A/N: Annnnggssssssssst.
Clandestine
A KakaSaku oneshot
To: The Esteemed Hokage
In the past months you may have noticed a slip in performance from your best jounin. I apologize. If his focus has been off it's only because I have been fucking him endlessly for months. He can get right randy whenever I return from the hospital in my medic uniform, or after training, or during training, or whenever it's time to shower, or during missions. We've both become quite preoccupied of late. Please forgive our lack of diligence. Know that we've been working on setting aside time to screw each other and perform our shinobi duties.
Much Love,
Your Best Apprentice
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Sakura set the letter down with a wide grin, taking time to scratch out a splotch of ink that landed in the corner, and ignoring the spilled ink all over her clothes. Kakashi's hands roving along her hips made it difficult to focus.
"Mm. You forgot to mention how she should lock her office door when she's not around." Kakashi nipped at the sensitive spot beneath her ear. His hot breath sent shivers that raced all the way down Sakura's spine in lively sparks. "And… how we're going to hump on her desk like horny rabbits. Tell her that."
Sakura raised a hand to entwine her fingers into his silver hair. Her face felt strangely heated. Even as she sat perfectly still in the chair, the room felt as if it were swaying. It was hard to think with the thick cotton curtain wrapped around her brain.
A hiccup left her mouth which she silenced with a giggle. "Do you…" hiccup. "…really think this is a good idea?"
Kakashi spun her around in the Hokage's seat, Sakura let out a squeal of laughter, waving her arms in the air as Kakashi lowered his face until their noses were inches apart. "The plan is to get fired, remember? So you can spend all your time with me." He let out a playful growl as he placed a sloppy kiss on Sakura's neck; however, he missed and ended up landing a kiss on her collar bone instead.
But Sakura was too busy laughing to notice. Her hands came crashing down with a fumble as she clutched on to Kakashi's vest for support. Kakashi's low voice buzzed against her shoulder, and tears pinched to her eyes from laughter. The room swayed to the side dangerously, and her stomach gave a dizzying lurch.
Sakura settled back for a moment to let her vision settle. She leaned back an arm and accidentally knocked into the bottles on the desk. One fell to the floor with an unceremonious crash.
"Ahaha! Yeah, but you know what, Kakashi? You know what…?!" She pawed away at his silver hair again to get his attention.
The jounin looked up with unfocused eyes. His headband was eschewed and mouth quirked up in a small smile. He paused and stared at the pink haired girl. It took him a moment to realize that the dancing bump before him was actually Sakura's nose.
"Even if Tsunade-sama did lock her doors it would be no use," she said, her voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper. "You know why?"
Kakashi had to clamp down on the amusement that threatened to rise. "Why's that?" he whispered back.
"Because…" Sakura said, her loud voice breaking forth. "Because we could break the locks… because we're ninjas…!!"
This time there was full blown laughter as Sakura closed her eyes and fell forward into Kakashi's vest. The force of her mirth caused to shoulders to shake as her loud voice echoed through the small room.
Kakashi was nearly knocked over by the sudden placement of her weight. The Hokage's seat which held Sakura rolled back as he stumbled a foot forward. This new position gave him a good look down his female student's shirt, and at the heated flush that covered her skin. The smell of alcohol from her breath burned his nostrils.
In the commotion, the letter from the desk fluttered lightly to the floor.
He paused to collect his thoughts as he stared at the paper, for a moment forgetting its purpose. His thoughts were like a bunch of train-carts piled together in a big mess, and Sakura's scrawled out words were like jumbled spiders attacking each other on the page. The dark ink flickered against his vision. In the corner of his eye, he could see their reflection in the large glass windows: a tall man with messy hair, slightly unsteady on his feet, and leaning heavily on to a chair over a smaller woman, with the back drop of the night sky.
In the reflection, the pink haired woman stretched around the man to open up a desk drawer and pull out a round hat. Kakashi looked back in time to see Sakura shoving the Hokage's hat over her head. From his taller angle, her face was half-hidden from view now, but he could still see her lips curved up into a smile of delight. The billowing white material draped the back of her body, and the bright red symbol for fire glared out from the front.
With clumsy hands she shut the drawer again with a slam, nearly falling out of the chair in the process. Kakashi threw out a heavy arm to catch her.
"I'm the Hokage now," Sakura declared.
Kakashi tilted the brim up with a flick of his fingers so that he could see her green eyes. "Naruto is going to be so upset."
"Fuck him," Sakura bit out. "We have bigger things to worry about now. What's next on our list?"
Kakashi paused for a moment, as if recollecting a foggy memory, then slowly reached over and rolled up his left sleeve. On his inner forearm were the many dark scribblings and symbols of what could have been words at one point, and set roughly in a list-like form. There was more ink that made a trail down his clothes and over Sakura's lap.
He squinted at the upside-down marks. Even in his far-off state, he could tell that the marks made nothing intelligible. "Your writing is so horrible I can't read it."
Sakura gave a scowl. "My writing is just fine."
Kakashi stared at the letter on the ground, also covered in scribbles – but wisely kept quiet over the issue. Perhaps, if everything looked better to Sakura at the moment, then he was in no position to complain. Especially, if she kept looking at him with such adoring eyes.
"Whatever you say, Hokage-sama," he placated. He pried his sharingan open to blink against the dryness, but then immediately shut it as the sudden clarity made his stomach churn.
"And I'm not… not drunk," she added defensively. Her face had taken on a bright red flush.
Kakashi would have responded, but for the life of him, he couldn't remember where they were, or what they were talking about.
Sakura prodded an accusing finger at Kakashi's chest. "You're the one who's… who's smashed off his ass."
"Hahaha… ass…" Kakashi giggled. For some reason he seemed terribly amused by this word.
But while Kakashi was beside himself with mirth, Sakura stared transfixed at his bare face. The room felt as if it was spinning beneath her body, but to her credit she hardly swayed from the dizzy motion.
Sakura bumped her head forward. The Hokage's hat fell away as she reached up.
"You're a pretty man," she said simply.
Then without further prelude, crashed her mouth to his. Kakashi offered no resistance, but she was forced to tilt her chin up at an awkward angle in order to run her tongue along his lips and into the cavern of his mouth, where she could taste the strong remnants of sake. The muscles along her neck began to strain before quite suddenly world moved about in an awful way. In the next moment, she found herself lifted up on to the desk.
Kakashi stood close by with Sakura hoisted before him. Paperwork crashed to the ground in a mess. Their mouths met again, Sakura wrapped her legs around his waist, and hands roved – grabbing clothes, grabbing hair – soft moans filled the air as their hips began to grind in earnest need. As always, they were moving fast. Moving with a sort of desperation. Soon, it would be the point of no return.
Sakura broke away, tears springing to her eyes. "St – stop," she said suddenly. She placed a hand on Kakashi's chest.
He paused. Harsh pants left his mouth as he fought to gain back some semblance of control.
"What's wrong?"
"I can't do this."
Her voice sounded like an echo in his head.
"Do what?"
"I can't do this," Sakura said, breaking off into an emotional quaver. Then quite suddenly… let out a loud sob. An unpleasant, broken sound.
Kakashi watched those tears slide down Sakura's face. A part of him wanted to lean over and taste the salt on Sakura's cheeks, but he fought the strange impulse, and proceeded to rub a warm hand up and down her back in a comforting motion instead. Slowly, slowly, sensible thoughts crawled back into his mind and logic kicked back into motion.
Their playing had come to an end, it seemed. The fine act they had put up all night, freely drinking and laughing as if there was nothing possibly wrong with the world – was over.
It was time for cold reality. A bitter taste rose to the back of his throat, as their small night of happiness shattered.
"It will be fine," he said softly. He mind felt heavy… and vision blurred, but he worked hard to focus.
Sakura's shoulders trembled. "H-how can you say that?" she gasped, another choked sob tumbled out.
"I don't know."
"Oh, god." A wail of muffled despair left her lips, as she buried her face into Kakashi's vest. "It wasn't supposed to go like this."
Kakashi could feel a major headache coming on. As if somebody just slammed the back of his head with a hammer. "I know." The world swam before his vision. He supported her body with heavy arms.
"We weren't supposed to get drunk," Sakura continued on. "We were supposed to take a drink at the bar then catch Tsunade before she left the tower."
"I know." A sigh left the jounin's lips, as his brows stitched together in frustration. The dull headache grew, pounding with each heartbeat. One drink of liquid courage turned in to three more as the night wore on, and then eventually led to the raiding of Tsunade's hidden stash once they discovered she had packed up and left the office early.
"I can barely face Tsunade-sama during the day, how the hell am I supposed to face her now?"
His grip tightened into a squeeze about her hips. "You won't be alone," Kakashi said firmly. "I'll be there. We were going to tell her together, remember?"
She refused to look at him in the eye. With sobs breaking loose between every other gasping breath. "It's just… I'm so afraid. Do you know what happened the last time something like this took place? The sensei was evicted from the village, and the student sent to another team. Ostracized. Never accepted by the shinobi world again."
"That scandal was over forty years ago…"
"Right. forty years. That's because people don't do the kind of stuff we do, Kakashi. Students aren't supposed to seduce their sensei, and sensei aren't supposed to take advantage of their students. They aren't supposed to meet in secret and screw each other mindlessly for months on end."
The more Sakura spoke, the more Kakashi could feel his own anxiety grow. A cold, hard feeling twisted away at his stomach. It wasn't easy locking all his concerns, and keeping up such a cool, self-assured appearance in front of the worried girl.
Sakura was unsteady, with shoulders trembling in fear. Her pink hair fell forward, briefly forming a curtain between Kakashi's line of sight and her wet cheeks.
"I can't do this anymore," she said, she was chewing on her thumbnail. Her eyes glazed over in a sleepy drowse.
She was still so young. Kakashi could see that now. The thought occurred to him before, but never so vividly as now. She was so young… and he was a horrible lecher.
But the raw need was there whenever they locked gazes – whether it be from walking down the street, or across the training field, or in the dark cover of his apartment. There was no denying that unexpected chemistry between them. Kakashi longed for her body. The desire clawed away at his chest like beast.
And she gave herself over to him each time. Their hungry mouths would meet in a clash, and she would reassure him with ecstatic shouts and moans that she enjoyed his touches. It was pure poetry when their bodies connected, and they reveled in primal passion.
Her slender arms wrapped around his neck so easily. With bright green eyes and a honey breath she would tell him that they would never get caught. Things would turn out fine. They were sweet lies, but she said it with such guile that he willingly believed them each time before sinking in for another kiss. Sakura had always reassured him in the past, but now their fantasy had unraveled… and they could no longer hold up the act.
There was so much fear, and so much desire in their relationship.
How times had he emptied himself out into her before? How many times had he filled her body, felt her go wild around him, and taken her mindlessly? Countless times. Countless.
Now the axe hung over their heads.
"Oh, god." Sakura said again, looking sick. She fumbled for a grip on Kakashi's vest as she swayed back and forth. Her fear was so tangible it sent prickles along his skin. An acrid taste in his mouth.
Kakashi lightly brushed the pink hair from Sakura's face. Then leaning in - slowly, gently led her through a kiss. He coaxed her, and in a few strokes of their lips they told each other all of their secret fears and doubts, in a way more than words ever could tell. With hearts racing, they indulged in the tasting the forbidden. Hearts adoring the lust.
"There's still time to leave," Kakashi said quietly.
Sakura shook her head.
"Are you sure this is what you want? I could take you away…" Kakashi's grip tightened about her waist. The seals for the transportation jutsu sluggishly ran through his mind. "I could take you away from here right now," he said, with some true menace in his voice. It was what he wanted most.
"No, don't!" Sakura cried.
They searched each others' eyes, looking for a reconnect. A low moan broke away from Kakashi's lips. Need… god, how he needed her…
"Why are you so set on confessing?" Kakashi asked. There was a quiet desperation in his voice. "Are you really that unhappy?"
"I already told you," Sakura said. "You're not the one making me unhappy. All of this guilt and secrecy is crushing me. I can't breathe, or eat, or sleep anymore. I feel like I'm dying. We have to tell." Her head had fallen forward, and she wiped her tears against his sleeve. "We have to tell…"
The last thing he ever wanted to do was confess, but he wasn't about to trap Sakura into a life of sordid secrets either. Kakashi briefly wondered if this would be their end.
He gently cradled Sakura into an embrace. Perhaps this had been his fault all along. Being the sensei and adult, he should have put a stop to her advances. There was no denying that it was taking a toll on both their lives. All the lies… all the guilt and secrecy… even the quality of their mission work had taken a sharp decline. It was beginning to affect those around them. Even for ninjas, there was a limit to how much deception a person could live out on a daily basis before going insane.
And now here they were, hanging on to each other hopelessly in the Hokage's office. On the edge of blowing their relationship wide open. Their hearts full of trepidation.
Sakura sobbed quietly into his chest. So young and tender. This act was something they could no longer keep up. He couldn't keep up with the fantasy any longer. No matter how his body yearned to just snatch her away and force her into more tense months of silence and bliss… If things continued as they were now, then everything would slowly, inevitably lead to a horrifying crash. Something far more terrible than of what they had in store for them now. This was reality – falling apart at the seams.
The cogs in his mind worked slowly.
"Then we'll wait here," he said with a sigh; a man resigned to his fate. The soft breath he let out against her hair was like a quiet apology. He was getting groggy. Darkness threatened to close in like a warm blanket and take away his awareness.
"I'm sorry, too," she whispered.
And yet…
Sakura's eyes fluttered shut. She had such a peaceful look. Kakashi waited patiently for her heart rate to even out as she dozed off into sleep. Perhaps, she would rail and shout against him in the morning, hate him for the rest of eternity, or sob more heart-breaking tears…
Perhaps, deep down he was just a selfish bastard, or coward afraid of losing what he had…
Either way, Kakashi only felt a small pang of regret as he jutsu-ed their way out of there. There was a cold whirl of air, then the enclosing warmth of his apartment. He carefully set Sakura down into his bed. Then climbed in after her with a tired moan. Hopefully, Sakura would forget everything that happened tonight.
And they could both wave it off as a bad dream.