The Jedi and the Duchess Chapter 1: Prologue, a star wars fanfic

Hello everyone. I am relatively new to fanfiction and writing. I hope you enjoy. This chapter takes place 2 months after the end of The Phantom Menace. This story is written from both Obi-Wan's and Satine's perspective.

Obi-Wan

Obi-Wan sat up with a start his heart racing. Jedi weren't supposed to dream, but that hadn't stopped him from seeing the moments leading to his master's death over and over every time he closed his eyes. The yellow eyes of the Sith still pierced his soul. He could remember the look on the Sith's face as he had killed his master. It had been cold devoid of emotion, of life. He shuttered, trying to push away the anger and guilt. He had been mad at his master during that last mission together. He had not only taken him from Mandalore early, taking him from the arms of Satine. He had replaced him with the slave boy from Tatooine. He had even pleaded with his final breath for Obi-Wan to train the boy. Nothing to comfort his Padawan, only to help the boy. Obi-Wan had always looked up to Qui-Gon as a father, but Qui-Gon had cast him aside like he was nothing.

Satine stirred next to him, pulling the sheets tighter under her chin. Her presence calmed the storm brewing in his soul. When the council had elected to give him two months before he had to begin training Anakin, the first thing he had thought of was Satine. Satine who had saved him as he had hung over the pit. Satine who had brought meaning to his very existence. He had called her; she had been in a meeting. He told her young maid who had answered to record a message. He hadn't been able to say to her why he was coming what had happened. He only told her he was coming. She had sent the coordinates of the summer palace just hours later.

He had landed on the hidden landing pad under the palace as the sunset over the desolate mountains. The blue of the dome was causing the orange sky to appear a reddish brown. She had been waiting for him, a small smile on her lips before she saw him. She must have recognized something was wrong. He knew he looked terrible; he hadn't slept, dark circles rimming his eyes. He had collapsed in her embrace unable to answer her pleas. They had just stood there holding each other. All he had managed to say was that Qui-Gon was dead.

That had been two months ago. He had stayed on Mandalore with his Satine, hiding in the summer palace. He still had been unable to tell her almost anything that had happened. He spent his days trying to meditate, to focus, to prepare to return to the Jedi, to train Anakin. She had spent her days slowly putting her planet back together. It would only be a few days until he would return to the temple, leaving Satine for the last time. He knew he wasn't ready to leave her again. He pulled himself to the end of the bed, running his hands through his auburn hair. It was slowly growing out of the close crop he had worn for years, the braid and ponytail of the Padawan now gone. Killing a Sith had made him a Knight, a Jedi. He remembered as the workers pulled the body of the Sith from the bottom of the pit. His eyes had been lifeless and glassy, his red skin oddly pale. They had also found his lightsaber, banged up but still useable. It now sat on a table at the far end of the room, unused. He had trouble even looking at it. Next to it sat Qui-Gon's lightsaber, the lightsaber he had used to kill the Sith. The council had given it to him, and he didn't want it.

The sun was rising over the distant mountains slowly lighting the sky. The stars were disappearing. The doors of the room were open to the large terrace, that overlooked the gardens. Obi-Wan had spent many a day wandering the gardens, while Satine was about her duties. They had spent their evenings talking, mainly about how to best heal Mandalore. The people of Mandalore had nearly been annihilated during the Civil War, getting Mandalore back would not be easy. Satine had not pressed him about what had happened, knowing if he wanted he would tell her. He knew if he told her everything, he would have to admit to loving her. He would have to say the words.

Her light breathing took him from his thoughts. He watched her sleep. She was peaceful, curled into a ball. She reached out her arm grabbing for him. When she didn't find him, she opened her eyes looking around. She smiled as her eyes rested on him, her golden blonde hair catching the light, still in its braid. She sat up stretching her arms above her head. Her emerald nightgown clung to her curves, its soft silk glittering in the light.

She crawled through the sheets kneeling behind him. She wrapped her arms around him, resting her hands on his bare chest, her head in the crook of his neck. Her arms were cold against the warmth of his chest. She was always cold, and he was always warm. It was just one way they fit each other so well. He took her hands in his needing her to comfort him.

"What's wrong Ben," her voice was still deep with sleep, but it was colored with concern. She had taken to calling him Ben while they were on the run. "We need aliases, so we don't get caught. Obi-Wan sounds too much like a Jedi name." She had laughed. Her laugh had stopped him from arguing.

He kissed her on the forehead, breathing in the sweet smell of lilies. She always smelled of Mandalorian Calla Lilies. It made him weak. "I must return to the temple by the end of the week." He barely whispered, knowing he was lying to her, at least in part.

He looked down at her. A few loose tendrils of hair hung around her face in gentle curls. He knew if he said goodbye he would never see her again. Her green eyes sparkled, sadness swirling behind the surface. He knew her heart would break all over again. It wasn't fair to her, yet he didn't regret coming.

"That isn't all of it is it," she was perceptive and impatient. "There is something you have been carrying since you came here. Tell me, let me help you."

"I can't Satine," his voice was still weak, he could feel the tears he had been holding in for two months approaching, "You have so much already."

"I can't send you back with this. I can't say goodbye knowing you are still in pain. Let me help you."

"You already carry a burden far too large. I will not add to it." He was still unable to look at her.

He felt her shift; she was now sitting next to him, one arm still draped over his shoulder. The other stroking his chin. She tilts his chin forcing him to look at her. "My burdens will never be so big, that I can not help carry yours. You have listened to and carried my burdens since we met. Please allow me to help carry yours. I need to help you." There were tears in the corners of her eyes, filled with empathy and compassion. He could very quickly get lost in her emerald eyes.

"It was my fault," he said the words quickly without thinking, his burden already lighter by saying them.

"What was your fault," she was coaxing him, urging him to tell the story.

"It's my fault Qui-Gon is dead." The words were coming easier now. He could feel some of the weight lifting from his shoulders. "I was clouded, angry, I fell behind, and he died because I wasn't there."

"It isn't your fault, none of what happened is your fault." Her voice was sympathetic comforting.

He shut his eyes trying to stop his tears, "No, I fell, I wasn't focused, I wasn't thinking, and I fell. I couldn't catch up. I watched him die, trapped, helpless. I couldn't help him. I had to watch as he died."

She wrapped her arms around him pulling him closer, his head now resting on her shoulder. "Oh, Ben. Why didn't you tell me sooner?"

With her words he could no longer hold back his tears, "I didn't know how" he barely managed crying into her shoulder pulling her closer. He could feel her fingers slowly, lightly, tracing circles across his back, her soft lips pressed against his temple. Her breath warm and slow. He buried his face deeper in the crook of her neck, breathing in the scent of lilies through his tears. He cried until he felt he had no more tears to cry. The sun now sat above the peaks of the mountains, the morning bright, cloudless.

They just sat in each other's arms. She whispered almost inaudible in his ear, "Tell me everything, my Ben."

He pulled away slightly looking into her eyes. A tear still sat on her cheek. Her carefully wiped it away, pushing a stray hair behind her ear. His fingers traced her braid finding the bottom. He carefully removed it, allowing her hair to hang free. Her hair had grown long in the year they had spent together, she hadn't cut it yet.

"I can't, darling, it isn't fair to you." He was aware of the pain his leaving again would cause he wasn't going to add more. He kissed her forehead, her skin soft and cool.

"Please, let me share this with you. Let me help you." Her eyes gazed into his pleading, "Please" her voice was barely a whisper.

He pressed his forehead to hers. He would do anything for those eyes. He took a breath steadying himself, "Then I must tell you everything, from the beginning."

She nodded silently, urging him to continue.

He pulled her onto his lap, needing her closer. She placed one hand in his hair, searching for the braid that was no longer there, the other rested on his chest, calming his beating heart.

"After leaving you," his heart ached just saying the words, recalling the last moments they had spent together. "Qui Gon informed me we were to head to a rendezvous with another ship. We would travel to Naboo, as diplomatic envoys to try and negotiate a deal between Naboo and the Trade Federation. The Trade Federation had blockaded Naboo trying to force them to pay a higher tax. The Chancellor thought an invasion was imminent so unbeknownst to the Senate he requested the aid of the Jedi. If the negotiations were to fail, we were to remove the queen and return to the Senate to demand intervention."

He watched Satine closely. She had been adamant during the civil war the republic not intervene. The suffering of her people was not yet a distant memory. He knew the plight of Naboo, would bring painful memories. She only nodded for him to continue.

"We arrived at the rendezvous and met the ship that was to take us to the Trade Federation Blockade. This was when everything started to go wrong." He took another breath, kissing her forehead before continuing. "It was a trap. The Trade Federation tried killing us. We managed to escape. We got to the surface on a droid carrier. I told Qui-Gon something was wrong. He didn't listen. He just brushed me aside. He always used to listen, but this time he didn't. He said I was just trying to get back to Mandalore, back to you. He should have listened."

She wiped a tear that had escaped from his eye kissing his cheek, trying to comfort him.

"We found a Gungan who said he could get us to Theed." Just the thought of Jar Jar annoyed Obi-Wan. He was just another pathetic lifeform Qui-Gon found. Was that all Obi-Wan had been to his former master, a pathetic lifeform. "He took us to the Gungan city, but they offered no aid, only a ship to get us to Theed."

Satine had sensed him tense at the mention of Jar Jar and pulled him closer resting her head on his chest.

"We had to go through the Planet's core. Almost got eaten by a huge fish. You would have enjoyed it."

She had always loved to hear stories of his adventures. They had spent many nights sitting together, him telling her of his many adventures across the galaxy. She smiled her fingers running through his hair.

"We managed to find the Queen and a few others being held in the palace and escaped on her personal ship. The Trade Federation managed to damage our hyperdrive as we left. We couldn't make it to Coruscant and had to find somewhere out of Trade Federation control to land. Qui-Gon chose Tatooine."

"What was Tatooine like," she asked, they hadn't made it to Tatooine on their year on the run.

"It was horrible, and thankfully I was tasked to stay on the ship to try and fix it. You can be glad we never went there. I hope never to go back. Qui-Gon went with Jar Jar the Gungan and one of the Queen's Handmaids to Mos Espa to try and find a hyperdrive."

"I don't know of everything that happened. He would contact us when he could. This was when I called you."

"I remember."

"The Queen and her handmaids were nice enough. Sabe even figured out about you" Obi-Wan thought he saw jealousy cross Satine's face for a moment. "You do realize the Queen, and her handmaids are 14 or thereabouts."

She laughed in his chest, "And they weren't you. They only made me miss you more, that's why I called. Qui-Gon met the boy Anakin while trying to bargain for the Hyperdrive. Republic Credits don't work on Tatooine. He saw something in the boy, something he never saw in me. He bet the ship against the Hyperdrive and the boy that Anakin could win a pod race. It was foolish, without a ship we would be stranded. He said the boy was the chosen one. Meant to bring balance to the force. He wanted to train him. He was done with me." He took a breath, trying to forget how he had been cast aside for Anakin. It had only been a few days since Qui-Gon had told him he no longer felt he was ready for his trials, now he had suddenly changed his mind, not because he thought Obi-Wan was ready but because he was done with him.

"Ben" she kissed him softly, comforting him. She disliked his former master even though she had only met him a few times.

"Anakin managed to win. I fixed the Hyperdrive just in time, as we were readying to leave the Sith attacked. He was a species I didn't recognize. His skin was a dark red, covered in thick black markings." Obi-Wan shuttered at the memory, "His eyes I will never forget, they were yellow and filled with nothing."

Satine kissed his neck, her fingers digging into his back.

"Qui Gon managed to escape, and we left for Coruscant."

They sat for a moment just holding each other. Obi-Wan not ready to move on just yet. The next part hurt to remember.

"When we reached Coruscant we left the Queen to report to the temple. I am sure you heard the news about what happened with the Senate."

Satine only nodded.

"Qui-Gon presented Anakin to the council for consideration. They refused to allow him to be trained. Qui-Gon presented me for my trials and asked to train Anakin himself. Only he didn't present me because he thought I was ready, he was done with me. I no longer served his purpose and Anakin did. He just threw me aside. I knew I wasn't ready. I knew Qui-Gon was right about me not being ready. I was instructed to leave the room, and Qui-Gon debated with the rest of the council. I don't know what he said, but they accepted that he could teach Anakin and I would take my trials when the mission was complete."

Satine kissed him again, "I'm sure he thought you were ready."

Before Obi-Wan could answer the door to the suite slowly opened, revealing Satine's young maid, Sakarah.

"Your Grace," she bowed quickly, her face going red, "It is time to prepare for today's council meeting."

Satine answered without hesitation, "Tell the council I have woken with a headache and will be unable to meet today. We will meet tomorrow."

Sakarah nodded and quickly left the room. The door closing softly behind her. Obi-Wan turned to Satine, "You mustn't let the council wait," he said brushing a strand of hair from her face. He knew her place as leader of Mandalore was not yet stable, her canceling a council meeting was unwise.

"My council can wait, we have nothing pressing to discuss that cannot wait until tomorrow. We met only yesterday." She was lightly resting a hand on his cheek. "I have yet to miss a council meeting. They will likely enjoy their day of freedom. Right now, I am here for you. You never abandoned me. I don't plan on abandoning you."

He kissed her lightly at first, pulling her closer. Her arms wrapped tightly around his neck pulling her closer. Her silk nightgown is cold against his bare chest. He cupped her face with his hand guiding her kiss. He broke the kiss only momentarily before kissing her again, deeper, willing her to ask him to stay. Wanting her to say the word. When they broke apart one of her arms slipped from his neck as she rested her hand on his chest, his heart beating fiercely. Her gaze penetrated his soul as he rested his forehead against hers.

"Why did you leave Coruscant." She asked almost silently, her breath labored.

"The Queen begged to leave. The Senate was taking too long. We asked her to stay behind while we went to free her people but she wouldn't listen. She reminded me a lot of you. How you begged me to return you. I think you would make great friends."

She laughed as he kissed her forehead.

"We returned under cover of darkness. Conditions were worse than we had thought. The entire population of the planet was being kept in work camps, starving. They would be unable to assist us. The Queen's personal guard was able to free a few more guards and a handful of pilots to help, but it wouldn't be enough." He noticed Satine's distress. It had only been a few months since her planet had found peace, they had suffered worse. He kissed her forehead again wiping the tear rolling down her cheek. "The queen's handmaid Padmae, the one who traveled to Mos Espa, suggested a plan. We would ask the Gungan's for help. Jar Jar tried the city, but it was abandoned. We found then in the swamps hiding from the Trade Federation. The idea was to implore the Gungan army to distract the Trade Federation while we slipped into the capital. The pilots would try and destroy the blockade while we kidnaped the Viceroy to force an end to the occupation."

Satine cut in, "Padmae is the Queen isn't she."

Obi-Wan smiled, "Yes, how did you know." He hadn't been able to figure it out, though he assumed Qui-Gon had.

"Well, she insisted on going into Tatooine, and she suggested the battle plan. It is also well known that Naboo uses decoy's to protect their queen. It has the advantage of allowing the Queen to do things she would otherwise be unable to do, like going into Mos Espa."

Obi-Wan kissed her lightly. She always surprised him. "She revealed herself to convince the Gungan's to help." Satine smiled taking his hand in her own, rubbing slow circles with her thumb as if she knew what was coming. "We made it into the city, but I could feel something was wrong, again Qui-Gon just brushed me aside. The pilots with Anakin managed to get the fighters and leave for the blockade." He shuttered remembering the yellow eyes closing his own, trying to will the last of his guilt away.

"The Sith," she whispered, squeezing his hand. The other still resting on his chest. Concern and fear were coloring her perfect features. Her eyes were darkening.

"Yes," his voice was almost inaudible as he struggled to continue his story. "The queen and the others went ahead. We would deal with the Sith." He continued to struggle, what would she think of him knowing how bad he had failed. "He was a fierce fighter, and my judgment was clouded with my resentment toward Qui-Gon. He fought us easily pushing us deeper and deeper into the palace. The walkways were narrow. It was a long way to fall. I fought, but I couldn't keep up. He was too strong. He managed to catch me off guard kicking me off the walkway. I fell hard barely able to hold on several levels below." His chest was shaking with emotion. Satine wrapped her arms around his neck burying her face in his shoulder. Her heart beat quick against his chest calming him. "I couldn't pull myself. I just hung there as they got further and further away. I let that monster separate us." Obi-Wan was more angry with himself than the Sith. "I couldn't catch up. A force field came up separating us. I was angry. It was clouding me." He could feel her crying into his shoulder. He pulled her closer, "The force fields dropped, but I couldn't make it to them before they closed again. Qui-Gon was fighting him. It was a blur. The Sith distracted him, and he was gone. Rage colored my vision. I was screaming, but my voice sounded distant. The force field dropped, and I flew at him. I was no match for him though, not alone. I managed to damage his lightsaber, but it wasn't enough." His emotion was flowing now he couldn't stop his retelling not now, " He pushed me into the pit in the middle of the room. I managed to grab a pipe my lightsaber clattering to the bottom. I could feel Qui-Gon slipping away." Her fingers were digging into his back as her tears ran down his chest. "I was hanging there, no weapon. I forced myself to focus. To focus on anything to calm me, anything to allow me to think. I thought of you. I thought of your smile, the way your hair seems to sparkle in the sun. The way one look from you can melt my soul. I had to see you again. I had to hold you again. I couldn't die without telling you I loved you." His words just poured out. He had to tell her how he felt. He wasn't sure he would ever get the chance again.

She looked up at him, tears staining her face. She smiled a little. Her mouth opened to speak but he was kissing her. He had to kiss her. He kissed her hard and passionately. All the emotion he had felt he poured into the kiss. It was sloppy, clumsy but he didn't care. She was kissing him back, her hand searching his back. His hands were clasping at her nightgown, crinkling the delicate fabric beneath his rough hands.

As her lips left him, their breath heavy, he whispered, "I love you Satine." Kissing her cheek, "I love you Satine." Kissing her forehead, "I love you Satine." Kissing her jaw, "I love you Satine." Kissing her neck, "I love you Satine." He was kissing her again, his heart leaping in his chest. They slowly broke the kiss, both breathless.

"Oh, Ben," Satine whispered, "I have waited so long for you to say that." She paused looking into his eyes for only a moment before closing her own, "I love you Obi-Wan Kenobi." Her words were soft gentle. She rested her hand on his chest as he rested his forehead against hers. They were startled by a sharp knock on the door and Sakarah entering quickly looking flustered.

"Prime Minister Almec is here," said the girl quickly, out of breath, "He demands to see you." The girl kept her eyes averted from the couple.

Obi-Wan looked at Satine and nodded. They didn't need the Prime Minister barging in finding him there. "Tell him I will be a minute," Satine responded, "Ask him if he would like something while he waits."

The maid nodded and left the room.

"I am sorry Obi-Wan," she said kissing him lightly, "I must not leave him waiting long."

She rose from his lap, brushing his cheek before heading into the dressing room. She emerged a few minutes later dressed in a simple purple shirt and black pants, pulling on a grey vest. Her eyes were puffy and red from her tears. She ran a brush through her curly hair before braiding it quickly. It glittered in the late morning sun. A few strands hung lose framing her face. She opened the door smiling at Obi-Wan before disappearing down the hall, the door closing quietly behind her.

He looked down at himself. His bare chest shone from her tears. His thin black pants rumpled. He rose slowly crossing the room. His blue robe hung on the wall. He pulled it on walking onto the terrace. He looked out at the mountains, the dome glittering in the sun. The planet was slowly rebounding, but it would be years maybe even a decade or two before the domes could be removed. He ran his hands through his hair wanting Satine in his arms. He took a breath clearing his mind ease dropping on the conversation between Satine and her Prime Minister.

"What do I owe this pleasure," said Satine her voice clear and sweet in his head, but he could hear her annoyance.

"Duchess you can't just dec.."Almec paused his voice deep and gruff, "Duchess are you ok."

"No, I just enjoy skipping meetings." She had sarcasm and venom dripping from her voice.

"Is it the nightmares again," Almec sounded concerned.

Obi-Wan had remembered her nightmares from the year he had protected her. "Yes, though they are few and far between now." She lied skillfully. No one could know Obi-Wan was there. "I am tired and not feeling well, what did you want. Or are you only here to scold me," Satine had sharpness in her voice.

"I wanted to discuss something with you in private before presenting it to the council." Almec's voice was slow and practiced.

"Yes," Obi-Wan could hear Satine's patience running thin.

"I was hoping to discuss your marriage," his voice remained calm.

Satine coughed, she must have been drinking something. "My marriage, I'm afraid I don't understand."

"Marriage of heads of state can be beneficial for the well-being of the planet." Almec continued, it sounded well-rehearsed. "As I am sure you are aware, the planet is still restless."

Her voice was now razor sharp and filled with anger. Obi-Wan did not envy the Prime Minister. "I am well aware of that."

"Of Course. Your marriage could calm them, give them a strong male leader." Obi-Wan noticed he stressed male. Anger flashed in his mind, Satine didn't need a man by her side to lead.

Her anger was palpable in his mind. He could feel her holding it back. "I suppose you already have someone in mind." She spat the words daring the Prime Minister to continue.

He continued, toward his death Obi-Wan thought. "In fact, I do." He paused for a moment, "Pre Vizsla."

Satine's anger exploded in his mind, scaring Obi-Wan a bit. The Prime Minister was about to be chewed up and spit out. Obi-Wan wouldn't be surprised if he left here free of a job. "Vizsla," her voice was harsh as she spat every word, "Who the Death Watch wanted to usurp me with."

The Prime Minister made the mistake of interrupting her, "We know he wasn't complicit." His voice was quick, almost as if he had recognized his error.

"No, you can speak when I say. To give my enemies what they wanted to calm your nerves. To suggest I can't lead my people without the help of a man. That I am weak. You are out of line Prime Minister. Would you suggest the Queen of Naboo couldn't lead without a man? That Bail Organa lead instead of Breha. You wouldn't dare. Why am I any different. I was born to lead this planet. My entire life was dedicated to making sure I could lead this people. I will not stand in the shadows, a side piece to a man. Expected only to smile, wave and host dinner parties. I will not be used as a pawn to create an heir. In case you haven't forgotten, this is my throne." Her words came out fast and hard, cutting the Prime Minister to shreds. "If I marry, IF, I will choose my husband. I will choose him because I love him, and he respects me enough to allow me to lead. May I remind you, you only have your position because my father trusted you. If you lose my trust, I can easily take your power away. Oh, and one more thing. Isn't governance of a whole moon enough for Pre and his supporters." She ended her speech with knives, taking a moment to continue. Her words were softer but still designed to sting, "Is there anything else you wished to discuss or was your only intention of coming here to insult my ability to lead my people."

"Well, there is the subject of rationing as well," Almec said, and then he started to drone on about rationing.

Obi-Wan stopped ease dropping. They had talked of rationing frequently in the two months he had been there. He didn't need to listen in. He allowed his mind to wander over the conversation, to reflect on his feelings. He tried to think of Satine married. Once he left, no if he left, she would eventually move on. He knew she would. She may even love someone else. Did he want her to love someone else? He knew his heart would always be irrevocably hers. Nothing could remover her. He thought of how she had described a future husband. He would gladly stand beside her in the shadows, only a side piece. He tried to look into his future, to see where it would lead, but all he could see was her. Was he distracted, or was there another reason he only saw her. The more he thought of Satine married, the more he realized it had to be him. He had to be by her side, but more he needed her by his side. The more he thought, the more he realized he no longer wanted to be a Jedi. He would give up everything for her because compared to her everything became nothing. She had become his whole world, his entire life. She no longer needed to ask him to leave the Jedi Order. All she needed to do was accept him, accept his love. He would never leave her side again.

Satine

Satine had been surprised when she left her meeting, a message from Obi-Wan waiting for her. He had called her a week previous. She wasn't expecting to hear from him that soon. The message had been brief. He had been given some time and was on his way. She had Sakarah transmit the coordinates for the Summer Palaces landing pad and made her excuses to the council for leaving early. Something about an urgent diplomatic call. She had waited for 2 hours on the small platform. She wanted to be there when he arrived. She saw the small Jedi fighter enter the dome, a smile filling her face. The two weeks he had been gone had been a torment. To have him back, even if only for a minute made her heart soar.

He landed the fighter and jumped out. Her smile faded when she saw him. He looked terrible, his robes were wrinkled and disheveled. He had dark circles rimming bloodshot eyes. There was also something she couldn't place, something was horribly wrong. She ran to him pulling him into an embrace. He collapsed in her arms. She went to play with his braid, she loved that braid, it was gone. So was his ponytail. Something had happened, he was a Jedi Knight now not just a Padawan. He was shaking in her arms. She only held him tighter.

"What is wrong Ben," she had whispered over and over.

He had finally answered, "Qui-Gon is dead" his voice was barely a breath.

In the two months, he had been there she hadn't gotten much else from him. He refused to talk, and she had stopped asking. She knew that while on their mission they were attacked by a Sith. Obi-Wan had managed to kill him, but not before Qui-Gon had been killed. She knew that Qui-Gon had found a young boy who was force sensitive and now Obi-Wan was set to train him. She also knew that killing a Sith apparently makes you an automatic Jedi Knight.

Satine rolled over reaching for Ben. All her arms found was an empty bed. She opened her eyes looking around. He was sitting on the edge of the bed watching her. She sat up stretching before moving to get closer. She knew he would be leaving soon, she wasn't going to waste their last few days together. She also knew she needed to know what had happened on that mission to Naboo. She wrapped her arms around his chest, his skin warm against hers.

"What's wrong Ben," she was worried about him, he held the weight of the world on his shoulders.

She felt his lips press against her forehead, she breathed deeply. He smelled of cedar wood and old books. She loved his scent. "I must return to the temple by the end of the week." He had barely whispered. Her heart broke just a little at his words. She wasn't ready for him to leave.

Getting him to talk was going to take some coaxing, "That isn't all of it," she paused, "there is something you have been carrying since you came here. Tell me, let me help you."

She felt him tense his voice was weak, he wasn't looking at her. "I can't Satine, you have so much already."

She needed him to let her help him. He had helped her through everything, "I can't send you back with this. I can't say goodbye knowing you are still in pain. Let me help you." Her heart was breaking little by little for him. He was too kind for this world.

He still wasn't looking at her, "You already carry a burden far too large, I will not add to it."

Poppycock she thought. She moved to sit next to him their thighs pressed against each other. There was a time this much contact would have made Obi-Wan blush, but not anymore. She took his chin gently in her hand forcing him to look at her. She knew if he looked at her he just might tell her everything. "My burdens will never be so big, that I cannot help carry yours. You have listened to and carried my burdens since we met. Please allow me to help carry yours. I need to help you." She was fighting back her tears gazing at him pleading.

"It was my fault," his words came quickly, she noticed his countenance lighten but only a little.

"What was your fault," she needed to get him talking.

"It's my fault Qui-Gon is dead." His words were soft, filled with guilt. "I was clouded, angry, I fell behind, and he died because I wasn't there."

She listened to his words in disbelief. It couldn't be his fault. "It isn't your fault, none of what happened is your fault." She needed him to know that it wasn't his fault no matter what he thought. He wasn't the one who killed Qui-Gon.

He had shut his eyes, she could see the tears forming. "No, I fell, I wasn't focused, I wasn't thinking, and I fell. I couldn't catch up. I watched him die, trapped, helpless. I couldn't help him. I had to watch as he died."

She pulled him into a tight embrace, he rested his head on her shoulder. She fought back her own tears. She had never liked Qui-Gon but knew the pain of watching a father die with nothing you could do about it. "Oh, Ben. Why didn't you tell me sooner?"

"I didn't know how" he managed through his tears. The Jedi spent so much time teaching detachment from emotion, they never taught what to do when the emotion was too much. To feel emotion was natural yet the Jedi hid from them. Her year with Obi-Wan had taught her as much. He was too kind to be a Jedi. She didn't want the world to take away his kindness. She cried with him placing her lips to his temple slowly tracing circles on his back like he had so often done for her. She watched as the sun slowly rose higher in the sky. She knew it was almost time for her meetings, she would cancel them. Today she was there for Ben and only Ben.

They just sat, as Obi-Wan slowly stopped crying. She whispered in his ear once his tears had stopped, "Tell me everything, my Ben." Yes, her Ben. He would always be her Ben.

He moved slightly looking up at her. His hand gently wiping a tear from her cheek. He traced her braid with his fingers slowly removing it allowing her long hair to hang loose. "I can't, darling, it isn't fair to you." He kissed her forehead. She loved when he called her darling.

"Please, let me share this with you. Let me help you," she was begging now, "please." Her voice was barely a whisper as she ended her plea.

He pressed his forehead to hers, taking a long shaky breath, "Then I must tell you everything, from the beginning."

She could only nod, encouraging him to continue.

He skillfully pulled her onto his lap. She relished the closeness. She placed a hand in his hair wanting to twirl his braid only to remember once again that it no longer existed. She rested the other on his chest, feeling his heart pounding.

"After leaving you" the memories of their last moments only a few months ago, came flooding back. "Qui-Gon informed me we were to head to a rendezvous with another ship. We would travel to Naboo, as diplomatic envoys to try and negotiate a deal between Naboo and the Trade Federation." She had heard about the occupation of Naboo. "The Trade Federation had blockaded Naboo trying to force them to pay a higher tax. The Chancellor thought invasion was imminent so unbeknownst to the Senate he requested the aid of the Jedi." She shuttered as she remembered how her people had suffered during the civil war if she had understood correctly Naboo had suffered as well. "If the negotiations were to fail, we were to remove the Queen and return to the Senate to demand intervention."

She could tell he was watching her. She had looked away to hide her pain. She needed him to continue. She turned and nodded.

He continued. "We arrived at the rendezvous and met the ship that was to take us to the Trade Federation blockade. This was when everything started to go wrong." He paused breathing hard. Kissing her forehead. She knew enough to know the negotiations were going to fail, "It was a trap. The Trade Federation tried killing us, we managed to escape. We got to the surface on a droid carrier. I told Qui-Gon something was wrong. He didn't listen, he just brushed me aside. He always used to listen, but this time he didn't. He said I was just trying to get back to Mandalore, back to you. He should have listened."

He had been punished by his master because of her. She wiped a tear away from his cheek, kissing his cheek. She needed to comfort him.

"We found a Gungan who said he could get us to Theed." She could tell mentioning the Gungan annoyed Obi-Wan. She remembered Obi-Wan tell her how his master was always collecting creatures and lifeforms expecting Obi-Wan to take care of them. "He took us to the Gungan city, but they offered no aid, only a ship to get us to Theed."

She pulled him closer and rested her head on his chest, listening to his steady heartbeat.

"We had to go through the planet's core. Almost got eaten by a huge fish. You would have enjoyed it."

She loved his stories. She smiled running her fingers through his hair.

"We managed to find the Queen and a few others being held in the palace and escaped on her personal ship." Hearing him talk of the queen, who was supposed to be very beautiful, made her jealous. Did Obi-Wan have a type? Did he fall for every young politician in distress? "The Trade Federation managed to damage our hyperdrive as we left. We couldn't make it to Coruscant and had to find somewhere out of Trade Federation control to land. Qui-Gon chose Tatooine."

"What was Tatooine like," she wanted to know, that was one place he hadn't taken her.

"it was horrible, thankfully I was tasked to stay on the ship to try and fix it. You can be glad we never went there." She laughed a little, "I hope I never go back. Qui-Gon went with Jar Jar, the Gungan, and one of the Queen's handmaids to Mos Espa to try and find a new hyperdrive. I don't know everything that happened. Qui-Gon contacted us when he could. This was when I called you."

"I remember." She did, she had just gotten out of a meeting when Sakarah came running saying she had an urgent call. Satine had been shocked to see Obi-Wan on the other end. They had only been able to speak for a minute, but she had enjoyed every moment. Her heartbreaking just a little when the call was over.

"The Queen and her handmaids were nice enough. Sabe even figured out about you." Jealousy flashed again. Obi-Wan was extremely attractive and had been left alone with a whole group of women.

He cut off her thoughts. "You do realize the Queen, and her handmaids are 14 or thereabout." She could only laugh. Of course, they hadn't tempted Obi-Wan, he loved her. "And they weren't you. They only made me miss you more, that's why I called."

"Qui-Gon met the boy Anakin while trying to barter for the hyperdrive. Republic Credits don't work on Tatooine. He saw something in the boy, something he never saw in me." Satine's heart broke at his words. She hated how Qui-Gon had treated his Padawan. "He bet the ship against the hyperdrive and the boy. He bet Anakin could win the pod race. It was foolish, without a ship we would be stranded. He said the boy was the chosen one. Meant to bring Balance to the force. He wanted to train him. He was done with me." Satine could feel his anger.

"Ben," she kissed him softly, trying her best to comfort him. If Qui-Gon were still alive, she would slap him. She may be a pacifist but he deserved it.

"Anakin managed to win. I fixed the Hyperdrive just in time. As we were ready to leave the Sith attacked. He was a species I didn't recognize. His skin was dark red, covered in thick black markings." She felt Obi-Wan shutter, "His eyes I will never forget, they were yellow and filled with nothing."

Satine held him tighter kissing his neck.

"Qui-Gon managed to escape, and we left for Coruscant."

She just held him, waiting till he was ready to continue. His heart still beating against her chest.

"When we reached Coruscant we left the Queen to report at the temple. I am sure you heard the news about what happened with the Senate."

Satine could only nod. The Queen had used a vote of no confidence to remove the Chancellor.

Satine hated how he doubted himself. He was the perfect Jedi. She kissed him, "I'm sure he thought you were ready."

Before he could speak again, the door opened. In came Sakarah, Satine's maid. She was the only other person who knew Obi-Wan was there. She was staring at the floor, her face bright red. "Your Grace," her voice was timid, "It is time to prepare for today's council meeting."

Satine didn't hesitate, this was Ben's day. "Tell the council I have woken with a headache and will be unable to meet today. We will meet tomorrow."

Sakarah nodded and left. The door closing quietly behind her.

"You mustn't let the council wait," he was brushing a loose strand of hair from her face. She hated that he felt he must always come second. She wanted him to know he could come to her for anything and at any time. If that were the only way she ever saw or heard from him again, that would be enough.

"My council can wait, we have nothing pressing to discuss that cannot wait till tomorrow. We met only yesterday." Her words were matter of fact, her highest priority that day was him. "I have yet to miss a council meeting, they will likely enjoy their day of freedom. Right now, I am here for you. You have never abandoned me, I don't plan on abandoning you."

He was kissing her lightly at first pulling her closer. She wrapped her arms around his neck, getting even closer. He was guiding her kisses, she allowed him too. He broke away but only for a moment. He was kissing her deeper. This kiss was different. She could sense something was different. When they separated she dropped her hand to his chest to steady herself. He rested his forehead on hers, and she gazed into his eyes, seeing some of the pain gone.

"Why did you leave Coruscant." Her voice was quiet still breathless from the kiss.

Satine couldn't help laughing as he kissed her forehead. She had been so stubborn, but he hadn't relented. He had promised her father to keep her safe.

"We returned under cover of darkness. Conditions were worse than we had thought. The entire population of the planet was being kept in work camps, starving." Satine's heart ached, tears coming to her eyes. The plight of the people of Naboo was not that different from her own people. "They would be unable to assist us. The Queen's personal guard was able to free a few more guards and a handful of pilots to help, but it wouldn't be enough." He kissed her forehead wiping her tears.

"The Queen's handmaid Padmae, the one who traveled to Mos Espa, suggested a plan. We would ask the Gungan's for help. Jar Jar tried the city, but it was abandoned. We found them in the swamps hiding from the Trade Federation. The idea was to implore the Gungan army to distract the Trade Federation while we slipped into the capital. The pilots would try and destroy the blockade while we kidnapped the Viceroy to force an end to the occupation."

Satine laughed a little as she realized, "Padmae is the Queen isn't she."

Obi-Wan smiled down at her, "Yes, how did you know." He looked impressed

"Well, she insisted on going into Tatooine, and she suggested the battle plan. It is also well known that Naboo uses decoys to protect their Queen. It has the advantage of allowing the Queen to do things she would otherwise be unable to do, like going into Mos Espa."

Obi-Wan kissed her before continuing. "She revealed herself to convince the Gungan's to help." Satine smiled taking his hand in hers. She knew what was about to come. She had heard the news, the rumors, she just hadn't realized it had been Obi-Wan. She slowly drew circles with her thumb

"We made it into the city, but I could feel something was wrong, again Qui-Gon brushed me aside. The pilots and Anakin managed to get the fighters and leave for the blockade." He shuttered. She sat just a little closer.

"The Sith," she could only whisper knowing what was coming next. She squeezed his hand the other still resting on his chest. She could see the fear in his eyes. Not unlike the fear she had seen in his eyes on Scarif.

"Yes," she could barely hear his reply, he was struggling to speak, "The Queen and the others went ahead, we would deal with the Sith." He was still struggling, the look of guilt intensifying. "He was a fierce fighter, and my judgment was clouded with my resentment toward Qui-Gon. He fought us easily pushing us deeper into the palace. The walkways were narrow, it was a long way to fall. I fought, but I couldn't keep up. He was too strong. He managed to catch me off guard kicking me off the walkway. I fell hard barely able to hold on several levels below." Satine had begun to cry burying her head in the crook of his neck wrapping her arms around him. Her fingers flexing in fear. She could hear his anger and his pain.

"I couldn't pull myself, I just hung there as they got further away. I let monster separate us. I couldn't catch up. A force field came up separating us. I was angry, it was clouding me." His words were faster now, she was still crying on his shoulder. She had almost lost him. She could have lost him.

"The force fields dropped, but I couldn't make it to them before it closed again. Qui-Gon was fighting him, it was a blur. The Sith distracted him, and he was gone." Satine cried harder.

"Rage colored my vision. I was screaming, but my voice sounded distant. The forcefield dropped, and I flew at him. I was no match for him though, not alone. I managed to damage his lightsaber, but it wasn't enough." She pulled him tighter, "He pushed me into the pit in the middle of the room. I managed to grab a pipe my lightsaber clattering to the bottom. I could feel Qui-Gon slipping away. I was hanging there no weapon. I forced myself to focus. To focus on anything to calm me, anything to allow me to think. I thought of you."

Satine's heart skipped a beat, he had thought of her. "I thought of your smile, the way your hair seems to sparkle in the sun. The way one look from you can melt my soul. I had to see you again, I had to hold you again. I couldn't die without telling you I loved you."

She looked up surprised. He loved her, he had said it. She smiled a little about to tell him the same, but he was kissing her. She could feel all his emotions as he pulled her closer. His hands grasping at her nightgown. Her hands searched his back memorizing every moment. It was passionate and messy. She didn't care Obi-Wan Kenobi had said he loved her.

Her lips left his, her breath heavy and labored. He was whispering in her ear, "I love you Satine." He kissed her cheek softly causing her heart to race. "I love you Satine." He was kissing her forehead now, her heart stopped beating. "I love you Satine." He was kissing her jaw, her mind going cloudy. "I love you Satine." Kissing her neck, a small moan escaping her lips. "I love you Satine" he was kissing her again, and she could no longer remember her own name. Her heart doing flips in her chest. He slowly pulled away, and she could barely remember how to breathe.

"Oh, Ben" she managed, slowly regaining conscientious. "I have waited so long for you to say that. " she paused, but only for a moment, closing her eyes, "I love you Obi-Wan Kenobi." She rested her hand on his bare chest, her breathing still labored. His forehead was pressed against hers. She was just about to kiss him again when a sharp knock on the door startled her.

Sakarah entered quickly keeping her eyes down. Her face was flushed, she was flustered. "Prime Minister Almec is here. He demands to see you." She was out of breath.

Satine looked at Obi-Wan who just nodded. She was going to have to leave. The last thing she wanted was the Prime Minister to find her in the arms of her Jedi. "Tell him I will be a minute, ask him if he would like something while he waits."

Sakarah left, and Satine turned back to Obi-Wan, "I'm sorry Obi-Wan," she kissed him lightly wanting more, "I must not leave him waiting long."

She rose from his lap, instantly missing him. She brushed his cheek needing him. She headed into her dressing room finding a simple outfit. She pulled off her nightgown, a mess of tears and wrinkles. She found a bra, the laceyist one she had, black fastening it behind her. She buttoned up the purple shirt all the way to the collar. She could unbutton a few when she returned. She pulled on the matching panties then her black pants. They were tight hugging every curve. She grabbed a grey vest before leaving the room. Obi-Wan was still sitting on the bed. He smiled at her watching as she pulled on the vest. She could feel his gaze as she brushed her hair and braided it. She purposely left a few stands loose knowing how he liked it. She saw her eyes were puffy and bloodshot, it would help make her illness believable. She opened the door smiling at Obi-Wan before she left allowing it the close softly behind her.

Satine walked through the quiet halls of the summer palace. Obi-Wan's words still echoing in her head. He loved her. She had always known it, but hearing it had made her heart soar. Obi-Wan Kenobi not only loved her but loved her enough to defy the code to tell her.

She pushed the door to the parlor open, Prime Minister Almec was seated under the window. He stood offering a small bow before retaking his seat. His presence annoyed her. What was so important that he felt the need to interrupt her. Surely she could miss one day. She took a seat across from him, allowing herself to sink into the plush cushions. She would need to sell her supposed illness, no one could know Obi-Wan was there. Sakarah handed her a cup of tea before leaving the room. She had left a tray filled with various fruits and cheese in the middle of the room.

"What do I owe this pleasure," she allowed her annoyance to fill her voice. A small scowl on her face.

"Duchess, you can't get just dec.." Almec stopped actually looking at her, "Duchess, are you ok."

"No, I just enjoy skipping meetings," her sarcasm dripping with venom. She had better things to be doing, thinking of the young Jedi in the other room.

"Is it the nightmares again," Almec asked more concerned.

She shuttered at the memory of the nightmares. She hadn't had any in the 2 months Obi-Wan had been there. "Yes," she lied, "though they are few and far between. I am tired and not feeling well. What did you want, or are you only here to scold me."

"I wanted to discuss something with you in private before presenting it to the council." His answer was well rehearsed. If he was nervous, his countenance didn't show it.

"Yes," she urged him on, taking a sip of her tea.

"I was hoping to discuss your marriage," his voice calm and measured.

She choked on her tea almost spitting it across the room. "My marriage, I'm afraid I don't understand." He may have been her father's trusted advisor, but he was out of line.

He continued his rehearsed response, "Marriage of heads of state can be very beneficial for the well-being of the planet. As I am sure you are aware, the planet is still restless."

"I am well aware of that." She bit back her anger, how dare he suggest she was out of touch with her people. She allowed him to finish.

"Of course. Your marriage could calm them, give them a strong male leader." He paused looking at her for a response.

She was about to explode at him but stopped herself. "I suppose you already have someone in mind." She spat the words, her temper rising.

"In fact I do." He took a sip of tea before continuing, "Pre Vizsla."

That was the last straw, she exploded at the Prime Minister. If looks could kill, he would be dead, "Vizsla" the words a knife on her tongue. She stood squaring her shoulders not looking away from the Prime Minister. "Who the Death Watch wanted to usurp me."

"We know he wasn't complicit," Almec added quickly

"No, you can speak when I say," she glared, he shrunk into his seat. "To give my enemies what they wanted just to calm your nerves. To suggest I can't lead my people without a man. That I am weak. You are out of line Prime Minister. Would you suggest the Queen of Naboo couldn't lead without a man. That Bail Organa should lead instead of Breha. You wouldn't dare. Why am I any different. I was born to lead this planet. My entire life was dedicated to making sure I could lead this people. I will not stand in the shadows, a side piece to a man. Expected only to smile, wave and host dinner parties. I will not be used as a pawn to create an heir. In case you have forgotten this is my throne. If I marry, If, I will choose my husband. I will choose him because I love him, and he respects me enough to allow me to lead. May I remind you, you only have this position because my father trusted you. If you lose my trust I can easily take your power away. Oh, and one more thing. Isn't governance of a whole moon enough for Pre and his supporters." She spat the last words before taking a breath. She sunk back into her chair exhausted. "Is there anything else you wish to discuss, or was your only intention in coming here to insult my ability to lead my people." She had lost some of her fire but made sure her words still stung.

"Well there is the subject of rationing," his voice was weaker less sure. If she had to hazard a guess, he was just trying to save face.

She nodded for him to continue, but quickly tuned him out. He could drone on for hours without stopping. Her mind wandered to the Jedi sitting in her room. She smiled as she remembered his words. "I love you Satine," he had said them gently, almost reverently as he had kissed her. He had said them over and over again. She closed her eyes seeing his eyes. They were still shining from his tears. The storm that had been brewing behind his baby blue eyes the past two months all but gone. She wasn't ready for him to leave, not now. She remembered her conversation with the Prime Minister. Her married to Pre the idea was preposterous. They hated each other. She wouldn't just marry because it was convenient. She wouldn't marry at all, not if she couldn't marry Obi-Wan. She knew he wanted her to move on, to learn to live her life without him but she couldn't. She needed him with her. The two months he had been there had been bliss. He was no longer her Jedi protector, he was just her Ben. Her Ben, even thinking it made her heart flutter. What would it be like to have him next to her, if he never left. She imagined waking up every morning with him at her side. Listening to his stories as she drifted to sleep in his arms. The more she allowed herself to imagine to more her heart ached for it. She needed him to stay. The two weeks they had been parted had been an absolute hell. She had cried herself to sleep wrapped in his robe. She knew she wanted him to stay, she wanted to ask him to leave the order. But could she, was that fair, to ask him to give up everything for her. But wasn't that what he was risking just being there with her. If anyone found out he would be expelled from the Jedi order. Did he want her to ask him. She thought back to the morning. Had he been asking with every kiss, with every touch. He had said he loved her, he had said it. She wanted to ask him, No, she needed to ask him. Yes, she needed him. She needed him at her side, giving her the strength she didn't have. She was going to ask him and she needed to ask him now.

I hope you liked it. Near the end of the story, I will write out the actual events of The Phantom Menace, with the changes. I appreciate any and all feedback. I will try and update every friday.