Soni
(Inspired by the song "Jolene" by Dolly Parton)
Switch: Soni, can I talk to you for a minute?
Soni: Sure, what's on your mind Switchy?
Switch: Well, it's come to my attention that you've had your eyes on Apoc and well…I really like Apoc and would like you to keep you're bored-game-playing hands off of him!...Please.
Soni: Um, let me think about that….NO!
Switch: If I sang you a song would it change your mind?
Soni: No, but it never hurt to try…
Switch: Soni, Soni, Soni, Soni
I'm beggin' of you please don't take Apoc
Soni, Soni, Soni, Soni
Please don't take him just because you hate me
Soni: Well I wouldn't say hate…
Switch: You really are an ugly girl
With an ugly face and stupid hair
With nasty skin and eyes a sickly green
Your smile could kill a mile away
Your voice is like a screeching rat
And I can easily compete with you Soni
Soni: Well aren't you a son of a--
Switch: He talks about you in his sleep
And there's nothing I could to keep
From killing him when you says your name *shudder* Soni
And I can hardly understand how someone like you could take my man
Cause he means nothing to you Soni
Soni:--bitch…
Switch: Soni, Soni, Soni, Soni
I'm beggin of you please don't take Apoc
Soni, Soni, Soni, Soni
Please don't take him just because you hate me.
Soni: Yet again, I wouldn't say I hate you…
Switch: You can have you choice of men
And I could finally love again
Cause Apoc means the world to me Soni
I have to have this talk with you
Your life really depends on you
And whatever your choice is Soni
Soni: I'd still choose Apoc…
Switch: Soni, Soni, Soni, Soni
I'm beggin' of you please don't take Apoc
Soni, Soni, Soni, Soni
Please don't take him even though you are
Soni, Soni
Soni: Um…okay thank God that's over.
Switch: I hope I've opened your eyes on a few things.
Soni: Sure has…you're crazy, obsessed, and you just threatened to kill Apoc!
Switch: Hey! Cut me some slack. I only has five minutes!
Soni: Yeah, well sorry but Apoc is still mine. So I guess you just wasted five minutes of your life. Later Switchy!
-Soni skips sway happily to the mess hall leaving Switch standing there dumbfounded and pissed.
Switch: YOU WILL DIE!!
END