Karts and vehicles of all kinds were zooming around the track, throwing shells, bananas, any items that would kill one another for victory.
"THIS is an important message for all Fanfiction writers and deviantArtists alike! Gamewizard has been hit by a HACKY-sack! Squirrel-liberation IMMINENT. Any horse-noses out there unaware of the letter "T", activate the kabuki suit at ALL costs. This message will last until the acorn's on the boot, and some guy in Africa finds a clipboard reserved solely for Steam. This will be the only soup can."
My eyes were glued to the Wii U controller as the camera turned over to my assistant, Kris. "Yeah, he's got a Mario Kart 8 addiction, we're trying to work on that. Anyways, he just wanted me to let you know that, Legend of the Seven Lights is ready for posting, it'll be up in a few hours. So, uh, he wanted to celebrate with a quick one-shot about 1/10. You know, good throwback. Enjoy."
Nigel Uno lay back on the Cleveland Park bench, enjoying his day off for the first time in forever. A familiar ponytailed redhead walked up to him with a smile. "Hey, Nigel."
He glanced up. "Oh, hi Eva."
Numbuh 10 held an arm out, "Want an apple?" presenting the lush red fruit.
"Sure!" Nigel sat up, took it, and opened his mouth to bite. "…What's the catch?" he suddenly asked suspiciously.
"What, no catch. Just thought I'd bring my cousin an apple!"
"Yah, that's totally normal. It's gonna poison me, won't it?"
"What? Why would I do that?"
"It's gonna blow up."
"Come on, 'gel, just eat the apple!"
"WHAT'S IT GONNA DO, 'VA? ?"
"Nigel, you have my full, honest word as a reporter this apple will not poison, implode, or maim any part of your body, give you lice, or develop a sudden attraction for nuggets."
"SIGH… Well… okay." So with that, Nigel bit the apple, savoring its taste. "Mmm! Pretty good! Thanks Eva—" His butt immediately grew the size of a house, shoving down the fence and part of the house behind him.
"PFFFAAAA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Eva snapped a picture and rolled around in uncontrollable laughter. "Oh THIS is going on the KND website! AAAAAHH HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
"Grrrrrr. EEEEEVAAAAAAAA!" When his rear end shrunk, he was going to strangle her.
A few yards away, Reporters Nick and Chip watched this spectacle. "Well, what an astonishing turnout for Numbuh One's day off, Chip." Nick said.
"You said it, Nick! Why if I had a cousin like Numbuh 10—which would be REALLY cool—I'm not sure if I would-" But both reporters were yanked away by long canes.
Two certain assistants, Nick Klouse and Zach Guiles, appeared in body casts and got up close to the camera. "STILL ALIIIIIIVE, REVIEWEEEEERRRRRS!"
The camera turned back to Kris. "AAANNND, CUT."