I lay my head on the Deli door hoping to God he would come out so I could keep him safe. The condensation gathered on the glass window in front of me as I listened intensely for any signs of movement or presence. I nearly gave up, I nearly walked away from him something had me rooted there on the spot, I couldn't physically move and my mind was shouting at me not to leave him there all alone. A burst of noise hit my ear, and a curse followed it in a hushed voice.
"Steven please, I know you're in there!" I pleaded as the cold wind wrapped itself around me, "I can't leave without you I need you safe…please understand Walker is dangerous!" I whined softly tapping my fist against the pane hoping not to scare him more than I already had.
"Go away…" mumbled Steven, "-just go Brendan." No I thought to myself, never, I need him and Cheryl safe.
"I'm not moving Steven; just let me in its pretty cold outside… please." I replied once again resting my head against the door. Some shuffling followed and the door creaked open softly as I heard the retreating figure pass softly towards the back of the shop once more. It was dark and eerie inside and I moved cautiously towards the kitchen. A soft lamp illuminated a corner of the room as I finally lay eyes on him since he ran off.
What had I done? Maybe it was selfish of me but I needed him more than ever, I needed him to drive out the monster that was inside of me, eating away on the little good that was left. I crouched down so I was sat on the floor opposite him, the floor was like ice but it didn't matter. He had his head bowed and as the minutes flew by the only noise that filled the shop were the little sniffles he emitted.
"Steven-" He flinched lightly. "I am so sorry, it's Walker he's done this to me, he's triggered stuff, we before all this with Kevin, it was great, yer remember? And it can be again, I just need you away from here just until I know he's gone." I begged nearly whispering at the end.
"Walker wasn't around the first time you beat me, so don't you use that as an excuse, I'm the one putting up with this I don't want to be SCARED of you!" he shouted in anger then retreated back to looking down.
My heart broke, even more than it had.
"Alright, Walker was part of it, yer remember me dad? And how I told you he beat me, every-single-day?" I asked, now or never Brendan come on.
"Brenda …Brenda … Brenda." Echoed around in my head. NO!
I saw him nod, his eyes were trained on me.
"He er, took stuff from me, ur- my- he took it from me Steven- the good- th-e innocence…" please God understand me, I can't say it, not to you….
I heard a light gasp and heard the click in his brain, don't make me explain…
I bowed my head and heard shuffling a few moments later. He was sat to my right now leaning against my shoulder, he tenderly picked up my hand that lay in my lap, and I wanted to cry. He rested him head on my shoulder and drew circles on my hand in a comforting manner.
"I can't say I fully understand it Bren, I still can't trust you…yet, and what he did, no one should go through that." He trailed off in determination.
"Just let me get you away, please you and Cheryl are my life at the moment, the good, please we can sort it out after, I can't let him hurt you."
"Ok… let's go."
And that's all I needed to hear.