IDIL'S Note: Hello! Yes, yes, time for another IDIL special! ;D Hope you enjoy!
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.
Love is a crazy thing.
The point is we can't help who we fall in love with. - Anonymous
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With Obito it was like flying, only you were going downwards; it was much like falling up. Nothing really made sense, but you didn't care. You took the leap and you soared. The fall down was relaxing, and you knew that at the end someone would catch you. You didn't know when or where, but you flew down with the certainty ingrained in your mind that he would catch you, even if it were just before you were to crash.
As you fell, everything was light. You floated as if in slow motion. You were feathery light, lighter than air, and you could feel everything around you. You flipped onto your back a few times on the way down, just to be able to fully appreciate the bright yellow sun as its rays smiled down on you beautifully. With Obito, falling in love wasn't an obligation; it was a choice. One you willingly made and almost never regretted thereafter.
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With Kakashi, falling was easy too, maybe even easier than with Obito; it was effortless, but it seemed as though the reason you fell was uncontrollable. You hadn't taken the leap; you'd been tripped or pushed and the last thing you saw before you fell was a sickeningly sweet smile plastered on that silver-haired face; it was hard to tell whether it was one of adoration or whether the glint in his eyes really was the malice you feared.
The fall down was relaxing, up to a certain point, after which you realized that you had been falling too much, for too long, too fast. There was no way to struggle against the effects of his love's gravity now, and it was a love that left you more frightened than happy. You worried that you might never stop. Either that or you'd abruptly crash.
It became doubtful what was more disconcerting: the fact that you could be falling forever, consumed by a bottomless pit until you faded into the dark oblivion, or the fact that at any minute ground would appear and you would crash. Hard. So hard in fact that you would shatter on impact. And you'd lay there, all broken and mangled, a sorry heap of forgotten flesh, regretting that you'd ever let yourself even consider falling while at the same time you wondered, feared that you'd never be able to get back up again. The weight of his love was felt in the atmospheric pressure, and it was so great that it threatened to rip the life force out of you, suffocating your lungs.
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Well, Rin had looked over the edge already and was near certain she could see her shattered body at the bottom. She knew now it was inevitable who she would fall for. The control had been ripped out of her hands. She saw him coming, that same sweet smile she knew would be on his face, and immediately she knew what was next. But even so, she couldn't just let it happen.
So Rin took the opportunity and pushed him first. She would see on the way down if and how he changed, and that make her ultimate decision. Since she had turned and pushed him first, it was now he who was falling for her, and just like that, she now had the control. If he would get better, if his love would become more like Obito's, if he would become a better person, she would be like the saviour and rush down to catch him.
If he were to remain the same and not display any real love for her, if he were not to care, then she would let him fall, that same horrifyingly sweet smile he had given her plastered on her own face. It's true that she was kinder than him, and wanted nothing but the best for him. But hey, the girl had to look out for herself first. And if he would do nothing but hurt her, she would need to break him in order for herself to remain whole.