Clipper
A short one shot about the thing you want to do most in your life, and the person who makes sure that you can't.
I didn't mean to fall in love. But I did and now I have to deal with the consequences; the restriction and the rejection.
I'm trapped in this relationship and I can't escape… It's my own fault; I went back on the promise I made to myself, to never ever fall in love and to always keep something as mine. But I gave him everything. Thanks to Harry Potter, I have nothing left. Thanks to Harry Potter, he is all I have…
I can't remember how it started. I can't remember the good times either come to think of it… All I can remember are the times I cried and screamed and shouted. All I can remember is the rejection.
At first Ron was ecstatic: I was going out with his best friend! He couldn't have been more over the moon. Until Hermione started going out with Seamus and Ron was alone. I was always confused about that match to be honest; they never did seem like the other's cup of tea. And I know what Seamus is like, remember.
Ron didn't like being alone. We come from a big family and there's always someone there. And it would have been fine… It's just that Gryffindor changed. No longer is it a big happy family where you can talk to anyone. We have our own cliques now, and against each other we're worse than the Slytherins when they lose at Quidditch. Pure poison runs through the veins of some. It's what war does to you.
My family turned against me when Harry started to control everything I did. They didn't like it and I was oblivious to it. They were right about him and I didn't realise until it was too late. But I loved him. I love him. He is my life.
And so I wouldn't listen to any bad thing they said against him. They were just jealous that the hero loved me, they were just trying to make me leave him; trying to make me break his fragile heart…
They had my best interests in their own hearts really. But I turned them down and walked away.
I spend my time now trying to make myself perfect for him. I am his trophy. I don't go out in the sun: I am to be as pale as the moon and my hair as dark as fresh blood. I watch what I eat: I must stay at a perfect size six, with a twenty-three inch waist and thirty-three inch hips and bust… The perfect hourglass figure is all that he wants.
I'm quite the opposite of my old goody two shoes now. I smoke and I drink and I have sex and I answer back. I scream and shout when I don't get my own way… He's spoiled me; and ruined me.
Don't get me wrong, Harry's not bad. He's fabulous to me. Treats me like a princess; calls me beautiful three times more than he calls me fat or anything else degrading. He knows how to pleasure me.
He says that he'll kill himself if I leave him; that he couldn't live without me, and not out of choice either. I have to be happy for him to function, so I put on a smile everyday, whether I feel it or not. He is all I have.
I wanted to be a nurse. I wanted to help people. Know I have to conform to my mother's anti-feminist ideals and become a housewife and a trophy-wife for Harry. I need to keep him happy. I can't be the one to kill The Boy Who Lived. I am perfect at multi-tasking and learnt everything from my mother the year before she turned against me with the rest of the family.
So I hope I won't fail to match Harry's idealistic views of how I should be.
Despite my love I want to escape and follow my dreams. But if I do, Harry will kill himself. Life and love have made him manic depressive and he's harmed before when I've done wrong. I can't hurt him.
No. I won't leave him. I'll stay in this hell of a life. I'll please him, keep him happy and be perfect. It's all I can do after all. Who'd want to kill the hero of the century?