The Other Night
Angela woke up momentarily forgetting where she was. Then the events of the night before swirled around in her head. She looked to her right and saw him lying there. His head was turned away from her his chest falling and rising with each breath. She turned away and pressed her hand to her mouth. My God what had she done? How could she have when she was in love with Tony? She climbed out of his bed and went to the bathroom. Splashing cold water on her face she willed herself to stop shaking. But nothing she could say or do would stop it. She sat down at the edge of his tub and put her head between her knees. She felt like she was going to be sick. She took a couple of deep breaths and eventually her nausea subsided. But the guilt was still there. Shaking her head she once again was bombarded with memories from last night.
The house had been chaotic with Tony and his study group and she with John and Peter. Eventually she had offered to leave and go to Peter's house. She didn't feel any qualms about it. After all she had known Peter since her Wallace &McQuade days. In fact he had been one of her first clients when she had started her own agency. They were old friends and she knew she had nothing to worry about being alone with him-or so she thought.
While at his house they each had a couple glasses of wine. They talked about old times. They laughed about old times. And then...then they kissed. It should have stopped there but it didn't. They didn't. She didn't. He led her to his bedroom. She didn't know what came over her. The one part of her told her to stop. She couldn't do this. She was in love with Tony. The other part told her it was okay. She was a grown woman who could do what she wanted and she liked and trusted Peter. She had no reason to feel guilty. But she did. She had made love with one man while in love with another.
She heard stirring coming from the bedroom and walked over and opened the door.
"Good Morning." he said smiling.
"Morning." she returned softly.
"Sleep well?" he asked climbing out of bed.
"Yes, I did. But ummmm I have- I need to get going."
"Okay." he smiled and walked over to her. He pulled her to him and kissed her gently.
"Last night was amazing."
*No it wasn't! I made love with you when I'm in love with Tony!.* she screamed silently.
Instead she smiled and said yes it was. He gave her once last kiss and went to the bathroom. She hurriedly got dressed and went outside to her car hoping to get home before anyone noticed she hadn't been home all night.
She slowly opened her front door hoping that no one else was up yet so she could sneak upstairs. She breathed a sigh of relief when she didn't see anyone in the living room. But then she heard his voice.
"Okay everyone, breakfast will be ready in five minutes!"
She froze in terror. She knew he was in the kitchen and could sneak upstairs without him knowing but her legs felt like they had cement blocks on them. Eventually her legs cooperated with the rest of her and she walked up the stairs and went into her room. She stripped off her clothes and went to take a shower. The water ran down her face mixing with her tears. Once again she wondered how she could have slept with Peter when she loved Tony. Peter was a good looking man and she had in the past been attracted to him. But they had always had more of a friendship/business relationship than anything romantic. That was why she was so confused. She turned off the shower and dried herself off and slipped into a pair of her butter cream yellow pajamas. She called the office and told them she wouldn't be in that day. Luckily she didn't have any major meetings and she trusted her staff to take care of her business. Usually her work comforted her but today she just wanted to be alone.
"Dad are you okay?" Sam asked in concern. He had been unusually silent during breakfast. Usually he'd be joking with Jonathon and her but today he had barely spoken a word to either of them except the usual "Good morning kids!"
"Ummm yeah. I'm fine. Just worried about my art exam." But that wasn't the whole truth. He was worried about Angela. He had stayed up until midnight waiting for her to come home. Eventually exhaustion had taken over and he had gone on to bed. He turned away from the sink to face Sam and Jonathon.
"Has anyone seen Angela yet this morning?" he asked hoping he sounded casual.
"Yeah, I heard her shower running about twenty minutes ago." Jonathon replied.
Tony inwardly breathed a sigh of relief. Okay so she had made it home safely. He had been worried about her being out. He knew she was an adult perfectly capable of taking care of herself and he knew that Peter was an old friend and that she trusted him-but still he worried. She was his best friend and sometimes he felt like she was something more. But than something would happen. His insecurities. The fact that she made more money than him. There was always something holding him back. At times he told himself to forgot all that stuff and take a chance. But he always chickened out. She was out of his league. She was like a star in the night sky. He should be with someone like Kathleen from his study group. She was near his age and was working her way through college as a waitress. The two them together made more sense than Angela and him. But than why did his thoughts always lead him to Angela?
He said goodbye to the kids and went upstairs to check on Angela. He knew he was being overbearing, overprotective, and over the top but he couldn't help himself. He knocked on her door calling her name. At her response he opened her door and was startled to find her in her pajamas sitting on her bed her back resting against her pillows.
"Angela? What's wrong?"
"Nothing."
"Aren't you going to work?"
"Not today." she said barely above a whisper.
He walked over to her and placed a hand to her forehead. It felt cool but he felt warm. Just the slight touch of her skin was enough to get his heart racing. He had an overwhelming feeling to lean down and kiss her but before he knew what had happened she pulled away from him.
"No fever."
"Tony, I'm not sick. I just decided to take the day off."
"Okay. You deserve a day off every now and then." he smiled. He expected a witty comeback but all she did was nod her head. What was going on here? She didn't seem like herself. She had barely looked at him while he had been in her bedroom. She seemed distant somehow.
"Angela? What's wrong? You don't seem like yourself. "
"I'm fine Tony." Inside she screamed at herself: *No you're not!* "I just need ummm want to be alone today."
"Okay, if that's what you want. But you know if somethings the matter I'm here right?"
"Of course I do."
"So I'll hold all your calls." he smiled.
"Thank you Tony."
"No problem." he said softly wishing she would tell him what was going on. He knew something was but that she would tell him in her own time. He let himself out of her room and closed the door.
The day passed slowly. Each second felt like an hour. Each minute felt like a day. She didn't come out of her room the entire day. He bought a tray up to her for lunch but she refused it. He was worried about her. He paced the living room pondering what could be wrong with her. Each thought became worse than the one before. Did she lose an account? Was her business in trouble? Was she sick? More ill than the common cold? The thought caused a chill to go down his spine. He couldn't fathom the thought of losing her. What would he do without her?
"Penny for your thoughts Bub."
"Oh hey Mona."
"Hey yourself. What's going on?"
"I'm worried about Angela."
"Why?"
"She doesn't seem like herself. She took the day off work and you know she hardly ever does that. She barely looked at me when I checked on her this morning. I took a tray up to her at lunch but she said she wasn't hungry. I wonder if I said or did something to upset her."
"You want me to go talk to her?"
"She said she wanted to be alone."
"I'm her Mother. When do I ever listen to her?" she scoffed. With those parting words she ascended the stairs.
"Angela? Open up!"
"Not now Mother."
"Yes, now" she said opening the door and closing it behind her.
Angela sighed. "Thanks for respecting my wishes."
"Angela what's going on? Tony is worried about you."
"I'm fine."
"He said you took the day off work and that you barely looked at him while he was in here. He also said you didn't have anything for lunch."
"So?"
"So? So he thinks he said or did something to upset you."
"He didn't. I..." she trailed off. She could feel her eyes filling with tears.
"You what?"
"I did Mother. I did." Unable to stop them the tears fell from her eyes.
Mona was taken aback by her daughter's tears. She sat down next to her and asked her what she meant.
"I did something awful last night."
"What? Eat a whole carton of ice cream?" she joked.
Angela shook her head "This is serious."
"Okay." Mona said. "So what did you do?"
"I betrayed the man I love. I betrayed Tony."
"How?"
I ummm I slept with Peter last night."
Mona was stunned. Of all the things she expected to hear this was at the bottom of the list.
"You mean you and Peter had..."
"Yes, we did."
"How did it happen? I mean I know how it happened. But what happened?"
"We were at his place having some wine and talking and laughing about old times and before I knew it he was kissing me. "
"And?" Mona prompted her.
"And he led me to his bedroom. I knew I should have stopped him. A part of me said to but another part of me said that I was an adult and could do what I wanted."
"Do you have any regrets?"
"Yes. No. I don't know."
"It's okay if you don't."
"Really? How can you say that?"
"Cause I know you. You don't just casually sleep with someone. I think what happened last night proved that you aren't ready to be with Tony. You may think you are but as of now you're not."
"But, I love him."
"I know you do." she said gently brushing her hair out of her eyes. "But, as I said what happened proves that you aren't ready to take your relationship to the next step."
"I need to tell Tony."
Mona shook her head. "No you don't. Look what's done is done. Telling him won't do either of you any good."
"But, I can't keep this from him- not forever."
"Angela- just a few minutes ago you said that you were an adult and could do what you wanted. Accept it Angela-you wanted last night to happen. You could have walked out before things went as far as they did. But, you stayed. I'm not saying all this to make you feel bad. I just want you to be honest with yourself."
"I'm surprised you're not angry with me."
"I'm not angry. I'm sad. I'm sad that you're so upset. I hate that you're in so much pain. But, I'm not angry."
"What should I do now?"
"Nothing. Just let things be."
The doorbell rang forcing Tony from his thoughts. He opened the door and found Peter standing there.
"Hey Tony. Is Angela here?"
"Yeah, she is. But, if you want to talk to her you'll have to wait until tomorrow."
"Why? Is something wrong?" he asked in concern.
"She..." he shook his head. "Ummm why don't you come on in?"
Peter walked in and went over to the couch. Tony sat down beside him.
"Did Angela seem upset last night? I mean she stayed home today from work and she didn't eat any breakfast or lunch. I'm worried about her. You've known her for a long time-even longer than me. I mean I am her best friend but she, I don't know she seems different somehow."
"She was fine last night. Wonderful actually." he smiled.
Tony caught his smile and felt a sprinkling of unease. He pushed away the thought that was forming in his head.
"Peter! What are you doing here?"
They both stood when they heard her voice. Tony looked at her and then at Peter who was watching her with open admiration. No, it was more than that. It was the look that a man gets after he and a woman..." he refused to even entertain the notion of that thought.
"Well I thought I'd come by to see if you wanted to go out to dinner?"
"Well, I really don't look my best." she said indicating the jeans and sweater she had hastily put on when she heard Peter's voice from upstairs.
"Oh come on Angela. You know you always look beautiful." Tony said softly.
"No, I don't." she protested.
"Yes, you do." Peter said soberly.
There was something in Peter's voice that made Tony's heart speed up and his stomach clench. He looked at the two of them and caught the secret look that passed between them. Something was going on with them. But, it couldn't be what he was thinking. It just couldn't. He knew the only way to put his mind at ease was to talk to Angela. He would find out he was wrong and have a good laugh at himself.
"Hey Angela? Could I speak to you in the kitchen for a moment?"
"Sure. Peter? I have some papers in my study that you need to look over."
"Okay. I'll go do that." he smiled at her and walked over to her study.
Angela entered the kitchen to find Tony standing by the sink. He turned to look at her trying desperately to read the truth in her eyes.
"Ah Angela. I ummm I know this is going to sound ridiculous."
"Tony I need to tell you something."
They both spoke at the same time. Smiling nervously he motioned for her to go on.
"Tony, last night something happened between Peter and me."
"Something? You mean..."
"Yes." she sighed heavily. She wanted to walk over to him but she felt rooted to her spot. He had turned away from her. She wished she could read his mind. She had never seen him so quiet. Finally, he turned back around.
"So you and Peter? Does this mean the two of you are an item now?"
"I don't know. I don't know what it means."
"Maybe it means we need to take a step back."
"You think so?"
"Yeah, Angela I know you. You don't just casually sleep with a man. I don't want you to feel guilty about what happened."
She nodded her eyes filled with tears. He tore a piece of paper towel off and handed it to her.
"Maybe this is fate's way of telling us we need more time."
"Maybe."
The doorbell rang then startling both of them.
"Oh, I forgot Dave is coming over to pick me up. We're all meeting at the library to study some more."
"Okay."
"So I guess I'll see you later."
"Okay. Goodbye Tony."
"Goodbye Angela." With one last longing look at each other he exited the kitchen.
Tony stood in the living room and stared at the study door. A part of him wanted to go in there and beat the hell out of Peter. But what would that accomplish? He and Angela weren't officially together. She and Peter were adults and could do what they wanted, Logically he knew that. Emotionally was another story.
Sighing heavily he went to answer the door.
"Hi Tony!"
"Kathleen? I thought Dave was picking me up."
"He was busy so I said I would."
"Oh, okay."
"Say Tony? I was wondering if after we're done studying if you would like to go out and get a cup of coffee?"
He hesitated. In the past he would have said yes right away. But things were different now. But, were they really? No, they weren't he realized sadly.
"Yeah, that would be great." he smiled. "So shall we go?"
Angela paced around the kitchen recalling what Tony had said. She couldn't leave things as they were. She had to stop him before he left.
She pushed open the door.
"Tony!"
She saw him leaving with Kathleen his hand on her shoulder.