Disclaimer: Not mine.
AN: The Postman in Twilight Princess terrifies me. The idea that he might be following me across the land is nightmare-worthy. In real life, hearing "Waaaaait!" makes me want to run as fast as I can because my instincts tell me some strange man in short shorts is about to try and give me something useless. Anyway, that just needed to be said. Now, enjoy.
Prologue: Off Down Memory Lane
Link regarded the letter and pamphlet in his hand as if the documents carried a pox. In a way, they did. Because of those messages, the Postman had been hounding him for days; simply trying to do his job and deliver them, yes, but also running the poor hero ragged.
There had been no peace, no rest, as the cry of "Waaaaaait!" followed him across Hyrule Field. Link would not wait, so the Postman all but hunted him in order to fulfill his duty. Eventually the dedicated civil servant managed to deliver the parcels by lying in wait atop a bluff and leaping down onto Epona as Link rode past. That was sure surprising.
The letter, bearing the Royal Seal of Hyrule, was a missive from Princess Zelda requesting his service. He was to look over the accompanying pamphlet and give his opinion on it. The pamphlet, Link found, was flyer advertising Castle Town as a travel destination.
According to the rest of her letter, the princess wanted to begin bolstering tourism within her realm and she thought Link the best person to consult on the pamphlet's design, thanks to his familiarity with the city and the fact that he didn't live there.
Link thought she was being very abnormal, and could only imagine that Zelda had made such a decision under the influence of Telma's strongest ale, but took a quick gander at the pamphlet anyway.
It was a simple, trifold sheet of paper printed with a scene of the castle and central plaza. Across the front of the pamphlet ran the long-winded slogan: 'Castle Town: Gentle townsfolk, safe within their walls, protected by brave souls, under the rule of a kind princess.'
It went on to describe how the "bustling metropolis" was a perfect vacation spot nearby "scenic Lake Hylia," but Link couldn't keep his attention focused long enough to read it. Instead he jotted a short message on the back of the princess' stationary about a necessary addition and the need for honesty, then handed it back to the Postman, cynical memories of his experiences in the city overwhelming him even as the letter left his hand.
AN: Next chapter... A fashionable, horrible, experience for our poor hero!