Hello my beautiful people, before you start reading I just want to say a few things. My last Merlin (merthur) fanfic was a huge success and I am so grateful to all of you who have read it and supported me! Seeing as I haven't done anything for ages, I decided to get my author on and just sit and write. The first thing that came into my head was this prompt I've been loving for ages that says:

Everyone has a soul mate, when your soul mate dies, everything turns black and white. You however were born into a world of black and white until one day you wake up and the world is in colour.

Now, I decided to be a bit naughty and change it slightly to fit what I had in mind.

This is just an experiment! I don't know whether it is good or not I just sat down and wrote what I've been wanting to for ages. So, here is my question to you:

Do you like it? Should I continue this? Would you like to see more? Leave a comment!

Disclaimer: All respective characters rightfully belong to Merlin BBC

Getting out of bed every day to grey covers and grey walls gets tiring after a while. Although after 1000 years you get used to it. How I envy the people I pass in the street, marvelling at the wondrous colours that filled a photo frame, or arguing whether a piece of clothing was lilac or mauve. I missed it; not being able to see the bright blue of the sky, or the deep green of someone's eyes. Everything was just grey.

It wasn't always like this. I used to be able to marvel at the colours in a photo frame like other people. I used to be able to see the gorgeous blue of someone's eyes as they looked at me, be able to look into someone's eyes and be able to see their souls.

You see, this world revolves around soul mates. The only person that was meant to be the other side of your coin. Many people made it their lives ambition to find them.

There was one catch, however; one thing that Fate decided would be a good thing. It wasn't. I have seen people waste away because of this catch, not being able to be near their soul mate, because they were in the next world. I have watched as they despair at their sudden inability to see colour. For when your soul mate dies, your whole world turns black and white.

Those people who lost their colour, as the phrase goes, usually last about a year, trying to survive in the world after half of their soul had been ripped from them.

Mine was ripped from me, in the worst possible way. It was many lifetimes ago, and yet I can still vividly see it in my mind whenever I close my eyes. Their once bright eyes slowly losing their light, until all I could see were grey orbs of a dead man. The flames that rose from their boat almost seemed unreal, those white flicks in the middle of a dull grey lake.

That was 1000 years ago, and yet here I am.

Thoughts like this cloud my mind every day, every second they are running through my head like a never ending river. I have tried to shake them off before, but they come back tenfold, blinding me of visions of bright capes, light hair waving in the wind and flashes of their last moments.

I couldn't stay where I was, not after he left me. I ran. And ran. Until my feet bled and I couldn't breathe. Even then I still kept on, lost in my own mind's torture where I could not escape.

Many moments after that are lost to me, as they happened so long ago and I was so broken with grief.

I got used to the black and white world around me and, after years of searching, I finally found somewhere that calmed me. It wasn't home. The feeling of home was viciously ripped from me by the hands of Fate. I fought in wars, helped other people overcome plague, saved people from torture, but could never save myself.

After all this time I am still not saved. I don't think I will ever be. Fate is cruel, and does not like to be challenged. I tried, many times, to bring my soul mate back to me, but every time Fate denied me.

I found a place to settle down, after years of endless wondering; the place where he was ripped from me. It was somehow the same, even though the landscape around it had changed dramatically. Maybe the spirits felt pity for me and kept the lake untouched. I bought a tiny cottage that over looked the place, with no neighbours, just wildlife around me. I liked it. I felt closer to the Earth that way.

I got a job, as a barista in a small coffee shop in the next village to me. I haven't gotten close to anyone in the time I've been there, I wouldn't dare. I've had far too much heartbreak to get close to anyone ever again.

Looking at the clock on my shabby bedside table, I realised that my overpowering thoughts made me late. I rushed around my dark bedroom, falling over my own feet as I try and stick my leg through my trouser hole. I donned my dark work tee and grabbed a hoodie. Clothing in this modern age was one of the only things I appreciated, it was much comfier than anything before the 1960s. Walking into the still kitchen, I grabbed my keys from the bowl by the door and lock up. Glancing back as I walk towards the road, I thought just how small my house was. I didn't mind it, I was the only one who lived there, and it was fine for me. I shrugged on my hoodie and shoved my keys in the pocket, beginning my short walk to the coffee shop. As I trudged down the street, I overheard two middle aged mothers chatting.

"It's so grey and overcast today, nothing like yesterday"

I found this amusing. Lucky for some, I thought. Looking up, the sky was just as grey as the day before, but with more clouds. I shook my head and carried on my way, trying to ignore everyone else.

The bell on the door chimed loudly as I stepped through the door, pulling my hood down and shaking my hair out. It was getting long, almost touching my shoulders. I was told by my co-workers that I suited it, though, so I decided to keep it.

I made a bee-line towards the back of the shop, hanging my hoodie up on a hook and grabbing an apron.

Kate was already behind the counter, and gave me a smile as I walked back through to the front of the shop. She was nice, and had helped me a lot when I started working there. I got on well with her, but would always turn down her invitations to go for a drink afterwards, I didn't want to get too close to her. She looked a couple of years older than my physical form, but I didn't know her actual age, I never bothered to ask. She had dark hair, I guessed it was brown, but wasn't certain, which was always pulled up in a messy ponytail with pieces falling around her head. Somehow, she always looked beautiful, even after a 10 hour shift. She was shorter than me, although typically taller than most women and a healthy weight. Most girls envied her for the confident way she held herself, always with her head high. She stopped sweeping the floor and turned to me, just as I realised I had drifted off.

"Head in the clouds again, eh, Merlin?" She said with a cheeky smile and nudged me with her elbow so she could sweep where I was standing.

I gave her a smile and went to the till, "Sorry" I replied, which made her chuckle.

"After a few years I'm used to it, sweetie, you're always doing it. You know you can tell me whatever you keep thinking about?"

I glanced sideways at her and shook my head, "It's a very long story"

"Well I've known you for two years and hardly know a thing about you except your eyes are exceptionally gorgeous"

I chuckled, Kate always had a way of cheering me up, even if it was only for a few minutes.

"Does Rupert know you always flirt with me?" I raised an eyebrow at her as the bell signalled a customer. I gave them a wide smile as they entered and took a seat, trying to decide on the type of coffee they wanted.

Kate scoffed, "He doesn't care if I flirt with you, sweetie, he only gets jealous if the flirtee is a threat"

I pretended to be offended, "What do you mean? That I'm not a threat?"

She laughed, her curls bouncing around her face, "Of course you're not. I've never even see you look at someone with interest"

My smile faded and I turned back to the till. Kate knew she hit a sore spot but was stopped from saying anything when the customers advanced to the till.

I greeted them happily and got their orders, firing up the coffee machine as they took their seats again.

"Look, Merlin, I'm sorry" I heard Kate's guilty voice behind me.

I shook my head and gave her a look over my shoulder as I made the coffee, my hands moving on their own accord, it was almost muscle memory now. "It's fine, seriously."

"No it's not"

"Yes it is."

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Kate sidle up to my side, trying to show me just how sorry she was.

"It's really not. Did something happen? I didn't know"

Flashes of his smiling eyes clouded my vision for a second. "It was a long time ago" I muttered, placing the two freshly made coffees on a tray. "It doesn't matter anymore, can we change the subject please?" I said quickly before walking over to the customers' table to give them their orders. When I returned to the counter, Kate had gone back to sweeping, a guilty look still on her face. I decided to change the subject.

"How was your weekend? You said you were going to the beach with your family?"

Kate sighed dramatically, and I chuckled at just how much of a drama queen she could be sometimes, especially when it came to her family.

"Don't get me started on my bloody weekend" She growled, her sweeping becoming almost violent, "It was shit. No wonder my family never gets together"

I listened as she ranted, happy to take my mind of things for a bit, even if it was how Kate's brother got attacked by a seagull.

An hour into my shift and there had only been five customers. I had taken out my sketchpad from under the counter and was sketching when Kate came back in from her break, smelling of the last cigarette she's smoked.

"You stink" I said offhandedly, not taking my eyes from my book. I felt a hand slap my arm. "Hey!" I exclaimed, rubbing my arm and turned to the feisty woman, who was scowling.

"You bloody hypocrite"

"I always chew gum afterwards"

"I smoke menthol. So I smell less than you"

"Still stinks" I mumbled.

Kate grumbled something that sounded a lot like 'arsehole' and went to make us both some coffee. I turned back to my sketchbook.

After a minute or so, Kate became suspiciously silent. I looked around to see what she was doing, only to find her peering over my shoulder.

"What are you doing?" I asked.

"Watching you draw. You're very talented"

"I've had a lot of time to practice"

Before I could react, Kate pulled the sketchbook from under my arm and began to flip through it.

"Oi!" I tried to grab it back, but she kept moving it out of my reach.

I eventually gave up, resigning myself to lean on the counter as Kate happily flipped through the book. Her smile faded after she turned a page, bringing it closer to her face so she could observe the drawing more. I knew immediately what page it was.

"Who's this?" She asked, turning the book around to show me the sketches, not that I needed to see them to know who it was. He had haunted my dreams, my every thought, since he left. I cleared the lump that came to my throat with a cough and looked down at the counter.

"Arthur" The name felt foreign to me as I spoke; I hadn't said his name aloud in years.

"He's gorgeous"

"He was my…boss" I quickly lied, almost telling her the truth. I wanted to stay acquainted with Kate, she was my only connection to people and I didn't want her thinking of me as a freak.

"Was he nice?"

I huffed a laugh, "No", smiling at her shocked expression, "He was a terrible boss. And a huge prat"

"Then why didn't you leave your job?"

I shifted to look at her, a sad smile on my face, "He was my best friend…he was my…" I couldn't finish the sentence, but Kate knew nevertheless.

"He was your soul mate"

I nodded, going back to staring at the counter.

"Did you love him?" A soft voice asked me. Soul mates didn't have to be in love, but could be friends or even enemies. In my case, however, I couldn't lie.

"Yes" I breathed, because I did, I loved him, no matter how much of an ass he was, I couldn never hate him. "But nothing came of it" I thought aloud, "He married someone else. I don't think he even knew we were soul mates, he never felt it"

I felt a hand wrap around my shoulders and pat my arm, looking sideways I saw Kate giving me a sympathetic look.

"I'm sorry"

"It's okay"

"No, it's not" Kate smiled at the reference to our earlier conversation.

I smiled too, only slightly. Maybe I could consider Kate as a friend, just for the time being give into having a companion. After all, I thought, why am I holding myself back? He's never coming back, I need to start enjoying my eternal life.

"I want to go out tonight. Meet your friends"

Kate's surprised expression almost made me crack up laughing.

"R-Really?"

"Yeah. I'm done with being sad"

Her shock turned into a wide smile.

"Okay!" She said excitedly, bouncing on her feet. I rolled my eyes but laughed nonetheless. "I'll give them a call and tell them to meet us at The Old Tavern at half 7, that good for you?"

"Sure" I got off work in an hour, so had time for some down time before actually socialising. I was excited, I hadn't done things like this in years. Not since I realised trying to get close to people was useless. All I did was watch them grow old and fulfil their life before the inevitable happened. But, maybe, this time, I didn't have to get so close to them, only keep Kate and her friends on the border of acquaintances/friends. This could work.

Realizing Merlin had drifted off into thought again, Kate rushed into the back room to get her phone and dialled her friend's number. It rang twice before someone answered.

"The Old Tavern. Tonight. 7:30. Meet up"

"Cool, I'll tell the others."

"What about A-"

"He won't come"

"Yes he will."

"I seriously doubt it, Kate, you know what he's like"

"You know that guy Merlin I work with? The one I want to introduce you guys to?"

"Yeah…?"

"He's his soul mate"