I just feel a bit foggy."

Cas pulled out his pen torch again and Dean batted his hand away.

"Man I'm fine."

Cas resisted, smacking Dean's hand as he lifted the torch to look in his eyes. No change. Good.

Inside he booked Dean in and told them he could deal with the sutures and dressing if one of the doctors could just stick his head in briefly.

Dean fidgeted on the trolley, refusing to put his legs up and so Cas was forced to stand between his legs to examine the wound in the brighter light.

He tried to ignore how close he was to Dean.

"Sorry I'm not good at hospitals. Lot of bad memories... from when dad died."

Cas merely nodded as he prepared his things. He had to be steady to do this and it would be much easier if Dean was lying down. Instead he made Dean move back so his back was at least stable against the wall and Cas could lean his hips on the edge of the trolley between Dean's legs.

The swelling had gone a little with Dean keeping a compress on it. Examining the laceration again Cas decided it couldn't be held with paper stitches and started to pull on his sterile gloves.

"You ok with needles?"

"I've sewn myself up before," Dean grinned and Cas frowned at him.

"That's a bad idea for so many reasons."

Dean lifted his sleeve, his grin growing impossibly wider. There was a nasty scar on his deltoid running in perfect line with the bottom edge of the muscle.

"How did that happen?"

Dean shrugged and Cas noticed the interesting things it did to the heavy muscles strung across his shoulders and chest. Damn but he could hate himself right then.

"Stay still," he told the man and started cleaning the wound.

"We were staying at my dad's friend's house and me and Sam went exploring his junk yard. I fell and got caught on some metal. I was 15 and didn't want to tell my dad so I broke into Bobby's supplies and fixed it up myself."

Cas raised an eyebrow as he worked.

"That's not the end of the story."

"Na. It got infected and gross. Wound popped with all this yellow puss. Dad found out. He was pissed. It got into my blood and I was in hospital for weeks."

Cas nodded, he'd guessed something like that.

"All this sterile equipment isn't just for show," he told the man with a half-smile.

Dean was silent as he sutured the laceration. It took seven tiny and precise sutures to close. Cas was proud of his work, it was neat and tiny and would give the wound the best chance of not scarring. He slapped on some gauze and because, although he was a good person, he wasn't perfect he wound crepe bandage around Dean's head a few times, under his chin and then around again and again.

Dean looked horrified by the dressing but he allowed Cas to do as he would.

All in all Dean looked a mess. The doctor arrived a few minutes later, poked his head through the charted vitals, neurological examination and shrugged.

"Mild pain killers and rest. You got someone to keep an eye on you for the night?"

Cas groaned thinking of how Sam was the only one Dean knew here and how he'd be busy for most of the night.

"Um not really," Dean said sounding sheepish.

The doctor looked pointedly at Cas. "I don't want to have to admit you Mr Winchester but it's unsafe to spend the night alone."

"He can stay with me," Cas sighed giving in.

"Cas, man, I..."

Cas raised a hand as he tidied up. "You want to stay here for the night?"

Dean shut up. "No, not really."

"Then come on."

Dean went to the main desk to sort out his insurance as Jess came up and bounced next to Cas's shoulder.

"Hey you! What are you doing in my neck of the woods?"

Working in the ER often Jess would have to bring a patient to admissions but Cas rarely made the trip back unless he was on the scrounge for something they'd ran out of on the unit.

"A friend hit his head."

"Friend huh? That him? He's hot, like really hot."

"I thought you were into his brother?" Cas asked and Jess went pink. It always surprised Cas how she held back her feelings for the other Winchester. They got on well, all sweet flirtation and shy smiles. Jess had steadfastly refused to let him set them up though which was a shame in Castiel's eyes.

"I do. I mean I don't. I mean- Cas! Sam's sweet and handsome and..."

"Single," Cas reminded her gently.

"Yes but he's also... I couldn't, I'd turn beet red and probably pass out."

"Then let me."

"No! Anyway this is about your new friend. I saw you looking. Is he gay?"

Cas honestly had no idea. He had a total lack of anything resembling a gaydar. "I was not looking," he settled on.

Jess bounced again, grin wide and beautiful. "Cas! I love you but you've got to get a clue. So?"

"I don't know," Cas tried hoping it would quiet her. "I only met him an hour ago."

Jess gave him a long look at that. "An hour?"

"Sam called to say that Dean had broken down and he couldn't pick him up because he'd had a big case come in so I picked Cas up."

"I didn't realise you and Sam were such good friends."

"I didn't either," Cas shrugged. He supposed it was an extension of people confiding in him.

Jess suddenly beamed again. "Oh I get it!" But she'd say no more as Dean came over.

"Jess this is Dean, Sam's brother. Dean this is Jess, she works here."

"Oh," Dean grinned getting a good look at the pretty nurse. "You're the one he's always going on about."

Jess blushed a deep pink and Cas shook his head. He turned Dean round and pushed him towards the exit. "I'll see you soon Jess," he called back.

Part 2&3 will follow soon!