i don't know what this is and i'm sorry. yell at me in a review so i'll finish a proper fic xx

"Lil," James says, careful, clasping her hands over the wooden table and looking her dead in the eye. "Just how much firewhiskey have you had already tonight?"

Lily only laughs in return, pulling her hands from his only to curl her fingers around the neck of the near empty bottle resting near her elbow. "Not enough to make up for all those months of sobriety," she answers, swallowing whatever's left in one smooth gulp. "It's nearly Christmas, James, relax."

"What does that even have to do with anything?" James pouts as Sirius rummages in the cupboard for something more to drink. "Last bottle, Pads," James calls, and Sirius tosses a couple choice swear words in their general direction, before ambling back to the table with a family sized bag of crisps. "Cheers, Prongs."

Lily snatches a crisp from Sirius' hand and pops it in her mouth, giggling. Sirius slaps her wrist and maintains a protective hold over the bag. "Ask nicely," he says, "and maybe you can have another."
"Please?" Lily whines, eyes wide atop a perfectly executed puppy face.

James scowls. "Stop trying to seduce Padfoot," he grunts, aiming a kick in Sirius' direction.

Lily smirks. "If I were to seduce anyone, it wouldn't be Sirius," she says. "No offense."

"None taken," Sirius says easily, but James looks no happier. "So who are you seducing, then?"

"Mariah Carey," she answers promptly, causing Sirius to snicker and spit crumbs across the table. "She's stunning."

"I'm not smashed enough for this conversation," James mutters, as Sirius nods heartily. "Good eye, Red."

Lily looks at James, whose hands are tangled in his hair. He has a particular frown on his face, one Lily hasn't seen since sixth year, when that Ravenclaw prefect asked her to Hogsmeade for Valentines Day. And it clicks.

He's actually jealous.

"James Potter," she says slowly, looking absolutely wicked. "Do you want me to seduce you?" He doesn't respond, stubborn bloke that he is, and Lily grins, a maniacal gleam in her eyes. She puts on a breathy, affected tone and sings, "I just want you for my own more than you could ever know. Make my wish come true- all I want for Christmas is youuuu."

James looks slightly dazed as she draws out the last syllable for a solid five seconds. "Did it work?" she asks, eager. "It was Mariah Carey."

"Shut it, Evans," James says lightly, his hand moving to Lily's thigh.

"It's been 15 years, Potter," Lily retorts, gently fiddling with his curls. "Why is calling me Evans still such a turn-on for you?"

"Oi!" Sirius shouts, making to get up from his chair. He stumbles a couple times but like everything Sirius Black ever does, it has its own unique elegance and grace. "Get a room you two, there are children present."

"No conscious ones," Lily mutters, and naturally, the Muggle baby monitor propped on the kitchen counter begins to crackle with the unmistakable sound of a newborn's wailing. "Screw you, Sirius," Lily adds, but she's smiling as she heads upstairs.

"Don't drop the kid!" Sirius calls, and Lily flips him the bird, trying her hardest not to sway. Because really, she isn't that drunk. Really.

It only occurs to her that trying to change a nappy is really, really difficult after a third of a bottle of firewhiskey when Harry stumbles into the nursery, yawning, and finishes the job for her. "Some role model you are," he teases, grinning and depositing the baby in her bassinette with a soft kiss. "You lot woke me up, by the way. I'm staying at school next holiday."

"Of course you are," Lily agrees, shepherding him to his room. "Go to bed, sweetheart."

"Night, Mum," Harry says, getting up on his toes to avoid the kiss she tries to drop on his cheek. "I'm too old for that."

"Hey, Evans," James whispers later, as she pads into their bedroom. She lifts an eyebrow in his direction, suddenly too tired to speak. He snorts, then sings, very off tune, "oh, all the lights are shining so brightly everywhere and the sound of children's laughter fills the air".

And after every pillow on their bed is thrown in his direction, then dusted and replaced, and teeth are brushed and good night kisses exchanged, Lily and James are still laughing.