Everyone stood at the bank of the chocolate river, watching the fat kid try to be sucked up through the pipe, including Willy Wonka. "The suspense is terrible...I hope it lasts." He said as he ate some sort of candy, watching his portly guest Agustus suffer.
"...You dick." His mother said from behind him.
In the back room, all of the Oompa Loompas were laughing and pointing at fatty in the pipe, enjoying his humiliation, and enjoying the break they get from slaving away for Wonka.
Just then, Iron Man landed on the Loompa's side of the river and looked around. "I am Iron Man, beer me...wait...this doesn't look like a beer factory..." He said, noticing the chocolate river. "Who the hell made this map?" He pulled out a kiddie menu, mistaking it for a map, and looked it over. And then he noticed the kid in the pipe. "Haha! Fat kid in pipe...hilarious."
"Do something, please!" The mother shouted from across the way.
"Okay! You're a bitch!" Iron Man shouted back. "There, I did something." Then the Oompa Loompas came out as Agustus was sucked clear up into another room, scaring Iron Man. "Oh my god, it's a troll parade!" He started to blast each and every one of them until the chocolate river was a blood river instead. "I am Iron Man, and I have no idea what I just killed...oh well, off to Pawtucket Pat's beer factory!" He flew through the roof, leaving the kids to cry over the mass killing spree that occurred.