Hello everyone,
My roommate, Annavance92, had the fabulous idea to see how Alucard would torture Integra if she ever felt possessed to try her hand at speed dating. My roommate, however, is a reader and not a writer, so I took up her idea and ran with it.
This chapter is mainly exposition, and I apologize for that. Alucard gets a bit of a chance to be his troll of a self, but will have more opportunities in the upcoming chapters. I encourage you all to stick it out and read chapter two.
Please read and review. Reviews make my day. I'm dead serious. I appreciate them that much.
-Kanotari
***Disclaimer: I do not own Hellsing, or any of its characters… though I dearly wish I did.***
Forever Alone
Integra felt like clawing her own eyes out. Her boredom was starting to get to her. It had been nearly three months since the Hellsing organization had destroyed its last vampire. There hadn't been so much as a sighting since. She had written the budget for next year and gotten it approved by the Board of Trustees. She had retrained her men to combat increasingly difficult vampires, with a little help from her vampire servants of course. She had even waded through job applications and three rounds of interviews to fill the gaps left by the staff members who could have used their advanced training a little earlier. There was simply nothing left to do around the Hellsing estate. Integra needed to escape for a little while.
It had been so long since she had free time like this. Integra wondered what normal people her age did around town. She knew they liked to travel in packs. She considered asking Seras to go shopping with her, but the young vampire was nowhere to be found. Integra trusted Walter with her life, but she couldn't picture him unwinding enough to enjoy a shopping trip with her. As for Alucard, well, she didn't even want to think of what potential nightmares that would result in. She needed to find somebody else, and quickly. Her sanity was waning rapidly.
An idea struck her; a crazy idea, but an idea nonetheless. Normal women her age cared about men. They were either in a relationship or trying to be in one. Perhaps she needed a boyfriend, or at least a date. The Hellsing director smiled, and placed a phone call.
It was dark outside by the time Integra was ready. She walked down the manor's stairs with her usual poise if not her usual grace. Pumps were not her shoes of choice. They weren't exactly the type of footwear one chooses to confront hordes of angry vampires in. She misjudged the distance between her elevated shoe and the bottom stair, twisting her ankle and falling in an undignified heap. The stately director sincerely hoped no one had witnessed her misfortune, but of course she wasn't so lucky.
"I believe you missed a step," Alucard mocked from the shadows.
"Gee, thanks," she shot back sarcastically as she stood and adjusted her outfit.
"Perhaps you should choose clothing that won't result in your injury," he teased in his deep baritone voice. Integra shook her head at him, and made for the door. The vampire was enjoying himself too much to let his prey escape.
"Going somewhere?" Alucard asked, trapping his master against the wall with a well placed arm. His hot breath hit Integra smack in the face.
"I would be, if you would get out of my way," she hissed through clenched teeth.
"In that?" the vampire asked scathingly. Integra wore a short, yet classy black dress. It was far from her normal attire, but certainly not inappropriate for a night on the town.
"Do you have a problem with the way I dress?" Integra demanded. As a matter of fact, he didn't, but where was the fun in that?
"It's cold outside," he offered lamely.
"I'll be fine," she assured him, rolling her eyes. Frustrating overprotective guardian, she thought to herself. Integra tried to duck under her servant's arm, but he blocked her way with his torso as he both casually and conveniently leaned against the wall.
"Any plans for tonight?" he asked, inspecting a piece of caked blood on his cuticle.
"Yes, but they're none of your business," she answered matter-of-factly.
"Au contraire, madame," Alucard smirked. "I am sworn to protect my master."
Integra rolled her eyes again and opened her handbag. Inside was a 9mm beretta pistol. "Against humans, I am perfectly capable of taking care of myself."
"I'll remember that when you run home crying," he laughed, though he moved himself away from the wall and gave her room to breathe.
"Good night, Alucard," she said firmly, storming past the insufferable vampire.
Oh... so you're going to be gone all night, Alucard mocked via their telepathic link. Maybe you do have plans after all.
The Hellsing director sighed. The last thing Integra needed tonight was a bored vampire abusing their connection to whisper scathing comments directly into her mind. She tried to banish the unwelcome thought as she headed out into the night. Alucard was right. It was cold, and she probably should have brought a jacket. The nipping frost encouraged her to walk faster, despite her shoe situation. Luckily, she managed to stay on her feet until she reached her destination, a modest restaurant in town.
The bells on the door handle softly tinkled as Integra opened it delicately and peered inside. She had to admit that she felt very self-conscious and exposed in a dress. Business suits were certainly her preferred attire, but one did not come to a place such as this dressed professionally.
She found a table covered in name tags and donned the one that read 'Integra Hellsing' It also bore a green sticker. The highbrow woman sat at the table with the corresponding sticker. The chair across from her was still empty.
"Welcome to Quick Dates!" a woman announced from a nearby microphone. She sounded altogether too happy.
Oh my word, Alucard laughed, distracting the Hellsing director from the annoying announcer. I assumed you had plans with some gentleman caller, not with a room full of desperate hobos.
Integra swore softly, hoping fervently that no one heard her. It was not exactly the first impression she was hoping to make.
Get out my head! she commanded. Can't you entertain yourself, for once in your life?
I'm sure I could find ways to occupy my free time, but none that you would approve of.
Integra chose to ignore the comment, instead putting all her effort into focusing on the painfully-cheery speaker. The blonde woman with the microphone droned on, sounding like a cheerleader at a pep rally. From her physique and garish makeup, Integra deduced that she had probably been just that at one time in her life.
"Alright single people, it's time for your first date. Yay!" She paused, as though she expected some sort of audible reaction from the audience. One never came. She continued on, unfazed. "Please head to the table that matches the sticker on your name tag."
Integra reclined in her seat, waiting for her first date. Her attention fell on a little card slipped under her drink. It was a profile for someone named Richard, presumably the man currently sitting down in the chair on the other side of the table.
As I said above, this is mostly exposition. Please give next chapter a chance, when Integra has her date with Richard, whom Alucard decides is both unemployed and homeless.