Sanctified

"You know, it's not fair that you became a blonde after you stopped working for me. Think of all the wasted blonde jokes!"

"I'm busy so if you want to bug someone go find Foreman, he still works for you."

He ignored her. "How are you today, Cammy?"

Cameron smirked at her old boss. "Cammy? Is that your attempt at being cute?" He batted his eyes at her innocently, causing her to sigh. "What do you want, House?"

House took a seat on one of the examination tables. "I was wondering where that boy-toy of yours went."

"He told me he had surgery today."

House smirked. "Liar."

"I'm not lying. That's really what he told me." Cameron frowned.

"I'm not calling you a liar. I'm calling him a liar."

"What?" Cameron let her shoulders fall and started walking away as House followed.

"So why would lover-boy want to lie to you?"

"I don't know. Why are you bothering me? I know you don't like Chase but you don't have to –"

"I love Chase. We go way back."

"House!"

"Fine, but I wouldn't have come if I knew you were going to be such a bitch. I just thought you'd like to know what your boyfriend was up to…"

Cameron's eyes widened. "Wait, you know where he is?"

"I may have an inkling."

"Your inklings are always right."

"Is that supposed to be a euphemism? 'Cause I don't get it."

"House, stop stalling."

"Well, Thirteen was talking to Mormon who claimed that Cutthroat Bitch saw Chase get into Wilson's car this morning and the two of them drove off."

Cameron rolled her eyes. "Fine, he's with Wilson. So tell me, what's Wilson doing?"

"I have no idea."

"He didn't tell you? You didn't sneak into his office after-hours and peak at his day planner?"

"He told me he had surgery."

Cameron gaped at House as the older man made a clearly disgruntled exit.

"House!" Cuddy called out.

"No, mommy, I don't want to go to school today!" House complained as Cuddy placed her hand on his arm and stopped him from leaving.

"Where's Wilson?"

"You mean he didn't report to the Dean of Medicine like a good little boy?"

"He told me he had something he had to take care of and I gave him the benefit of the doubt, but it's been two hours already."

"And apparently he kidnapped Chase and took him with him."

"What?"

"Or at least, that's the word on the street."

"So where are they?"

"House doesn't know. And neither do I." Cameron walked up behind them.

Cuddy sighed. "So they both left without a word to either of you? That's strange, even for them. What kind of an emergency is this?"

"You can ask them yourself." House added, motioning toward the door where Chase and Wilson were finally returning.

Cuddy briskly made her way to the two doctors. "Where exactly have the two of you been? Do you really think you can blow off the whole morning without so much as an explanation to me?"

"We're sorry Cuddy, we'll make it up to you in overtime." Wilson apologized.

"Kinky." House commented, earning a glare from Cameron.

"Just what were you doing?" Cuddy asked again.

"Nothing." Wilson replied hesitantly.

"Yeah right." House replied derisively.

"Wilson, we're going to have to tell them sometime." Chase nudged the older doctor.

Wilson blanched slightly. "I'd rather not…"

"Why did you lie to me, Chase?" Cameron asked with the slightest hint of hurt in her voice.

"We had to…we just…" Chase began.

"Oh please, no." Wilson muttered, placing a hand over his face in exasperation.

"We got married."

Cuddy closed her office doors behind her and ushered the doctors inside.

"So, let me get this straight." She shot House a look as he chuckled at her word choice. "You two got married?"

Chase sighed. "Let me explain. I got a call the other day that my work visa was running out. Dad always took care of that…" Everyone save House nodded sympathetically and Chase continued. "The deadline was coming up fast and I didn't know what to do; I had to get permanent citizenship somehow."

"And Wilson was the first floozy you could find?" House interjected cheerfully. "I'm surprised you didn't just go for Cuddy. She obviously has a very open mind and a very big heart. Or maybe that's just an open blouse and big –"

"House, shut up." Cameron cut him off and turned to Chase. "So you just ran off without telling me about any of this and got married?"

"Look, Cameron, can we talk about this?"

"Oh, so now you want to talk?"

House grinned. "Ooh, she's getting feisty. You better not tell her about the honeymoon, Chase. I know Wilson's a real animal in the sack, she'll never be able to stack up."

Cuddy watched her colleagues blush furiously as an awkward silence descended upon them. House was clearly enjoying himself. She raised her arms in frustration.

"Okay, I don't care. You can all do whatever you want and marry whomever you want, as long as it's not on my time, alright? So everyone get out of here and get back to work. I don't want to hear anymore about this for the rest of the day."

Chase could barely look at Cameron as they walked out of the office while House leaned in and commented to Wilson.

"Cuddy's just upset that no one wants to marry her."

"This may just be the best day of my life." House announced joyously, excitedly pacing Wilson's office.

"Good for you, now can you leave me alone so I can actually get some work done? I'm pretty sure Cuddy already wants to castrate me."

"Aw, but Chase would be such a good mommy."

"House…"

"Oh, right, I guess you would be the mom. You are the better cook."

Wilson sighed. "You can see why I didn't tell you about this."

House raised an eyebrow. "Is that the only reason?"

"What do you mean?" Wilson watched as House played with the pens on his desk, refusing to look up.

"You didn't tell me you were getting married to Chase because I'd make fun of you?"

"I didn't tell you I was getting married to Chase because you sabotage all of my relationships."

"I let you get married three times, what makes you think I wouldn't let you be an idiot a fourth time?" House scoffed before pausing. "Wait, this is a relationship? A real relationship?"

Wilson smiled slyly at the shocked look on House's face. "What if it was?"

"You're such a bad liar." House narrowed his eyes at Wilson. "I really do hate you."

House stalked out and Wilson grinned to himself. "No you don't."

"Cameron, just listen for a second."

"I don't even want to look at you right now, Chase."

"Fine, you don't have to look at me, just listen."

Cameron swiftly turned on her foot and crossed her arms over her chest. "Fine. What could possibly have led you to hide something so important from me?"

"I knew if I told you my visa was running out, you'd worry for no reason."

"That's a perfectly valid reason to worry!"

"No, it's not, I had it all under control."

"Chase, you did not have it under control. You married Wilson. Does that not seem just a little bit strange to you?"

"He was the first person I thought of. Besides, he's already been married so many times…"

Cameron looked away, her voice softening a bit. "What about me? Why didn't you think of me? I could have helped you Chase. You just had to ask."

"Cameron." Chase took her hand in his. "I know you're here to help me. It's just that when – I mean if – we get married…I want it to actually mean something."

Cameron glanced at him in shock causing Chase to blush in embarrassment. "Well, um, you know what I mean." He stuttered.

She smiled and pecked him lightly on the lips. "Yes, I think I do."

Chase smiled. "So are we okay now?"

"Not really." Cameron shot him a warning look before grinning. "First I need some cheering up. We're going to milk this marriage for all its worth. Wait till House catches you and Wilson wearing matching wedding bands!"

This fic was written for the Chase Fest challenge on Livejournal. Hopefully you enjoyed it. Such a whack prompt, hahaha! But that's why I took it, I had to. Ohhh, the PPTH gang, so crazy, which is why I love them. :) Please read and review! Thanks!