Disclaimer: I do not own the Dragon Ball franchise.
"Ningen. Ningen. Ningen. Ningen. Ninge-"
"Zamasu."
Zamasu's thoughts were interrupted by Gowasu saying his name. The green Shinjin turned his head to the yellow skinned Supreme Kai who was sitting at the table with him in the middle of their Sacred World's house. He then recalled the task he had before he got lost in his thoughts and quickly poured tea into Gowasu's cup, who then drank it as Zamasu sat back down at the table.
"What troubles you, Zamasu? I can tell you are thinking about something you do not like." Gowasu says, making Zamasu look slightly away from him and at the ground.
"I am fine, Gowasu sama. Nothing troubles me." Zamasu says.
"I'm not sure you are, Zamasu. You aren't even looking me in the eyes." Gowasu points out, making Zamasu look at him again.
"I think you need a break, Zamasu." Gowasu says, making Zamasu give him a surprised look.
"A break? No, I-" Zamasu begins to say.
"No. I think you need a break from making tea for me so much." Gowasu starts.
"But I have nothing else to do." Zamasu says. 'Other than eliminate you, take the time ring, attain immortality and eradicate all Ningens.' Zamasu mentally says.
"I have an idea. Come with me." Gowasu says as he stands, making Zamasu stand and follow him. Gowasu then leads him into his house and to a room Zamasu had never even been into.
"Here." Gowasu says as he opens the door, revealing a room that didn't look much different from the others in the house. Gowasu then steps inside and gestures Zamasu towards a desk in the room with a computer on top of it. "Why don't you occupy yourself by browsing the Godnet?" Gowasu suggests. Zamasu's curiosity is piqued
"I'm not sure, Gowasu sama. I've never used Godtube before, let alone the Godnet." Zamasu says.
"It's nothing to worry about, Zamasu. Browsing the Godnet is as simple as brewing tea. All you do is use the keyboard and mouse." Gowasu says.
"What is there even to do on it?" Zamasu says.
"Many things. You can watch Godtube, browse Godgle, play games, search for stuff on Godpedia, draw things in Godpaint, use the tissues on the ground over there in case you browse the more special things that can be found on the Godnet, look at blogs on Godblr, browse Goddit, look at the nonsense on Know Your Deity, download God Block Plus to stop those annoying Ads, post anonymously on GodChan, peruse art and drawings on DeviantGod, make a social media profile on Divinitter, or buy stuff from Godazon or Godbay...actually...don't buy anything, I have very limited funds right now." Gowasu says.
"...I suppose it couldn't hurt." Zamasu says.
"Good. I'll leave you to it then. I'm going to go watch mortals beat each other up on Godtube to entertain myself." Gowasu says as he steps out and closes the door behind himself. "Ningens..." Zamasu mentally utters upon hearing 'mortals'.
Zamasu looked at the computer and then sat down in the chair in front of the desk after a few seconds. He pressed the start button on the computer, booting it up. He waited as it loaded up and brought him to the desktop. He gave a confused look at Gowasu's background, which appeared to be of something called 'Battlestar Galactica'. He never knew Gowasu was a nerd.
Zamasu then brought the cursor to click on the search engine, Godnet Explorer, but was interrupted by Gowasu hastily entering the room. Zamasu gave Gowasu a surprised expression.
"I forgot to warn you." Gowasu says as he points to something on the desktop labeled as 'Firefox'. "Do not click on that. That brings you to the Internet. The web that mortals browse. I do not think you are ready to gaze upon what lies there." Gowasu says. "Right. Have fun." Gowasu then leaves. Zamasu looks at the Firefox icon with disgust. He would never in one million years look at the web Ningens used.
And after one hour of doing all but one of the things Gowasu said there was to do, Zamasu became bored with the computer. As Zamasu was about to get up and leave, his gaze fell upon the Firefox icon. He moved the cursor over it to open it but stopped as he realized what he was doing. "What am I thinking? I would never look at what the Ningens browse on their computers." Zamasu said mentally. But curiosity overtook him and he failed to resist it. He then clicked on it and opened Firefox.
Zamasu then stared at the blank new tab for a moment before looking at the bookmarks. He then reluctantly clicked on one. He waited as it loaded, waiting to see what horrible things the stupid Ningens created on their web. The page loaded and began playing a video of cats. Zamasu became confused.
"What...is this? ...Cats? No, this can't be right. Ningens are evil, they don't create things such as this. They don't create videos of cute cats. This can't be right...can it?" He thought as he clicked on another one of the bookmarks, bringing him to another video, this time one playing a song. A melody being played in violin.
"This music...it's too beautiful to be created by evil Ningens...they couldn't have created such a good tune...this has to be the work of a God plagiarized by Ningens..." Zamasu says in denial as he continuously looks through the bookmarks. All bringing up things Zamasu doubted were created by Ningens. Poetry, philosophy, inspirational quotes, more cat videos, music, art, architecture. science. Zamasu couldn't bring himself to believe that all of this stuff he was viewing was made by an evil such as the Ningens. Zamasu then questioned himself. "Could I be wrong about all mortals being evil?"
Zamasu shakes the thought and remains convinced that all mortals are evil by nature and use their god given wisdom for evil. He continues to browse the internet.
"Hmm..." Zamasu looked over images of things that were called "memes". "What sense does any of this make?" Zamasu questioned as he looked at one of a man pointing to his temple with text that said 'You can't get fired if you don't have a job'. "What ignoramuses were behind these?" He thought. He then decided to look at something else.
He then found himself at a certain fourth chan. He clicked randomly through it to find anything that would interest him, and almost didn't, until he came upon a raid being organized. "Ningens, does their evil know no bounds? Why are they plotting to find and take down a white flag of all things? They are capable of hating anything, even something as mundane as a flag. They are a true evil." Zamasu thinks.
Zamasu then found the Ningens praising a "God" they called 'Kek' on the Internet. "What blaspheme is this? Why are they all giving their praise to a false deity like this? It's a frog. It's just a frog with an ugly face. Could they really believe in such a blasphemous thing? This is sinfulness and impiety to the real Gods! This is only the result of Kai's not becoming more directly involved with mortals like the Hakaishin!" Zamasu thought.
Zamasu then pondered if the Ningen's Internet could be connected to the Godnet. He wondered if the Ningens knew anything about the true deities and decided to test his theory. He opened up a new tab and typed his name into the search bar. The results loaded on a page called 'Google'. He then noticed the similarity between Godgle and Google, and the similarities between Godtube and the website called Youtube. "What a ripoff." He thought as he looked at the results. He became shocked when he saw plenty of things being brought up that listed his name. His eyes widened when he saw pictures of himself pop up.
"How...how did this get on here? How do the Ningens know of my existence? How do they know?! How?!"
Zamasu began to look at everything about himself he could find until he came down to the last result.
'Image list / Zamasu | Gelbooru'
"Hmm?" Zamasu clicked on the link.
"What is this?" Zamasu said to himself as the page finished loaded. His eyes widened and his jaw dropped at the content displayed before him. Almost immediately, Zamasu's fist punctured the screen of the computer, destroying it. Zamasu didn't stop there, he then ignited an energy blade from his hand and started chopping the computer and desk to pieces. "NNNIIIIIINNGGGEEEENNNSSS!" Zamasu shouted in anger.
"What is happening in here?!" Gowasu says in distress as he opened the door and entered the room. "Zamasu, what are you doing?!" Gowasu asks while Zamasu continues chopping away at the computer and desk. Gowasu, getting no reply, pulls out his camera and starts filming Zamasu until he stops attacking and chopping the already ruined computer. Gowasu quickly saves the footage and hides the camera behind his back.
"Evil ninge-..." Zamasu took a deep breath and calmed himself, regaining his composure. He then turned to Gowasu. "I-"
"You went on the Mortal web, didn't you?" Gowasu says.
"Yes." Zamasu simply replies.
"And what do you think? Hmm? Do you feel as if you are actually wrong about all mortals being evil? Are you at all beginning to think that maybe not all mortals are bad and use their god given wisdom for evil?" Gowasu starts. "Are you-"
"No and no." Zamasu coldly replies before walking past Gowasu and out of the room. Gowasu frowns slightly and looks at the destroyed computer and desk. "That thing cost me too many God Dollars to buy..." Gowasu says in a sad tone while he stares at his destroyed computer.
"Did you film me during that ordeal?" Zamasu's voice comes. "...No, of course not..." Gowasu says out loud before walking back to the television room. He closes the door behind him and quickly pulls a laptop out from behind the television he uses to watch Godtube.
"Godtuber success, here I come." Gowasu mentally says as he connects his camera to his laptop and uploads the video of Zamasu he filmed to Godtube.
Meanwhile at God of Destruction Rumsshi's palace, Universe 10.
"Hmm? What's this? Gowasu's uploaded a new video?" Rumsshi says as he brings his cursor over and clicks on a video titled "Angry CS:GO player rages and destroys computer.".
"...Hm hm hma...heha...ha ha ha ha ha ha!" He laughed as he watched the video of Zamasu that Gowasu filmed.
Meanwhile at the Sacred World of the Kais, Universe 7.
"Ha! This is the funniest thing I've ever seen! Aha ha ha ha ha!" Old Kai exclaimed as he watched the video of Zamasu on a television.
"It's quite disappointing to see a fellow Shinjin behave in such a way over such a trivial thing." Shin says, not amused at the video unlike Old Kai who is laughing hysterically.
Meanwhile at King Kai's planet.
"HA HA HA HA! AHA HA HA HA! THIS IS TOO FUNNY! I FEEL LIKE I'M GOING TO EXPLODE LIKE THAT TIME GOKU BROUGHT CELL HERE IF I KEEP LAUGHING!" King Kai says while banging his fist against the table he was at lightly. "BUBBLES! STOP REPLAYING THE VIDEO! I CAN'T STOP LAUGHING! HA HA HA HA HA!" King Kai exclaims to Bubbles who keeps clicking the replay button on his computer
Meanwhile at the Omni-Kings palace.
"Heh heh heh heh heh aha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!" Zen-Oh laughed as he watched the video on a tablet while sitting on his throne.
"M'lord, what are you watching?" The Great Priest asks before peeking to see the video. He then places his hand over his mouth and giggles at the video himself.
Meanwhile in Universe 6.
"So, Gowasu's uploaded a new video, huh? Does he honestly believe he of all people could become a popular Godtuber? Ha! As if! But what the heck, I'll watch this video anyway." Champa says, sitting at his computer before clicking on the video. "...Hem...heh...hah...HAH! HA HA HA HA!" Champa laughs.
"Do you find Gowasu's video to be humorous, Champa sama?" Vados asks as she walks up to Champa, he then stops laughing and snorts. "Hunh, of course not. Gowasu's videos aren't funny and he will never become a popular Godtuber. Now, go fetch me some popcorn." Champa says. "As you wish." Vados says as she walks off. Champa looks until she's gone completely and then resumes laughing at the video.
Meanwhile at Beerus' castle.
"Heh..." Beerus chuckled at the video of Zamasu, laid back on a couch watching a television. "Hmm. This reminds me of how angry you got over pudding that one time." Whis says as he walks in, making Beerus lower his ears and quietly growl in irritation.
Back at the Sacred World of the Kais, Universe 10.
"I swear to the Omni-King, I'm never touching another computer ever again. The terrible wrath I'll unleash on the Ningens for creating such terrible artwork of me will be so grave, that generations yet unborn will cry out in anguish." Zamasu mentally tells himself as he walks into the room Gowasu was in and set's down a cup of tea on the table in front of him.
"Thank you, Zamasu. Tea brewed by the pure-hearted is free of imperfections and is truly delicious." Gowasu says as he watches Godtube.
Zamasu then glances at the television Gowasu was watching and seen a video of himself when he destroyed the computer. "Gowasu sama, who recorded that?" Zamasu asks, eyes not averting from the television.
"Oh, I did while you were in rage mode. It's become the most popular video on Godtube in such a short time. I'm finally a successful Godtuber. And I have you to thank for it, Zamasu." Gowasu says cheerily as he sips his tea. "Everyone's been commenting about how funny they think it is." Gowasu says.
Zamasu then felt such great anger build up inside of him, he wanted to rip Gowasu apart right here, right now for making him the biggest laughingstock of Godtube, which was watched by beings from every universe. Zamasu felt as if he would burst a blood vessel. He calmed himself down with a deep breath and smiled at Gowasu. Zamasu then walked behind Gowasu as he was distracted by Godtube and looked down at him. Gowasu being oblivious to Zamasu standing behind him.
"Excuse me, Gowasu sama, but I'd like to show you this new technique involving tapping shoulders..." Zamasu says as he ignites an energy blade from his hand.
"Tapping should-GRAWGH!" Gowasu started to say before Zamasu suddenly chops him in the shoulder with his energy blade.
The End.