Author's Note: This definitely bothered me in canon. I realize of course that it is a children's game primarily and the point is Pokémon, not the tormented Team Skull leader, but why is it that NOBODY ever acknowledged that Guzma's behavior showed warning signs for anxiety/depression/PTSD? And I just saw a recent chapter of Pokémon adventures where he is literally BLEEDING after causing self-harm post-loss besides the hair pulling he does in game. Basically, Moon gets to have the conversations with in-game characters I wish I could have...

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To find the REAL Guzma. That had been the promise she made with herself the day they'd battled on the beach and he decided to follow Hala. Though that desire had ebbed and flowed throughout their interactions, the way he left her solidified it beyond a doubt. Not only had he shown a gentler side (at least by his standards), but she'd seen firsthand how unsettling his family was. Combine that with the nagging questions about his past with Hala and Kukui…

She stared at the ceiling as she lay on her bed. Since the beach incident, she'd been hanging around Melemele, trying to work out exactly what she wanted. It seemed silly to make this investigation her priority when she was nearly 19 years old and searching for a career goal. She'd completed the island challenge, and while she had no regrets about doing so, she didn't want to battle every day and become the champion. So, what else should she do now that she had a killer team of Pokémon and a large family of Pokémon hanging around in the Pokepelago? She should go to school, most likely. She'd always liked learning. But being a professor like Kukui, analyzing Pokémon more than reaching their hearts…it wasn't the type of learning she wanted to do even though she understood the appeal.

She should ask Kukui for his opinion, as much as he annoyed her at times. He knew her options as well as anyone on the island, being a young guy just gone through the career process. And while she was at it, she could press him for questions of a different nature. If she played her cards right, she might even be able to make it subtle. Grunting in satisfaction with this plan, she rolled out of bed and began lacing her shoes. Quick, before she lost her nerve.

She knocked three times before finally just barging in. It sounded from the outside like he was in the middle of some VERY loud experiments with Pokémon moves again today; a couple of crashes, thuds, once even something shattering… Kukui was certainly a character. While nowhere to be seen on the ground floor, she knew enough to peer into the basement. Sure enough, he was working on analyzing the moves of a Kantonian Raticate, which was currently flashing a scary face horrific enough to make both her and Kukui temporarily freeze. She quickly shook it off. "Hey, Kukui, do you have a minute?"

"Aue, Alondra! Let me take care of this little guy and I'll be right up!" he beamed as he flashed a thumbs up.

"'Kay." She moved to make herself comfortable on his couch. Tapping her foot nervously, she analyzed the room for the second time. The first time she'd been in here was when he announced they should complete the Island Challenge. Wow, that had been a while ago now… Her eyes traveled up to the now vacant loft, a sad smile twisting the corners of her mouth. It was strange that this time there was no Lillie guiding her around as his assistant. Today was also different in that everything she saw, she wondered how Kukui had gotten here while Guzma had gone in such a different direction.

"Hey, thanks for waiting, cousin. You need a drink or anything?" Kukui interrupted, emerging from the basement stairs.

She jumped. "No, that's fine. I just needed to talk to you about something. Say, how did you get a Kantonian Raticate to work with?"

He laughed, settling in on a chair across from her. "Ever since you moved here, Alondra, there's been a whole stir about the regional differences of Pokémon. Of course, Samuel Oak certainly has been pushing it along on a physiological path. But no one was comparing their move sets! It seemed like an interesting study to pursue, so I talked with the Kantonian champions who are here visiting the Battle Tree over on Poni Island. They allowed me to study their Raticate, Ninetails, Dugtrio… They are extremely proficient at catching Pokémon as well as battling them." He laughed again. "I will always be impressed with the level of talent over there. And speaking of talented Kantonians, here you are! Say, have you thought about challenging the League again?"

She blushed. "Well, that's what I'm here to talk to you about, Professor. I'm trying to figure out what to do now that my island challenge is over. The only thing I know is that I don't want to be Alola Champion, or Elite Four, or anything related to battling."

Kukui's eyebrows shot up in surprise. "But you've got so much talent, cousin! Hau only just beat you."

"Yeah, I know." Alondra began to fidget with her hands. "Don't take it the wrong way, it's not like I lost to him on purpose. But…I was happy it was him and not me. Battling all the time doesn't make me happy. I don't want to spend my life doing that. But I don't know what I should do."

Kukui frowned thoughtfully. "Do you want to keep in the Pokémon field?"

Alondra nodded quickly. "I love my Pokémon more than just about anything. I love seeing them reach their potential."

"Breeding, perhaps?"

She stared. That…was a really good answer. And it had taken him, what, all of two seconds to come up with it? "That actually sounds like something I'd enjoy. How do you get into that field?"

"I've got connections to the Daycare Center on Akala. I could get you an apprenticeship there."

Again, so easy. She supposed it wasn't this easy for everyone, but because of her recent exploits doors were opening for her right and left. "I'd like that, Kukui. Could you?"

"Absolutely, Alondra. You're the kind of person who's gonna be successful in anything they do. I'd recommend you whole-heartedly!" Kukui punched his fist into his palm enthusiastically.

She smiled, relieved. "Thank you. It's a weight off that's been bothering me a lot lately." Alondra took a deep breath. It was time to try and get to the other point of her visit. "How did you decide to become a professor?"

A grin spread across his features. "You know I love battling. I wanted to get better and better at it, and I thought learning about moves was the way to be successful. So, I decided to study them. I went abroad and learned all I could. I started up a lab here when I returned. It was simple at first, just a small cabin where I could test moves, put a few holes in the walls… But my colleagues were interested in the results, and I applied for grants to further my research. Meanwhile, I applied what I learned in battle to keep an income."

"So you always knew what you wanted?" she wondered, feeling a bit jealous of his confidence.

"Hmmm…. Yeah, I guess I did!" the professor beamed.

"So, what about your friends that did the trials with you. Did they always know what they wanted?"

"Ah, you mean Molayne? Yeah, he knew early on that steel Pokemon were his thing. He wanted to find ways for them and humans to coexist through technology. He was always a really handy guy, could pick apart machines and put 'em back together working with fewer parts!"

She remembered meeting the ex-Trial Captain when she went to challenge Sophocles. His easy-going nature hadn't made him a slouch at all in battle, and it was clear he was satisfied with his life after being a Captain. So, that was those two, but…

"And any others?"

Kukui shook his head, confused. "Nah, why do you ask?"

"Well, I thought you and Guzma did the Trials together too." She tried to look innocent, but Kukui shifted uncomfortably. That man was easy to read.

"Ah, you know how he is. He's always loved to battle. Always had a single-minded focus on being the best battler out there." Kukui scratched the back of his head with a nervous and obviously fake smile.

"He wanted to be a Captain," she prodded, hoping for more information.

'He- yeah. But, when things didn't work out, he wasn't very flexible. It's not good to be so focused on one thing alone, you know." Kukui breathed. "Be careful you don't fall into that trap. I think you'll be fine." He started to get up. "I should go check up on Raticate. Break time's over…"

"What happened when he didn't get the job?"

Kukui froze where he stood, studying her suspiciously. "You always seem to have so many questions about him."

Alondra folded her arms defensively. "I don't understand him, and it bothers me. I want to know why he ended up on the path he did. He's getting off of it, but how do you keep him from going back?"

For the first time in as long as she'd known Kukui, his face was contorted with a severe frown. "Curiosity is one thing, but you don't want to get dragged into that mess. He's not your problem to worry about, and he'll only get you in trouble. You've got too much going for you to get wrapped up in all that. Besides, I can't help you understand him. I don't understand him. Just drop it."

Now, Alondra stood up. "He said he trained under Hala once. He also said he'd given up on Hala, like they had a falling out. Now, Hala's taking him back under his wing to train him again, and he's agreed to it willingly. I don't care about the personal details about whatever caused the rift, but I wonder why Hala hasn't given up on him yet but you have."

Now, the young professor looked shocked. "Hala…took him back?!"

She nodded resolutely. "Yeah. He watched us battle on the beach, and when we were done he said making him a respectable trainer was how he was going to make amends. And, before he left, Guzma gave me this." She reached into her pocket and pulled out the Dawnstone. Kukui's eyes widened in recognition.

"His lucky Dawnstone?"

"Yeah. You can see why I am beyond confused." She took a deep breath. "Look, for now, there's just one thing I need to know: when he didn't get the position as Captain, what happened?"

"He ran away." Kukui closed his eyes and shook his head. "Didn't like the decision, threw a fit, and ran away. Next I'd heard of him, he was leading Team Skull from over on Ula'ula Island and starting to get in trouble. They enjoyed making life difficult for trial-goers and getting in the way of the Island Challenge. His idea of getting back at the system, I guess." A sigh escaped him. "I swear, he never grew up; all he's done since is cling to his bitterness about not getting what he wanted."

Well, that made sense, to an extent. All Guzma's rants about the 'moldy old traditions of Alola' came from being at the losing end of them. Still… "You honestly think not getting the position he wanted was enough for him to run away from home and start a gang? There was NOTHING else at play?"

Kukui squinted. "What else could there be to it? It's not what a NORMAL person would do, but Guzma's hardly normal."

"No, he's not." Alondra took a deep breath and collapsed back onto the couch. "It isn't normal to have anxiety attacks and practically commit self-harm when you lose a battle. That's exactly why I'm worried."

Her declaration had Kukui flabbergasted. Slowly, as if in a trance, he returned to his chair and sat. "You think his tantrums are anxiety attacks?"

Alondra stared. "You don't? Have you never seen the expression on his face when he loses? The raw dismay and loathing? The way he yanks on his hair like he's punishing himself? NOT EVEN THE WAY HE STARTS TALKING IN THIRD PERSON TO BASH HIMSELF?!"

"He…he never used to do that…"

"Yeah, well, you were at Malie Garden that day. You were right there when he started doing all that stuff. Am I crazy for thinking something was wrong? Do a lot of trainers do that?" Alondra was doing everything in her power not to turn to accusations, but Kukui's playing dumb (or maybe just being dumb) was nearly a breaking point. Was that man honestly so wrapped up in himself that he couldn't notice something so obvious about someone he once considered a friend?

Before she could really lose it, the flames of her anger were dampened by the look of guilt written all over the professor's face. "I guess I…I thought he was being dramatic, causing a scene to get attention or something. Has he really done that more than once?"

"Every time I've defeated him, without fail. Though, thankfully, this last time on the beach wasn't quite as bad even though it had all the same traits." She paused. "And Kukui, it's never anger at me for beating him. That's what makes it even stranger. He tells me I did a good job, gives me the money, no questions asked. And giving me that Dawnstone…it's clear he's not holding anything against me." I dare say he might actually respect me, she added internally.

It was apparently Kukui found that statement hard to believe. "He's against the world! And you are serious that he's never threatened you?"

"Well, he's told me he's going to beat me down the next time or whatever, but I don't think it's about crushing me as much as he wants to prove himself. Does that even make sense?" She rubbed her temples with a moan. "I don't even know anymore…"

"If it is like that, cousin, I'd actually feel a bit better," Kukui admitted, leaning back.

"Like knowing he's not actually a bad guy?"

He nodded somberly. "I never did like seeing how he ended up."

Well, it's not like you ever tried to figure out what was wrong, she thought. Best not to voice that though, not when she was finally getting somewhere. "That's very true, but that just means he needs help." To face what, she still needed to figure out, but now there was a nagging suspicion, a gut instinct. "Say, have you ever met his parents?"

That surprised him. "No, they never came to any of his matches back at the trainer's school. He never mentioned them either."

She thought for a moment. "I accidently found out where he lives and met his parents. His mom talks like he never did anything bad and everyone is just making up lies about him."

"Seriously?"

"Yeah, it's bad. And his dad…" she shivered. "I get a bad feeling from him. He talks so hatefully about Guzma, for even little things."

"Not that I'm defending him, but don't you think it's a natural reaction when your son goes and becomes a gang leader?"

She shook her head. "I can't say anything for certain. All I know is it makes me feel uncomfortable to be there, like something's not right. That's another reason why I'm asking questions, I guess. I don't like that thought of him going back to living there."

"Look, Alondra," Kukui ran his fingers through his hair in exasperation, "I know you mean well, but you seem to be implying some pretty heavy accusations. You're going to get yourself in trouble without evidence, and it could ruin your career. If he's got an issue with his folks, that's for him to work out, not you."

Alondra outwardly nodded her consent, but she mentally rejected the request immediately. When someone was the victim, they were rarely able to ask for help. She would not, of course, accuse, but she would not give up this investigation. Not when she seemed to be the only one who cared enough to look closely.

She rose abruptly. It seemed this conversation was over. It gave her very little to go off of, but at least she'd gotten a few bits of information. "I'm sorry this got so serious. It has been eating at me though, and it was a relief to get it off my chest. Thank you for your advice, Professor."

"I will let you know when I hear back from the breeding center," was his response, a fake smile brushing the past conversation under the carpet. Of course. Ignore the issue.

"All right, I'll keep my fingers crossed!" she replied, mimicking the false up-beat attitude. "Have fun with Raticate!"

Once the door to the lab was closed, she walked quickly back in the direction of her house. Kukui had said he'd never seen Guzma act so distressed when he was young, but how observant had Kukui, then just a kid himself, been? And he was studying abroad when Guzma applied for Trial Captain, so he'd have no idea if that sparked anything. Hala would be the one with the answers, but he was currently occupied with Guzma who-knew-where. Nothing to do but wait for now. Or… She reached into her pocket and clutched the Dawnstone tightly. She might just have one more chance to get into Guzma's house while he was gone and get more answers, even if the idea scared her.