I could never really tell you how much it hurt... that day that you walked away.

I look to my left.

A simple flower, all that was left behind to remind me of better days.

And now that I find myself packing the things that were once yours, I know that this is really over. You won't be here to hold me, to whisper to me. You won't be here to care about me anymore.

I don't think that anyone could ever care about me the way that you did.

Your arms were always my shelter. A place that I could hide from the rest of the world. A place that I could close my eyes and forget all of my worries and fears.

I remember taking in your scent, breathing in every part of you as we cuddled on that bed. It was the perfect size for both of us. I slept comfortably in your embrace, knowing that nothing could harm me as long as you were here.

And nothing could be more perfect than the moments we spent, kissing in the rain.

Night after night, I felt more attached to you. Perhaps this wasn't a good thing. I should have kept my distance like I always do.

I knew that nothing would stop you from finally leaving me.

And that's what you did, Ludwig.

Because I couldn't be perfect.

I couldn't be everything that you wanted.

So... I sit here on the floor of my bedroom, putting things into a box with your name on it.

Nothing could hurt as much as knowing that the one you love doesn't love you back.

Nothing could be as painful as watching them turn around and walk away, never to return to you.

And I knew it would happen, just like it always does.

I think that's what hurts the most of all.

You've taught me something very valuable...

Don't blink, because in a moment, you might miss something. You might lose everything.

It's something that I've always thought about.

And that's why I had to do this.

I left you.

Although I knew it would hurt.

I left you.

Because I was afraid of losing you.

I had grown too fond of your body pressed against mine. Your delicate hands caressing my face as our lips met in a familiar way.

I knew that eventually something would happen, something that would keep me from holding you tight as we slept. I knew that someday, something would stop us from having our happy lives together.

So I stopped it before it even began.

I'm sorry if it hurt you too. But this was something I had to do.

I had to stop everything before we got to close.

Because I love you more than anything.

I can't stand to see you cry.

And if you had fallen in love with me, then when something happened to tear us apart, it would only hurt worse than it does now. You would only cry more than you're crying now.

Love, maybe someday you will understand...

I never meant to hurt you. I only meant to save you from what was to come.

I know how much it hurts to fall in love. I know the dangers that come with wanting to be with somebody. I know what it's like to get hurt from thinking that somebody will be there for you forever.

So, as I pack the clothes that you had forgotten, I take a moment to inhale, remembering your scent. The way you laughed when we were together. That beautiful smile. Your soft skin sliding against mine. A tear falls from my eye and down my cheek, landing neatly on your shirt.

Everything about you was perfect, Absolutely everything.

I feel like a fool for leaving you.

But I had to do it.

I had to leave you /because/ you were perfect. You were far too perfect for me.

Kiku. I know this is hard to understand, but I only want you to be happy...

Even if that means that I have to make you cry first.

Even if that means that I have to leave you.

Because I know that you'll be happier without me in your life... even if right now, you don't feel like that's true.