FLCL belongs to... I think it's Gianax, I'm not sure.

Don't expect this to be updated often.

Chapter 1 - Nothing Ever Happens In This Town

It's been two years since Medical Mechanical started to invade.

Two years, six months, and seven days.

Which makes it Sunday.

Sunday. It used to be the 'day of rest' for some a certian religion.

Now, it's the day of 'eternal rest'.

The day of death.

The aliens have some kind of massive gun that takes a whole week to reload. They shoot it from outer-space and they're good at protecting it, so there really isn't much anyone can do about it.

But the worst part?

The absolutely totally worst part of it?

It was a machine gun.

It sprayed all over the world, every week, and it was totally random. Every week we played a roulette of death. Is my town going to get shot? Is that one? Some people, like me and my mother, became drifters. Running from town to town looking to escape a fate that we could not see.

Running away from a monster we could not understand.

And finally we came to this town. It was small and pretty useless so on the off chance that there was some form of targeting that they did, it didn't seem likely that Medical Mechanical would target it at all.

Besides, it seemed they had something here. I mean, they wouldn't blow up their own building right?

Of course, there's no support for any of that. In the end we're just guessing again. It's futile, I know. But still… we needed that illusion that we had some control over our lives.

"KYAAAAAAA!"

As if on cue, the screams begin. So it looks like our luck has finally run out.

Looks like lost our bet in that roulette of fate.

"My panties!"

Her wut.

I turn the corner but no matter what I can't really discern the source of the scream.

"You down there! Catch them please!"

A shift to my side indicates that my mother's moved. In amazement, I stare at the undergarments that she holds in her right hand.

Again, wut.

"Thank god you're both girls!" The voice shouted. And now I see that I would have had to look up to find the source. "We have our laundry line up here and I bumped it! Erm. Could you hold on to them for me?" The mystery girl asked. "Could you bring them back tomorrow? Or in school? I'm Shiori, class 3-B!"

Tommorow?

Who dared. Who dared talk about tomorrow on a day like today?

"That's fine." My mother replies. "But why tomorrow?"

"Well it's Sunday!" Shiori replied. "We've all got to look out on Sunday! You should get ready too!"

I look at the empty, deserted streets in a new light. Sunday?

Look out?

Was that their method to handle this terrible fate?

To see it coming?

Perhaps they thought they could evacuate if they saw it.

Better than most systems we've ever seen.

"You seem…" My mother begins, brow creased. "…Exited."

"Well yeah!" Shiori replied. "I always get a kick out of this!"

Sick.

That's just sick.

"Oh hey, are you two new?" Shiori asked. "Is that why you aren't on your roof?"

My mother replied in the affirmative.

"Well do you want to come up? If you're going to live here you'll need to learn how to do this. Look, there's a ladder over there!"

Go up? It was true that no ceiling. No building, could offer any form of protection against The Bullet. But natural instinct…

My mother is already climbing. "Daughter…" she turns to me. "Hurry up."

…Geez

We find Shiori's whole family atop the roof. Absently I note my mother returning the girl's frilly pink panties.

"Everyone uses their own binoculars. That's the rule." Shiori explained apologetically. "And every family needs a computer. That's the rule too. Because you need to get on a chat-room. That's how we organize it."

What? Organize what?

As if Shiori could read my mind she smiled indulgently. "You'll see. It's a big show. And everyone gets excited about it every week. Well it really can't be helped. After all," she shrugged helplessly, "nothing ever happens in this town."

"Oooh! It's here!" A man, presumably Shiori's father exclaimed as he looked to the sky.

And then the woman, that was presumably Shiori's mother, began relaying a conversation she was hearing over her cellphone. And the father was typing away furiously.

And shiori herself was trying her best to hold a triangular ruler up to the sky.

And all three were chatting away making strange references rattling odd numbers and jokes.

'It's here'? He said 'it's here'?

Don't tell me…

Before the dread and despair even has the chance to sink in…

Before the terror can pull me out of the surrealism that I feel now surrounds me…

The mother yells. "It's over by the high-school!" And immediately the whole family snapped their binoculars towards the west.

I didn't have binoculars. But I could see it all the same.

The Bullet.

"Hey!" The mysterious girl yelled. "Plug your ears or you'll go deaf!"

I feel numb, more than anything, staring down death like this.

But my mother has the kindness to take hold of my hands and stuff my fingers in my ears.

I soon found out why. As the bullet hit the school, it impacted with an enormous sound.

Actually… it sounded like a bass guitar.

A/C... sharp.

The sound alone nearly bowled me over.

What in the…

The bullet stopped, a 1000 meter ball of death and lead frozen in time, Its terrible wrath put on hold as Shiori's family began to chant.

"Home run! Home run! Home run! Home run!"

And then… it was gone.

As if The Bullet had changed its mind, it was gone with a terrific 'boom' as quickly as it came.

Shiori's family cheered.

I just fell on my ass, stunned. My mother collapses beside me.

Shiori and her parents spent another five minutes staring at the sky, as if waiting for something else, before they sighed in unison.

"Guess that's it, huh?" Shiori muttered. "Well what now?"

The mother looked contemplative for a second.

Numbly, because I am still stupefied, I suggest that they celebrate.

"Oh no," the father waves off my idea, "it was another miss today."

A wut.

"Nice distance though!" He continued, excited. "Right out of the park!"

"You, young lady," the mother suddenly came out of her contemplation, addressing her daughter. "You have homework to do."

"D'aaaaw."

What is wrong with this town?

A/N: Yeah... I'm still running away from updating my main stories, so...

If you want chapter two, go to my author's page and make a review of my BETA's song reach me through any means neccessary. If anyone actually does so, you'll get chapter 2 right away.

So I started screwing around with FLCL. When you think about it, it's true to the nature of the anime. FLCL was never a serious project to begin with. That's part of what made it so awesome.

Also, 'wut' is that person's catchprase from now on. It's decided.