revision 6/12/14: This is my first rewritten chapter, I'll be uploading the rest through out the next couple weeks! Thank you for sticking with this story! :)
I can't stay here any longer! I just need to get away. There's nowhere I can go though. Becoming Factionless is not an option. I'd never be able to accept that lifestyle. I want to leave the Dauntless behind. I can't just turn back and go in there after what happened. Why did I do something so foolish! Ugh! I ruined everything. I hit Four!
I hear a train coming. Its lights are barely visible, yet I know it's there. Where will I go anyway? Home? Erudite to see Caleb? No, that would just make it worse. I can imagine the trouble I'm already in. Running away from my problems will just add more problems. The train's horn blares as it gets close. The lights cause a glare on my vision. Before I can think to get on the train and see where it takes me, I feel a cool breeze and the train passes me in a matter of seconds. I take in a deep breath. I missed the train. The Dauntless compound is the only place I can go now.
Slowly, I walk back to the pit, taking my time. Where do I go now? Training is over for the day by now. I walk down the dark hallway. It feels nice to walk for a change. The Dauntless run to feel free. The freedom is thrilling, but walking is calm and simple. Each quality completes who I am. When I reach the dorm room, I pace outside. Right now, I don't want anyone, even my friends, to keep me company. My back slides against the wall, down so that I'm sitting on the cold floor. I burry my head into my knees. My mind races through thoughts about Four and my rankings. If nothing happened to Peter, after stabbing Edward, then I doubt they will say anything to me. There's always that possibility though…
The creak of the door opening disturbs me from my thoughts. Footsteps descend out of the room. "Tris?" Christina stops in front of me. I find her eyes as I sit up. "What happened? Where'd you go?" Christina asks fast before I can process anything she says.
"What? Ugh. I don't know? Nowhere." I answer, the frustration evident in my voice. She extends a hand to me. "Come on. Let's go sit down inside." I accept her hand and stand up. Will, who I just noticed is with her, begins to walk off slowly. "I'll meet up with you two later." Christina gives him a smile before walking in with me. We both sit down on my bed.
After explaining how Four ended my fear landscape and scolded me, I wait for what Christina has to say. "Wow…" She pauses. "Aren't you so mad?" I think about that. Yes, I am mad. But, more than mad, I am hurt. What was the point of everything last night? Of course he's just my instructor. I shouldn't have thought of him anything more than that. I remain silent though. "You should have seen him when you ran out! He was furious! Right after you left he went storming out the opposite direction." I should be happy that I got the reaction out of him that he deserves, but I don't. I feel embarrassed. It makes me feel even worse. He's going to tell everyone how immature and cowardly I am. That's just what I need. "Do you think…I'll get my rankings lowered?" She does not respond for a second. "They couldn't!"
Christina and I just sit in an awkward silence for a few moment before the door flies open. Peter strolls in casually with a huge smirk on his face. I want to leave, but there's nowhere else to get away to. I pretend to ignore him and smile lightly at Christina. He walks right towards us anyway. "Ew. Go away!" Christina orders him. If it wasn't Peter standing in front of us, her honesty would have made me laugh. "Why should I?" he remarks with a smirk. "What do you want anyway?" she snaps back at him. "To talk to the Stiff." I should have known that his only intention in coming over here was to berate me. Christina rolls her eyes but gets up. "Will you be okay? I need to go find Will?" She whispers. Instead of speaking I nod in reply. I stand up as she walks out. Peter looks down at me. "I can't believe you slapped Four like that! You're going to be in so much trouble. I bet you'll even be kicked out of Dauntless!" he smirks.
"Not that you'll have a chance to be in the top rankings or anything…" I am tired of Peter and everyone calling me "Stiff". I am Dauntless now. That's all that matters. Why does it bother them anyway? There is no point for him to be mean to me just because I am being nice. Sure this is Dauntless and no one cares about manners or anything, but bravery doesn't mean to be a jerk to everyone you see.
"Stop!" I yell out at him. Even when I straighten my back he still towers over me. This makes him laugh more. "Stop what?" I think of what to say. "Stop treating me like I'm nothing! Stop calling me stiff! Just stop being a coward!" It feels good to yell at him for a change. "This is really exhausting! I get it you don't like me, but you don't have to hurt me every chance you get!" I scream at him. He steps back, shocked. Then he starts laughing. He laughs. My face warms up with anger boiling through me.
When the door flies open he instantly stops. Four and Eric march in together. My heart stops beating for a second. When Peter sees that they had walked in, he scurries away, leaving me alone with the two instructors. Four walks towards me, while Eric stands by the door with his arms crossed. As he approaches, I notice a large red mark across his face form where I hit him. I look down at my shoes, trying to avoid eye contact with him. His feet stop right in front of me. "Sorry," I mumble under my breath before looking up to be met with his deep blue eyes. He gestures for me towards the door. As much as I'd like to sprint somewhere else, I really have no choice.