Here's an emo little fic inspired by and dedicated to Copperheadfightingninja! Apparently she got her motivation to write again after I sent her the beginning of one of my new short stories that I have to write for my creative writing class. So when she told me of her story idea, I tried to explain a possible scene and ended up writing an entire fic. xD I'm sorry Copper since I feel like I'm jipping your idea. D: But hey~ we're dedicating our stories to each other riiight?
This story kind of jumps right to the point, so bear with me.
Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach. But I sure as hell would love to :3
Taken.
Captured.
Incarcerated.
In order to protect her friends.
She was cornered and given an ultimatum.
She sided with the enemy, in order to protect.
She healed them, knowing it would cause suffering.
---
Initial confinement in Hueco Mundo nearly drove her mad.
She lived and breathed only for the sake of Aizen-sama's will.
Now that freedom had been swiped from her what was she to do?
The thought of killing herself crossed her mind, but wouldn't suffice.
"I live and breathe for the sake of Aizen-sama's will," she told herself.
So what is she to do now that all freedom had been taken from her?
She took the knife on the serving tray and tested it on her finger.
It sliced through her like butter and the pain made her smile.
She can't kill herself, but this was the best she could do…
---
Too bad the cutting stayed, even after her rescue.
They came too late. She was already addicted.
A part of her died while in Hueco Mundo.
Only the pain could release her.
Self-mutilation.
That's all.
Until…
Ichigo quickly grabbed Orihime's wrist as she tried to run away. Her head hung low in shame as he slowly pushed her sleeve up, revealing lines of dried crimson. Orihime dare not look in his eyes as carefully traced each healing, self-mutilating cut.
"Inoue..." he softly breathed out in disbelief.
The sound of her name flowing from his lips made her heart ache. Tears began to well in the corners of her eyes while he continued tracing each cut along her arm. She felt utterly ashamed. Ashamed he saw, ashamed he pitied her, ashamed he caught her. He found them all. Crisscrossing, shallow and deep, he found and softly traced each cut on her forearm with his fingertips.
"Inoue..." Ichigo breathed out once more, astonished at all the markings. Her chest tightened and the tears flowed from her eyes. Orihime felt his grip around her wrist loosen. Her arm swung to her side as he quickly reached for her other hand clutching the hem of her skirt. Ichigo rolled the sleeve up, only to reveal the same gruesome markings. He opened his mouth, but nothing could come out. His eyebrows furrowed, contemplating what to do or what to say. They stood in the dimly lit classroom, shrouded in complete silence.
Suddenly, Ichigo let go of her other arm. Her heart stopped as she heard his footsteps walking away. Had he given up on her? Her knees gave out and Orihime sank to the floor, clutching and holding her exposed arms to her stomach, kneeling over to cover them up. Her heart felt hollow. She wanted to cry out, but refrained when she heard Ichigo rustling with his bag. She turned her head to look at him. With vision blurry and eyes slightly swollen from crying, Orihime saw Ichigo press his shinigami representative badge against his chest and his physical body fall limp onto the floor. She watched in horror as he summoned Zangetsu, hovered the large zanpakuto over his own arm, and slowly sliced into his own flesh.
"K-Kurosaki-kun!" she exclaimed, but he scowled at her as he finished cutting his own arm. He didn't even flinch. But as his soul merged with his physical body, a crimson line formed on his arm and split his flesh open; he winced slightly from the pain. Ichigo walked over to Orihime, clutching at his new wound. He hovered over her, eyes full of concern.
"Kuro-"
"How did that feel?" he sternly asked her.
"Huh?"
"How does this make you feel?" he asked shoving arm in front of her face, dripping blood around her with his fingertips. She knitted her eyebrows together and pouted.
"That's not fair, Kurosaki-kun," she said, understanding the point behind his sudden actions. "You were using Zangetsu! Any person would feel horrified when you're holding that gigantic sword! Besides, you weren't watching me do it, so-"
"That's not the point, Inoue!" he said out of frustration, almost shouting. "How does it feel to know that someone you care about is deliberately hurting themselves?!"
"He cares about me? Of course he does, I'm his nakama." Orihime wryly smiled. "He cares for me, but that doesn't mean he loves me," she thought. Ichigo watched her think, believing he had gotten his point across, but to his surprise, she merely stared up at him with a slight frown on her face. "I'll heal them when I get home," she blankly said as she looked down and fixed her sleeves to cover her arms once more. Orihime pushed herself up, healed Ichigo's wound, and turned to walk away.
Ichigo stood there utterly confused. Something in his chest tightened as he watched her pack up her belongings. Something didn't quite fit. "She said that she would heal them," he thought, analyzing the situation. "But that doesn't mean she won't do it again…" He realized that now she had been caught, she would need to heal her wounds before he could catch her again. Ichigo briskly walked towards her as she buckled her school bag closed. She lifted her bag off her desk, only to have Ichigo push it back down.
"You never answered my question," he said as he grasped onto her bag. She looked into his eyes which stared intensely back. Her heart quickened. He was beginning to scare her. Orihime tugged her bag from his grasp and quickly walked towards the classroom door.
"Inoue!" he called after her. But she didn't even look back.
"Inoue!" he tried again. She reached the door, and he became desperate.
"Orihime!" he shouted at the top of his lungs. Surprise halted her and she turned to look back at him. But he was already at her side, holding the door shut. The surprise and happiness she felt when he called her by her first name became short-lived. "Inoue, you never answered my question!" he said, stepping between her and the door. "How does it feel to watch someone you care about hurt themselves?" he yelled as she turned away. She paced back and forth within the classroom. She bit her lip and threw her bag onto the ground.
"How does it feel?" she asked.
"How does it feel?!" she repeated.
"You're asking me how it feels to watch someone you care about hurt themselves? You don't need to ask me that, Kurosaki-kun. I've watched you fight countless battles- your body getting cut up, your face beaten into the ground, your bones being broken. I've watched you nearly die, and you compare this to witnessing all of that?!" Orihime raised her arm and roughly pulled back her sleeve, her nails lightly scratching off the dried blood and reopening her cuts. Hot tears rolled down her face, her heart beat rapidly in her chest, her body shook from anger. She felt like she was loosing her mind.
"You don't need to ask me, Kurosaki-kun. I already know. Sure, you didn't ram Kenpachi's, Byakuya's, Grimmjow's, Ulquiorra's, whoever's sword into your own flesh, but that still hurt to watch you nearly die. I've seen you with your leg shattered and arm broken. I've seen you lying amongst rubble, unconscious and with a hole in your chest. I've seen you lose yourself to your inner hollow. Don't ask me how it feels. I know what it's like to watch a loved one get hurt." She lost herself in the heat of the moment. "Do you know how you make me feel?! Do you know what it feels like to watch someone you love nearly die right before your eyes?!"
She immediately regretted it.
Orihime brought her hands over her mouth as if to trap the escaped words and backed herself against a wall.
How could she be so thoughtless?
Ichigo stood at the doorway, his head hanging low, his eyes full of sorrow.
"I-I'm sor-"
"I know what it's like, Inoue," he said, removing his hand from the door. "I know what it's like…"
He slowly approached, stopping right in front of her. The setting sunlight which flowed into the room softened the harsh color of Ichigo's hair. He looked almost serene as he stood before her. "I never told you, but my mother died right in front of me. In fact, right on top of me. Protecting me." Orihime's eyes watered. She couldn't understand it. She knew what happened to him, Tatsuki had told her- but she didn't cry then. So how could this be any different? Because he was the one telling it. Because he trusts her enough to tell it.
"And I never knew how or why until I became a shinigami. A hollow took my mom away," he continued while looking at the crying Orihime. Ichigo brought a hand up to her cheek and wiped away her tears. He softly took her hands into his, pulling back her sleeves to expose her minced flesh. "That's why…" He grabbed her by her wrists and pinned her against the wall. Orihime gasped out of shock. "That's why I don't want any of my loved ones to get hurt. Especially you, Inoue. I don't want you to get hurt…"
Strange, since the pressure her placed on her wrists was beginning to hurt her. Her eyes glanced back and forth between her aching wrists and Ichigo's intense stare. She looked up at him, discomfort in her eyes. He slowly loosened his grip, turned away and picked up her bag. Orihime rubbed where Ichigo had touched her, her heart quickening at the thought. She stared at her arms, ashamed.
Not because he saw. Not because he pitied her. Not because he caught her.
She stared at her arms, ashamed, because she hurt him.
"I-I'll heal them when I get home," she said once again, this time with a tiny smile and an ache in her heart. Ichigo turned to her and grinned. He felt that this time, it was real. He walked over to her with both their bags in hand and handed hers over.
"Want me to walk you there?"
"Mm." She merely nodded.
Well, that's it. Haha. Short, I know- but that's what happens when write these things 4 in the morning. xD Here's a little tidbit for those of you who don't really care for subtle confessions.
"Hey, Kurosaki-kun?" Orihime began as they walked to her apartment.
"Hmm?"
"Who are your loved ones?" she bluntly asked.
"W-What?" Ichigo stammered as heat rose into his cheeks.
"Who are your loved ones?" she asked again, staring intently at him with head cocked to the side and thumb being bitten. "You said that you don't want any of your loved ones to get hurt, so… who are your loved ones?"
:3
"W-Well… there's my mom, my dad, Yuzu, Karin…" he began listing, scratching the back of his head, wondering if he should tell her. "Then there's you…" A smile brightened up Orihime's face, but he quickly made it fade. "And Chad, Rukia, Tatsuki…Ishida? ...Renji?" he quickly added.
"Okay." She pouted and continued to walk. Ichigo felt his heart drop into the pit of his stomach. "W-Wait, y-y-you're the most important one, Inoue!" he yelled after her, surprised at his impulse. She merely turned her head and smiled. "Okay," she repeated with a large grin on her face. She continued to walk, leaving Ichigo with a feeling of complete emptiness.
"Hey!" he called out as he caught up to her. "D-Don't you have something to say back?" he hinted.
"No."
Ichigo raised an eyebrow at the flatness of her reply.
"You haven't said anything that requires my response Kurosaki-kun," she hinted.
Ichigo smirked. He knew what she was getting at.
"I love you, Inoue." He said it plainly as he passed her. He stepped in front of Orihime and grasped onto her shoulders. "So where's my respon-"
"I'm in like with you."
"Wha-" was all that could escape his lips as she began to laugh. "I'm joking, I'm joking. I love you too, Kurosaki-kun."
Ehh, show me some love?
And don't forget to show Copper some love too~