Everyone, meet Horatio. Horatio, this is everyone. Now tell them your story.

Disclaimer: I don't own TDI but I own any names you may or may recognize i.e. Scott and Horatio. They were created for my own twisted purposes, enjoy.

888

"Alright, who wants to try out the cannon before the campers arrive?" I looked up from the net I was tying in horror as I heard what was slowly becoming the voice of my nightmares. My only thought was get out of here before he spots me.

I dropped the net, it was for some hunting thing a few weeks from now, and I could finish it later. But right now, run away.

I jogged in the direction of the nearby trees, my boots crunching pine needles and leaves as I went before I vaulted myself onto a low branch and scrambled into the tree, hiding myself among the dark leaves and pushing my beloved hat lower over my obnoxiously bright hair.

Hi, I'm Horatio. And I am one of the unfortunate Total Drama interns.

I smiled as I heard our caring host find another victim, sorry dude, everyone for themselves.

I wondered why some of these guys would want to intern for the Great Chris Maclean, I mean, all of them couldn't be doing community service like me, could they? Maybe they just didn't know what a sadist Chris can be.

(Un)Fortunately, for me, my best friend was the host's lover so I already knew Chris better than any intern really should.

You see, my uncle is one of the producers of the company that runs this show. You'd think that would give me blackmail material over Chris right? Wrong. I have to deal with any crap Chris gives me. All because of one little mistake. It wasn't even really my fault.

I was walking around the studio, looking for a guy my uncle wanted to talk to. I was listening to my iPod and fighting imaginary ninjas across the empty set (my shortcut to the break room where this guy was most likely to be found) I had my pocket knife out, slashing an attackers head off with a clean sweep of my arm, then I started to jam to the song that was playing (Welcome Home by Coheed and Cambria for those who were wondering) and my grip loosened and my knife went flying through the air, slicing right through a cable and clattering to the floor. Well, that cable controlled all the cameras on that particular set. This means that the studio had to spend multiple hours fixing it and cancelling the recording they had planned for that evening, throwing off the entire week's schedule. Which landed me as an intern for the sadistic Chris.

I guess it was kinda my fault huh? But I still don't deserve to be this man's personal slave do I?

I sighed, oh well, I'm here and I might as well suck it up. Besides, I have Scott on my side so Chris lays off on certain tortures for me. He still used me as target practice for the tranquilizer guns but I got a six hour nap out of the deal right?

I smiled and took off my worn fedora, straightening the silk band and rubbing a smudge of dirt off my "You wish you were this awesome" pin. I'd had this hat for four years, got it when I was 14. I had dubbed it Lucy after my grandma and rarely took it off. I'm still surprised it hasn't fallen apart yet.

"Shio? Where are you?" I looked down through the branches and smiled at the sight of blond hair. I jumped down and landed right in front of my best friend, making him clutch his chest.

"Geez Shio, you scared me!"

"Sorry Scott," I smirked and the cameraman rolled his eyes.

"The campers are arriving and Chris assigned you to baggage duty for the boy's cabin," he said and I put an arm around his slim shoulders.

"Okay and I am allowed to drool over the guys if I want to right?" Scott chuckled.

"Only if you don't gag at me for staring at Chris," I squeezed his shoulder.

"I don't know what you see in him but why would I gag?"

"Oh please, I saw you making rude gestures behind Chris when he was talking to me yesterday!" I looked away from his accusing glare. Like I could help it, they were the sappiest couple ever.

"All in good fun Scotty," I smirked and he rolled his eyes yet again.

"Okay, I need to get ready to film, you be ready to carry bags with what's his name over there," he gestured vaguely to a curly haired intern before jogging to the dock to film our arriving contestants. I brushed some leaves off my vest and t-shirt before stuffing my hands in my pockets and ambling over to my fellow intern, he was shaking.

"You okay man?" I asked and he nodded, hair flopping and he was wringing his hands.

"He almost got me for the cannon before he spotted someone flirting with that blond cameraman, he got tested instead, I didn't see if he made it okay," he said fearfully. I smirked; nobody messed with Scott, usually ended up with them in the hospital. I'll give Chris one thing, he was protective of his lover.

"Oh look, the campers are coming," he pointed at a boat that was approaching the dock.

"Bet I can tell who will win this competition," I watched the boat with mild interest and my companion snorted.

"Yeah right, how could you tell something like that?" I just shrugged, I'd been tested and was technically a genius but I didn't like to flaunt it. Heck, I didn't even really care, although it did help score me an A average without trying which meant more free time. That's good right?

"I just can," I smiled as the boat dropped off the first camper, she was nerdy but I almost laughed as she jumped up to hug Chris. I wish I was close enough to hear what they were saying but interns must remain off-screen at all times.

"She'll last awhile," I nodded and Curly looked at me shocked.

"That nerd? She won't last through the first challenge!" I rolled my eyes, he'd be surprised what we nerds can do, I rubbed my pocketknife with my thumb.

The next two campers arrived and I licked my lips as a tall, buff, chocolate cutie walked up to Chris with a brilliant smile. Oh, me and him could make such good chocolate-covered fortune cookies together!

"I really hope he lasts awhile," I said and I think by this point Curly was ignoring me.

A goth girl was right behind my cutie and she didn't look as happy as him, big shocker.

"She'll be in the final three at least," I predicted and Curly nodded.

"She's hot," he muttered and I shook my head.

And next up were two blondes. The guy was pretty cute but I wasn't really into partiers and the girl seemed to be the average bimbo. They'd probably be popular and last awhile too though I didn't really care. My eyes strayed back to the cutie who if I remembered correctly from the roster Scott had shown me, his name was DJ.

Oh and look the Wicked Witch of Wawanakwa had arrived! I'm almost sad to share the same ancestry as her, hopefully she was Korean and not Japanese like me.

My eyes snapped to the newest camper when I heard the loud music and I couldn't stop my jaw from dropping. Mmm, I loved bad boys. And green mohawks are so sexy. Although by the look of his glare, he'd be more likely to gang bang me than be a potential lover. I could still drool over him though.

The next few campers came and other than that awesome crash by (I think) Tyler and a cute bookworm in a red sweater, I didn't really pay attention until an abnormally large guy arrived and started yelling loud enough that I could hear him even from where I stood.

"Yep, he'll win," I nodded and Curly looked at me with a glare.

"Sure he will dude, if he wins, I'll eat my shorts," he crossed his arms and turned his gaze back to the docks, I smirked.

"Hope you like denim then," I said and grinned as the last of the campers arrived and Chris urged them all to take a photo. That is, until the dock broke. I rolled my eyes, Chris was so mean.

As the campers, got out of the water and started drying off, me and Curly went towards the unbroken side of the dock to get the campers bags.

"Hey dude, what's your name anyway?" I asked as we started carting armfuls of luggage towards the cabins, I tried to make eye contact with some of the cuties and got a smile from DJ that made me glow.

"It's Jack," he said with a frown, clearly not in the mood to talk, I rolled my eyes, I think I preferred Curly; it was stupid just like him.

-

I sighed as I got the last of the bags put into place, thank goodness Scott had shown me who would be on what team or I think Chris would have just let us guess or put all the bags in a pile for the campers to sort. I was working for a sadist.

I heard Jack grumble as he stalked off to do his next task, I hope Chris assigned him to feed the sharks.

I ambled to the door when all of the sudden it opened and campers poured in, including my chocolate cutie and the bad boy. Lucky me.

"Excuse me boys, I'm not supposed to be here," I smirked and tried to push past them and yes, I admit I tried to brush against DJ, can you blame me?

"Who are you?" DJ smiled at me cutely, can I keep him please?

"A nameless intern," I bowed grandly, taking off my hat, I heard someone gasp over my white hair, "Who really needs to get back to work," I smiled.

"I like your hat," DJ said.

"Thanks, her name's Lucy," I patted the hat and put it back on my head lovingly, DJ laughed.

"Nice, I like your hair too,"

"It's natural," I winked and once again, made for the door, Duncan snorted.

"Right, what are you part-albino or something?" I looked at him, he was picking at his nails with a knife. A knife similar to mine actually.

"No, I was born in the pool of the Moon Goddess which caused my hair to be turned white," I said seriously and crossed my arms, waiting for Duncan to laugh, which he did.

"And let me guess, you're the Goddess' rightful heir?" he snorted, eyes watering in mirth. I smirked.

"I was really hoping you wouldn't have to die mortal, but you discovered my secret," I grinned, flipping Duncan off, winking at DJ and going out the door.

I began walking, intending to find Scott so I could get a safe task instead of one of Chris' suicide missions.

"Hey!" I turned and was surprised to see Duncan stalking after me, a glare on his face.

"What was that about me dying?" he asked and I mentally rolled my eyes.

"It is called a joke mortal; surely you have heard of the concept?" I stuffed my hands in my pockets.

"Yeah, I've heard of jokes," he crossed his arms and I couldn't help noticing the muscles beneath his shirt. "But you seemed to insinuate that you could kill me or something," he smirked and his eyes roamed over my slim frame, my hand curled around my knife.

"Like a priss like you could take me, you'd probably worry about chipping a nail," he chuckled and in an instant, I had grabbed him and had my blade at his throat.

"Oh really?" I smiled as he struggled against my hold on him, "Don't underestimate me Duncan," I growled darkly, looking at him from under Lucy's brim, his eyes were clouded over, with what emotion I couldn't tell.

I released him and he rubbed his wrists, glaring at me with what seemed to be grudging respect.

"Where'd you learn that?" he asked.

"My dad is a ninja," I smiled and he rolled his eyes, "Meaning a karate teacher," I elaborated and he nodded.

"Alright, well I need to get to the mess hall," he blushed, apparently embarrassed he was beaten by a "priss" (I am not a priss by the way, I'm uber cool)

"And Chris probably needs me to feed the dinosaur or something," I sighed and Duncan looked at me.

"Dinosaur?" I grinned and put a finger over my lips.

"Shh," I winked and began walking away.

"Dude, what's your name or are you really nameless intern?"

"Horatio Takanori," I called over my shoulder and smiled.

"Seeya Shio," Duncan said, I turned and watched him walk away, cute ass. And he figured out my nickname instantly? Hmm, maybe there was more to this bad boy then met the eye?

DJ may be adorable but he most likely couldn't even hold a knife, let alone fight with one. Duncan however may prove a challenge.

Maybe I'd have to keep my eye on him.

You know, for safety's sake.

Being an intern may not be so bad afterall.

888

And there's my introduction to Horatio. Now that that's done, I can finally start writing actual fics with this pair. Although I got to admit, I like Horatio/DJ also, what do you think?

Gah, another late night writing, what else is new.

Please review.

Happy Reading

Whirl