Okay, before you guys come at me with pichforks and flaming torches, I have to tell you This was spawned from some random cock joke that my friends made on AIM. This is why Edgeworth was named Miles. Please R&R, it will help me write better stories!

-fo0n

Note: All characters are copyright of Capcom.

1992 - Beaufort Hospital – 7:22 P.M.

"Come on sweetie, just push a bit more," said Gregory Edgeworth, anxiously watching his first child being born. "Just one more push!"

"I'm trying, dammit!" panted the lady next to him. "I'd like to see you try this!" She pushed again and grabbed Gregory's right arm so tightly, he could've sworn that she broke his arm, or at least cut off all the circulation.

"Ow! Damn, that hurt, Joanna!" exclaimed Gregory.

The wife tried to apologize, but then she let out a massive scream.

"OMGWTFBBQ!" screamed Joanna as the baby was pushed into the world.

The doctor who was holding the baby gave it to a nurse to wash the fluids off, and the doctor started to examine the baby.

"Hm. Six and a half pounds, eighteen inches, and HOT DAMN you've got one helluva son!" The doctor looked at the two parents, who were staring at him with quizzical looks.

The doctor quickly apologized for the minor curse. "Sorry about that, but take a look at this!" He held the naked baby up to the new parents. According to their faces, they were as shocked as the doctor, as a glowing aura surrounded the child.

In a certain area.

"How did he get that?" asked Joanna.

"It's a one in one million chance baby, ma'am," replied the doctor. "You parents should be proud." He tried to high-five Greg, but it ended up being kind of awkward.

Gregory's mouth was agape. His baby, a one in one million chance? He knew then he would have a very special child with him.

"Hey sweetie, how about we call him Miles?" Joanna asked.

Gregory laughed. It perfectly described his new son. "Well, it does go an extra mile, so why not?"

The doctor again gave the baby to the nurse, who wrapped in a warm cloth blanket. The doctor received it again, and handed the baby to the parents with a smile.

"And now I give you...Miles Edgeworth!"

The two new parents each gave Miles a kiss on the cheek.

20XX – District Courthouse Men's Restroom – 2:27 P.M

Three men were seen charging into the men's restroom. They were a spiky-haired defense attorney, a frilly prosecutor, and a detective. They rushed to the unoccupied stalls and started to unzip their pants.

"Wright, you jerk! What an idiot you are to make a water cooler chugging contest!" Edgeworth whined.

"Edgeworth, you jerk! What an idiot you are to accept my water cooler chugging challenge!" Phoenix replied, mimicking Miles' whiny tone.

"I believe you got served, pal," said Gumshoe. He shrugged at the look on Miles' face. "Even though I have no idea what that means."

Edgewoth wasn't listening. His pants zipper wasn't budging. He pulled down without any success. He then look enviously at Wright and Gumshoe, who were relieving themselves of their earlier water chugging contest, making Edgeworth's urge to go even stronger.

"Dammit, zipper! Open, you little piece of shi-"

The zipper finally went down. Miles sighed relief, then noticed that Phoenix and Gumshoe were staring at his wee-wee.

"Gosh, pal. Your pal is huge," Gumshoe said with shock.

"You know, it's rude to stare," scoffed Miles.

"God, Miles, exactly how long is it?"

Edgeworth sighed. He knew his would happen someday. This is why he went into public restrooms when no one was there. But still, they were his friends and colleagues, and decided to answer.

"It's sixteen inches, eight by birth," he replied nonchalantly.

"Eight inches by birth? You're freaking kidding me!" Phoenix exclaimed.

"I'm not lying, Wright. It's the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth," Edgeworth retorted.

The defense attorney scratched his head sheepishly.

"You really live up to your name, Miles."

"And why do you think that?" the frilly prosecutor asked, crossing his arms and stared as Wright with a questioning look.

"Your dick can go on for miles!" Phoenix replied, and started to crack up.

Gumshoe was also amused by the joke. "Wright's got a point, pal," he said as he spoke to Edgeworth, trying not to laugh so hard.

Edgeworth was about to lose it. He just talked about his most intimate area, and these two morons were making fun of it? He now glared a t now calm Phoenix and Gumshoe with a stare that clearly read: You're dead, bitches.

Phoenix and Gumshoe ran out of the bathroom as if Manfred von Karma was about to tase them, laughing with tears flowing out of their eyes.

"Damn, and to think that guy's never been laid."

OO...Disturbing, no? Anyways, R&R. I hope you enjoyed it.