English is not my native language, so please excuse mistakes wether they are big or not. They are all mine and just mine.
As all writers I'm addicted to reviews, so give me my dayly dose of it.
Something else?
Yeah...this is a bit AU where Cas didn't go all Leviathan an Gabe and Balthazar are still up and kicking. I just love these guys and had to keep them.
So, now let's get started...
1. Shopping with Dean is no fun
Sam Winchester really hated his brother at the moment. Every fibre of his gigantic being wanted nothing more than to beat that smug smile out of his brothers face as Dean waved the bottle of conditioner in front of his face.
"We still have to search for your lady shaver Samantha if you really want to look good tonight.", he commented and dropped the pink wrapped conditioner into the shopping trolley before he turned and strolled into the next lane.
"Dean you stupid prick! Don't you dare!", he shouted and started following his brother. Whether to stop him from behaving like a seven year old boy or to grab his neck an suffocate him was not finally decided yet.
One week without a hunt in a shabby motel and his brother got all crazy and annoying on him.
The old lady next to him shot him a glance and mumbled something he couldn't hear but it was to much today.
"Lady...I'm already on the edge of my nerves because of my mentally retarded brother, so WHAT do you have to say?", he hissed to her.
The white-haired old lady looked up to him with friendly eyes and an open smile on her face.
"Darling, I only told you that there is nothing better than hot wax to get rid of bothersome hair on certain places. Believe me I have more than enough experience and to be honest men usually prefer..."...Sam was absolutely positive about feeling several simultaneous strokes shutting his brain down and at least on blood vessel in his nose bursting.
Without waiting till the lady finished her assumptions about his sex life and his sexual preferences, Sam almost ran off into the next lane keeping his beet red face down on the floor. He had to find Dean...and he would DEFINITELY get strangled that bastard of a brother. Fuck family, fuck the fact that Dean sold his soul for his life, fuck everything. He would grab that throat that kept Deans shit filled head on his shoulders and entwine his large hands around it...and he would throttle till this smug smile would vanish forever. Yeah...sounded like a good plan.
However, he first had to find him in this labyrinth of a supermarket. Who the heck needed a four storeys high supermarket anyway? Was it really necessary to have an assortment of at least one hundred different brands of oat meal? What the heck could there be the difference?
"Dean!", he shouted, after the third lane without a sight of his brother. With a sigh he kept on going ignoring the irritating mountain of toilet paper to his right and the ridiculous masses of toothpaste to his left.
In front of him the old lady from before turned into the lane and gave him a wink.
"Still searching for the hot wax Sammy?", she asked with a wide grin and waved with a epilator at him.
"Lady, please...", Sam started and stopped all of a sudden, still staring at the lady.
"Oh come on darling. There is nothing wrong about taking care of that gigantic body of yours. Just give it a try..I mean..it's not like waxing would kill you.", she kept on babbling still approaching the hunter meter by meter.
Sam stiffened instantaneous and reached behind his back where his gun sat in his waistband.
Without hesitation the hunter grabbed the old lady, threw her into the shelf next to him and pointed the gun at her head.
Her grin still stayed at her face.
"Aww..Sammy, always so rude...I like that and you know it..but unfortunately we don't have time for these kind of games at the moment. ", she whispered to him and popped a lolli into her mouth.
"Gabriel?", Sam croaked without removing the gun.
"As deplorable as it is to interrupt the two of you during your pubertal mating, and as much as I would appreciate to see how big our homo erectus here tries to shoot you but I'm afraid that there are more pressing matters we have to attend to.", came an other voice with an English accent.
"Balthazar?", Sam whispered, before he fell forward, Gabriel gone in a flutter of wings and reappearing next to Balthazar in his trademark vessel.
"Great. Big human can at least remember our names. Let's see if his mentally retarded oh so righteous brother...", Balthazar looked around while Gabriel kept on sucking his Lolli, none of the two even trying to help to stand up who still sat on his butt on the floor.
"...where is he by the way? Shouldn't he be hovering over your shoulder like a guardian angel?", the angel kept on mocking.
"No. At the moment the mentally retarded guardian angel is pointing a gun at your head featherbrains.", hissed the older hunter from behind Belthazar.