Okay so I really didn't stab myself in the leg but I needed away to get my story out! And I have changed my name to hayley in this story for reasons...and yea I would like to thank my amazing friend monica for helping me in a way I never new was possible...so I got this idea from monica...and I would like to dedicate this story to her!! Thanks monica...you truly are an amazing person!
MY WORLD
"Why
kind of idiot stabs herself in the leg?"Sam asked
"I'm
not sure...but she won't speak to me so maybe you should try"
Haleh said
"Sure" Sam said grabbing the chart from
Haleh
Sam walked into Curtain 2 and saw a girl no older than 15
sitting in the bed her leg bandged up where she had obviously stab
herself...Sam looked at the chart...Hayley...15 years old
"So
your names Hayley?"
"Who asking?" The girl
said
"Nobody...can you tell me why you did this?"
"Why...so
you can go and tell my parents after i spill?"
"I won't
tell" Sam said lying
"Cause im psycho...so you need to
admit you...lock me up in a mental home away from them!" Hayley
said looking right into Sams eyes
"Whos them?"
"My
parents...i hate them so much"
"Hate a strong word"
"my
feelings for them are strong" hayley said in this
who-are-you-to-tell-me tone
"Drop the attitude" Sam
said
"you don't like it...call 1-800-kiss-my..hayley
started
"hey...thats enough" Sam said
Hayley rolled
her eyes
Sam looked at the girl...black hair...black nail polish,
black eyeliner...obviously she was goth
"Why do you hate your
parents so much?"
"there horrible..."
"why?"
Hayley
stared into sams eyes
"i won't tell anyone" sam said
"Am
i ugly?"
"What...no of course not"
"My best
friend...well my ex best friend thinks so...she said to me one
day...Hayley...your not pretty"
Sam stared at the girl...she
picked at her arm...they were covered in scabs...
"Everyone
says im turning into a goth...that is wrong...that all this make-up
is wrong...that im just asking to be kidnapped by some
stranger...begging for him to beat me up...kill me...rape me...that
its all my fault if that happens"
"Oh god now
Hayley...thats not true" sam said...she could feel the tears
forming in her eyes...Hayley continued to scratch at her
arm...ignoring the blood...
Hayley laughed a mixture between
sadness and happiness
"You know sometimes i do wish i would
be kidnapped...beat up...murdered...raped...maybe i do want to be the
victim...i mean its an easy way out" Hayley said
Sam just
stared at the girl...fifteen years old. Wanted to die, to be
raped...she was fifteen...and thats what she wanted hated her parents
torn up inside...
"You think i mental don't you...that i have
a messed up mind...its okay if you do...most people think so...i've
learned to cope with it" Hayley said
Tears fell out of
Hayleys eyes....but she didn't wipe them...instead she stuck out her
tounge and tried to catch them...there was a silence and sam didn't
know how to break it
"I loved the feeling of the shingles on
my feet after the sun had been shinning on them all day...it was warm
and it felt nice to walk on...i used to go out on the roof quite
often...it would help me to clear my mind...and the breeze was
nice...and i could cry and the noise of the cars and people would
drown out my cries...i was out on my roof one day releasing pain...my
parents werent home...it was a nice summer day...although it was hot
outside i didn't care...i was out of the house in a way...when i saw
them coming up the street i quickly went back inside forgetting to
close the window...and the air condition was on...so my dad saw that
the window was open and asked why i had left it open...there was no
use of lying and saying i didn't since i was the only person
home...so my parents found out about be being on the roof...they
thought i was some psycho...wanting to jump to my death...or sneak
out of the house for some drugs...but i swear i'm not into drugs and
i wouldn't jump to my death...they threathened to lock me in my room
cause the window in my room i couldn't get out...only through my
sisters window...they said the would lock me in there when they are
out so i could never go out on the roof...it was no big deal...i mean
i've been sent to my room and i don't know maybe they did lock the
door...."
sam let the tears fall from her eyes
"they...they
locked you up in your room before?"
"once...or
twice..probably....i really don't care...i probably cried my eyes
out...screamed...but i don't care..."
"what did you do
to deserve this?"
"i guess i wasn't the "child"
they wanted"
"but thats no reason to lock you in your
room"Sam said
Hayley shurged her shoulders as more tears
flowed from her eyes
"i actually wouldn't mind being locked
in a room...cause then i'd be alone...my mom was always worried about
where i was going...i'd say i was going to my friends house or to the
library...and i was...but she never seemed to believe me...she would
send me brother out to look for me to see if i was actually telling
the truth...i told her one day i was going to Charlie's house and
then to the park...but we ended up staying at her house...and when
she sent my brother out looking for me...well he never found me at
the park...so when i came home my mom was yelling at me saying how i
lied to her and that she could never trust me cause i could of been
out doing God knows what...she said she was going to hire somebody to
follow me around so she would know if i actually was going where i
said i was...everynight i cried myself to sleep and shut all my
friends and favourtie teachers out as well as my family...everyone
was my enemy to me...i ate lunch alone...i quit all the
extra-cirruclar activites i was in...floor hockey, volleyball, office
helpers everything...i hurt so many people by doing that but everyone
was my enemy...my grades started slipping and withen 2 weeks one of
my teachers kept a file on me...what i said in class what i said to
him after class...and then he showed my mom...MY MOM...he showed my
mom...what a great solution...and so my mother wanted someone to sit
with me during french and make sure i behaved...that was my moms
answer to everything...lets hire someone to watch her...what a great
solution...give the kid a nervous breakdown who cares as long as she
behaves...we don't want to look like bad parents...i told her i would
behave"
More tears fell down Sam and Hayleys face
"She
was really jealous that i had devolped a special relationship with a
teacher at the school...because i told her that this teacher was more
of a motherly figure than she was...and she didn't want me to see her
anymore...but she couldn't stop that...for gods sake the teacher
worked at the school...but i only saw her after school when leaving
the property because i wasn't allowed to see her at lunch or in the
morning anymore...it hurt so much...and saying bye to her on the last
day of school was one of the hardest things i ever had to do...i
cried for and hour before saying bye and cried when i hugged her...it
felt so good that hug....i hadn't hugged her in so long...and for the
first time in a long time i felt comfort....but i had to leave...and
i promised her on the first day of high school i would get off the
bus and tell come and see her at the elementary school...she said
she'd like that...now i realise that is going to happen...my mom
won't let me...cause she said she was going to pick me up everyday
after school at the bus stop...and take me to the bus stop every
morning" hayley cried burrying her hands in her face
sam
touched her arm...hayley looked up
"am i crazy...can you
admit me?"
sam just stared into this girls eyes...
"didn't
think so" hayley said going back to scratching her arm and
crying...there was a long period of silence....
"What are you
thinking?" Sam asked
"That this is all a waste of
time...telling you my deepest thoughts...i mean your not real...you a
fictional character created for a t.v. show...that writing this story
was a waste of time"
"yes maybe...but writing this story
has helped you get all that off you chest...that burden off your
shoulders...and maybe by writing this you have and will help other
people who feel the same way you do...maybe writing this was the only
way you could release you thoughts without hurting yourself"
"Thank you...for
listening to me...even if you are a fictional character...you've help
me more than you can imagine...and your more than just a made up t.v.
show character" Hayley said
Hayley sat on her bed in her room
finishing up this story on her laptop...it was dark out...she wiped
away the final tears and closed her laptop
"Thank you"
She said and she turned off the light
