SUMMARY: Ichigo, Orihime, Chad and Uryu have been selected to attend Ouran Academy as honor students. Along with the Host Club, what will happen when the Host Club decides that the Karakura Gang are perfect new candidates for the Host Club?

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Bleach or Ouran Academy Host Club.

RATING: T

A/N: If you do not like the plot or the character pairings, then don't read this. You have been warned.

ONE-SHOT:

HOST CLUB CANDIDATES?

Ichigo Kurosaki, Orihime Inoue, Yasutora Sado and Uryu Ishida stood in front of Music Room 3.

"Ichigo, is this right?" Orihime asked softly, her stormy eyes looked into his chocolate as he smiled at her, a special reserved smile just for her.

"I'm sure, Orihime. It says so in the instructions."

"It's an abandoned music room, Kurosaki."

"Mm."

"But it looks so authentic, lets go inside." Orihime laughed, opening the door and a bright light emanated from the room and rose petals flew out. "Ooooooh!" Orihime squealed and ran in.

"Orihime! Wait!" Ichigo yelled, running in after her and as a result, Uryu and Chad ran in as well.

The light dissipated and there stood 7 handsome boys, in Greek mythology cosplay.

"Ah, the new students! Welcome to Ouran!" A tall blonde boy stood, he had striking violet eyes and wore a toga that stopped at his knees and it was opened to expose half of a well muscled chest. "This is the Ouran Host Club. I am Tamaki Suoh! The King of this club. I welcome you commoners to this world of beauty!" Tamaki raised his hands in the air and seemed to sparkle and glow as if he somehow had special effects somewhere in the vicinity.

Ichigo's eye twitched at the word 'commoner'. This stuck up, arrogant twerp just called a Substitute Soul Reaper a commoner? Ichigo would show him. His scowl took form.

"Oh no. Ichigo is doing his scowly face again!" Orihime said in her sweet timid voice, bringing all the male attention to her.

"Oh, my princess! Welcome to our host club! I am sorry for ignoring you, my dear!" Tamaki floated to Orihime and gifted her a blooming red rose, his face close to her own, his lips mere inches away.

Orihime went redder than the rose she held.

"What is your name, my sweet?" Tamaki asked her in a honeyed voice.

"O-Orihime Inoue. ." Her voice was shaky, she was trying to step back, but Tamaki only stepped closer.

"What a perfect name, a princess. . and it describes you beautifully. In this moment, I don't think I have ever met someone as beautiful as you. The sun could not be anymore radiant than you, a rose's sweet scent could not compare to yours, my dear." Tamaki spoke as his lips moved closer.

All three men grabbed Orihime and pulled her back.

Ichigo was livid, more so than the others.

"IF YOU TOUCH ORIHIME ONE MORE TIME, YOU'LL BE PUSHING UP DAISES!" Ichigo yelled, as he lunged for Tamaki, who shook in his place, unable to move at the frightening stare Ichigo pinned him with.

Lucky for Tamaki, Chad was closer to Ichigo and took hold of his shoulders and pulled him back. "Ichigo, calm down. He wasn't going to do anything to Orihime." Chad said in his usual deep, quite tone.

"How would you know Chad? One more inch and they would be k-k-k-"

"Kissing?" Two men who wore glasses piped up and with perfect synchronization: they pushed up their glasses. Everyone had their eyes on them.

Ichigo cried out incoherently.

They noticed each other and faced one another.

"Welcome to the Ouran Host Club, my name is Kyoya Ootori."

"Uryu Ishida, the pleasure is mine." They shook hands, looking just as calm and collected as if they were in a chess meeting and not in a music room with an orange-haired adolescent close to pummeling a blonde-haired club member.

"Ishida. I believe I recall a doctor at Karakura General Hospital. Ryuuken Ishida, he is your father, correct?" Kyoya spoke with easy knowledge, as if he had known Uryu all his life.

"Yes, that is correct. The Ootori name is well respected in the medical profession, it is nice to meet the son of such a generous company." Uryu spoke the same way, keeping his dark blue eyes on Kyoya's gray.

"Thank you, I shall pass that onto my father."

They stepped away and everyone kept staring at how much they were alike.

"Holy Hell. . . they could have been separated at birth!" Ichigo whispered. Chad and Orihime grunted in agreement while nodding furiously.

"Is this another Kyoya, come down from the heavens to help us on our journey to beauty and fame?" Tamaki whispered to his club members who started whispering their own ideas, apart from one sullen boy who stayed out of the conversation, muttering things underneath his breath.

"Hello! My name is Orihime Inoue! It's nice to meet you!" Orihime spoke up, right in front of the moody looking teen in an instant.

Ichigo smiled softly as he looked at her, she was trying to cheer him up.

"I-I'm Haruhi Fujioka. It's nice to meet you." Haruhi smiled and looked up at the red-headed girl with a sweet smile.

"My friend Tatsuki also cuts her hair that short. It actually suits you! But why aren't you wearing the girls uniform?" Orihime asked and the Host Club stopped dead in their tracks, frozen in time as they listened to Orihime's deduction of Haruhi's gender.

Ichigo walked up to Tamaki and poked his cheek.

The guy didn't even twitch.

"Yeah, why is that? I mean it's obvious you're a girl, so why wear the guy's uniform?" Ichigo chimed in, still staring at Tamaki's frozen form.

"Yeah." Chad piped up.

"It is rather unreasonable of a girl to hide her gender." Uryu spoke in the background.

"Well. . ." Haruhi began, but wasn't quick enough.

"Haru-chan is a boy! You should see him spit! Almost 2 miles!" A small boy who looked about five, spoke, holding a pink bunny. "Even Usa-chan knows that he's a boy!" The blonde boy held up his bunny rabbit 'Usa-chan' to prove his point.

"Yeah, we shower all the time. It's a. ."

"male bonding experience." Two identical twins jumped up and wrapped their arms around Haruhi's waist, who was trying to fight them off.

A tall dark haired male nodded his head, standing protectively over the little kid.

Tamaki was still emotionless.

"Well, Haruhi has to pay off a 300 thousand yen debt for breaking a priceless vase we were going to auction off. Ergo, to pay off that debt, Haruhi joined the Host Club and has to get 1 thousand requests and then will be able to pay off said debt." Kyoya spoke in that same refined tone.

The Karakura gang 'ahh'd as they finally got all the commotion.

Tamaki was again motionless.

Orihime put her finger to her chin. "But Haruhi is a girl. You need her to pay off that debt and in exchange, only boys are allowed in this club and for you must have thought Haruhi was a boy because of her hair, so you had her in the host club, but somehow found out she was a girl and hid it from everyone because she was already shown as a boy." Orihime said in that same timid voice.

Everyone once again froze.

Haruhi stared at Orihime with large brown eyes.

Tamaki screamed in fear. "HOW DID YOU KNOW!? WERE YOU SPYING ON US THIS ENTIRE TIME!?" Tamaki held Haruhi against his chest. "Don't worry, daughter! Daddy is here!"

Haruhi scowled and growled, it was useless to fight Tamaki-sempai when he was on a rampage like this.

"Ah, your file seems to be correct, Ms Inoue. You really are as bright as they say. Yes, since we can no longer deny it and Tamaki has more or less confirmed it, Haruhi is a girl and yes, she has to pay that debt with 1 thousand requests, then she is able to leave the Host Club and return back to her normal life." Kyoya spoke. "Oh, and I do believe you have not met the rest of the members. This is Hikaru and Kaoru Hiitachin, Honey Nozuka and Mori Nozuka." The Karakura gang bowed the heads and straightened.

Ichigo stepped up and nodded his head. "I'm Ichigo Kurosaki, this is Yasutora Sado, but we call him Chad. The kid with the glasses is Uryu Ishida and you've already met Orihime." Ichigo stepped right up to Tamaki. "And if you even breathe in her direction, I will make sure you won't wake up the following morning. You got that, blondie?" Ichigo asked, his teeth gritted as he burned into Tamaki with his most horrifying scowl.

Tamaki shook noticeably and sweated profusely. "Don't kill me. . . I won't breathe ever again!"

"Good, just so were clear." Ichigo smiled and then went back to his friends and stood in front of Orihime protectively.

Hikaru went up to Tamaki's ear while Kaoru whispered into Kyoya's and then both Mummy and Daddy looked at each other and the blonde, half french boy looked at each of the Karakura members, studying them easily, skipping Ichigo quickly.

"Yes, I believe they will qualify! But first, let us commence Operation-Change-Orihime-Into-A-Handsome-Boy-Like-Haruhi!"

Translation: Operation GIRL to BOY

"As of today, the Karakura members: Ichigo Kurosaki, Orihime Inoue. Yasutora 'Chad' Sado and Uryu Ishida, you are all now members of the Ouran Highschool Host Club!"

"Whaaaat~!?" Ichigo screamed, horrified at the prospect.

"Mm." Chad mumbled, not showing any emotion.

"Oh goodie!" Orihime squealed, clapping her hands together.

"This might be a good experience for us." Uryu said, clamping Ichigo's mouth shut with his hand.

But that wasn't good enough.

"WE DIDN'T AGREE TO ANYTHING!"

(..)

Ichigo looked on Orihime, her large breasts contained painfully to make her chest look flat, her lustrous hair hidden beneath a short burnt orange wig that made her look more manly, she wore the male uniform and it seemed like all the ladies present seemed attracted to Orihime- pardon- Daiko now.

'Daiko, you're so knowledgeable.'

'Oh, Daiko, you know exactly what a woman wants!'

'Daiko, please sign my poster of snowflake hairpins!'

Poor Orihime, yet she seemed to be entirely at home. Ichigo however seemed to be incredibly awkward.

"Ichigo, do you dye your hair?" One girl obnoxiously asked, making Ichigo scowl.

"No, this is my natural hair colour, get used to it!" Ichigo barked, making the girls freeze and then swoon in pleasure.

Orihime excused herself and walked up to Ichigo. "Excuse me, Ichigo, but can I talk to you for a minute?" Orihime smiled pleasantly and his scowl softened, making his customers scream in happiness.

"Sure, Daiko." Ichigo emphasized the new name that Tamaki had graced Orihime with and together they walked out of the music room and Orihime stretched. "I felt the presence of a Hollow before. I just want you to take over my clients while I go inspect it, okay?" Orihime, touched Ichigo's hand.

"Orihime, I don't want you getting yourself hurt. Don't ask me to stand by and watch while you put yourself in danger-"

Orihime pressed herself against Ichigo like she had done many times before and kissed him sweetly. Ichigo's arms wrapped themselves around her shapely waist and they shared a brief but passionate kiss.

"Don't worry about me. You know how I am. It'll be quick. If you want, you can come. But no interfering."

"Right."

Together they went of to kill the Hollow.

(..)

"Tsubaki! Koten Zanshun!" Orihime yelled and Tsubaki flew toward the Hollow, lopping off it's arm.

"Getsuga Tensho!" Ichigo screamed, slicing the Hollow in half.

"Ichi! I had it!" Orihime pouted prettily. "You promised you wouldn't interfere!" She pointed out, jabbing his chest with her gentle finger.

"I know, but I can't stand seeing my girl in trouble." Ichigo said, wrapping his arms around his girlfriends waist loosely. "By the way, you have been getting much stronger, I'm impressed." He pressed a soft kiss to her forehead and she rested against him.

"After the fight with Ginjo, I trained with Urahara and Yoruichi at the training area and I trained to become stronger so I would never be put against you again." Orihime snuggled closer as if to protect him from future battles. "And the little blue men stole my wasabi again." She added vehemently.

"Ah, the little blue men. We have to find their secret base. Isn't that Operation Banana Salmon and Rhubarb Soup?" Ichigo asked, smiling indulgently at his girlfriend.

Her eyes sparkled as delight crossed her face. "Ichi! You remembered our mission! Yes! We have to be in disguise. So here's what I'm thinking." Orihime pulled out a banana and fish costume from god-knows-where. "Okay! Since Banana is a fruit, and it's close with Strawberry, you get to be the banana, and since fishes scales are sparkly and I like them, I'll be Fishy!"

""Sounds good, Hime. We'll start as soon as we get home!"

"Goodie!"

Unbeknownst to Orihime, Ichigo was contemplating throwing those costumes out when nobody was looking and instead catching Orihime's attention in a particular different field in the bedroom.