Figure Head

I don't own Kingdom Hearts, but as my name may tell you, I am a fan that's spent literally three hundred hours on the games.

I wish to God I owned Kingdom Hearts series.

But I don't.

Contrary to popular belief Xigbar was no fool. Sure, even Xigbar will tell you Braig had his idiotic moments, but that was a totally different person. The plan was complex and intricate. Braig didn't understand. Xigbar cursed him for not seeing the possibilities. First it was all for the cause of the tech and power. The war brought so many new things, like most do. What would another war bring? To Braig, war meant power. He sold his soul to the creepy geezer with the goatee who happened to have a fetish for kids/teens/keys. So what? He'd already done worse for the sake of number one.

Then that geezer's plans suddenly got less fun and became deadly. Braig could handle deadly, but the sudden necessary switch caught him off guard when the coot changed the plan a tiny bit without telling him. He was to fake holding the old man to crush that Terra punk's spirit, no big deal. Then suddenly he was vulnerable. He lost an eye and came out scarred by darkness. Nothing would heal wounds like those, nothing. He was mad of course, who wouldn't be after losing a fucking eye? But then the old man pulled the floor out from under him. He was too wrapped up in it now.

But the plan took more turns. Soon the three musketeers in all their keybladed glory were taking on him, the coot (Xehanort), and the coots broken toy soldier (Vanitas). Afterwards he would look back and wonder where it all went wrong. He wouldn't figure it out until after he lost his own heart and gained new perspective. Those keybladers were fighting for the only things left for them, each other. No wonder the coot and his masked boy had lost. But not all their work was for naught. Terra was absorbed, but somehow or another, things went wrong from there.

That boy Ventus took on Vanitas, creating the X-Blade. No doubt about it their goal was in sight. Then boom, the factor they hadn't planned for, the girl. She managed to beat him. HE could NOT believe it. So she managed to somehow un-stabilize the X-blade. He scrammed after that. Their reinforcements had arrived in the form of that troublesome mouse. But Xehanort had come through… partly.

When he first discovered that Xehanort had really lost his memory and was not faking with another slight tweak in the plans Braig was ready to dedicate the rest of his life to hunting down the four people who ruined his life. That girl, that Punk (He had to be out there somewhere), that boy the X-blade, and then Xehanort, because he had to be inside the amnesiac body in front of him somewhere, in some way! But then he realized as he thought these thoughts that the plan was not over. Here was his part to bring it to the next level, whether the geezer and X-blade were there or not. That Ansem bloke took in Xehanort. Yes… he could use this….

Xigbar claims Braig's greatest stroke of genius was being the one that managed to corrupt Xehanorts amnesiac mind while it was still nothing but jumped up memories. Taking over bodies is a difficult thing as old creepy dudes everywhere will attest. Between the eternally warring souls of Terra and Xehanort forced into one body neither of them could influence the third mind that replaced both of the two warring ones. However, Braig could. He got close to Xehanort easily. Ansem the Wise knew better than to trust the Scarred boy Braig, but he also didn't mind him being around. So, he let Braig and the amnesiac Xehanort commune. 'What was the worst Braig could do?' Ansem asked himself one day. He decided Braig would either teach Xehanort street smarts or just be a sleazy lifelong friend. He had no idea of what Braig was really doing. What he KNEW.

So everything worked fine. Braig was good friends with the two guards Aeleus and Dilan, acknowledged as a friend/hate relationship with the scientist Even, and something of an odd idol for the young Ienzo. (Let me remind you Ienzo was a young boy who read a lot of books far past his age. Ienzo knew the scarred ones were the survivors, and was always wary of Braig despite wanting to someday have that kind of power.)

So he got as close as he could to his amnesiac boss and new nemesis. He then began to whisper in the ears of everyone in the castle but Ansem himself. Things that go thump in the night, dark desires, and an unusual thirst for power and knowledge from everyone in the castle. Braig considered it something of a personal challenge. He was going to make the best out of the broken plans the way he knew best, make something of a mob.

But as he whispered the very same promises of the heart into Xehanort as Xehanort had once whispered into him something seemed to shrift inside the tanned anomaly. Braig figured his hand had altered the inner battle in favor of the old coot over Terra. Xehanort began to remember small snippets. His hunger was awoken again. The awakened Xehanort quickly set about absorbing himself in his master's work, looking for the things humanity prized, and best of all, Braig hadn't even needed to push to Xehanort in the right direction! Finally Xehanort took lead again! Braig had been another week away from just spilling the beans the amnesiac, consequences be damned.

Now all Braig had to do was lay back and pretend he hadn't started it all when Xehanort came back to him and asked what it all meant like he knew all the answers. Easy for Braig. Easy for someone who had to learn the hard way a lie you can't keep or back up was death. Or worse, for he grew up in the underbelly and festering darkness of 'Radiant Garden.' Xigbar had lost his innocent and childhood to the darkness no-one would talk about in the depths of the 'perfect world.' He was the child parents would tell their kids to avoid. Braig was the unwanted orphan, the ones who lived their entire lives in darkness. It was little surprise he had been wanting power. Power to control his life.

But as Braig quickly learned, dangling answers in the face of a hungry amnesiac was like pouring gasoline on fire. If anything his lies and truth skimming brought the already interested Xehanort to levels of unheard of ravenousness. And so Xehanort was reborn again, not through the plan, or Terra, but through Braig, the one in the shadows.

Shortly afterwards Xehanort further corrupted himself for knowledge. The fact Ansem forbade it only made him want it MORE. Braig was proud to the point of tears to see Xehanort had already corrupted Ienzo, Even, Aeleus, and Dilan months before Braig was planning to. The one went to two, and then jumped to six. And it was going smoothly. The next steps deviated so far from the plan that Braig was concerned they were venturing into new territory. After all, the Heartless were a bit like the unversed, but these Nobodies were new and unfamiliar. Braig was comfortable with the old, accustomed to being the one with all the answers and tells nothing. After all, what were Heartless but slightly weaker Unversed? Apparently as Xehanort, Ienzo, and Even told him; much more. All Braig, Aeleus, and Dilan wanted to know was how to kill them.

Things went out of Braigs court for a long time after that. But….he was beginning to trust the group of people around him. He was still willing to shoot them in the throat and teleport away, but he knew they actually were being totally straight with him. This was all new for them too.

When the day came that they were found out Braig was concerned he'd have to shoot the old man Ansem. Surprisingly it was Ienzo that just told them to continue in the basement. In Dilan's words, "Holy fuck, there's a basement in this maze?" In Even's words, "Why were we not doing this earlier?" In Aelues's words, (A great feat) "Hmph". In Xehanorts words, "Let us continue. We must not let anything stop our search for the truth of Kingdom hearts." That was a new term for Braig. Kingdom Hearts…. He had a gut feeling he'd be finding out a lot more about that soon enough.

Soon came the day that everything Braig knew changed once again. The day of the dive. All six of them. They bathed themselves in darkness. They emerged anew and powerful beyond belief. Xehanort traded his name for Ansem. But it was not without cost. In exchange for their new power and weapons that came from the nothingness they lost everything to the nothingness. And for a long while it stayed like that.

Some immediate side effects were observed in all six. Lack of heartbeat. Lack of blood actually. They were exponentially stronger than when they went in, which made Xehanort/Ansem a fricken god power wise. They all had their natural powers and magic enhanced. A new found resistance to darkness. Lack of emotions. Lack of general being. Braig could now utilize his teleportation powers better, and they quickly evolved into something akin to total spatial control. Aeleus, Even, and Dilan got elemental powers along with more bling on their weapons. Ienzo got the only power that would actually enable him to be even more creepy. Total mind control, hallucinations, perfect hypnotism, and a great boost to the sense of smell for some damn reason. But most interesting of all was that Xehanort didn't seem to have anything new. That is, until he ripped a hole to another dimension in the air. Seriously, even the geezer Xehanort hadn't been able to do that!

They spent months adjusting to their new…everything. The absences eventually started getting suspicions as Ansem the Genuine discovered his guards were gone. For some reason we never counted on him poking his head out the front door. Seemed like the guy had never left the castle, once, for any reason in the entire history of Radiant Garden. The townies didn't even know what he looked like for god's sakes, but he was their divine ruler anyways.

So then came the problem of Ansem discovering the secret labs in the basement, which apparently only Ienzo had known about prior. (Damned if he knew how. Braig had just been concerned about not being able to use his catch phrase for like… a year.)

So, this massive problem of their master discovering their secret lab was quite the freakin' surprise. He walked in one day looking lost and a bit panicked, relaxed for a second when he saw all six of us, then went into heart attack mode when he realized that hey, there was darkness flowing out of a vat behind us. Also a machine that Even made in his spare time that was able to create synthetic heartless for no other reason that he was bored. (He had already discovered the cure for the common cold.)

So everything went down then and there. The old man was ready to put up a fight but then Xehanort totally went god powers on Ansem. Then he tossed Ansem into the pit of darkness just long enough to almost make him a nobody. Painful that. He destroyed the heartless in the presence of the nobody, which was then sorta' absorbed into Ansem's non-being. He was a new hybrid. Even was about to squeal at the possibilities before Ansem the God threw Ansem the Old into a different Dimension or whatever the nothingness was. I had a gut feeling we would be seeing him again though.

For a good long while the trio nerds continued their experiments. Somehow or another boredom still existed in one who had lost all emotions, so the other three of us went about surveying the worlds in these snazzy new cloaks Even, Ansem, and Ienzo had all put their heads together into making. Despite looking absolutely cult/awesome they also allowed you to travel in the dark corridors of the heartless. Let it never be said Braig did not appreciate science, despite his habit of picking on Even.

One day something snapped in Ansem the Fake again. He decided he was going to build a super cult of nobodies. Dilan asked how many we would have. We debated and laughed about it until Ienzo came up with thirteen. When asked why he said it's because that's how many witches are in a coven. We stared at the creepy motherfucker until he went back to his book (and a good deal longer after that) until Aeleus grunted 'why the heck not?' a sure sign he approved heavily of anything Ienzo did.

Then Ansem rolled out the rules to the frat party. New names to help us identify to our new bodies and non-identities. And so Ansem/Xehanort faded to make Mansex. (Xemnas) Braig became Xigbar or Xiggy for cute. (Never underestimate the power of cute. Xigbar learned this from *Ahem*Aqua*Cough*) Dilan became Xaldin. Even became Vexen, which didn't sound different if you say it ten times fast. Aeleus traded his named for Lexeus which for the next half hour we tried to spell without him telling us before Ienzo told us we had to use the same letters of his first name. (Xigbar swore the only reason Ienzo was a scientist was because he was observatent and had common sense, whereas Xemnas was biblical science and Vexen was nuclear engineer/mad chemist) Ienzo swapped for Zexion, which admittedly sounded Badass for a little kid. Then Zexion threatened Xigbar with Mindrape if he ever tried to alter his name in any way. That day the term Zexxy was coined and Xigbar learned to not underestimate the power of Mindfuck.

Years rolled by before anything big happened. Two boys came in. Braig remembered them from when he was stalking the punk trio. Xigbar smelled opportunities. The boys had basically come in on a dare and the others they were with had chickened out. At the time there were exactly six Nobodies. So they revealed the mansions secrets with temptations of power without even revealing themselves from Zexion's shadow cloak spell. The boys came back like moth to a flame. They learned more and saw more. The temptation increased. Soon the six actually revealed themselves to the boys. The two were surprised, but they knew the six had been there all along.

And so they tricked two boys to take the dive for power. They did it in a slightly safer way, sure. The results were the same. Axel and Saix were made. They didn't adapt as well as us though. The blunette, Saix basically lost the will to live. The redhead Axel only wanted shorter amusement. They craved their missing hearts. And soon, to Zigbar's horror, they made the others miss themselves too. Only he and Xemnas were unaffected. Xemnas avoided missing what couldn't be recovered by having no past and a great lust for power. Xigbar avoided this by being the one of all the secrets.

Soon as worlds began to suffer more nobodies were born. They weren't strong like the eight, but they were useful and bendable pawns to their schemes. Not that they even had a clear goal at the moment, thank you very much. The heartless ran rampant. They moved their base to the Netherworld. More heartless=more Nobodies. Soon their numbers reached nine with the addition of Demyx, a mullet clad hipster with a Sitar for a weapon. Still, he was a good operative. Who would expect the whiny scaredy cat to attack from behind and drain all the liquid your cells needed from your shriveled husk of a body? Not that any of them had missions yet. Demyx also missed his heart, proof he had none and was just playing extremely well. So one day Xemnas and Vexen discovered that heartless actually spat out hearts after observing files from Ansem that showed Keyblade users fighting shadowy beings. Kingdom Hearts was discovered.

Finally, things were back where Xigbar knew the ground well! Keyblades! He pushed and prodded his leader to shove the scientists the right way. After all X-Blade would be like this Kingdom Hearts right? Right?

It was a learning Experience for Xigbar to say the least when Vexen came up with a theory that would get their hearts back.

Needless to say Xigbar didn't care about his heart. Neither did Xemnas. But Kingdom hearts could be used per say, to gain a great deal of power. So they studied. And for a while things were stuck again. Two things happened at about the same time. They gained their Number ten and the Keyblade wielder was found again.

Luxord was a man with a plan. The plan? Booze, Gambling, Money, Panties, whatever else, Hearts. In that order. A man after Xigbar's own non-heart indeed. Perhaps their similar powers, background, and funky hairstyles were the cause? Or maybe it was just the booze. Maybe.

Surprise surprise, Xigbar knew the wielder. It was a kid he spotted when he was stalking Terra, Ven, and Aqua. He also knew the dirty little secret. The wielder wasn't the correct wielder. By that point there was that pesky other organization made up of Heartless enthusiasts who wanted the dark power. They watched the progress of the keyhole. Numbers Ten, Nine, and Six were sent in to copy and steal all information they knew about the keyblade.

It was things they already knew, just put in a way that somehow who didn't know Latin could understand. The talk of keys, fate, and ancient cults that sounded a bit like Jedi and Sith that used keyblades to war each other was something that escaped Braig. Xigbar was no fool.

And so they gained members Eleven and Twelve while observing the Keyblade user and The cult watching the Keyblade user. Who watches the Watchmen, eh? Eleven was a Manly man with a broad chest, a thing for young girls, and a strange want for the keyblade with similar motives to Xemnas. For the first hour Xigbar knew him however, he laughed so hard he thought he must've gained a heart purely for the occasion. The man had pink hair! His power was Flower petals! He had a power based off the Genitalia of Flora for god's sake! (As soon as he announced this and got stared akin to him declaring he was a flaming homosexual he realized he needed to spend less time around Vexen and more time drunk)

It wasn't until their first mission together that Marluxia stopped trying to kill Xigbar. Once they fought some heartless did Xigbar see Marluxia didn't use his powers anyways, he killed things with the mega fucking scythe that Xiggy speculated was over compensating for something. Xiggy ditched when Marluxia and him found the boss heartless they were sent to eliminate before the other group of villains found it. That's when Xigbar saw his powers. Somehow or another Rose petals equaled control over plant matter. It didn't matter it was summer in Agribah. If there weren't plants for light-years within range the planet, make your own plants! Shortly after Marluxia did this Xigbar saw the next secret of Marluxia's power. Just like petals somehow equaled plants, Plants somehow equaled darkness. That's right; Marluxia's power was petals, plants, and darkness.

Number twelve was no laughing matter however. The only female in the group was turned from an unattractive girl who received the darkness and evils of a shy girl of that age that was mocked ruthlessly by her peers because she was secretly prettier than them all was transformed into the meanest bitch on the planet. Xigbar figured there might be a connection between evil peers and bad attitude in the second life. Maybe it was the booze. Maybe.

For the first couple days she was reserved and quite. Then she snapped out of her old life funk and unleashed horrible life threatening pain on everyone. Even Mansex was not immune to the harsh power of lightening. Mullet boy Demyx had it worst, for some reason. It might have something to do with his fake clumsiness that somehow eventually became genuine clumsiness that made him slip one day and grab not one, but both of Larxene's breasts. In front of everyone. Mansex was the only thing keeping the blond from castrating the other blonde and then making him die the most painful death imaginable and then some. Still, Xigbar had never seen Xemnas shake so much in his life, non being or otherwise.

But it was not until the arrival of Sora in hollow bastion that real progress was made. Sora held Ven's X-Blade heart and a girl named Kairi, a girl reminiscent of Aqua and a maiden of pure light. This was enough to make Xigbar realize if he had a heart it would be beating in terror. Then the boy named Riku came into the equation. Sure Xigbar knew he was out there somewhere, but it never occurred to him that Riku would be just like Terra. Damn Fate and her Fastballs.

But what was really surprising was what happened next. As all twelve members stealthily watched from the shadows Sora doggedly tried to fight Riku. (Who seemed far superior, but did not apparently have Sora's infinite energy and Paladin quality light.) Finally Riku disappeared into a void. Sora stabbed himself in the chest, created the Oblivion Keyblade chain in the world, and also restored Kairi to sentience. Did we mention he also created a nobody after becoming a heartless for an astonishing one minute?

It was quite literally an hour later Zexion's energy reserves for his spell of invisibility fell off us, yet there we were sitting, gawking, and collectively shitting our non-existence selves at what the fuck did we just witness. That was seven kinds of godly intervention and just plain stupid according to all the science we of the original six had placed down. Finally it was Lexaeus who spoke out. "We should probably find that nobody."

Ten of us continued to drool. Vexen was having some kind of orgasmic hissy-fit seizure, so Mansex and I left him alone. "We've got to find that nobody! If it has the keyblade it will speed up production by three times!" I spoke through the haze of WTFOMGBBQ. "I will find him. You get the other home." Xemnas told Xigbar.

Xemnas warped away and Xigbar returned to see a very confused looking man in a dark cloak with an angle wing sprouting out of his back. He also had an impossibly long sword. Just by looking at it you could tell he didn't have arms long enough to actually pull the blade free of the sheathe without ripping part of it. "Can I help you Sir?" Xigbar asked the confused man. "You. Hooded one. Have I missed the universe shaking event that was supposed to happen here today?" the man asked. "Ugh, yes by I'd say an hour and ten minutes." Xigbar told the man. "Drat. Here I needed something to flaunt Cloud with. Very well, goodbye."

Xigbar shook this off and returned the others home via Spatial powers.

Half a week later Roxas was brought to the Organization, blank as the day Xiggy had found Xehanort-Terra. What was odd was what both he and Xemnas could feel. The boy had a heart. Not just any heart, but the heart of Ventus. Xemnas knew it and felt it, but couldn't remember. But Xigbar knew. He knew without a doubt that Roxas could, and would wield the keyblade.

Within the month a change was brought upon Xemnas. Xigbar decided it was due to Ansem the Heartless being destroyed. Xigbar had been there to witness it, making sure Xemnas was totally unaware at the same time though. It looked like it might not matter and it would all come crashing down on his head. With the Heartless Ansem that remembered everything gone the memories that seemed jumbled and confused were beginning to fix. Xemnas was remembering a little.

The next couple weeks flew by. Xemnas had stopped remembering. They found Namine who was some sort of witch who could influence Sora's memories. She was born of Kairi being carried in Sora's heart, and then being released while going back to Kairi. She was even more special then Roxas. Roxas seemed to gather together a personality while Xigbar watched with his one eye carefully. Members Four, Five, Six, Eight, Eleven, Twelve were dispatched to Castle oblivion, where Sora was de-powered, mind raped, and given an attitude readjustment. Xigbar and the Superior knew full well that Eleven and Twelve were traitors. They didn't want hearts, they wanted the power, but they didn't want to share it. So then they were like one, two, three, four, and ten.

Xigbar and Xemnas also knew that Saix was actually a little bit of a rebel himself, getting close to the Superior to benefit himself and Axel, whom he secretly looked out for despite having no emotions and thus no reason. Especially when Axel had forsaken him for not missing his heart. Guess again, flame boy, he misses it's heart but he accepts it's not there and is willing to trade his freedom and pride to keep you and him safe, and you don't care or know. Little wonder Saix went insane so quick.

But when Xigbar and Xemnas got reports that all but eight had perished they didn't buy it. There had never been a force that could topple Lexaeus. Not even Larxene. Vexen dead? Oh well, by now he's sure to have come back to un-life. Zexion vanquished? Lies and trickery, that's just what he wants you to think. They were in the original six for god's sake. Some pubescent kids with developing powers and amnesia weren't a match. Twelve dead? Oh now that's entirely different matter. For the first time they had to think, do we replace? Eleven dead? That's some pretty decent strength right there on that Keyblade wielder. Axel the only one to return? Yup, he's secretly homicidal. Freakin' Pyro's messing our crap up.

And so Sora went to sleep and forgot all the events of castle oblivion. Well, that's another wrench in our plans. Thank you very much, don't come back again; Fate. Riku now working with Diz, which was seriously a bad codename for Ansem when you admitted to your Lovable Apprentices that you soaked those weird names up. Even Demyx would have spotted it if he were one of the six. That brought about the question of, hey, what happened to our older much more powerful enemies? To Xigbar's mind. A bit of searching and he managed to steal Aqua's armor and thus her Keyblade, which he stashed in a Secret, Secret room that Xehanort had operated out of in Radiant Garden. The only way anyone would find those is if Xemnas got all his memories back. In which case Xigbar would probably not have to worry about where Aqua was at currently. He'd already tracked Ven's body down to the inside of castle oblivion. It used to be known as the Land of Departure. There, Ven was taking a power nap that put Sora's to shame.

Terra was Xehanorts body. He had no idea what that even employed anymore. He'd stop keeping track after the third name change. Eraqus was dead. Finally, a permanent outcome! Now to keep the skeletons locked up tight. Oh yes, and convincing the members four five and six to come out. Them dead? Who's bloody freakin' army? Hah. No, those three weren't going anywhere or dead.

And then that girl Xion, who was nothing more than a memory dump for Sora who could wield the keyblade because Sora's wasn't using his right now managed to go Rogue. That also left a scary thought many days later when Xigbar discovered Roxas could Dual wield after Xion inevitable broke. He could use two keyblades at once! Before Xion Roxas either was using the keyblade Sora used or was using the regular keyblade Ven used, except holding it in a way that actually could be used to fight.

Shortly after Roxas went batshit he was torn down from the height of his strength by Riku. Damn that kid needed to go! And go he did. He took Roxas and ran to a place we had no clue about or any leads. Naturally Xemnas and Xigbar sent Axel because they enjoyed screwing with him knowing the first thing Ansem would do to ensure they couldn't find his was erase his memories again. What they didn't expect was for Roxas to begin transferring Xion's and his Memories back into Sora like a backup disk of memory and files. That was new innovative nobodies right there!

Still no word about the three of the six. Not like we're looking. If a master of hypnosis didn't want to be found you would not find him. If it's a nobody with size and strength that shames bears, no scout would ever deliver their message alive. Xigbar wasn't even sure what Vexen could and could not do. It was best not to prod insane scientists. Poor Dilan had once crossed and angry Even who currently didn't have a lab rat for a dangerous looking chemical/medicine/toxic waste. Dilan had looked funny when he somehow turned into the opposite gender and suddenly Even wanted to dissect.

Xigbar watched as slowly Keyblade users ruined his best laid plans again. And then one fateful day Sora woke up with Roxas living as a voice in his head. And everything went to hell. The first time they had seen the boy since they watched him stab himself while smiling at Donald and Goofy.

Xigbar talked to Sora personally to figure out just what was going on with the kid. He bore the tell tale signs of growing in stasis, such as infinite energy. There was probably tumors in his feet or something to make them that large. His soul was one part Sora, one part Roxas, one part Ven. He probably hadn't noticed Ven seeing as he was asleep and Roxas was just a quiet soul. Carrying Kairi however must have made him occasionally think he was tripping.

Xigbar had seen enough, and left. The next time he saw Sora was when he hugged him and called him Riku. That was a little off. Xigbar wanted to Arrow gun him in the head but that would be detrimental to the rate Kingdom hearts was growing. Shortly after Saix decided to be a bleeding heart and tell the kid our dirty little secret of heart harvesting. Sora almost died and gave up to the heartless before Maleficent saved him. Dammnit now even the dead don't stay dead. How long until others show up! Answer: Oogey Boogey.

And then they lost Demyx. He'd told them he wasn't the man for the job, hadn't he? Just because Xemnas wanted to get him to talk to Roxas through Sora? No wonder Sora thinks we're insane psycho's even though he's running around killing shadow beings with a key the size of a sword. Soon it'll be the X- Blade all over again.

Next to go was Xaldin? Okay, now, what the bloody Hell? As if! (Finally!) There's no way that Xaldin fell to Sora, a beast, and the kind's lackeys! Not possible! It became a bit more clear after Mickey was revealed to have fought alongside Sora and the lackeys. Still farfetched, but still there. Xaldin didn't have the powers to make a convincing getaway like people nearby Zexion. Perhaps Zexion did save him? No…maybe that lot is even more powerful that before….that's a scary thought.

Axel goes rogue? Over Kairi? Now that's just plain….What kind of emotionless Nobody are you! Did you hang around Roxas and Xion for so long you actually… is that possible?

And then Sora knew how to get to the city that never was? Really Axel? That's low even for the member that kills other members. These Nobodies are getting worse I swear. So Xemnas and Xigbar sent out the whole load of Nobodies the swarm size that even Sora won't get through. Then Axel nukes them all in all his nobody glory and claims that Sora made him feel. So paradox. Now I'm going to have to step up to the plate and defend my crib.

He beat. ME? I am number two! I am the one who lead before there was something to lead! Even though he beat me I refuse to fade! Using spatial powers I teleported but covered my exit like I was dying. See, so easy that any of the original regular six should've been able to do it. I watch as Sora fell to his death at the hands of… Luxord? Nope. He even somehow put his gambling addiction into fighting. That was the trippiest battle of all time, but really? You could've stopped time and cut him to shreds and instead you play poker and blackjack with him?

Useless British time lord.

Well at least Saix the berserk will defiantly take his anger out on Sora after he killed so many of us and Axel and Roxas. And….did Sora just disarm Saix while he was in crazy mode and the full moon was out? Perhaps I need to change Sora's title from annoying false key wielder to potential universe changing keyblader. Those guys always were too good at screwing up plans. At some point Sora and Xemnas just disappeared off the roof. I was ready and expecting to see Xemnas drop a head on the ground but no… even he lost. This organization is total bullshit. No really, I build something and some kid with a key can tear it down?

Then Xemnas turned into a gigantic warrior in armor. I didn't know he could do that. He could steal all our weapons. I knew he could do that, it was practically the only reason Larxene let any of us live.

Alright, but at least the warrior will…nope…now it's a sky dragon…. This is getting weird. Time to head to the secret bunker and just figure out how to operate that secret member rebuilding machine Vexen invented a while back…..