In My Veins

Chapter One

I wished I could say I had some kind of déjà-vu when the door opened and Jesse entered the house with a girl on his lips. But the truth was that I couldn't. It had been two years since he left for college without a word or a message that could explain his sudden disappearance. I had never seen him leave. Since then I had always intented to be anywhere but this house when he returned for a visit. He closed the door behind and threw his jacket aside without seperating from the girl.

The boy next to me said something but I was too occupied watching the scene in the hallway. I knew the girl. She was a friend. Isaac touched my shoulder and I gave him a small smile. He was my best friend. But unfortunately he was Jesse's little brother too.

I remember when my dads and me moved to this neighborhood. I was not older than five but I immediately befriended the neighbors next door. I started to share every class with Isaac and it had never changed. We were seniors now and graduation was just around the corner. Only a few months left until I was hopefully moving to New York attending college and auditioning for my first Broadway show.

Jesse was a whole other story. At the beginning it didn't seem like he was very fond on mebut he was literally pressured into spending time with me since he had to keep an eye on his brother. It wasn't until Isaac and me were staring in our first school play when things changed. We were becoming something like a trio that always did everything together. Jesse was two years older but his relationship with Isaac was close. They shared the same interests and Jesse was Isaacs role model. They were inseperable. And I started to enjoy spending time with both of them.

I never fully understood what had changed until I started High School. At the time I auditioned for show choir Jesse had already leaded them to two National titles. I was still a Freshman but the coach was so impressed of my voice that she gave me a chance as female lead. We won Sectionals together and the thing was decided.

Jesse dragged the girl in the living room when he noticed us on the coach. He stopped. He stopped and stared. Isaac was raising an amused brow at him but he only stared. At me.

I hadn't seem him in two years but I would be lying if I said nothing shifted in me. He looked gorgeous. I noticed the abs under his white shirt and stared for a moment until I got back to my senses. His curls had grown and a strand was falling into his beautiful face. His blue eyes were boring into mine and I struggled to look away.

I wished I could say that Jesse and Isaac didn't resemble each other. But that would be another lie. Most of the times when I looked into Isaac's eyes something in me always got reminded of the older brother. Same with the hair. But while Isaac was nearly six feet two Jesse only reached five feet eleven. It was almost ironic considering their age difference.

Jesse clenched his jaw and I remembered something important. They didn't resemble each other. They looked like brothers but while Isaac was my best friend, Jesse had turned into a stranger.

The girl next to him furrowed her brows and coughed.

"I think you should leave," Jesse said coldly.

I had to smile. The way he was looking at me in this moment was something I couldn't explain. Something strong and powerful that was giving me the confirmation that he would always have a problem with me being around. I had successfully avoided this situation before but his visit was unheralded.

The girl put her hands in her hips and raised an unamused brow at him. "Excuse me?"

He didn't react. He continued to stare at me until I laughed. Isaac furrowed his brows at my reaction and looked back and forth between his brother and me.

I rose to my feet and nodded at him.

"He wasn't talking to you Santana."

For a brief moment there was something like surprise in Jesse's eyes and I allowed myself to enjoy the little victory. I didn't want to be around him either but he had no right to throw me out. Isaac was my best friend and I had the right to spend my time at his house. Now I at least knew that I had spoiled every plans that he had made for Santana and him when I grabbed my bag. It was payback. I gave Isaac a small kiss on his cheek and winked at Santana before I closed the door behind.

My chest tightened. I was leaning at the wall and taking a deep breath. I felt the heat in my eyes and I knew that tears started to form behind my eyelids.

"Could you explain me why this was necessary?"

I smiled small. I should have known that Isaac was going to back me up in all of his glorious height. I wiped the liquid away before it was able to leave my eyes. I was not going to cry.

I imagined how Isaac was standing in front of his brother looking down on him and suppressed a giggle. I knew that it bothered Jesse that Isaac had grown so tall. He had never liked it to look up to someone.

I didn't understand the rest of their conversation. I considered it possible that Jesse didn't even make an effort to explain his decision. A door slammed shut.

Santana was saying something in a seductive low voice that made me leave the terrace. I was walking to my car in a hurry and started the engine when Santana followed a moment later. The look on her face was both confused and full of anger. I sighed. I pressed a button in my car and the window opened. She threw her hands in the air. "What was that?"

I looked at the latina and shrugged. She raised a brow.

"Do you need a ride?" I asked.

She exhaled and walked around the car. A moment later she was sitting on the passenger seat next to me. I waited until she fastened her seat belt and I was finally able to drive away from my obviously unresolved feelings for him.

April 18, 2015.