MP0;Title: Fly
Author: Lacey
Rating: T
Words:
Pairing: RudeReno
Summary: Rude doesn't know what to think with the sight before him.
Warnings: Cursing, yaoi
AN: We have our first fly in the house today (4/1/10), and I felt the need to write out my frustration over it, using Reno.
Reno had always hated flies. Even when he didn't stink, they buzzed around his head and drove him up the walls. It was like having a hangover without the pleasure of a drink to burn his throat beforehand. They were annoying, peace-ruining, germ-spreading savages and he would do anything and everything to kill them. His favorite thing to do was set his EMR on a high setting and let it sizzle, crackle and spark, drawing them in for a swift and merciless death. However, today, he was on his day off, and Rude had prohibited him to have the use of his weapon.
It was their first fly of the year; a horsefly, by the monstrous size of the thing, and the abnormal size of its general buzzing annoyance. And those things could bite; Reno knew that much about the monsters. So, while Rude had gone out for groceries, Reno had stayed home and tried to get rid of the damned fly before it laid eggs or whatever flies did, and had babies and their house became infested.
When Rude came home, however, the sight before him nearly made him drop the milk. There was Reno, standing half on a dining chair and half on the table, fly swatter in hand, glaring and talking in a growl as something buzzed around his head. Need I mention he was only wearing his helicopter boxers and a tiny white tank-top? It was a sight Rude had never thought he'd see.
"Ren...what are you doing?"
"Killing the moment-ruining menace." Reno responded, leaping from the table and smacking the air.
"AHA!" He cried when he landed on his feet, crouching down to investigate what had dropped. His hand flew to his ear. "Shit, little fucker's smart. I knocked my earring out, not him." He growled as he glared up at the ceiling. "I will get you, Buzzface. Don't you even think I won't."
"Ren, why is it so important to you?"
"Because it will fly into our room when you're plowing me into the mattress, and start buzzing around and distracting me. Then, I will get a headache, and then I will shoot something."
"Ren...chill." Rude picked up the flyswatter from the floor and located the target; a swift smack was heard and the fly fell dead where he had landed. "It isn't hard to kill a fly." Reno growled in response.
"Little fucker kept me runnin' 'round the damn house all the damned day tryin' to nail him."
"Reno, it isn't polite to nail strangers when I'm not home." Rude slipped up behind his lover and hugged him, kissing at his neck.
"You know plenty fuckin' well what I mean, yo." A pause, then a purr, "Now, we should celebrate."
"And how do you recommend we do that?" Rude grinned as he nibbled Reno's ear.
"Sexy fuckin' party."
AN: Yes, a party for the death of a fly. :3 It is so totally worth it. :3