Disclaimer: I do not own these characters, but I do own my imagination which takes me on wonderful adventures.
Meant To Be
Unexpected
"Severus," Draco's voice came from the floo, "Are you free for tea tomorrow? I have something important I need to show you."
Looking up from a pile of paperwork, he was dealing with, Severus responded, "Draco, it's the end of the semester. I'm quite busy right now. Can it wait another week?"
"No, it can't, Severus," Draco answered. "It just might turn your world upside down. I promise it will be worth your time. Oh, and prepare your pensieve."
0-0-0-0-0
"Draco, we've had tea, discussed your job and trip to the States ad nauseam and caught up on all the 'news'. I have a lot of work to do before the leaving feast on Thursday. What earth-shattering discovery do you have to show me?" Severus was aggravated at the waste of time.
"Where is your pensieve?" Draco asked, looking around and walking over to the table holding the bowl.
Beginning to be concerned about what he might see, Severus asked, "What is this all about?"
"When I was in New York last week," Draco answered, "I finished up the negotiations with the publishing house earlier than I expected. I still had a full day left to enjoy my visit and decided to take myself to the Museum of Natural History. While there…"
Severus was getting more annoyed. "Draco, you've already taken up my whole afternoon. I don't have time for a visit ot the museum right now..."
"A little patience please, Severus," Draco continued, placatingly. "While there, I saw a group of students on a school field trip. I want to know if you see what I did."
"Maybe you need to make an appointment with your optometrist, Draco."
"Humor me, Sev, okay?"
0-0-0-0-0
Severus and Draco landed on the sidewalk outside the Museum of Natural History. In front of the building, there was a group of about 40 boys approximately 12-13 years of age, getting ready to board the bus returning them to school. One teacher stood at the door of the bus checking off names as they boarded and a second one stood to the outside of the line maintaining order.
"Mr. Evans, will we be tested on what we saw today at the museum?" one boy asked.
"Mr. Stevens and I will review the material you'll need, Jason. There's no need to worry."
Severus gasped as he heard the soft British-accented voice and looked around to find its owner. His eyes came to rest on the teacher standing at the door of the bus and he visibly paled.
Moving closer, Severus took note of the dark hair neatly pulled back in a tail, the slight build, the thin wire-rimmed glasses framing intensely green eyes, and, very faintly, the lightning-bolt shaped scar on the brow.
As 'Mr. Evans' counted the final student, the other teacher called out, "Is that all of them, Jamie?"
"That's all of them, Mike. Let's go," he answered and they both boarded the bus.
Draco closed the distance behind Severus and they both watched as the bus pulled away from the museum before exiting the pensieved memory.
After a few moments of silence, Draco began, "Severus…"
Severus interrupted, bewildered, "I don't understand – he's dead!"
"We all thought so," Draco answered. He hesitated. "So, what do you think happened?"
Severus gathered his thoughts for a few moments and stated the facts. "Well, neither you nor I witnessed the final battle between Harry and the Dark Lord. The reports I've heard though, all say there was a blinding white glow surrounding the two of them and when it dissipated, there was no trace left of either one. We know that the Dark Lord is gone because the dark marks have disappeared. We just assumed that Harry met the same fate, since there was no proof otherwise."
"Until now," Draco added.
"Until now," Severus conceded. "What if the backlash transported him somewhere?"
"But, Severus, if that was the case, then why wouldn't he have come back? Even if he had been hurt, he should have come back or notified us as soon as he was able. It's been ten years." Draco continued with his speculation. "Maybe he doesn't remember who he is – he was using a different name."
"Not possible. Look at the name he chose: Jamie Evans – his father's given name and his mother's maiden name." Severus paused, then continued. "It's possible that maybe he didn't want to come back. What if he decided to start over – have a life? He never really had one as the Boy-Who-Lived. And he lost so much – family, friends… this was his chance to live."
"And what of the two of you? I thought you had some sort of relationship going on," Draco ventured.
"Maybe it was too little, too late. Our history wasn't particularly easy… though I, too, thought we had progressed beyond friendship. Maybe it wasn't meant to be," Severus' brow creased in thought.
"So, what now?" Draco asked.
"I have responsibilities here to tend to right now, but I will give it some thought."
0-0-0-0-0
Doubts
Severus stood on a quiet, tree-lined street in an upscale neighborhood. He was dressed as a muggle in dark jeans and a navy oxford shirt. He looked again at the address printed on the parchment in his hand for "Highpoint Academy." It appeared to be a small, private school for boys. The schoolyard and buildings were well kept, but empty and quiet as the school year had terminated a few days earlier. As luck would have it, though, this was one of the schools which instituted teacher workdays prior to closing down for the summer holiday.
Severus intoned a notice-me-not charm under his breath and waited for Harry to exit the building. He didn't have to wait long before the object of his surveillance came out accompanied by the same teacher from the pensieved memory.
As they headed for the teacher's parking lot, Severus overheard Mike ask Harry if he'd like a ride home. Severus let out a relieved breath when Harry turned him down, saying he'd promised Vera that he'd pick up her favorites for dinner that night.
Severus froze. Who is Vera? Is Harry married? Has he moved on with his life? Am I interfering? Should I go? Maybe he doesn't want any reminders of his past. Or of me? Of us?
He didn't know what to do. After much internal debate, he decided that he had come halfway around the world to see Harry; he would do what he came for and find out if Harry was happy and why he disappeared. He felt that Harry owed at least that much to the friends he had left behind. But, he decided with resignation, he would accept whatever Harry wished.
So, Severus followed him to the market and then to the bakery. Afterwards, Harry led Severus through Central Park to his apartment building and into the lobby. He paused while Harry entered the elevator and rode to the sixth floor.
Severus checked the name on the mailboxes and took note of the number neatly printed in block letters next to the name 'Evans'. Then, he rode the elevator up to the sixth floor and found his way to the apartment. A plaque on the door below the peephole confirmed the apartment.
Again, Severus debated with himself if he was doing the right thing. He paced back and forth for a few minutes, but his need to know won out. Removing the notice-me-not charm, Severus lifted his hand and knocked on the door.
0-0-0-0-0
Ten Years Earlier: The Night before the Big Battle
The castle was quiet, as though she was holding her breath. Most of her inhabitants were asleep, blissfully ignorant of what the morrow would bring. Only a relative few – members of the staff, the Order of the Phoenix and the DA – were aware of the heavy weight of the silence.
One restless soul wandered through the dark hallways, his feet leading him where they will. He suddenly became aware that he had somehow ended up in the dungeons, standing in front of the private chambers of Severus Snape. Not wishing to wake the man if he was sleeping, but wanting company if he wasn't, Harry knocked lightly on the door.
Hearing "Come" from within, Harry pushed open the door and entered.
"I was wondering when you'd show up, Harry," Severus said, staring into the fire and swirling a glass of amber-colored fire-whiskey in his hand.
"How'd you know I would?" Harry asked. "How'd you know it was me?"
Severus allowed a small smile to grace his lips. "After nearly 20 years of spying, seven as your teacher and then the last two in intensive training with you, I believe I have come to know some of your habits quite well, as, evidently, since you are here at this hour, you have become aware of some of mine."
"May I?" Harry asked, indicating the bottle of fire-whiskey.
"Help yourself."
Harry took a glass from the shelf and poured himself some whiskey before settling into 'his' chair by the fire.
After a few minutes of comfortable silence, Harry inquired, "When this is all over and done, Sev, what will you do? Will you stay and teach? You'll be free, you know. You can finally be recognized for your research and discoveries."
"That is certainly something that I have always hoped for; however, I think that it's not a realistic dream for me. My name has very negative connotations associated with it. I will be unpopular and unaccepted. Not much different than now," Severus responded, wistfully.
"Just don't give up, Sev. Promise me you won't," Harry pleaded. "Once people begin to realize just how important you've been to winning this war and how much you gave up for them, they'll turn around. You'll see."
"You've always had so much faith in others, Harry. Your infinite optimism astounds me."
"It's a perfect foil to your perpetual pessimism, Severus," Harry chuckled. "We work well together."
"That we do, Harry, that we do." The two lapsed into companionable silence once again.
"What about you, Harry? Maybe get that family you've always wanted – have a house full of children?" Severus ventured.
"Even if I were to have a future, I don't envision any children in it," Harry responded sadly, resigned.
Stunned, Severus turned and stared at Harry. "What? What do you mean, 'if you were to have a future?' You will survive this."
Harry turned and looked up. "No, Sev. You know I'm not meant to survive this war. You've heard the prophecy: 'neither can live while the other survives'," he said, stressing the words 'neither' and 'other'. He took note of Severus' paled expression. "You didn't know, did you. Dumbledore figured it out two years ago and Hermione nearly a year before that. 'Neither', meaning neither myself nor Tom lives, while the 'other'– you – survives."
Severus paled even further. "No, that can't be," he whispered in distress.
"Severus, ever since I learned of the prophecy in my fifth year, I've known it was my fate to die in this war, and until you started training me, I never even believed I would have the chance to do what I was meant to do before I died. I've had a long time to absorb and accept this."
"No, Harry…" Severus tried, but words failed him.
Harry placed his glass of fire-whiskey on the small table between their chairs. He rose from his seat and knelt in front of Severus. Placing his palms on Severus' knees, Harry looked up into the dark eyes full of anguish.
"Severus, I was born into this prophecy and I have been tempered and honed all my life to be able to meet my fate. I don't want this – I never have. But, I've never had free choice in anything and I've never known anything else. I am nothing more than a weapon, a tool, just something to be used to an end, literally," he added with a hint of bitterness. "That's the way it was meant to be."
"You've always been more than that to me, Harry, even when we…"
"…hated each other?" Harry interrupted.
"…clashed," Severus finished softly, touching his fingers lightly to Harry's cheek.
Harry closed his eyes, let out a soft sigh, turned and sank to the floor. He rested his cheek on Severus' knee. "I know."
Severus threaded his fingers through Harry's hair for a few moments. "What did you mean when you said 'you don't envision children in your future'? I have always thought that you, of all people, would want a child."
Harry sighed again. Sadly shaking his head, he said softly, "I'm gay, Sev. I thought you knew." He paused, then added, "I suppose I probably would have adopted. There are bound to be many war orphans when this is all over."
The two friends sat taking strength from each other's comforting presence, each lost in his own thoughts.
Logs shifting in the fireplace pulled Harry from his contemplation. Taking a deep breath, he stood up from his seat on the floor at Severus' feet and headed for the door. "I'll let you get some sleep. We have a big day tomorrow. Good night, Severus."
As he headed for the door, he heard, very quietly, "Harry…" followed by the rustling of robes. He felt a hand turn him gently around.
Severus reached out with his other hand and lifted Harry's chin looking into bottomless green pools. He caught his breath at the swirl of emotions he saw there: confusion, doubt, need, desire and many more he couldn't identify.
Very slowly, he leaned forward and pressed his lips to Harry's. Pulling back, he saw surprise and wonderment reflected there.
"Stay, Harry," Severus entreated quietly as he traced Harry's face with his fingers.
"I'd like that," Harry breathed, a slow smile making itself known.
Severus' hand slid from Harry's arm around his back and pulled him closer.
The kiss this time met in the middle, tentative at first but slowly gaining confidence and intensity. When they broke for air, Severus took Harry's hand and led him into the bedroom.
0-0-0-0-0
Renewed Acquaintances
Severus knocked on the apartment door. He heard a voice bidding him to enter, followed a moment later by, "I'll be right out."
He waited patiently by the front door taking in the décor. The apartment was decorated in muted shades of blue and green against a cream background. There was also a lot of natural wood to be seen. Overall, the room had a comfortable, soothing atmosphere. A large window dominated one end of the apartment suffusing the space with light and warmth. The wall facing Severus was dedicated to an entertainment system, framed photos and other knick-knacks. Three doors were visible along the same wall which Severus surmised led to a bathroom and two bedrooms or maybe one bedroom and a study.
At the other end of the apartment, was a small dining area with seating for four around a circular table and an archway leading into the kitchen. Along the wall with the entryway, were well-filled bookcases. The living area contained comfortable seating: a small couch with two matching recliners and a coffee table set on a neutral area rug.
Suddenly, Severus heard a gasp followed immediately by the sound of breaking china. He turned quickly to see Harry's face go pale and reached out to steady him.
Harry stared. "Se–Severus?" he stammered, wide-eyed. "I don't… How…? You're dead!" he finally got out.
"I don't believe I am, but I can understand your confusion. I thought the same of you until a week ago when I was presented with incontrovertible evidence to the contrary," Severus grinned wryly. "Think you can stand on your own?"
Harry's face flushed, but he regained his balance.
"It's good to see you, Harry," Severus said softly.
"I think I'm in shock," Harry replied, swallowing thickly but not removing his eyes from Severus' face. "I was making some tea," he said unnecessarily. "Would you…" he paused, "would you like some?"
"Yes, Harry, thank you. I'll take care of this," he said, indicating the broken teacup on the floor.
Reluctantly pulling his gaze from the man, Harry entered the kitchen as Severus muttered a quick 'reparo' and a cleaning charm.
Harry brought out a tray with tea things and a plate of biscuits from the kitchen, but stopped short as he saw Severus again. He gave himself a small shake and, with a wry grin, said, "This is so surreal." He shook his head again, headed into the living room and set the tray down on the coffee table.
Severus followed Harry while looking around the room and scanning the various photos and items placed here and there on the shelves.
His eyes froze as his gaze caught sight of a photograph of a young girl with long, dark hair and green eyes and another of the same girl with Harry standing behind her, his arms draped over her shoulders.
"Who is this girl?" Severus asked as he picked up the frame. There was a tremble in his voice.
In an apparent non-sequitor, Harry began in a whisper, "I thought you were dead. I sat by your body in the shrieking shack for two days and I felt so lost." His voice broke. "I don't understand."
"I was aware of the Dark Lord's penchant for using Nagini to kill his enemies, so while I was prepared with anti-venom, I hadn't expected such a vicious attack. I was in danger of bleeding to death, so I took the only option available to me at that moment – I used the Draught of Living Death," Severus explained.
Harry nodded his head, "I guess that would have had the effect of making you appear dead. But I didn't know that. So, when I finally heard the medics coming to collect your body, I took off. I just couldn't bear seeing anyone." The tears gathered in his eyes. "I walked all night to get as far away as I could so no one would be able to trace me. Then I un-shrunk my broom and flew. I just flew and flew. I have no idea how much time had passed or where I was. Days and weeks passed in a haze. I slept when I was tired and ate when I was hungry."
Harry took a deep breath and continued his story. "After a few weeks, I realized something was wrong. I thought that maybe I had been hit with a stray curse during the battle that had a time-delayed activation. I wasn't feeling well. I was nauseous and dizzy and had no energy. I was afraid to continue flying, so I landed."
"I was somewhere in Northern Scotland. Using a spare wand I kept for emergencies, I cast a glamour on myself and searched out a medi-wizard. At first, he couldn't find anything wrong with me. He decided to consult with another healer. After some research and some more tests, one suddenly had an idea. He performed a spell I didn't know. They began whispering to each other and giving me strange looks. Finally, they cast another spell that caused me to glow with a purple aura."
Severus gasped as comprehension dawned.
Harry paused. "You understand," he stated.
Severus nodded. "You were pregnant," he added breathlessly. He looked down at the picture he held in his hands. "That's how you survived. A wizard pregnancy is so rare and powerful that they have developed their own form of protection." He paused. "Love – 'the power the dark lord knows not'," Severus quoted the prophecy, awed.
"Her name is Severa Lily," Harry commented softly, gently laying his hand on top of Severus' on the picture frame.
Severus swallowed a few times, gathering his emotions. "I have a child," he whispered. He looked up at Harry, eyes glistening. "I never dreamed…"
"She was invited to spend the day with a friend, but I expect her home in about an hour or so," Harry offered. "How about that tea now?"
Severus nodded, still too emotional to speak.
After a few quiet, calming sips, Severus asked, "Why did you leave everything behind? Why wouldn't you want your friends to be there for you? We all thought you were dead. We had a funeral and there have been memorial services each year."
Harry picked up his story again. "When the white light surrounded us, I felt that time stood still. Everything I knew, everyone I ever met – all flashed through my head. But when they all faded away, I was left with only one image. My only thoughts were of you and times we spent together, both good and bad. Soon the light started to fade and Tom splintered into thousands of pieces. All I knew at that moment is that I had to find you. I apparated to the shack before the light faded completely. But I was too late – you weren't breathing and there was so much blood. There was no pulse. Your body was so cold and stiff." He paused and breathed deeply. "You already know the rest of what happened."
"But after you discovered your… predicament… Why didn't you come back? Severus pressed.
"I was in shock. I had no idea what to do or where to go when I left the shack. Remember, I wasn't expecting to survive. I had already said my goodbyes. I had no plans left – nothing to anchor me. I needed to clear my head, get my emotions under control. So I left."
"Once I found out I was pregnant, I knew I couldn't come back. I could just imagine the headlines: Savior Pregnant with Death Eater's Child. I couldn't put that kind of pressure on my child. I had to leave. Somehow though, I realized that even from beyond the veil, you saved me again. You gave me a reason to live, a chance at a new life and a family." The tears flowed down his cheeks.
"I secretly left the United Kingdom and found a small wizarding community in upstate New York. I created a new identity for myself and applied for a high school equivalency certificate so I could enroll in University. In the meantime, I gave birth to Severa. It wasn't easy at first – studying for a degree and caring for an infant on my own, but I wouldn't trade it for anything."
"Once I got my teaching degree, I found work here in the city. During the summer holidays, Severa and I go back to New Salem so we can spend time in the wizarding world and practice new skills. Severa's magic is strong, not surprising given her parentage," Harry added, smirking.
Severus swallowed before asking, "Have you told her…? How much does she know about…?" Lowering his eyes, he swallowed again but couldn't continue.
Harry reached over and laid his hand on Severus' knee. Keeping it there, he waited for Severus to look up before speaking. When he did, Harry said softly, "She knows all of it – my childhood, the war, both our parts in it, our history with each other – all that I know."
"She's a lot like you, you know," Harry continued. "Not a day goes by that I'm not reminded of you: the way she moves, her hands, her quick wit, her love of learning. You'll be proud of her. She's strong and smart and she's beautiful – inside and out."
"I don't know how to be a father," Severus worried. "Maybe I should go before she gets back. I don't want to shock her."
"Please stay," Harry pleaded. "She'll think you didn't want to meet her if you leave now."
"What if I'm not what she imagined?" whispered Severus.
"She won't think that," Harry was quick to reassure.
"But what if she does?"
"Then you'll just have to convince her otherwise. I've done my best to teach her to have an open mind and to think for herself. She won't condemn you without reason. Give her that chance. Give it to yourself. You won't be disappointed."
0-0-0-0-0
The Moment of Truth
Harry and Severus were putting away the tea things, when voices could be heard in the hallway coming closer. The door opened and a voice called out, "Daddy?"
"Vera, how was your day?" Harry answered coming out of the kitchen, drying his hands on a dishtowel. He hugged her. "I missed you."
"It was brilliant!" Severa enthused. "Aunt Ella took us to an amusement park. We went on all the rides, even the roller coaster and the giant Ferris wheel!" Severa hugged Harry. "Thanks for letting me go."
Harry laughed. "I'm glad you had a great time, but it's not me you need to thank."
Severa blushed, then turned to Ella. She hugged her around the middle. "Thank you, Aunt Ella. I had a wonderful time."
"It was my pleasure, Sweetie. Andi and I both enjoyed having you along," Ella responded. "I'm afraid, though, Jamie, that Vera's not going to be very hungry for dinner. We were having such a good time that we ended up leaving lunch rather late."
"I'm sorry, Daddy. I know we talked about having a special dinner tonight," Severa said apologetically.
"That's okay, Honey. It's nothing we can't save for tomorrow night instead," Harry responded.
"We need to go, Jamie," Ella stated. "I promised Mike we'd be back by six o'clock and it's nearly that already." She leaned in and kissed Harry on the cheek and Severa on the top of her head.
Severa hugged first Ella and then her friend, Andrea. "Thanks, we will."
"Thanks, again, Ella. I managed to get everything finished. We'll see you in August," Harry added.
"Have a great summer, you two. And don't forget to send us a postcard," she said and they left.
Harry turned and knelt down in front of Severa. His eyes sparkling, he said, "I've got a surprise for you, someone to meet." Standing up, he led her by the hand to the sofa and sat down.
Severa looked at him and questioned, "Daddy?"
Taking a deep breath, he took her hands in his and began. "What do you remember of why I left England?"
Severa thought for a moment. "You told me there was a wizarding war and many people died including nearly everyone you cared about: your parents, your godfathers, your friends, other 'almost family' people, and my other father. You were very sad and decided to go somewhere that didn't have so many painful memories. So, you came to New York."
"That's right. Well, today, someone I thought had died found me. As you can probably imagine, I was very surprised." He stopped to take a deep breath.
"Who was it, Daddy?" Severa prodded.
Harry looked toward the kitchen where Severus was listening and watching and beckoned him over.
Severa looked up and they stared at each other for a few moments. Then she cocked her heard slightly to the side and said, "You look like me. Are you my other father?"
Severus cleared his throat. "I am. It is a pleasure to meet you, Severa." He bowed his head slightly in acknowledgement. "You might look like me, but you also look quite like Harry as well."
"I have his eyes and his coloring, but I have your build and silky hair."
"And his thirst for knowledge and quest for perfection," Harry added, amused.
"Daddy…" Severa complained, a little embarrassed.
"What? It's true," Harry countered. "How many times did you copy over your history paper before you felt it was ready to hand in?" he laughed.
"What's wrong with wanting to hand in quality work, Harry?" Severus queried.
"Nothing, but the problem was not with the quality – it was with the quantity. She was supposed to write a paper that was five pages maximum yet it was nearly double that. She kept editing and writing smaller and smaller until she managed to fit it all in."
"There's nothing wrong with wanting to be thorough in covering your topic," Severus said stubbornly.
"You see, Daddy," Severa commented to Harry.
Harry just looked from one to the other with a comical look on his face. "I think we are going to manage just fine – just the way it was meant to be."
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A/N: Please read and review! Thanks!