Hello minna! I'm back! And since it's already Christmas break, I can finally continue my other stories. But before that, I'll post this one shot, I need to get the right momentum anyway. And I want to apologize, it had been months!
Anyway, I want you to enjoy this oneshot AoKaga. Probably angst, but! You know me. I love angst with happy endings, so don't worry it is happy ending.
Warning: Not edited, expect grammatical mistakes, angst (?) shouned ai. and OOCness ahead. So if you don't want it, better leave.
Disclaimer: The characters are not mine. KnB is not mine.
Aomine's decision
They said, when you meet the person you'll end up with, what do you call that again? Oh yeah, soul mate. When you meet your soul mate, you'll know that he's the one. That the two of you will end up together or shit like that. Now wait a minute, why am I thinking such sappy things in the first place? Boredom. That's it right?
What the hell, I'm blaming Tetsu and Satsuki here. Satsuki once told me that she knew it was Tetsu, that they're soul mates. Now, looking at them while slicing their wedding cake and posing in front of the camera with smiles that stating "I'm the King of the world" I'd call it woman's instincts.
"Oi Aominecchi!" Kise called out. He's heading towards the newly wed. "Come here, let's take a group picture with Kurokocchi and Momoicchi!"
It should have been me and him. It was times like this where I remember him the most, not that I don't remember him always. Way back in high school, I believed it was fate that brought him to us, to me. I always believed that he was my destined rival. Well, he is. He will always be Aomine Daiki's destined rival.
"You're so noisy Kise." I stand beside Satsuki and smiled a little in front of the camera.
"I really want to eat now." Murasakibara commented which made Midorima rolled his eyes and Akashi look seriously at the giant baby.
If he is here today, he'd be standing at the opposite side. Maybe hanging his arms behind Tetsu's neck and flash that bright smile of his. If he is here today, he'd probably agree to Murasakibara's statement. And I'll be teasing him about his big appetite and he'd try to punch me, instead, he'll hit Kise. If he's here, Akashi and Midorima had already reprimanded him. If he's here, maybe Satsuki will not smile sadly when she looks at me. Damn it, if he's here, I won't feel this bitter.
Kagami Taiga is my soul mate. No, scratch that. Let me paraphrase it. Kagami Taiga WAS my soul mate. I knew it was him. I know, he is. He will always be.
I don't really believe in heaven nor hell. But ever since that day, the idea that heaven exists and that he's there watching over me, not feeling any pain, living a life full of happiness, that thought is too good to be true, yet very much comforting. So before I sleep, I always talk to the big guy over there. Asking Him to tell Kagami that I'm doing great, at least better than the previous day, and that I miss him so much. Very much it's making me insane.
"Aomine-kun." Tetsu said.
"Hmmn?"
"Thank you for coming here today." He said. "Do you remember three years ago? He asked.
Well how am I going to forget? Three years ago, it was that Bakagami who planned this surprise date of Tetsu and Satsuki because according to him, "I'm getting tired of Momoi trying to seduce Kuroko. They're doing a lot of damage in my team more than they can imagine!"
"Of course." I smiled. "If it weren't because of him, there won't be a wedding today." I chuckled, remembering his face when Kuroko manned up enough to kiss Satsuki.
"I believe, that wherever Kagami-kun right now, he's happy." Kuroko is looking at a distance, as if waiting for the redhead to enter the scene.
"He'll be jumping in happiness right now. He's such a child you know." I added. "If he's here…" I won't feel shit. I wanted to say, instead, "He had already ate up all the food!"
Tetsu and I shared a few minutes remembering that glutton. Man, I think I'm really a masochist. But forgetting everything about him, nah, that's too much. That is more painful. That is shittier. I think it's worth the pain, at least I still remember his face, his voice, though a bit dull by now, his warmth. Yep, I'm really a masochist.
"Aomine-kun." Kuroko called once again. "You know, I think Kagami-kun also wanted you to be happy."
"Not this again Tetsu." I sighed. "It's just what, two years."
"You should at least try." He smiled, such pitiful look.
"I don't want to forget him." I whispered.
"I'm not saying that you have to forget him Aomine-kun. What I'm trying to say—"
"What you're trying to say Tetsu, is for me to move on. To what, look for someone, replace him. Be happy without him. I can't do that." I said flatly.
"Aomi—"
"Tetsu, at least let me do this. Let me handle my problem."
"Do you think he's happy when you're like this?" Kuroko fisted his hands.
"Tetsu!" I shouted. "Tetsu, I don't want to forget him."
"I'm not saying that—"
"If it weren't because of me, he'll be here right now. Tetsu because of me, your best friend died! Can't you understand? This is the only way that I can continue living this life. I deserve it man. I do." I sobbed. It's a good thing that we're outside the reception right now or else.
"It's not your fault Aomine-kun."
"It was. It is Tetsu. You know it is." I took a deep breath and controlled my tears. "At least let me pay for what I've done." Tetsu was silent for a few seconds. The fact that he looks away proves that he also know that it was my fault. That I'm the cause of Kagami's death.
"If God gives me a chance, even just a day, to be with that idiot once again, I'll make sure that at least the ending is different."
"What do you mean?"
"You know, at least I'll tell him how much I love him and how much he means to me. I'm not really going to change the fact that he's going to die. I just want to change the last words that he heard from me." This time, my tears once again fell down. "I've been asking and praying to whoever that controls everything, at least tell Kagami how much I love him."
Tetsu did the right thing afterwards. He left me alone. I just wanted to go home and sleep. Maybe I'd dream about our happy days. Actually, I did, the other night, and I never have wanted to wake up ever again.
"Aomine let's go home." Kagami pleaded.
"No, why would I? This shit just harassed Satsuki in front of us and we're just going to let it slide?!" I shouted back.
"But you already beat him to pulp asshole! Let's just go before his friends arrive, what if there's a bunch of them?" Kagami grabbed my hands and forcing me to follow him.
"Coward." I whispered.
"What did you say?" Kagami said, controlling his anger.
"I said you're a coward. I can't believe I'm dating a coward like you! I can't believe you'd just let it slide like that! I can't believe it, oh my God, why am I dating you, and I don't think you'd end up like a fucking pussy!" I shook my head and laughed sarcastically.
Kagami waited until I calmed down and then said, "You know what asshole, and I'm just trying to save our asses back there. Because…" the way Kagami is talking, his calm and unshaking voice made the hairs at the back of my neck stand up, "I love you."
And with that, he left me standing in the middle of the street.
I woke up before the dream gets to the worst part. I hate it when my brain chooses that time to recall. I can't…
I look at the clock on the small table beside my bed, it's already half past six in the morning. "Good morning Bakagami." I closed my eyes. It became a ritual since that day where I receive the phone call from Kagami's brother.
What am I going to do today? Practice? But our coach told us to rest for two weeks since the finals ended three days ago. I became a professional basketball player here in Japan anyway. Not because it was my dream, I admit that I'm at my happiest when I play basketball, but it's with Kagami. Though he's the one who always wanted to go pro and I wanted to enter the police academy before, I don't think I can let the world forget him. His plays. The thing is, I can't jump as high as he can nor I can't help but to have my own style. I just want to make his dreams come true.
What am I going to do today? Oh right, breakfast. And then what? Bath… then after that, grocery, then I think I need to run and play a few minutes…then what?
I need to plan what I'm going to do today, or else I'll end up lazing around and sleeping the whole day. That idiot hated it when I'm not doing something productive so I have to do something at least.
"Hey Ahomine, wake up will you?" He peered in my vision.
"What the hell are you doing here anyway?" I asked while going back to my dreamland.
"Your mom told me that you're being a lazy bastard again so I came here to make you do something productive."
"Go away man. It's the weekend" I groaned.
"No way!" He came closer, I can feel it because his breath is tickling my ears. "Wake up!" He shouted in my ears and that made me jump.
"Fuck! Are you trying to ruin my eardrums you Bakagami?!" I pinned him down while glaring. "You're going to pay for that!"
"See, you're up." He kissed my nose before standing up. "Let's go somewhere and-"
"You mean, 'Let's go outside and play basketball'" I rolled my eyes.
"Oh come on dude!" He clicked his tongue. "It's better than sleeping whole day! The weather's too nice for that."
"Yes yes Kagami-sama. Wake me up after five minutes, let me just kiss Mai-chan in my dreams."
"Not letting you asshole. Now get up before I'll call your mom and tell her that you don't want to get up."
The days are so much easier when that asshole is here. Better get up anyway. You may not believe in me, but there's this little voice in my head saying that Kagami is still alive. I just can't let myself hope that much. But still.
Maybe because I never saw his dead body. It's not that I have a choice. I wanted to, so fucking much. But who am I in the first place? I'm just someone who dated him and treated him like he's not important. Besides the fact that it's my fault. Of course his family won't let me see him. Though it's not just me, but the other miracles too, Tetsu is an exemption.
Two months after the doctor concluded that Kagami is in coma and had only ten per cent chance of waking up again, his dad finally decided to bring him back to America.
"I need to go back, my leave is almost over. I'm also taking my son with me. I think there are better doctors out there." Kagami-san told me. I know he's not against our relationship but I also know that he only thought that it's just confusion. "So Aomine-kun, please let me take care of my son." And he cried. In front of me. Who am I exactly to tell him that Kagami had to stay because he needs me?
The first month ever since Kagami's comatose body was brought back to America, I've been pestering his brother about his condition. I always receive a short reply like 'He's fine. Though he's still sleeping.'
It was hell. I don't know what to do exactly. My mind will just think of all the possibilities. Negative possibilities. And without Tetsu or Satsuki's accompany, I don't think ending up in a mental institution is impossible.
"You have to be strong Aomine-kun." Tetsu said.
"Don't worry Dai-chan! Kagamin is a strong person. Maybe tomorrow or the next day, he'll wake up. You don't know, you're already answering his call." Satsuki added.
"I'm trying." I replied, smiled, and continue living.
Two more months passed and my emails to Kagami's brother lessened. Not because I wanted to, but because I have to. I always thought that whenever the time Kagami wakes up, I need to be in my best condition. Besides, graduation is coming and there are scouts whom I need to impress. For both our sakes, I have to be, just what Tetsu said, strong.
The thing about Kagami's brother is that he always reply via email. That's why at the sixth month since Kagami's accident, four months since I last saw him, when my phone rings in the middle of the night and showing an unknown number, my heart skips.
It took all my courage to pick up my phone and answer. This is it. My instincts had raised its alarms. That's when I know that I will never hear Bakagami's voice again. It's funny really, those past few months where I can't see that bastard, I feel worried but hopeful at the same time. But when I answered the phone call, I already knew that it was Himuro Tatsuya's voice who will talk.
"Aomine-kun." He said, voice shaking. He's crying. "I'm sorry, but Taiga did not make it."
I just closed my eyes, held the phone tighter than normal, counted one to ten before answering. "I'm sorry." Is all had managed to answer.
"But Aomine-kun." There was a long paused. A very long one, I don't even remember what I did next, just waiting and waiting until the other person manage to utter another word again. "I'm sure Taiga wanted you to be happy. I'm sure of that."
I did not answer. Just letting the tears run down from my face. Taiga, Kagami Taiga, I will never see him again.
"To be honest, I'm feeling lighter." His brother said after a long intake of air. "Taiga, is up there somewhere. He's finally free and smiling."
"Heaven." I managed a small smile. "He is indeed over there."
I don't know how that conversation ended. I can't remember how I managed to sleep again after that. I don't even know how I reacted when Kagami's dad told me that he doesn't want me to show up at his son's burial or funeral. He just told me he's sorry and to move on. I think I manage to protest, but when he said that I should at least respect his decisions, I finally gave up.
When Tetsu went there, he had this conflicted painful expression when I asked him about Kagami. He smiled softly and told me that "don't worry Aomine-kun. He's in peace now."
And with that, I finally accepted the fact that he's dead. Though, as I already said, part of me still believes that he's still alive. Breathing. Sleeping. Out there, under the same sky as mine. Those are the thoughts that gave me the strength to keep on living. Until now, two years had passed since that incident, and I still can't forget how it changed my lives.
A few more minutes since Kagami left me standing in the street, I heard the sound of running in the direction where Kagami headed out. Part of me wanted to hurry up and go see him, but my feet won't move, not when I realized how much I hurt Kagami for snapping and saying that he's a coward. And then I heard his voice, shouting.
My mind recalled what he said a while ago. 'Let's just go before his friends arrive.' That woke me up. "No!" I shouted. "Oh please no!" Again, my instincts are warning me. "He had nothing to do with it." Just one block, one more. And I heard it, the gun shot.
And everything was silent except for my breathing. I realized I stopped running, and my fingers are shaking. I heard set of feet run and it dies out. But then, it was silent again. I don't want to go there anymore. I think I know who receives the bullet. But I have to. Because I need him to live.
Before heading out to the grocery store, Akashi, my previous captain way back in the middle school, called. It was odd actually. He asked me to join him and the other miracles in a dinner, to celebrate something. I don't really want to go but he insisted.
When I arrived, everyone's already present. Something's not right, I can feel it in the air. "What's wrong?" I asked them. Looking at Tetsu first who avoided my gaze.
"Let's eat first." Akashi said, looking directly at Tetsu, then at Murasakibara, and lastly at Kise.
After we ate, believe me, I've wished I regretted Akashi's offer because it was so freaking awkward I can't even swallow my food normally.
"I booked one of the meeting rooms of this hotel. Let's head there." Akashi said, standing first and heading to the elevator.
"Wait, can I just go home now?" I asked. I need to sleep early since I planned running early morning.
Akashi raised his eyebrow and then smiled softly at me. "You need to be there Daiki. Believe me you need to."
With that I followed him, ignoring the fact that Tetsu, Murasakibara, and Kise exchanged a worried look. Midorima is the same as me, clueless and curious.
"All of you are important to me." Akashi started. "You have become my family after all." I glanced at Midorima who gave me the same expression, 'what is going on here?'
"Akashi-kun please wait a minute." Kuroko intervened.
"Tetsuya, you feel the same to us right? We're family right?" With that, Tetsu bit his lips. It was the first time that I saw him looking dejected. Akashi sighed once again. It was also the first time that I saw Akashi so lost like this.
"Akashi what's going on?" Midorima managed to ask.
I pretended that I don't care. I had enough drama in my life, having this kind of conversation to the people I call friend, it just make me look like I'm an idiot. If some of them are falling out, then they don't need to include me or the whole team in the situation. For Pete's sake, they're all grownups! They can fix their own problems dammit.
"Tetsuya, Ryouta, and Atsushi." Akashi eyed them once again. Tetsu is the only one who meets his gaze. Asking, pleading for something. Kise is looking down, as if the carpet became the most controversial thing in this world, while Murasakibara played with his fingers. "I am so disappointed in you."
Silence.
"How can you let it happen for two years?" Akashi continued.
"What is really going on here? Can someone explain it to me?" This time asked them. First, I have this feeling that I'm somewhat involved. And second, when Akashi said 'two years', I think Kagami is somewhat involved as well. But how?
"Daiki, why don't you ask the three of them?" Akashi said, tone warning.
"Akashi-kun please understand it." Tetsu started.
"You of all people Tetsuya, should be the one who should understand." Akashi answered in his calm voice. "You, among all of us here, is Daiki and Taiga's best friend."
"Kagami?" Now I'm sure, we really are part of this whole thing that they're talking about.
"Can someone please explain the whole situation? Kise?" Midorima once again tried to ask.
"I'm, I'm so sorry." Kise said. He choked. "I, I was, b-but, when I saw Ka-kagamicchi…"
"Saw him? When? Two years ago?" I'm starting to get frustrated now. "Why are you bringing up that now huh?!"
"He's alive Daiki." Akashi looked at me and said it straight in my face just like that.
"What? How? Stop joking around!" I'm shaking in anger. "Stop dragging him here okay? Let the guy rest for fuck's sake." I glared at them. "He received a bullet in his head. The fact that he was able to live for a few months in coma after that is already a miracle. And now you're telling me that he's alive!" I kicked the metal chair beside me. "Stop it please. Please."
"Daiki please listen to me. I'm not lying. I saw him last week when I had this meeting in America. I'm sure it was him."
"How can you say that?!" I shouted again. Counting one to ten and closing my eyes. "How can you say that?" I managed to say it again in a calmer tone.
"Is-is that the reason why you gave me the hair samples for DNA the other week?" Midorima asked. "They're Kagami's?"
Akashi nodded. "What? You think it's mine and a long lost son?"
"No, I was, where did you get it anyway?" Midorima asked.
Akashi was silent for a few minutes before awkwardly answering and looking at me guiltily. "You always know that I have this thing for Taiga right?" The question is directed at me.
"You had?" I don't know that. I don't really care. He's alive? That's what my stupid mind is thinking. But that's impossible right? "Stop this joke around okay? It's not funny. I forgive you guys for this so please stop and let's just let him rest." I whispered.
"Yes I have." Present tense, so that means until now. Akashi ignored what I said after that. "I kept a few hair strands of Taiga in my wallet when he lost to our one-one-one with the consequence of him shaving his head." Akashi chuckled.
So that's the reason why he did that! Now one mystery had been solved.
"And when I had this meeting last week in America, I accidentally bumped into him in the hotel that I was checking in. I already knew it was him, but the idea of him being alive after all this years, it was impossible." Akashi crossed his hands in his chest. "That's when I asked one of my body guards to keep an eye on him and get something, a spit, a nail, anything, for a DNA examination."
Akashi smiled this time, tears also flowing from his eyes but he managed to wipe it with his handkerchief. "Daiki, the result matched. It's Taiga."
"What?" I paled. What am I going to do now? If it's true, then why? How?
"The thing is, Tetsuya, Ryouta and Atsushi, all of them knew from the start."
"And yet they kept it from us." Midorima finished, massaging the bridge of his nose as he took off his eye glasses.
"Tetsu?" I asked him, eyes watering, and heart beating faster, palms sweating. I don't care whether they betrayed me or not, or whether this is a dream, oh gods, let it be reality please. "Is this true?"
Before answering me, Tetsu looked at me apologizing. "Yes Aomine-kun."
"Then…w-why?" I asked, voice shaking.
"They asked me to." He whispered. "Can you please listen to me, to the whole story before reacting?"
I nodded. HE IS ALIVE ALL THIS TIME.
"Himuro-kun told me that when he called you that night, Kagami-kun indeed woke up, but after a minute or two, he started having this seizure. He was shaking all over and his heart monitor is going crazy, but the thing is, he woke up and the very first word he uttered was your name Aomine-kun. The doctors told them it's better if they get the bullet out of his head.
After injecting some calming drug in his system, his dad agreed to the operation. The doctor said the chances of him surviving the operation is less than ending up dead. But Kagami-san said to go on. That night, his heart failed once again during the operation and that's when Himuro-kun called you. They already accepted that he's not going to make it."
"But he made it?" I laughed. I can't believe it. This is ridiculous. This is a dream.
"After three more days, he woke up. The doctor said it was a success, but…"
"But?" Now I'm shaking my head, I don't really want to pinch my hands and feel nothing, I want this dream to go on.
"He can't remember anything. Not his dad, not his name, not Himuro-kun, and not even basketball. Except for the basics of life like reading, computing, eating… and when I went there, I was expecting a funeral. I don't know how happy I am, how excited I am to tell all of you the good news."
"Why did you not tell us Tetsuya? And why did you plan to keep it forever? If I did not saw him, if I did not go there…" Akashi's poise is slowly crumbling.
"His dad asked me to. It's because he's scared, he's got overprotective of him. I did not even manage to talk to him face to face, I wanted to hug him and tell him who I am but I can't. He's my best friend too, of course I love him. But they said it was for the better."
Silence once again.
"I also feel guilty you know. If only I was able to convince Satsuki-san to stay at home during that night, then she won't be harassed by that guy. If that did not happen, Aomine-kun won't have to beat him up. Then that group won't retaliate, won't hurt Kagami-kun in the first place."
"But why did you not tell me Tetsu? If they told me that it was for Kagami's sake, then I will happily stay away." I sobbed. "I just, all this time, he's alive, breathing and living, all this time? I just wanted someone to tell me that he's okay."
"I keep telling you that right?"
"But the fact that knowing that he's dead, and the last words are the harshest things I can ever say, would you thing I can believe you that he's okay?" I'm going crazy. Literally. "How did I not know while they know?" I'm talking about Kise and Murasakibara.
"Muro-chin asked me the same thing they asked Kurochin." He looked dow. "I-I'm sorry Minecchin."
"It was an accident-ssu." Kise explained, though there are tears in his eyes. "When I had this photoshoot in America four months ago, I bumped into Kagamicchi. I did not actually believed that it was him, but I followed him since I got curious. Then I saw Himuro-san fetched him up. I called Kurokocchi immediately."
I shook my head, feeling betrayed.
"I swear I wanted to tell you the truth Aominecchi. But, seeing him smiling like that, I think I want to let him stay that way. Sorry."
"I wanted to see him."
"Aomine-kun…"
"No, please let me. I won't go near him. Or even if I go near him, if he won't remember me or if I saw him doing great, I will stay away. I don't need you to tell me that. I love him so much! Just let me apologize. And I'll move on." I said.
I saw Tetsu inhaled and smiled. "About time Aomine-kun." He looks like a huge bolder had been lifted off his shoulders.
"He's alive. And that's all that matters." I answered, finally letting myself feel a bit happiness since two years ago. "Guess I need to book my flight and get ready."
"I'm going too." Akashi said. And as I look at the faces around me, it's concluded, we're all going.
That night, I dreamed about the first time that I saw him. Limping and trying to play basketball even though he's injured. I never thought I would recall that moment again. I'll see you soon Bakagami.
The ending is up to you. So better make it is a happy one 'cause for me it'll be. Anyways I think I can continue my other ffics since I'm not that busy anymore. Sorry again, it took me months before updating. Gosh, it had been a year since the AoKaga bug had bitten me and I still love them so much!