Title: Someday Shine Together
Disclaimer: Don't own Gundam Wing, don't own Quatre or Trowa (wish I did), don't own the song "Desert Rose" either.
Warning: Shonen Ai, lots of it. Oh, yeah, and plenty of angst, and.... MUUUUSH!!
Dedication: (sap warning) This fic is for my beloved and beautiful Rose Princess - for she does not know how hard it will be for her Prince to leave. (end sap)
Trowa sat up in his bed; He hadn't slept in weeks. The insomnia was killing him. But it wasn't exactly the insomnia itself that caused him the most pain. It was the reason he couldn't sleep. Every time he closed his eyes, there was Quatre...almost as if he were tattooed to his eyelids. Why couldn't he stop thinking about him? He sighed and fell back onto his pillow, hands behind his head. Was he just lonely...or did he really love Quatre?
/It has been a long time
/And I am looking for myself and my loved one
*
Quatre opened his eyes. He had another dream about Trowa. The dreams were becoming more frequent now; almost every night he would have a dream about Trowa. Not that the dreams weren't pleasant - quite the contrary, he loved the dreams. But, wished they were real; he didn't want to only see him in dreams...he wanted to hold him now.
/It has been a long time
/And I am looking for myself and my loved one
*
Trowa stared at the ceiling. The days and nights he spent with Quatre ran through his mind non-stop. The battles, the times he spent at Quatre's beautiful estate, the sorrowful goodbye after the war. He didn't want to say goodbye; it was a decision he made, and now a decision he regretted.
/I dream of rain
/I dream of gardens in the desert sand
*
Quatre hugged his pillow. Why didn't Trowa want to stay with him? When Quatre offered him to stay with him, Trowa declined. Then Quatre held back the tears so Trowa would not see him cry. But now, he wished he had shown Trowa his pain, for now, he could not hold back the tears.
/I wake in pain
/I dream of love as time runs through my hand.
/I dream of fire
/Those dreams are tied to a horse that will never tire
*
Trowa closed his eyes. Quatre's image played in his mind. All he could see was the young Arabian's figure moving across the blackness and confusion of his soul. The look in Quatre's eyes when Trowa last saw him haunted him - he knew the sorrow Quatre felt and how he tried to hide it. He felt almost guilty as he lay there with his eyes closed, gazing into the eyes of a tortured shadow that was not there.
/And in the flames
/His shadows play in the shape of man's desire.
/This desert rose
/Each of his veils a secret promise
/This desert flower
/No sweet perfume ever tortured me more than this
/And now he turns
/This was he moves in the logic of all my dreams
*
Quatre held back his tears as he rose to the window. The glittering silver stars seemed to form together the figure of his lover, but it was only an illusion. Perhaps Trowa refused because he truly didn't love him. But...if that was true, then why could Quatre feel such overpowering distress. He knew he loved Trowa, but didn't Trowa love him back? Quatre shook his head and looked down at the moon shining on the golden desert sand. Trowa didn't love him? It couldn't be true....
/This fire burns
/I realize nothing is as it seems
/I dream of rain
/I dream of gardens in the desert sand
*
Trowa could almost fall asleep watching the image of his lover dance in his mind. But opening his eyes became painful for him - returning to the tortured reality without Quatre was more than he could bear, even if he didn't show it.
/I wake in pain
/I dream of love as time runs through my hands
*
The simple thought of Trowa not returning his love was too much for Quatre. He was alone, and let the tears flow freely from his eyes. He rose his head and looked into the sky at the constellation that looked so much like Trowa. The slow drizzle of tears fell onto the pale skin of his hands.
/I dream of rain
/I lift my gaze to empty skies above
*
Trowa looked over to his dresser. There sat the picture frame and the vase he treasured so dearly. He walked over and picked up the green rose from inside the crystal vase. He closed his eyes again and held the flower to his face, taking a deep breath in. He couldn't even smell the scent of the rose anymore - only Quatre.
/I close my eyes
/This rare perfume
/Is the sweet perfume is the sweet intoxication of his love
/My life is for you
/And no one other than you
*
Quatre let out a cry, and he let his head fall into his tear marked hands. Why had he never told Trowa how he truly felt? It was the one mistake that would haunt him for the rest of his life.
/My life is for you
/And no one other than you.
*
Trowa moved the flower from his face and stared at it. The memories flowed back into his mind without warning. Without even closing his eyes, he saw Quatre running out into the rain to the garden to get this special gift. He could clearly see Quatre's shining face when he handed it to him. Trowa placed the rose back into the vase and wiped a not yet fallen tear from his eye. He knew the decision he had to make. There was only one way to make up for the mistake he made. He reached in his pocket and pulled out the keys to his truck. There was no reason to stay here any longer. He swiftly packed his things and threw them into his truck.
/I dream of rain
/I dream of gardens in the desert sand
*
Quatre slowly pulled himself together and washed the tear streaks from his face. He stood back at the window, hoping the sight of the silver stars and pure moon would wash away his sorrow.
/I wake in pain
/I dream of love as time runs through my hands
*
Trowa drove for hours; setting his course to the place he thought Quatre may be. It was only a hunch, but he had never been wrong before. He only hoped it was not too late to redeem himself in his lovers eyes. They had been apart for so long, Trowa could only hope that Quatre would forgive him. He drove until the sun rose and encompassed the earth with its radiance. Silently he pulled the truck up to the side of a house, and managed to sneak in undetected. If Quatre was here, he knew exactly where to go. He walked up a flight of stairs and down a long corridor, a look of happiness slowly spreading across his face. He didn't quite know why he hadn't done this before. The scent of the emerald rose he carried in his pocket filled the air. He was home; he was where he belonged.
/Sweet desert rose
/Each of his veils a secret promise
/This desert flower
/No sweet perfume ever tortured me more than this
/Sweet desert rose
/This memory of Eden haunts us all
/This desert flower, this rare perfume
/Is the sweet intoxication of the fall
Quatre heard the door creak open and jerked up from his not so peaceful sleep. He stood up and looked at the figure in the doorway - it was hard for him to make out, as he squinted against the golden light. The door closed, leaving both Quatre and the figure in the dim light of his bedroom. Quatre's face lit up when he could finally make out the face of the intruder. Could it be true? Trowa, here? Quatre ran to Trowa, and Trowa happily opened his arms as Quatre stood, and waited for Trowa to approach him. He didn't have the strength to walk anymore. They held each other there as tightly as they could, neither showing signs of releasing the other. Suddenly Trowa could feel Quatre burry his head deeper into his chest. Quatre began to cry uncontrollably, and Trowa sat down on the bed, Quatre still clinging to him.
"Trowa..." He sobbed. "Trowa I'm so sorry..."
Trowa stroked the boys beautiful and soft blonde hair. "Shh...it's alright now..."
Quatre climbed on the bed, stumbling. He looked up a Trowa with faint eyes. "Trowa...just hold me.....please..."
Trowa held the boy tighter. He lifted his gaze from his love just long enough to catch the flash of a paper nearby. He could read it from here. It was a medical statement.... 'Patient-Quatre Rabara Winner; Diagnosis-Tumor, Malignant; Location-Brain, left lobe; Condition- ____'
Trowa went into shock. Quatre was dying...! This couldn't be true...no, it was a lie. He clutched onto Quatre. "Why didn't you tell me...?!"
"Trowa, I'm sorry. I-I didn't want to hurt you....that's why I wanted you to come...so I could say goodbye...Oh Trowa I'm so happy you've come!" Quatre grasped the arms of Trowa's shirt and sobbed into his chest once more. Trowa rocked him back and forth gently, the tears falling steadily from his eyes to mingle with Quatre's silk hair. "Trowa, I want you to know that no matter what happens....I'll always be with you......Trowa, I love you..."
Trowa closed his eyes and wrapped Quatre in his dawn scented embrace, letting the tears fall more freely. "Quatre...Quatre I love you...I love you will all my heart and soul...please..." Quatre's grip on him began to weaken significantly. "Please....don't leave me..." With his hand he lifted Quatre's head to face his. Quatre's eyes were sparkling even though they had been drained of tears, his face stained with dark streaks. Trowa looked down at him helplessly.
Using his very last bit of energy, Quatre thrust forward and held onto Trowa with all of his strength. Trowa held him there, as the grip once again slowly loosened, but this time it didn't stop until the body grew limp. Trowa couldn't bear to let go. This would haunt him for the rest of his life...had he gone from the start, this wouldn't have happened. Trowa held his lover tightly, weeping, not wanting to believe he was gone. He wanted to hear the sound of Quatre's voice more than anything now...he had taken it for granted for so long. Now, regret was all that was left.
/My life is for you
/And no one else but you
Disclaimer: Don't own Gundam Wing, don't own Quatre or Trowa (wish I did), don't own the song "Desert Rose" either.
Warning: Shonen Ai, lots of it. Oh, yeah, and plenty of angst, and.... MUUUUSH!!
Dedication: (sap warning) This fic is for my beloved and beautiful Rose Princess - for she does not know how hard it will be for her Prince to leave. (end sap)
Trowa sat up in his bed; He hadn't slept in weeks. The insomnia was killing him. But it wasn't exactly the insomnia itself that caused him the most pain. It was the reason he couldn't sleep. Every time he closed his eyes, there was Quatre...almost as if he were tattooed to his eyelids. Why couldn't he stop thinking about him? He sighed and fell back onto his pillow, hands behind his head. Was he just lonely...or did he really love Quatre?
/It has been a long time
/And I am looking for myself and my loved one
*
Quatre opened his eyes. He had another dream about Trowa. The dreams were becoming more frequent now; almost every night he would have a dream about Trowa. Not that the dreams weren't pleasant - quite the contrary, he loved the dreams. But, wished they were real; he didn't want to only see him in dreams...he wanted to hold him now.
/It has been a long time
/And I am looking for myself and my loved one
*
Trowa stared at the ceiling. The days and nights he spent with Quatre ran through his mind non-stop. The battles, the times he spent at Quatre's beautiful estate, the sorrowful goodbye after the war. He didn't want to say goodbye; it was a decision he made, and now a decision he regretted.
/I dream of rain
/I dream of gardens in the desert sand
*
Quatre hugged his pillow. Why didn't Trowa want to stay with him? When Quatre offered him to stay with him, Trowa declined. Then Quatre held back the tears so Trowa would not see him cry. But now, he wished he had shown Trowa his pain, for now, he could not hold back the tears.
/I wake in pain
/I dream of love as time runs through my hand.
/I dream of fire
/Those dreams are tied to a horse that will never tire
*
Trowa closed his eyes. Quatre's image played in his mind. All he could see was the young Arabian's figure moving across the blackness and confusion of his soul. The look in Quatre's eyes when Trowa last saw him haunted him - he knew the sorrow Quatre felt and how he tried to hide it. He felt almost guilty as he lay there with his eyes closed, gazing into the eyes of a tortured shadow that was not there.
/And in the flames
/His shadows play in the shape of man's desire.
/This desert rose
/Each of his veils a secret promise
/This desert flower
/No sweet perfume ever tortured me more than this
/And now he turns
/This was he moves in the logic of all my dreams
*
Quatre held back his tears as he rose to the window. The glittering silver stars seemed to form together the figure of his lover, but it was only an illusion. Perhaps Trowa refused because he truly didn't love him. But...if that was true, then why could Quatre feel such overpowering distress. He knew he loved Trowa, but didn't Trowa love him back? Quatre shook his head and looked down at the moon shining on the golden desert sand. Trowa didn't love him? It couldn't be true....
/This fire burns
/I realize nothing is as it seems
/I dream of rain
/I dream of gardens in the desert sand
*
Trowa could almost fall asleep watching the image of his lover dance in his mind. But opening his eyes became painful for him - returning to the tortured reality without Quatre was more than he could bear, even if he didn't show it.
/I wake in pain
/I dream of love as time runs through my hands
*
The simple thought of Trowa not returning his love was too much for Quatre. He was alone, and let the tears flow freely from his eyes. He rose his head and looked into the sky at the constellation that looked so much like Trowa. The slow drizzle of tears fell onto the pale skin of his hands.
/I dream of rain
/I lift my gaze to empty skies above
*
Trowa looked over to his dresser. There sat the picture frame and the vase he treasured so dearly. He walked over and picked up the green rose from inside the crystal vase. He closed his eyes again and held the flower to his face, taking a deep breath in. He couldn't even smell the scent of the rose anymore - only Quatre.
/I close my eyes
/This rare perfume
/Is the sweet perfume is the sweet intoxication of his love
/My life is for you
/And no one other than you
*
Quatre let out a cry, and he let his head fall into his tear marked hands. Why had he never told Trowa how he truly felt? It was the one mistake that would haunt him for the rest of his life.
/My life is for you
/And no one other than you.
*
Trowa moved the flower from his face and stared at it. The memories flowed back into his mind without warning. Without even closing his eyes, he saw Quatre running out into the rain to the garden to get this special gift. He could clearly see Quatre's shining face when he handed it to him. Trowa placed the rose back into the vase and wiped a not yet fallen tear from his eye. He knew the decision he had to make. There was only one way to make up for the mistake he made. He reached in his pocket and pulled out the keys to his truck. There was no reason to stay here any longer. He swiftly packed his things and threw them into his truck.
/I dream of rain
/I dream of gardens in the desert sand
*
Quatre slowly pulled himself together and washed the tear streaks from his face. He stood back at the window, hoping the sight of the silver stars and pure moon would wash away his sorrow.
/I wake in pain
/I dream of love as time runs through my hands
*
Trowa drove for hours; setting his course to the place he thought Quatre may be. It was only a hunch, but he had never been wrong before. He only hoped it was not too late to redeem himself in his lovers eyes. They had been apart for so long, Trowa could only hope that Quatre would forgive him. He drove until the sun rose and encompassed the earth with its radiance. Silently he pulled the truck up to the side of a house, and managed to sneak in undetected. If Quatre was here, he knew exactly where to go. He walked up a flight of stairs and down a long corridor, a look of happiness slowly spreading across his face. He didn't quite know why he hadn't done this before. The scent of the emerald rose he carried in his pocket filled the air. He was home; he was where he belonged.
/Sweet desert rose
/Each of his veils a secret promise
/This desert flower
/No sweet perfume ever tortured me more than this
/Sweet desert rose
/This memory of Eden haunts us all
/This desert flower, this rare perfume
/Is the sweet intoxication of the fall
Quatre heard the door creak open and jerked up from his not so peaceful sleep. He stood up and looked at the figure in the doorway - it was hard for him to make out, as he squinted against the golden light. The door closed, leaving both Quatre and the figure in the dim light of his bedroom. Quatre's face lit up when he could finally make out the face of the intruder. Could it be true? Trowa, here? Quatre ran to Trowa, and Trowa happily opened his arms as Quatre stood, and waited for Trowa to approach him. He didn't have the strength to walk anymore. They held each other there as tightly as they could, neither showing signs of releasing the other. Suddenly Trowa could feel Quatre burry his head deeper into his chest. Quatre began to cry uncontrollably, and Trowa sat down on the bed, Quatre still clinging to him.
"Trowa..." He sobbed. "Trowa I'm so sorry..."
Trowa stroked the boys beautiful and soft blonde hair. "Shh...it's alright now..."
Quatre climbed on the bed, stumbling. He looked up a Trowa with faint eyes. "Trowa...just hold me.....please..."
Trowa held the boy tighter. He lifted his gaze from his love just long enough to catch the flash of a paper nearby. He could read it from here. It was a medical statement.... 'Patient-Quatre Rabara Winner; Diagnosis-Tumor, Malignant; Location-Brain, left lobe; Condition- ____'
Trowa went into shock. Quatre was dying...! This couldn't be true...no, it was a lie. He clutched onto Quatre. "Why didn't you tell me...?!"
"Trowa, I'm sorry. I-I didn't want to hurt you....that's why I wanted you to come...so I could say goodbye...Oh Trowa I'm so happy you've come!" Quatre grasped the arms of Trowa's shirt and sobbed into his chest once more. Trowa rocked him back and forth gently, the tears falling steadily from his eyes to mingle with Quatre's silk hair. "Trowa, I want you to know that no matter what happens....I'll always be with you......Trowa, I love you..."
Trowa closed his eyes and wrapped Quatre in his dawn scented embrace, letting the tears fall more freely. "Quatre...Quatre I love you...I love you will all my heart and soul...please..." Quatre's grip on him began to weaken significantly. "Please....don't leave me..." With his hand he lifted Quatre's head to face his. Quatre's eyes were sparkling even though they had been drained of tears, his face stained with dark streaks. Trowa looked down at him helplessly.
Using his very last bit of energy, Quatre thrust forward and held onto Trowa with all of his strength. Trowa held him there, as the grip once again slowly loosened, but this time it didn't stop until the body grew limp. Trowa couldn't bear to let go. This would haunt him for the rest of his life...had he gone from the start, this wouldn't have happened. Trowa held his lover tightly, weeping, not wanting to believe he was gone. He wanted to hear the sound of Quatre's voice more than anything now...he had taken it for granted for so long. Now, regret was all that was left.
/My life is for you
/And no one else but you