13 ways to annoy Draco Malfoy
Call him the bouncing ferret
If you want to be suicidal, or are suicidal, call him Drakie-poo
Take polyjuice potion, turn into Harry Potter, and give him a lap dance in the middle of the great hall. Make sure the real Harry is nowhere in sight
Drop hints to Snape that Draco likes him
Use a permanent sticking charm to stick Pansy Parkinson to him
Tell him that Blaise Zabini wants to have his children
Buy one of Fred and George's edible dark marks, plaster it on your arm, tell him you're a death eater, and then ask him if you can eat his mark too
Join his and Hermione Granger's rooms together.
Announce to the entire school that he sleeps with a pink unicorn. While doing this, produce a tattered one from your cloak
Say "Hi professor Moody" at random times during the day.
During Potions, put a reduced version of an erumpet horn into his potion. If it doesn't explode, make it.
Dye his hair red and gold with a permanent dye while he's sleeping
Change the color of his room and everything in it pink