Remembering the hours

Disclaimer: Harry Potter characters belong to JKR, lyrics to Wolfsheim.

STORY:

'Sometimes I can't fall asleep/you lie beside me and I weep...'

... remembering the hours...

... I am your doll...

... you play with me...

... you use me...

... you throw me aside when you're finished...

... yet sometimes...

... I am permitted to sleep...

... beside you...

... afterwards...

... but then I cannot...

... it's not my fault my body is so foolish...

... I am bathed in sweat and tears...

... but my sobs come silently...

... not to disturb your sleep...

... when you are asleep you are no danger to me...

... when you are asleep you are beautiful...

... like a marble sculpture...

... like a corpse...

... please don't wake up...

... don't move...

'Dancing shadows on the wall/once you caught me... now I fall...'

... remembering the hours...

... you were on top of me...

... moving on me...

... in me...

... into me...

... you used me...

... having your way with me...

... filling me...

... fulfilling me...

... spurting your hot creamy seed into me...

... your salty sperm...

... you let me taste it...

... drink it...

... standing over me...

... while I tried to watch the shadows...

... not to distinguish between the two of us...

... sinning...

... committing incest...

... I know what this is about...

... the word had just appeared in my mind...

... when you caught me...

... when you yanked my head back...

... "Look at me, Draco!"...

... I kept my eyes on you...

... I kept moving...

... licking...

... sucking...

... swallowing...

... then I knew you wouldn't be able to look down at me...

... I dared to close my eyes...

... I found it hard to stay conscious, though...

... odd...

'Sometimes I feel love and trust/turn into anger and disgust'

... remembering the hours...

... when I was small...

... when you played with me...

... different games...

... but even then...

... I was always your doll...

... I didn't realize...

... I loved you...

... you were my world...

... my sun...

... my God...

... you are my world...

... my master...

... my God...

... but love...

... I don't know about love...

... there's only shame...

... and disgust...

... and pain...

... and darkness...

... burning darkness...

... and helplessness...

... and...

... well, I'm barely aware of...

... anything...

'Crawling darkness in between/no light in reach... no silver sheen'

... remembering the hours...

... the moaned whispers...

... the touches...

... your cruel hold around my hips...

... your...

... your...

... between my hips...

... your silvery hair...

... covering me...

... stifling my pleas...

... letting me drown in its softness...

... like in moonlight...

... your skin on mine...

... so alike...

... you...

... slamming me violently...

... and I...

... nowhere to run to...

'Sometimes I feel so ashamed/to be mercilessly framed.../Idle hands and eyes that stare/but no escape that I would dare.../Love and trust...'

... remembering the hours...

... there are no words to describe...

... there are no thoughts to be thought...

... there is only emptiness...

... you want me to become a second self of yours...

... to reach that...

... you have to delete everything that's me...

... leave me blank...

... a white sheet...

... to become Lucius...

... extinguishing even the shame...

... the hate...

... anything that's me...

... using your body...

... as a weapon...

... as an eraser...

'Pain increasing every day/no truth left I won't betray/One day our way leads to an end/why do I cry... I understand/That it's too late for me to go/I should have left you years ago/Hatred's flame will ever burn/Every day...'

... remembering the hours...

... looking forward to the hours...

... caught in the hours...

... in the images...

... in the darkness...

... crying emptiness...

... somtimes I cannot fall asleep...

... that's when you lie beside me and we weep...

END