Okay so I promised another E/O story. I've decided to do one I haven't tried before. So this is more drama filled, smut, angry and some romance. This takes place in the season 12 finale right after Elliot shoots Jenna. So review and let me know! Xox

Olivia looked at Elliot as he laid over the young dead girl. She never broke eye contact, she just stared at him and he just stared back at her. He was just sitting by her body, not moving. She got up and sat down in her chair as the EMTS came in. She just said there in shock. She didn't even know how to process what had just happened. She wasn't even the one that had shot Jenna. But she knew how hard Elliot must have been taking this. He had just shot a young girl, a girl that reminded him so much of his own daughter. He would take this hard, she expected him to. He finally stood up as they put Jenna in a body bag. He looked at Olivia with dead cold eyes. She knew from that point on he wasn't the same Elliot anymore. He would never be the same again.

"Elliot…" Cragen said as he stepped out of his office.

He raised his hand to him and turned and looked at Olivia once more and shook his head as he walked out of the squad room. He didn't know where he was going and he didn't care at this point. He walked outside as the cold rain hit his body as he ran down the street. Olivia ran outside after him.

"Elliot! Stop!" She grabbed his arm as she caught up with him.

He grabbed her arms and pushed her up against the building wall.

"No Liv. I can't I can't. I don't know what I just did but I can't. I can't with this job. I especially can't with you anymore. Now get the hell out of my face Olivia." He screamed as he turned away from her.

She stood there as the rain poured down on her. She pushed her head back against the wall and felt the hot tears fall from her eyes. She didn't even know what he meant. He wasn't making sense. She didn't know him anymore. He wasn't Elliot anymore. He wasn't her partner anymore, he wasn't the man she thought he was. She pushed off the wall and walked down the street and walked back into the squad room. Everyone stopped to stare at her, maybe they were staring because they felt bad for her…

"Benson." Tucker said as he walked in the room.

"What the fuck do you want? You came here to get one of our badges? Huh, like you seem to always try to fucking do. I am so not in the god damn mood for your stupid petty bull shit tonight."

"No I need to know where Elliot went."

"I don't know. I don't care."

She sat at her desk and starred at her hands and shirt that were lightly blood stained from Sister Pete. She sighed as she closed her eyes tight. She pictured what had happened over and over. It was like a flashing of images in her head. She tried to understand what Elliot meant by he can't with her. She didn't understand. She stood up and walked out of the squad room yet again. This time she wasn't coming back.

She walked out and seen Elliot sitting on her car. She didn't even look at him. She just climbed in and started the car. He quickly climbed in and looked at her soaking wet from the rain.

"What do you want Elliot? You are done with me remember?"

He just stared at her and didn't say anything. He actually wasn't really sure what to say. He knew what he should say but he didn't know if it was the right time. So he just stared at her.

"Okay either say something or get out of the car. I want to go home." She raised her eyebrow at him.

"I…love…Nothing I'm sorry." He said.

He quickly looked away and climbed out of the car. She climbed out and stared at him.

"All you ever were good at was walking away El, that'll never change." She yelled over the rain.

He walked over to her and grabbed her face looking into her eyes.

"Stabler!" Cragen yelled.

He quickly pulled away from her and walked up to Cragen. She got into the car and pulled out and drove home. She didn't know what that was. She didn't know what he was even trying to say or do.

She pulled up to her apartment and shut the car off. She just sat in the car and stared outside. She wiped the tears that were now flooding her face. She threw her head back into the seat and punched the steering wheel and screamed.

"FUCK." She cried out as she put her head on the wheel.

She gathered herself and climbed out of the car. She got into her apartment and shut her door. She pushed her back against the door and slide down it has she cried out loud. She put her head in her hands as her sobbing got louder. Soon she felt herself falling asleep.

She was startled awake when someone was knocking loudly on her door. She stood up and wiped her eyes and opened it.

There he was standing in front of her. She didn't know what he was about to do or say. She just looked at him just as he did to her. They never broke eye contact. He didn't know what he was going to do as he stood there in front of her. He made a mistake by even trying to do anything earlier. He looked at her tired puffy eyes. He gave her a little smile.

"Why are you smiling?" She asked as they stood there.

"You look so tired and worn out, but still gorgeous." He said as he brushed some damp hair out of her face.

She rolled her eyes at him but eventually smiled.

"So what did tucker say?"

"Oh well I'm cleared…"

"That's good. Why do you not look happy about that?"

"Liv. I can't keep doing this job. It's a let down 24/7. I only keep doing it because it's all I have left in my pathetic life."

"What are you saying El? I can't do this without you."

"Yes you can Liv. You are stronger then I am, believe me. You have this burning passion. You seem to never get tired of this job. You never want to give up, this is what you want. I don't. I use to love this job but I stopped loving it a long time ago. I love you Olivia Marie Benson. I am in love with you. But, I can't do this job even if it's for you. I can't. I need time and whatever. I killed someone for you today. What's stopping me from doing that again? Nothing, so I'm sorry I can't do this anymore. I'm going away for a while. Goodbye Olivia."

"Elliot you can't just leave me. You tell me you love me and leave. You can't just do that. You fucking can't."

"I'm sorry."

He walked away leaving her standing there alone and broken. He actually just killed her by walking away. She didn't even know what to do. She just stood there and watched him walk away…from her.