Disclaimer: I don't own The Rocky Horror Picture Show
A/N: So, here's a new story. It's less far fetched then some of my recent stuff. Hopefully it's good.
Columbia had been living with Frank for just a few weeks when she found out where he was from. Thanks to the accent she'd assumed that he – and his odd servants – were from England. The butler also had a British accent and the maid did sometimes.
Though they weren't really British. In fact, they weren't even
This frightened Columbia. So she began to avoid Frank. Such a thing was rather challenging since she slept in his secondary bedroom. Though – being the thin creature she was – Columbia managed to avoid him. Well, to avoid everyone.
The maid – Magenta – had to be sent after the girl. It seemed Columbia wasn't as afraid of her, probably since they actually had something in common. They were both female.
After a day or so of this nonsense, Frank decided he wanted Columbia to sleep in Magenta's room. He hoped that this would get Columbia more used to them all being aliens. Once she'd gotten more used to she'd be back in his room (or so he thought).
Magenta wasn't told of this. Understandably, she was quite surprised by the pink-haired girl's sudden presence in her room. In the middle of the afternoon she'd just shown up.
"We're gonna be living together now. We'll be like sisters… I hope!" Columbia said, her smile faltering by the end.
The girl's squeaky voice annoyed Magenta terribly. Though she refrained from saying anything on the matter. Or saying anything at all. Instead she just read an Earthling book she'd found. It happened to be Frankenstein, or the Modern Prometheus. Columbia hadn't read it, she not being very keen on literature, and didn't notice that Magenta was reading it.
For a moment, neither spoke. Then Columbia – the more talkative of the two – finally did.
"This is boring."
"Oh?" Magenta replied, not looking up from her book.
Columbia nodded. "It's no fun just sitting here. What do you do for fun?"
"Different things."
"What different things?"
"Read, write, fuck myself."
The last was a lie, invented to shock Columbia into temporary silence. It worked… though only for a moment.
"What do you read?"
"Books."
"What do you write?"
"Reports to my government. Zey sent us here to research Earthlings. Zough I'm supposed to be writing letters to them about all the things I learn from observing you lot. But, as, you may've noticed, he hasn't really let us leave ze house yet!"
Suddenly, Columbia had an idea: "I could help you! I'm an Earthling, after all. What do you need to know?"
Magenta smiled slightly. It was sort of sweet, this dear little thing volunteering information so willingly. Though she surely wouldn't if she'd know why the aliens needed to know about Earth. Even Columbia was clever enough to realize you shouldn't help people trying to invade you. Well, probably. Magenta wasn't sure what to think of her new roommate.
"What shall I say first? Can I tell you about my life?" Columbia asked.
"Yes," Magenta replied, reaching for a notebook and pen.
"I'll start with when I was just 18…"
On Earth – well, in the United States – 18 is when you're a grown-up. That means you can vote and all sortsa things. And get married, I guess.
Anyway, my parents were well off. That means they had enough money to buy good Christmas presents for everyone each year, and still. Christmas is a holiday where gifts are bought and church… happens. I suppose it's an Earth thing.
They'd named me Laura when I was born. 'Laura Trent', I was called. That's a very normal name - Columbia isn't. Though I don't like the name Laura now. But we'll get to that later.
My life was wonderful for the first 18 years. I wasn't ever a cheerleader in high school and I did listen to rock n' roll – rebels listen to that, you see – though I still was perfectly fine. I was still considered a 'good' kid, and didn't even date.
But when I turned 18 things weren't so swell anymore. Not only did I have more responsibility, I also had fewer rules to follow. I was finally an adult… though I didn't really act like one.
It all first began when I was walking to work one day. I worked at the local ice cream parlor, which opened at lunchtime. That's when I first ran into this kid. His name was Eddie and he happened to be a year my senior. Everyone knew that – despite being from a good family – he was not the kind of kid you want your daughter hangin' around.
Since I was 18 and thought myself invincible, I talked to him. He was smoking a cigarette at the time, standing next to his motorbike. Just standing there as if he were waiting for something – anything – to happen.
"Hello," I said.
"Hey," he replied. "You work at the ice-cream place, dontcha?"
I nodded. "Of course. Why?"
"No reason. Just thought I knew your face from somewhere."
Then he offered me a cigarette. I refused it, though moments later I wished I hadn't.
"… and that's how I began to become a rebel," Columbia said.
"Vhat's a cigarette?"
Laughing, Columbia dug into her sweater pocket and pulled out a pack. Then she took one cigarette out and lit it with a match that seemed to appear out of nowhere. The smoke made Magenta cough slightly. Though Columbia was used to it, and it calmed her slightly. Being in this foreign room made her nervous – more nervous than she looked. Smoking was just one of the many unhealthy things Columbia did to cope with life.
"How strange you Earthlings are," Magenta muttered, "vith all zese funny little customs…"
Columbia pondered this for a moment. "It doesn't seem strange to me. Though I guess 'normal' to you is 'strange' to me, and vice versa."
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