A/N: This is my first Grey's Anatomy fic, so I'd really appreciate a little R&R. Since I've been watching the show, Meredith and Addison never really had a talk about what happened in their lives. So consider this a sort-of friendship piece.

Addison Montgomery sighed to herself as she nursed her martini at Joe's. It had been a long shift, no, a long week. Five surgeries in one week. Two fatalities in one week. And she wanted to forget it all.

She didn't even look up as a shadow swept over her, and a warm body sat down on the barstool next to her. "Tequila, on the rocks," a familiar female voice said to Joe. Addison still didn't bother to look up. "Addison?" the voice asked.

Addison reluctantly lifted her head to see none other than Meredith Grey sitting on the barstool next to her. "Dr. Grey," she said, a sardonic tone slipping into her voice.

"Are you drunk?" Meredith asked as Joe placed her glass of tequila in front of her.

The elder doctor tucked a strand of red hair behind her ear as she looked at Meredith. "Not yet," she replied, draining her glass. "But the night is young." She motioned to Joe for another one and looked back at the intern. "Don't tell me you actually care, Grey."

Meredith shrugged. "Not really." She threw back the tequila and motioned to Joe, who handed Addison another martini and Meredith another shot of tequila. "But if you've had the day that I had, I figured you'd wanna talk."

Addison chuckled. "I didn't figure you for a talking kind of person, Grey, especially to someone like me."

"Lots of liquor helps," Meredith replied, tossing back another one. Joe silently poured her some more as she watched the attending surgeon.

Addison swirled the olives in her liquid around the glass. She sighed. "Two fatalities." She caught Meredith's eyes. "Two freakin' patients, dead. In one crappy week. A preexisting heart condition in one woman. We nearly lost her baby too. And a lung defect in a premie. Died two days after being born."

Meredith played with her glass. "That's rough. Really rough."

Addison chuckled again and looked down at her glass. "God, you're really good at this making-me-feel-better crap."

The corners of Meredith's mouth turned up in a half-smile. "I've had a lot of practice lately."

"Seriously?"

"Seriously." Meredith smiled and Addison laughed. "With everything between George and Izzy, and George and Callie, and Burke and Cristina…" She looked at Addison. "Life's been rough all around the past couple of months."

Addison sipped her drink. "Yeah." She glanced over at the dartboards, where two guys were competing for drinks. "You've had some scares yourself."

Meredith laughed. "You mean, almost drowning?"

"Yeah, I mean almost drowning," Addison replied, smiling.

"Yeah, I guess so."

"And now?"

Meredith sighed. "Things change. I changed." She caught Addison looking at her with a quizzical expression on her face. "I can't really explain it. I need more." Addison nodded and sipped her drink again. "You know, when you almost die, your perspective on life changes. What was important isn't really important anymore. What wasn't important suddenly becomes an obsession."

"Seriously?"

Meredith laughed again. "Seriously." She tossed back another shot of tequila and motioned to Joe to keep them coming.

Addison watched as Joe handed her another glass. "God, you can really put that stuff away."

"You should see me when I'm in a really bad mood."

Addison giggled, a sound Meredith had never heard from her before. The elder surgeon looked up to see the intern staring at her. "Believe it or not, sometimes I do know how to relax."

Meredith blushed slightly. "I- I never said…"

Addison shook her head and grinned. "I was kidding."

"Oh."

Addison drained her glass and motioned for another. Joe shook his head slightly and filled another glass for her. Addison stirred it with her olives. "You honestly think I don't know what you interns say about me?"

Meredith stared at her, shocked. "What?"

Addison looked her in the eye. "C'mon. I hear the whispers behind my back. I'm a hardass, I know. I'm an adulterous bitch, I know that too. I'm the Wicked Witch of the East." She raised her glass to her lips. "You really think I don't know about all that?"

Meredith didn't say anything.

"Don't worry about it. I'm sure I deserved a lot of it. Showing up here out of nowhere, ruining you and McDreamy, stepping in where I really didn't belong. They're your friends, of course they're going to stay loyal to you."

They sat in silence for several minutes, both nursing their drinks. Meredith sighed and drained her glass. Joe came over to refill it, but she stopped him. She looked at Addison and put her hand on her arm. "I'm sorry I ruined your marriage, Addison."

Addison looked her straight in the eye. "My marriage was over long before you came along, Meredith. And it was my fault. I slept with Mark, I cheated on Derek. I thought I still had a place in his life. I honestly thought I deserved a second chance. And I deserved all that you guys threw at me." She sipped her drink. "And you know what?" She leaned in conspiratorily. "I see a little bit of myself in you."

Meredith smiled. "Seriously?"

"Seriously." Addison smiled back at the intern and hesitantly placed her hand on top of Meredith's. "You wanna be happy. You wanna save lives, and you wanna be happy. And you're willing to sacrifice to get there. There's nothing wrong with that."

Meredith took a deep breath. "You aren't the only adulterous bitch, Addison."

Addison smiled, and a tear trickled down her cheek. "Believe me, I forgave you a long time ago for that. You didn't know that he was married, and you weren't to blame for everything that happened with me and Derek."

"But I slept with him after I knew he was married."

Addison smiled. "I know."

Meredith looked at her, shocked.

"You thought I didn't know those were your panties I found in his tuxedo pocket?"

"I don't know what I thought."

Addison sighed. "In a way, I should thank you. I knew then that my marriage was over. I couldn't make him happy, like you made him happy."

Meredith harrumphed. "I don't know about that any more."

Addison squeezed her hand gently. "He loves you. Whole-heartedly. You're a very lucky woman, because he's a great guy. He won't hurt you."

"He already did."

"Not the way I hurt him. I slept with another man. I slept with a man that was basically his brother. I screwed up."

"I should've waited."

"Life is full of 'should-haves', Meredith." Addison sighed again. "If there's one thing I learned through all of this, you can't dwell on those, because they eat you up inside." Addison patted Meredith's hand lightly. "You're going to make a great surgeon one day, Meredith. But to get there, you can't let the 'maybes' and the 'what-ifs' affect you. What if I hadn't cheated on Derek? I would have stayed with a man who was distant, in a cold marriage with two career-focused people trying to coexist."

"What if you hadn't lost two patients this week?"

Addison smiled. "I wouldn't be sitting here getting drunk with you. And frankly, at this moment, I feel a helluva lot better about a lot of things."

Meredith grinned back at her. "Me too."

"I'd be feeling pretty good after four tequila shots."

"You have no room to talk. Three martinis?"

"Four."

"Seriously?"

Addison laughed. "I've been meaning to ask you. What's with the whole 'seriously' thing?"

"Hell if I know." Meredith glanced at Addison and laughed.

Addison finished her drink and tossed a fifty on the bar. "My treat," she said over Meredith's protests. She bent down to pick up her bag, then stopped and leaned over to Meredith. "None of this ever gets to the other interns. Hear me, Grey?"

"My lips are sealed."

Addison smiled. "Great, now you're drunk."

"You wanna know how I handle a crappy day? I get drunk and I pick up inappropriate men." She grinned at Addison. "That's how I picked up your husband."

"Oh-kay, way too much information there. I think it's time for me to call a cab and get some sleep." Addison turned and headed for the door.

"Hey, Addison."

Addison turned and faced the intern.

"Just so you know, I lied before. When I said I didn't care."

Addison smiled genuinely. "Yeah. Me too." She started to turn around, then stopped. "Hey, Meredith."

Meredith raised an eyebrow at her.

"Any time you wanna talk, instead of picking up inappropriate men..." She hesitated and took a deep breath. "Seriously, let me know. Just make sure your little friends aren't around." Addison smiled and pushed open the door, stepping out into the Seattle rain.

Meredith turned around on her barstool and fingered her tequila glass. She smiled to herself. "Seriously," she whispered, and emptied her glass.

Well, what did you thing? Please review!!!